Milk Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on milk puns! 🥛🌱

Milk is loved both as a drink on its own, and as an addition to (or a base for) other drinks like coffee, hot chocolate, and milkshakes. It’s also popular as a condiment of sorts, with many dipping chocolates or cookies (or biscuits, depending where you are in the world) in their milk.

Unfortunately, the industry that produces milk is not so wholesome – it’s a system that profits from abuse and and neglect, with the suffering always ending in death. It’s an industry that we don’t need to participate in, are there are plenty of dairy-free milk options (sometimes called “mylk”) that we can enjoy instead.

Apart from the taste, a lot of people are convinced of the health benefits of milk, the main one being calcium. Not only does a glass of milk have less calcium than we might initially think (less than a bowl of spinach or kale), but our ability to digest and actually benefit from the calcium in milk is debatable. There are plenty of other foods that we can derive our daily calcium from.

Whether you’re here for a witty instagram caption, a quick one-liner for your tinder date or facebook argument, we hope that you find the milk pun that you need.

If you’re after related puns, we also have cow puns, chocolate punscheese puns, ice cream puns, Easter puns and coffee puns, and have chocolate and cereal puns coming soon too!

Milk Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about milk that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of milk puns:

  • Utter → Udder: As in, “Udderly inconsiderate.”
  • Under → Udder: As in, “Udder no illusions” and “Born udder a lucky star” and “Buckle udder the strain” and “Pull the rug out from udder you” and “Don’t let the grass grow udder your feet” and “Down udder” and “Everything udder the sun” and “Get udder way” and “Get udder your skin” and “Keep udder wraps.”
  • Make → Milk: As in, “Absence milks the heart grow fonder” and “Milk up your mind” and “Can’t milk head or tail of it” and “Details milk the difference” and “Enough to milk you sick.”
  • Silk → Milk: As in, “Smooth as milk” and “Milky smooth.”
  • Milk: These milk-related phrases are general enough to work as puns: “Mild as milk” and “Don’t cry over spilt milk” and “Land of milk and honey” and “Milk dry” and “Milk it for all it’s worth” and “Why buy the cow when the milk is free?”
  • Note: all of these milk puns could also work for “mylk”, which is the term for non-dairy milks (or mylks!)
  • Coincidence → Cowincidence: As in “This was no cowincidence.”
  • Camouflage → Cow-moo-flage: As in “We cow-moo-flaged well amongst the shrubs.” and “Put on your cow-moo gear – we’ll need to be sneaky.”
  • Cowabunga: “Cowabunga, dude!”
  • Cow: There are several idioms/phrases which include the word “cow”, and so might be used as cow puns in the right context: “A cash cow” and “Don’t have a cow!” and “Holy cow” and “A sacred cow” and “Until the cows come home” and “Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free?”
  • *cow*: If a word contains the “cow” sound (or anything vaguely similar), it can obviously be turned into a silly cow pun: cowncil (council), cowntenance (countenance), cownteract (counteract), cownterfeit, cownterbalance, cownterpart, cownterproductive, cownt, cowntry,  cowntess, cowntless, cowardice, coward (or cow-herd), accowntability, accowntants, encowntered, knocowt (knockout), encowntering, scowting, unaccowntable, loocowt (lookout), discownted, scowl, miscowculation.
  • Co* → Cow*: If a word begins with the “co” sound, it can sometimes be turned into a silly cow pun: cowoperation (coooperation), cowagulation (coagulation), cowaxial (coaxial), cowefficient (coefficient), cowconut (coconut), cowcaine (cocaine), cowercive (coercive), cowexistence (coexistence), cowhabitation (cohabitation), cowherently, cowherence, cowld-blooded, cowhesive, cowhesion, cowordinates, cowordinator, cowvert (covert).
  • Under* → Udder*: As in, “How do I make you udderstand?” and “A grand uddertaking” and “Uddermine your authority” and “Uddergoing a transformation” and “Compassion and udderstanding.” Other words: uddercut (undercut), udderway (underway) and udderscore (underscore).
  • *utter* → *udder*: As in, “I can’t believe it’s not budder!” and “All a-fludder (flutter)” and “A cluddered (cluttered) room” and “Mind in the gudder” and “Muddering under your breath” and “Did I studder?” and “Spuddering (sputtering) with indignation” and “Float like a budderfly, sting like a bee.”
  • A quick note that while we’re able to make cute udder puns, udder infections in dairy cows is painful, can cause death, and while it’s generally preventable, it’s the most common disease for dairy cows due to the unhygenic conditions they’re kept in and the neglectful attitudes towards the cow’s health. Any of us that’s ever gotten mastitis from breastfeeding will be able to sympathise with this!
  • Dare he → Dairy: “How dairy?” Note: Here are some handy facts about the dairy industry.
  • Diary → Dairy: As in, “Bridget Jones’ Dairy” and “Let me consult my dairy” and “Dear dairy…”
  • *dary → *dairy: boundairy, legendairy, quandairy, secondairy. Note: a quandary is a difficult problem.
  • *dery → *dairy: embroidairy (embroidery), spidairy (spidery), doddairy (doddery), powdairy (powdery).
  • Dearly → Dairy: As in, “I love you dairy” and “Dairy beloved…”
  • Daring → Dairy-ng: As in, “A dairy-ng escape” and “The dairy-ng adventures of…”
  • *dari* → *dairy*: As in, “Stand in solidairy-ty” and “Learning Mandairyn” and “Healthy relationship boundairys.”
  • *deri* → *dairy*: dairyve (derive), dairyvative (derivative), dairysion (derision) and dairysive (derisive). Note: if something is derivative, then it’s based on something else.
  • Mikayla → Milkayla
  • Mood: As in “I’m in a bad mood today.” and “I’m not in the mood for it.”
  • *moo*: If a word contains the “moo” sound (or similar), it can often be turned into a silly cow pun: amoosed (amused), moovies, immoovable, Moohammad, moovement, remooval, Moostafa (Mustafa), Moossolini (Mussolini), remoovable, remooving, smooth, unmooved.
  • Past your eyes → Pasteurize: This one is very specific! “Don’t blink! It’ll go pasteurize in a second.” Note: pasteurization is a sterilisation process.
  • Lack those → Lactose: As in, “I can’t drink milk as I lactose enzymes required to digest it.” Note: lactose is a sugar found in milk, which many people aren’t able to digest or tolerate.
  • Litre: In some countries, milk is sold in litres/liters, so we’ve included some related puns here:
    • Later → Litre: As in, “Buy now, pay litre” and “Catch you litre” and “It’s litre than you think” and “Sooner or litre” and “Can we continue this litre?”
    • Letter → Litre: As in, “Four litre word” and “Chain litre” and “Litre perfect” and “Litre to the editor” and “To the litre” and “I’ll send you a litre.”
    • Lighter → Litre: As in, “The litre way to enjoy chocolate” and “Feeling litre than air” and “Litre than a feather” and “Feeling litre than before.”
    • *liter* → *litre*: As in, “Yes, I meant that litreally” and “It’s all in the litreature” and “Don’t have to be so litreal about it” and “Litreacy rates across America.” Other words you could use: litreate (literate), oblitreate (obliterate) and illitreate (illiterate).
    • Collateral → Collitre-al: As in, “Collitre-al damage.”
    • *lete → *litre: As in, “You’ve made a complitre mess of it” and “That product is obsolitre” and “Deplitred (depleted) funds” and “Delitre the files” and “Built like an athlitre.” Other words that could work: replitre (replete), incomplitre (incomplete) and complitrely (completely).
  • Lait: “Lait” is French for milk, and is a common word in the coffee-drinking community (as in, “cafe au lait”). Here are a few silly puns that involve the word “lait”:
    • Late → Lait: Lait is actually pronounced without the “t” at the end, so this isn’t a perfect pun but it can still work quite well: “Better lait than never” and “Buy now, pay laiter” and “Fashionably lait” and “A day lait and a dollar short” and “It’s never too lait” and “A lait bloomer” and “Lait in the day/game” and “Running lait.”
    • Lay → Lait: As in, “Couldn’t lait a finger on” and “Lait a trap” and “Lait down roots” and “Lait eyes on” and “Lait down your arms.”
    • *lay* → *lait*: As in, “Let’s plait!” and “Could you relait the situation?” and “On full displait” and “Unforseen delaits (delays)” and “An ornate jade inlait” and “It’s okay to hate the plaiter (player) AND the game.” Other words: waylait (waylay) and slait (slay).
    • *ly → *lait: As in, “A familait (family) matter” and “A full assemblait (assembly)” and “Yes, probablait.” Other words that could work: arguablait (arguably), inevitablait (inevitably), presumablait (presumably), notablait (notably), possiblait (possibly), bubblait (bubbly), publiclait (publicly), friendlait (friendly), hardlait (hardly), badlait (badly) and kindlait (kindly).
  • Pint: Some countries still sell milk measured in pints, so we’ve included some pint-related puns here:
    • Point → Pint: As in, “At this pint in time” and “Beside the pint” and “Brownie pints” and “Drive your pint home” and “Get right to the pint” and “Jumping off pint” and “Not to put too fine a pint on it” and “I see your pint of view” and “Pint out” and “Pint the finger at” and “A talking pint” and “The sticking pint” and “Case in pint” and “The finer pints of” and “The pint of no return.”
    • Pants → Pints: As in, “Ants in their pints” and “Beat the pints off” and “By the seat of your pints” and “Fancy pints” and “Keep your pints on” and “Pints on fire” and “Smarty pints.”
    • Pent → Pint: As in, “Pint up rage.”
    • Pin → Pint: As in, “Bright/clean/neat as a new pint” and “Hard to pint down” and “Pint your ears back” and “Pint the tail on the donkey.”
    •  *pet* → *pint*: As in, “Don’t use that pintulant (petulant) tone with me” and “Perpintual motion machine” and “A compintent (competent) worker.” Other words: impintus (impetus), compintition (competition) and compintence (competence). Note: an impetus is something that compels or encourages you to do something.
    • *pant* → *pint*: As in, “Nothing in the pintry” and “Pinting with fear” and “Disease is rampint” and “A flippint attitude.” Other words that could work: pintomime (pantomime), participint (participant) and occupint (occupant).
    • *pent* → *pint*: As in, “Pinthouse suite” and “Repint for your sins!” Other words: serpint (serpent), pintagram (pentagram) and carpinter (carpenter).
    • Paint → Pint: As in, “A lick of pint” and “A picture pints a thousand words” and “As boring as watching pint dry” and “Body pinting” and “Do I have to pint you a picture?” and “Finger pinting” and “Pint the town red” and “Pinting by numbers.”
  • Skim: Skim milk is where all of the cream is removed from whole milk, and is very low in fat. Here are some skim milk puns:
    • Scam → Skim: As in, “Skim artist.”
    • Slim → Skim: As in, “Skim pickings” and “The real skim shady.”
    • Swim → Skim: As in, “Sink or skim” and “Going skimmingly” and “Skim against the tide” and “Skim with sharks” and “Skim upstream.”
    • Scum → Skim: This is a bit of a stretch but can still work, as in: “Pond skim” and “Skim always rises to the surface.”
  • Cream: Cream is the part of milk that determines the fat content, and “full cream” is another type of milk, so we’ve included cream puns here for you:
    • Cram → Cream: “Creamed with fresh fruits and berries.”
    • Dream → Cream: As in, “I have a cream” and “Beyond my wildest creams” and “Broken creams” and “Cream on” and “Cream big” and “A cream come true” and “I wouldn’t cream of it” and “In your creams.”
    • Crime → Cream: As in, “Cream and punishment” and “Cream against nature” and “Cream doesn’t pay” and “A cream of passion” and “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the cream” and “Partners in cream” and “The perfect cream” and “A victimless cream.”
    • *crem* → *cream*: creamation (cremation), creamate (cremate), increamental (incremental), increament (increment) and increamentally (incrementally).
    • *crim* → *cream*: As in, “Smooth creaminal” and “Blushing creamson” and “Don’t discreaminate against” and “Racial discreamination.”
    • *cram* → *cream*: We can swap “cram” sounds for “cream”, like so: “Creamping my style” and “Foot creamp” and “Screambled eggs on toast” and “Holy sacreament.” Note: a sacrament is a sacred act.
  • Whole: Whole milk is the term for milk that hasn’t had anything removed from it (like fat). Here are some wholly bad puns for you to use in reference to it:
    • Hole → Whole: As in, “Ace in the whole” and “Burn a whole in your pocket” and “Fire in the whole!” and “A whole in one” and “Whole in the wall” and “Wholed up” and “Picking wholes in.”
    • *hol* → *whole*: As in, “Please whole’d the line” and “A whole-istic healing approach” and “Whole-low inside” and “On wholeiday” and “A wholey (holy) offering” and “Beauty is in the eye of the bewholeder” and “Alcowhole content” and “Menth-whole flavoured” and “Crossing the thresh-whole‘d (threshold).”
  • Hi-Lo: Hi-lo (or HiLo) milk is reduced fat – so “high in calcium, low in fat.” Here are some related puns:
    • Hello → Hi-lo: As in, “Hi-lo, big boy” and “You had me at hi-lo” and “Hi-lo hi-lo, what’s going on here then?”
    • Hollow → Hi-lo: As in, “Hi-lo eyed” and “A hi-lo goodbye.”
  • Sour: Sour milk is a common enough phenomenon for us to include here:
    • *sar* → *sour*: As in, “A sourdonic (sardonic) reply” and “Sourcasm isn’t helpful” and “No need to be sourcastic” and “Caesour salad” and “That’s not necessoury” and “Wedding anniversoury” and “A strong adversoury” and “Read the glossoury.” Note: to be sardonic is to be mocking or cynical.
    • *ser* → *sour*: As in, “At your sourvice” and “A sourious conversation” and “Filled with peace and sourenity” and “Close your browsour tabs” and “Brings us closour together” and “Teasour trailer.”
    • *sor* → *sour*: As in, “Filled with sourrow” and “What sourcery is this!” and “I’m sourry” and “I don’t need the sourdid details” and “Trip advisour” and “University professour.” Other words that could work: sponsour (sponsor), supervisour (supervisor), processour (processor), censour (censor) and consourtium (consortium). Note: a consortium is business partnership, or an association between institutions.
    • *sur* → *sour*: As in, “A quick sourvey” and “A sourreal situation” and “As far as I can sourmise” and “On the sourface” and “Recovering from sourgery” and “Sourrogate mother” and “What a sourprise.”
  • Farm: Since milk is from farms, we’ve got some farm-related puns here. We’d also like to note that while happy cows being milked by hand on a friendly farm is a nice idea, that is not how farms (even free-range ones) operate.
    • Firm → Farm: As in, “Farmly planted” and “A farm tone of voice.”
    • Form → Farm: As in, “Defence is the best farm of offence” and “Bad farm” and “Farm follows function” and “Free farm” and “Imitation is the sincerest farm of flattery” and “In fine farm” and “The lowest farm of wit” and “Not in any way, shape or farm” and “Take farm” and “True to farm.”
    • From → Farm: As in, “A little farm column a, a little farm column b” and “A week farm next Tuesday” and “Farm a nice place” and “Come in farm the cold” and “Cut farm the same cloth” and “Fall farm grace” and “Farm a mile away” and “Farm a to z” and “Farm cover to cover” and “You’ll have to pry it farm my cold, dead hands” and “Farm soup to nuts” and “With love, farm…”
    • Charm → Farm: As in, “Farm the birds out of the trees” and “A farmed life” and “Southern farm” and “Third time’s a farm” and “Works like a farm.”
    • *fam* → *farm*: As in, “Friends and farmily” and “Seems farmiliar” and “Almost farmous” and “40 hour farmine” and “I’m farmished!” Other words: infarmy (infamy), infarmous (infamous) and defarmation (defamation). Note: infamy is a reputation (or fame) or evil.
    • Harm → Farm: As in, “First, do no farm” and “Grievous bodily farm” and “In farm’s way” and “No farm done” and “No farm, no foul.”
    • Infomercial → Infarmercial
    • *form* → *farm*: farmidable (formidable), farmula (formula), farmer (former), farmat (format), farmal (formal), farmation (formation), farmative (formative), farmality (formality), confarm (conform), infarm (inform), platfarm (platform), transfarm (transform), perfarm (perform), unifarm (uniform), infarmation (information) and perfarmance (performance).
    • Pharmacy → Farmacy
  • Spoil: If milk is off/expired, it’s referred to as spoiled, so here are some related puns:
    • Boil → Spoil: As in, “Spoiling with rage” and “It all spoils down to” and “Bring to the spoil” and “A watched pot never spoils” and “Spoil over.”
    • Spell → Spoil: As in, “How do you spoil…” and “You’ll have to spoil it out” and “Be under [someone’s] spoil” and “Break the spoil.”
    • Spill → Spoil: As in, “Spoil the beans” and “Spoil your guts” and “Thrills and spoils.”
    • Gospel → Gospoil: As in, “The gospoil truth.”
  • Choc: We all love choc milk, so it’s earned a place in this list. Choc milk is so popular that you may get away with using just the word “choc” as a reference to milk (here’s a nice chocolate milk recipe for you to try as well):
    • Check → Choc: As in, “Choc it out!” and “Choc your sources” and “Double choc everything” and “Keep in choc” and “Make a list, choc it twice” and “Take a rainchoc” and “Reality choc” and “Choc-ing up on.”
    • Chalk → Choc: As in, “Different as choc and cheese” and “Choc it up to experience.”
    • Chuck → Choc: As in, “Choc a sickie” and “Choc-ed out” and “Choc overboard.”
  • Shake: Since milkshakes are such a popular milk drink, you may get away with using “shake” to refer to “milkshakes” in your wordplay:
    • Shock → Shake: As in, “Culture shake” and “In for a shake” and “In shake” and “Shell-shaked” and “Shake and awe.”
    • Ache → Shake: As in, “Old shakes and pains” and “Splitting headshake.”
    • Sake → Shake: As in, “For heaven’s/goodness shake” and “For old time’s shake.”
  • Kefir: Kefir is a fairly recent probiotic, milk-based drink. Here are some related puns:
    • Key for → Kefir: “This is the kefir the back door.”
    • Keep her → Kefir: “Being able to draw helps kefir spirits up.”
  • Soy milk: Soy milk is perhaps the most widespread (and cheap) non-dairy milk available and comes in different flavours. Here are some related puns:
      • So → Soy: As in, “Soy on and soy forth” and “I wouldn’t go soy far as to…” and “How soy?” and “If I do say soy myself” and “Not soy fast!” and “Soy be it” and “Soy long as” and “Soy much for” and “Soy there.”
      • *sey* → *soy*: As in, “An epic odyssoy” and “Hit the bullsoy.”
      • Say → Soy: As in, “As the soying goes” and “Before you could soy anything” and “Computer soys no” and “Do as I soy, not as I do” and “Does exactly what it soys on the tin” and “Have a soy” and “My final soy” and “I’m hearing what you soy” and “Just soy the word” and “Needless to soy” and “Never soy never” and “Soy a few words” and “Soy goodnight” and “Soy it, don’t spray it” and “Soy what you mean” and “As I was soying” and “If I do soy so myself” and “Soy again?” and “To soy nothing of” and “To soy the least.”
      • Thesaurus → Thesoyrus
      • *so* → *soy*: espressoy (espresso), virtuosoy (virtuoso), esoyteric (esoteric), philosoyphy (philosophy), resoylution (resolution), soylution (solution), soyphisticated (sophisticated) and soydium (sodium).
  • Almond milk: As almond milk is another popular type of milk, we’ve got some almond puns here too (and here’s a popular almond milk brand):
    • Amend* → Almond*: As in, “The 13th almondment is a lie” and “You’ll have to almond that document” and “They’re almonding it now.”
    • *ommend* → *almond*: As in, “I highly recalmond (recommend)” and “Your work is calmondable.”
  • Rice milk: Another readily available dairy-free milk option which we’ve included a few puns for here:
    • Raise → Rice: As in, “Rice a stink” and “Rice hell” and “Rice the bar” and “Rice the roof.”
    • Race → Rice: As in, “Rice against the clock” and “A rice against time” and “Rice to the bottom” and “Rat rice.”
  • Owed → Oat: As in, “Give me what I am oat!” Note: this is a reference to oat milk.
  • Contents → Condensed: As in, “Let me check the condensed” and “Have you read the condensed section?” and “Home and condensed insurance.” Note: this is a reference to condensed milk.
  • Case in → Casein: “Casein point.” Note: casein is a protein found in milk and dairy products.
  • Curdle: If milk is really off, it can curdle. Here are some terrible and related puns:
    • Hurdle → Curdle: “Fall at the last curdle” and “Clearing all the curdles.”
    • Could → Curd: As in, “Fast as his legs curd carry him” and “Curdn’t care less” and “I curd do it in my sleep” and “Curd see you a mile off” and “Curdn’t believe it” and “If looks curd kill” and “It curd be you next” and “Curd never let you go” and “Curd have heard a pin drop” and “Curd have knocked me down with a feather.”
    • Card → Curd: As in, “Calling curd” and “Curd up your sleeve” and “Deck of curds” and “Get out of jail free curd” and “Holding all the curds” and “House of curds” and “Lay your curds on the table” and “On the curds” and “Play your curds right.”
  • Breast: Well, this is where milk comes from, so it seemed wrong to not include breast puns (keep ’em respectful) here too:
    • Best → Breast: As in, “All the breast” and “Be the breast” and “Breast friends forever” and “Breast in show” and “Breast of all” and “Breast practice” and “Bring out the breast in me” and “Doing what we do breast” and “Honesty is the breast policy” and “Hope for the breast” and “Living well is the breast revenge” and “Nothing but the breast” and “On your breast behaviour.”
    • Pressed → Breast: As in, “Breast for time/money.”
    • *best* → *breast*: As in, “The greatest honour I could breastow” and “Breastselling novel.”
    • *pressed* → *breast*: As in, “Deeply imbreast (impressed)” and “Subbreast (suppressed) feelings” and “I exbreast (expressed) my emotions to her” and “An unimbreast (unimpressed) tone.”
    • Prestige → Breastige
  • Memory → Mammary: As in, “Down mammary lane” and “In living mammary” and “Mammary lapse” and “Mammary like a sieve” and “Thanks for the mammaries.” Note: mammaries are the milk-secreting organs in breasts.

Note: if you’d like further information about the dairy industry or avoiding dairy in your diet and lifestyle, the documentary Dominion is a great place to start. For further information on other animal industries and support in starting your own vegan lifestyle, Earthling Ed’s videos are a great source of information, as are the vegan and animal rights subreddits.

Milk-Related Words

To help you come up with your own milk puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

milk, cow, udder, dairy, litre, pint, skim, full, cream, full cream, whole, hi-lo, lowfat, pasteurised, homogenised, UHT, lactose, farm, chocolate, strawberry, banana, milkshake, kefir, soy, almond, coconut, hazelnut, macadamia, rice, oat, leche, lait, rotten, spoiled, expired, lactate, evaporated, condensed, sour, mylk, goat, sheep, yak, buffalo, curdled, casein, breast

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you find the milk-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments below! Are you looking for word play for text messages, Facebook, Twitter or some other social media platform? Would you like to see some funny milk pun pictures? Or perhaps you just want more milk puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’ve got any milk puns (image or text) that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia! 🙂✨🌱

Beer Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on beer puns! 🍻 🍺 Whether you need a name for your latest craft brew, a tagline for your beer-related business, a beer pun team name, or just some beer puns for their own sake, I hope you find this entry useful!

There’s a lot of depth to beer culture and so some of the puns in this entry may go over your head if you’re not a brewer or beer fanatic. I’ve tried to order the pun list so that it starts with general beer puns that most people will understand, and then as you go down the puns should get more obscure. That said, I have not done a perfect job of it, so apologies if there are some confusing ones here and there near the top.

A quick side note: Drinking alcohol gives your brain a reward that it didn’t earn. If you drink too often then your brain learns that the best (easiest) way to feel good is to drink more alcohol, rather than do the normal things that make you feel good (work hard, accomplish things, help others, etc.). Be careful messing with your neurotransmitters! 🙂

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on coffee puns, tea puns, party puns and food puns.

Beer Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about beer that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • All → Ale: As in “Ale in a day’s work.” and “She went ale out.” and “Ale’s well that ends well” and “It’s ale downhill from here.” and “It’s ale gone pear shaped.” and “It’s ale good.” and “It’s ale grist to the mill.” and “It’s ale me, me, me.” and “Not ale it’s cracked up to be.” and “That’s ale well and good”.
  • Stout: As in “He’s a stout young man.”
  • Larger → Lager: As in “Lager than life”.
  • Six-pack: As in “Check out my six-pack.”
  • Bar: As in “You’ve raised the bar.” and “Bar none.”
  • *pub*: If a word contains the “pub” sound (or similar) you may be able to make a terrible pub pun: capubility, capuble, palpuble, public, publicity, publication, publisher, republican, republic, unstoppuble, unpublishedinescapubly, hypubole, pubble (pebble).
  • You → Brew: As in “Brew can do it!” and “Brew silly goose!” and “I’m so glad to see brew!” and “Before brew know it”.
  • Bro → Brew: As in “What’s up, brew?” and “Cool story, brew.”
  • *brew*: If a word contains the “brew” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a brewing pun: brewmstick (broomstick), brews (bruise), brewnette (brunette), brewtal (brutal), brewtalize (brutalize), brewtish, (brutish), Hebrew.
  • *byoo*: If a word contains the “byoo” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a terrible beer brewing pun: brewtiful (beautiful), abrews (abuse), attribrewts (attributes), contribrewted, distribrewtion, rebrewke (rebuke), debrew (debut), retribrewtion, tribrewnal (tribunal).
  • *proo*: If a word contains the “proo” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a terrible brewing pun: abrewval (approval), bulletbrewf, dissabrewve, foolbrewf, imbrewvements, disbrewve, brewdent (prudent), brewdence (prudence), waterbrewf.
  • Déjà vu → Déjà brew: As in “I’m getting déjà brew – have we been to this pub before?”
  • Hop: As in “Just a hop, skip and jump.” and “Take 3 hops to the left.” and “Hop to it!” and “Bunny hop” and “Hip hop“.
  • Hope → Hop: As in “I have high hops.” and “A glimmer of hop.” and “Cross your fingers and hop for the best.” and “Keep hop alive.” and “There there’s life, there’s hop.” and “Cross my heart and hop to die.”
  • Hop*: If a word begins with the “hop” sound (or anything vaguely similar) then there may be an opportunity for a terrible beer pun: “Health, wealth and hoppiness.” and “Life, liberty and the pursuit of hoppiness.”  and “As it hoppens” and “Shit hoppens.” and “See what hoppens?” and “Hopatitis is an inflammation of the liver.”
  • Op* → Hop*: If a word begins with “op” it can often be turned into a silly hops pun: hopportunity, hoperation, hopposition, hopinion, hoption, hoperate, hopposite, hoperations, hoperating, hopportunities, hopera, hopponent, hoperator, hoppose, hoptions, hopposed, hopt, hoperated, hopinions, hoperational, hoptimism, hopponents, hoperates, hoperators, hoppression, hoptimistic, hoptional, hopposing, hoptical, hoptimal, hop, hoperative, hopted, hoptimum, hoppressive, hopenness, hopting, hoppressed, hopenings, hoperand, hopioid, hoptimist, hoptimise, hopaque, hoperatichopposites, hoptician, hopportunist, hoptic, hopposes, hoptimisation, hopacity, hoppress, hoperatives, hopine, hoptimality, hoptics, hoppressors, hoptimised, hopiate, hoptimists, hoptimistically, hoppressor, hopulence, hoptimize, hoppositions, hopportunistic, hopportunism, hopulent, hopportune.
  • *op* → *hop*: There are also quite a few words with the “op” sound (or similar) in them that can be turned into silly beer puns. There are a few here which have the full “hop” sound in them already. Here’s the list: acrhopolis, adhopt, adhopted, authopsy, bihopsy, bookshop, cohoperation, cohoperative, c-hop-yright, cr-hop, drhoplet, drhoppings, drhopped, flhoppy, eavesdrhopping, helic-hop-ter, imprhoper, imprhoperly, inapprhopiately, microschopic, monhopoly, philanthrhopic, photoc-hop-ier, p-hop-corn, p-hop-ularity, p-hop-ulation, prhopaganda, prhopagation, pr-hop-erly, p-hop-ulist, prhopositions, prhopped, p-hop-ulation, raindrhops, shopkeeper, st-hop, st-hop-er, synhopsis, tr-hop-ical, unst-hop-able, whopping.
  • Vain → Vine: As in “I worked so hard but it was all in vine.”
  • Vein → Vine: As in “My vines are bulging.” and “In the same vine …”
  • Fine → Vine: As in “It’s a vine day for a beer.” and “It’s a vine line.” and “You’re cutting it vine.” and “That’s a damn vine beer.” and “One vine day …” and “Treading a vine line.”
  • Van* → Vine*: As in, “Vine Gogh,” and “Vine-ish into thin air.” 
  • *ven* → *vine*: As in, “Sixes and sevines,” and “Blessed evine-t,” and “Break evine,” and “The elevineth hour,” and “Evine the score,” and “Heavine forbid,” and “A match made in heavine,” and “With a vine-geance,” and “Bun in the ovine,” and “Pure as the drivine snow,” and “Nothing vine-tured, nothing gained,” and “Revine-ge is a dish best served cold,” and “Innocent until provine guilty,” and “Lavineder (lavender) scented,” and “Twenty four sevine.”
  • *vin* → *vine*: As in, “Full of vinegar,” and “Get movine,” and “The gift that keeps on givine,” and “In livine memory,” and “In the drivine seat,” and “Knock the livine daylights out of,” and “Livine proof,” and “Livine on borrowed time,” and “Time flies when you’re havine fun,” and “Vinetage,” and “Vinedicate,” and “Vinedictive.”
  • Stain → Stein: As in “There’s a stein on your shirt.” (See beer stein)
  • Sign → Stein: As in “Give me a stein, lord!” and “Stein the pledge.” and “Stein up.” and “Stein of the times.” and “A sure stein.” and “A tell tale stein.” (See beer stein)
  • Sooner → Schooner: As in “Schooner or later.” and “The schooner the better.” and “No schooner said than done.” and “Schooner rather than later.” (A schooner is a type of glass cup.)
  • Tinkered → Tankard: As in “I tankard with this all day but I couldn’t get it working.” (A tankard is a big drinking vessel)
  • Sidle → Seidel: As in “I seideled up to her apologetically.”
  • Picture → Pitcher: As in “A pitcher is worth  thousand words.” and “See the big pitcher.” and “Motion pitcher.” and “Do I have to paint you a pitcher?” and “Pitcher perfect” (Pitcher is a synonym of “jug” – commonly used to serve beer.)
  • Pitcher: There is the potential for a pun here using the baseball meaning of this word.
  • Cling → Clink: As in “Clink on tight!”
  • Kink → Clink: As in “C’mon, be honest. Everyone has a clink or two.”
  • Blink → Clink: As in “In the clink of an eye.” and “Clink and you’ll miss it!”
  • Suds: This refers to the froth made from soap and water, but is also slang for “beer”. By using it in the original “soap and water” context you could potentially make a pun: “I got in the bath and sudsed up.” (Here we’re using the verb-form of “suds” with means “lather”)
  • Sides → Suds: As in “There are two suds to every question.” and “You’ve got to see the issue from both suds.”
  • Plastered: This means “very drunk”, but in the right context we could use its original definition as a pun: “The whole house is plastered.”
  • Wasted: As in “It’s so sad, seeing all these all wasted lives.” and “Youth is wasted on the young.”
  • Sloshed: Another one meaning “very drunk” – perhaps an opportunity to make a pun on its literal meaning: “We all sloshed around in the swimming pool for a while.”
  • Smashed, Hammered, Bombed, Legless, Messed up, Trousered, Trolleyed: Some more terms meaning “very drunk”. Each of them may have contexts in which there’s an opportunity to make a pun on its literal meaning – though these contexts may be quite specific.
  • Hang over → Hangover: As in “Mind if I hang over at your place this morning?”
  • Chug: As well as meaning “to drink fast or without pausing”, this term can refer to “The chug of a motor boat” or “The little train chugged up the hill.”
  • Hug → Chug: As in “Let’s have a group chug.” and “Chug it out.” and “Bro chug.”
  • Toast: When someone raises their beer in honour of something or someone and encourages everyone to do the same, that’s called a toast. There may be some context in which the other (normal) definition of “toast” could be punned upon.
  • Tears → Cheers: As in “Bored to cheers.” and “Burst into cheers.” and “Moved to cheers.” and “Reduced to cheers.” and “Fight back the cheers.” and “It will all end in cheers.” and “Blood, sweat and cheers.”
  • Cheers: This word also has the “the cheers of the crowd were deafening” definition which might be a viable opportunity for a pun in some contexts.
  • Tippy-toes → Tipsy-toes: As in “I snuck in on my tipsy-toes.”
  • Cough → Quaff: As in “I was quaffing all night, so I took the day off work.” (A “quaff” is an alcoholic drink and to “quaff” is to drink an alcoholic quickly or heartily)
  • Lick or → Liquor: As in “Are you going to have a liqu, or?” (Depending on your accent/pronunciation it may more like “lick her”. Please keep your puns respectful!)
  • Stubby: Refers to a beer bottle that is short and fat. This slang is taken directly from the actual definition of “stubby” so it’s an easy pun if the context is right.
  • Growler: A “growler” is a type of jug used to transport draft beer. The term has a bunch of other meanings which could be played upon in the right context.
  • Draught / Draft: Besides the beer-related meaning (beer served from barrel or tank), this term has several others: “He was drafted in 1942″ and “I drafted the letter of resignation.” and “The use of draft horses is outdated and cruel.” and “There was a nice draught coming through the window.” and “She was drafted for the national team at age 23.”
  • Dear → Beer: As in “Oh beer me” and “Hang on for beer life” and “Near and beer to my heart” and “Elementary, my beer Watson.”
  • Ear → Beer: As in “Grin from beer to beer.” and “Let’s play it by beer.” and “Lend a beer” and “In one beer and out the other.”
  • Peer → Beer: As in “Beer pressure” and “It’s like she was beering into my soul.”
  • Pier → Beer: As in “Take a long walk off a short beer.”
  • Bear → Beer: As in “Grizzly beer” and “Beer a resemblance” and “The right to beer arms” and “Beer down upon” and “Bear witness to …” and “Beer false witness” and “Beer fruit” and “Beer in mind that …” and “Bring to beer
  • Bare → Beer: As in “The beer necessities” and “Beer one’s teeth” and “Laid beer” and “The beer bones” and “The cupboard was beer
  • Buyer → Beer: As in “She’s a regular beer at our shop.” (Bit of a stretch!)
  • Beard → Beerd: As in “Neck beerd” and “His beerd was as white as snow.”
  • *ber* → *beer*: Words that contains the “ber” sound (or similar) are often opportunities for terrible beer puns: collabeerate, dismembeermentbeereavement, beereaved, beerds (birds), beerthplace (birthplace), beerglary (burglary), beergeoning (burgeoning), cumbeersome, delibeeration, decembeer, cucumbeer, exubeerant, libeerties (liberties), libeerals, libeertarian, libeeration, novembeer, numbeers, pubeerty, membeership, reimbeers (reimburse), remembeer, reverbeeration, robbeeries, robbeery, slumbeer, sobeer (sober).
  • Be* → Beer*: More terrible beer puns can be made using words that start with the “be” sound: beerwilderment, beerlongings, beerbliography, beerseiged, beerstowed, beermused, beerwitched, beergotry, beertersweetbeerllionair.
  • *pear* → *beer*: As in, “A beerlescent (pearlescent) glow” and “Abeer (appear) from thin air” and “Watch me disabeer” and “Make an abeerance.” Other words you could use: s’beerhead (spearhead), re-abeer (reappear).
  • Shakespeare → Shakesbeer
  • Pier → Beer: As in “Take a long walk off a short beer” and “Ear beercing” and “Never been habbeer (happier).”
  • Bare → Beer: As in “The beer necessities” and “Beer one’s teeth” and “Laid beer” and “The beer bones” and “The cupboard was beer“. You can also replace the “bare” in these words: barely (“beerly there”), threadbare (“A threadbeer toy”), cabaret (cabeeret), barefoot (beerfoot).
  • *bier* → *beer*: As in, grubbeer (grubbier), stubbeer (stubbier), tubbeer, scabbeer and chubbeer.
  • *pare* → *beer*: As in, “Beerent-teacher meeting” and “In beerenthesis” and “Like combeering apples and oranges” and “Be prebeered (prepared)” and “Abbeerently (apparently) so.” Other words you could use: abbeerel (apparel) and transbeerent (transparent).
  • *bar* → *beer*: As in, “Beer none” and “Behind beers” and “Language beerier” and “Raise the beer” and “Beerrelling (barreling) in” and “Beergain basement.” Other words you could use: beeren (barren), beerista (barista) and sidebeer (sidebar).
  • *ber* → *beer*: As in, “Strawbeery flavoured” and “Going beerserk” and “Got your numbeer” and “Sobeer up (this one’s a bit ironic)” and “A membeer of..” Other words you could use: beereft (bereft), beerate (berate), beerth (berth), beereavement (bereavement), chambeer (chamber), ambeer (amber), membeer, cybeer, remembeer, delibeerate, libeeral, libeerty, abeerration (aberration) and cumbeersome. Notes: to be bereft is to be deprived of something.
  • *bir* → *beer*: As in, “A little beerd told me” and “Beerthday suit” and “The early beerd.”
  • *bor* → *beer*: As in, “Beered out of your mind” and “Labeer of love” and “Harbeer a grudge” and “Good neighbeers” and “Please elabeerate” and “Collabeerate with.”
  • *bur* → *beer*: As in, “A heavy beerden.” Other words you could use: beereaucracy (bureaucracy), beergeoning (burgeoning) and excalibeer (excalibur).
  • *per* → *beer*: As in, “A different beerspective” and “Third beerson” and “Motivation and beerseverance.” Other words you could use: beertinent (pertinent), beeriod (period), beerception (perception), beernicious (pernicious), beercieve (perceive), beerformance (performance), beerfect (perfect), imbeerative (imperative) and obeeration (operation).
  • Egs* → Kegs*: Some words which start with the “egs” sound (or similar) can be turned into very bad beer puns: kegs-istence (existence), kegs-iled (exiled), kegs-istential (existential), kegs-it (exit).
  • Tap: This has at least two beer-related meanings: “to tap a barrel” and “what’s on tap?”. It also has several non-beer related meanings which might be pun opportunities in the right context: “He tapped the window gently.” and “We’ve tapped all his phone calls.”
  • Head: The “head” is the frothy foam on top of a beer. Potential puns about: “Air head” and “Don’t mess with my head.” and “Above my head” and “Over my head” and “Bite someone’s head off” and “Be it on your head” and “Couldn’t make head or tail of it” and “It’ll do your head in” and “Get it into your head” and “Get your head together” and “Got your head screwed on” and “Hanging over your head” and “You need to get your head examined.” and “Head and shoulders above the rest” and “Head count” and “Head honcho” and “Head in the sand” and “Head to head” and “Hit the nail on the head” and “I could do that standing on my head” and “Head wind” and “Hold a gun to his head” and “In over your head” and “Laugh your head off” and “Level-headed” and “Lose your head” and “Make your head spin” and “Price on his head” and “Pull your head in” and “Sleepy head” and “Upon your head be it”.
  • Bruise → Booze: As in, “A boozed ego” and “You can’t protect your kids from every bump and booze.”
  • *bas* → *booze*: As in, “On a first-name boozeis (basis)” and “Back to boozeics (basics)” and “Yes, boozeically” and “The boozelisk in the Chamber of Secrets (I’m sure many people will find ways to make boozy pickup lines out of this one…so use it and similar puns with your best judgement).”
  • *bes* → *booze*: As in, “All the boozet (best)” and “Boozet (best) friends forever” and “Boozet of all” and “Boozepoke suit” and “Boozetow your wisdom” and “Sit boozeside me.” Other words you could use: booze-seech (beseech), booze-sotted (besotted), booze-siege (besiege). Notes: to beseech is to beg.
  • *bos* → *booze*: As in, booze-om (bosom), rooibooze (rooibos) and verbooze (verbose). Note: rooibos is a type of tea.
  • *bus* → *booze*: As in, “Thrown under the booze” and “Walk or take the booze” and “None of your boozeiness” and “Boozey bee” and “Course syllabooze.” Other words you could use: nimbooze (nimbus), omnibooze (omnibus) and abooze (abuse). Notes: a nimbus is a circle of light, or a halo.
  • *baz* → *booze*: As in, boozear (bazaar), booze-ooka (bazooka), booze-illion (bazillion).
  • *biz* → *booze*: As in, “Boozear (bizarre) circumstances,” and “That’s showbooze.”
  • *buz* → *booze*: As in, “Booze me in” and “Booze off” and “Booze-ing with excitement” and “Boozewords.” Other words you could use: booze-ard (buzzard), booze-ing (boozing) and boozer (buzzer).
  • *bows* → *booze*: As in, “Chasing rainbooze” and “Rainbooze and unicorns” and “Rub elbooze with.”
  • *eth’ll → *ethyl: “Ethyl” alcohol is the type of alcohol that is in alcoholic beverages like beer. Pun examples: “My brethyl smell really bad if I drink this.” and “At least my dethyl go down in history.”
  • Moult → Malt: As in “I started malting as I got older.”
  • Mould → Malt: As in “There’s malt all over my food!” and “Malty sandwiches don’t taste great.”
  • Tiny → Tinnie / Tinny: As in “The patter of tinny feet.” (“Tinny” is slang for a can of beer)
  • Krikey! → Krieky!: As in “Krieky! That’s a big croc!”
  • Coarse / course → Coors: As in “Of coors!” and “Off coors” and “University coors” and “Blown off coors” and “Crash coors” and “In due coors” and “Let nature take its coors” and “On a collision coors” and “Stay on coors” and “He had a coors voice from drinking too much.”
  • Bro, my → Brah, ma: As in “Brah, ma beer puns are great, hey?” (Brahma is a beer brand)
  • Heinie can → Heineken: As in “Get off your heineken you? We’ve got work to do!” (“Heinie” is slang for bottom)
  • Bud wiser → Budweiser: As in “I’ve got a budweiser than all you uneducated chumps.”
  • Wiser → Weiser: As in “None the weiser” and “Older and weiser
  • Bud: As in “We’re best buds” and “Nip in the bud
  • Too bored → Tuborg: As in “I didn’t stay at the party long – I was Tuborg.”
  • Leffe → Left: Note that “Leffe” has two pronunciations. The French pronunciation sounds like “leff” and the Flemish pronunciation sounds like “leffer”. Here we’re punning with the French pronunciation. Examples: “Exist stage Leffe” and “Keep Leffe” and “Leffe for dead” and “Leffe in the lurch” and “Leffe out in the cold” and “Leffe wing” and “Leffe to your own devices” and “Out of Leffe field”.
  • Leave her → Leffe: (Here we’re using the Flemish pronunciation, see above) As in “Leffe alone!” and “Are you going to Leffe anything in your will?”
  • A lesion → Elysian: As in “What happened to your leg? Is that Elysian?”
  • A legion → Elysian: As in “She has Elysian of fans following her wherever she goes.”
  • Stellar → Stella: As in “A Stella cast has been assembled.” and “The pub received Stella ratings in the guides.” (Wikipedia)
  • Bass: This refers to the famous brewery. If you’re punning with text (rather than speaking it out loud), you can play on the audio-meaning of “bass”: “I like clubs that have good Bass.” but since this has a different pronunciation, the only exact phonetic pun is on the fish of the same name.
  • Basically → Bassically: As in “I drink Bassically the same thing all the time.”
  • Millimeter → Millermeter: As in “A millermeter more and it would have been long enough!” We can do the same thing with other units of measurement too: “The can holds 375 millerliters.” and “We just needed one millersecond longer!” and “This cable is rated to 25 millervolts.” and “A millergram of this is enough to kill a person.”
  • Million → Milleron: As in “Not in a miller-on years.” and “One in a milleron.”
  • Meantime: As in “In the meantime, we should look for a new place.” (Meantime is a brewery)
  • Foster: As in “Foster a sense of confidence in the people.” and “A bar owner must Foster a happy, friendly atmosphere.” (Foster’s is a beer company)
  • Four peeks → Four Peaks: As in “It took me about four peaks to finally read the text.”
  • For Pete’s → Four Peak’s: As in “Four peak’s sake!”
  • Car owner → Corona: As in “All coronas must pay annual car registration fees.”
  • “Youngling” → Yuengling: As in “Youth is wasted on yuenglings” and “He’s a yuengling at heart.”
  • Pills → Pils: As in “I had to pop some pils to help with this headache.”
  • Pills and → Pilsen: As in “Pilsen booze are a fast track to a ruined life.” and “It’s up to parents to keep their kids away from pilsen booze.”
  • Back’s → Beck’s: As in “My beck’s really sort today for some reason.” and “Ow! My beck!”
  • Slits → Schlitz: As in “The surgeon has to make two schlitz in the intestinal wall.”
  • Shits → Schlitz: As in “He did it for schlitz and giggles.” and “You know what gives me the schiltz?”
  • Bitter: As in “He came to a bitter end.” and “That’s a bitter pill to swallow.” and “No need to be bitter! (resentful)”
  • Least→ Yeast: As in “Last, but not yeast.” and “Yeast common denominator.” and “It’s the yeast I could do.”
  • East→ Yeast: As in “I’m heading over yeast for a holiday.”
  • Grain: As in “I’m going to go against the grain here and say …” and “There’s a grain of truth in what he’s saying.” and “I’d take it with a grain of salt.”
  • Grainy: Other than referring to grain (some varieties of which are used to make beer), this can refer to a texture or to a low resolution photograph: “Your profile picture is a bit grainy.”
  • Ingrained: As in “It was ingrained in me from a young age.”
  • Again → A grain: As in “Come a grain?” and “Never a grain.” and “Time and time a grain.” and “Now and a grain.”
  • Wait → Wheat: As in “Wheat a second…” and “I am lying in wheat.” and “Wheat and see.” (See wheat beer)
  • We t* → Wheat: As in “Wheat talked about this last night.” and “Wheat took our time.”
  • We’d → Wheat: As in “Wheat love for you to join us!”
  • What → Wheat: As in “Wheatever, man.” and “Wheat are you up to today?”
  • Why → Rye: “Rye do you ask?” and “Rye do beer puns make me giggle?” and “Rye hast thou forsaken me?” and “Rye are you doing this to me?”
  • Wry → Rye: “A rye smile.” and “With rye Scottish wit.” (Rye is a type of grain used to make beer)
  • Rye: Words that contain the “rye” sound can be made into terribly silly beer puns (Since some beers are made with rye): alryete, bryete, Brydal, b-rye-testcircumscryebed, compryesed, contryeved, copyryete, cryesis, cryeterion, cryeme, dryevers, descryebe, enterpryese, depryeved, fryeday, fryed, fryetened, pryeceless, pryemarily, pryevacy, pryeority, pryez, ryenocerous, ryeteous, ryetfully, ryevalries, samurye, subscryebed, surpryesingly, tryeangle, ryeting, tryeumph, rye-fle.
  • Riled up→ Rye-led up: As in “Jeez, calm down. No need to get rye-led up!”
  • Barely → Barley: As in “I’m barley getting by.” and “That barley passes as a beer pun.”
  • Ought → Oat: As in “You oat to say sorry.” and “Five minutes oat to be enough time.”
  • Its / It’s → Oats / Oat’s: As in “Oat’s just a matter of time.” and “Oat’s a shame.” and “Oat’s nothing personal” and “Oat’s worth oats weight in gold.” and “Takes oats toll.” and “A life of oats own.”
  • Sore gum → Sorghum: As in “I’ve got sorgums because my toothbrush bristles are too hard.” (Sorghum is a grain crop often used to create alcoholic beverages)
  • *sip*: If a word contains the “sip” sound, it’s an opportunity for a terrible pun on “sip” as in “to sip your beer” (so long as you emphasise the “sip” part somehow): Mississipi, disiplinarian, munisipality, presipitate, partisiples, presipitated, prinsipally, resipient, resiprocity.
  • *sep*: If a word contains the “sep” sound it’s a chance to make a terribly corny “sip” pun (perhaps emphasise with hyphens or underline/bold): ac-sip-tability (acceptability), bisips (biceps), consiption (conception), consipt (concept), desiptive, impersiptable, desiptive, misconsiption, persiptive, resiption, resiptionist, resiptivity, resiptors, siparatists (seperatists), siparation, siparate, susiptability, intersipt.
  • Dry: As in “These tea puns are very dry.” and “Dry humour” and “Hung out to dry” and “Keep your powder dry” and “As dry as dust”.
  • Will → Swill: As in “Against your own swill.” and “Bend to my swill” and “Love swill find a way.” and “Swill do.” and “Where there’s a swill, there’s a way.” and “Time swill tell.”
  • Back → Bock / Beck: As in “As soon as my bock is turned” and “At the bock of my mind” and “Bock to the Future” and “Bock from the dead” and “Bock in business” and “Bock in the day” and “Bock on your feet” and “He bocked out of the deal” and “Bock to bock” and “Cast your mind bock” and “Get off my bock” and “Fight bock the tears” and “Get bock on your feet” and “Get bock together” and “Hark bock to” and “Kick bock and enjoy” and “Laid bock” and “Money bock guarantee” and “On the bock burner” and “Never look bock” and “One step forward, two steps bock.” and “Put your bock into it!” and “Right bock at ya” and “Turn bock the clock” and “Watch your bock” and “You scratch my bock, I’ll scratch yours.” (Bock is a strong German lager, and the above examples can be replaced with “Beck” to play on the famous Beck’s brewery)
  • Back* → Bock* / Beck*: Words that begin with the “back” sound can also be silly beer puns: bockache, bockdrop, bockbone, bockground, bocklash, bocklog, bockside, bockroom, bockstage, bockward, bockyard, bockteria (bacteria), bockterium. (These examples can have “bock” replaced with “beck” to play on the famous Beck’s brewery)
  • Handy → Shandy: As in “This is a very shandy tool.”
  • Sandy → Shandy: As in “My towel is all shandy from the beach.”
  • Pass it → Posset: As in “Can you please posset over here?”
  • Spruce: As in “Make sure you leave some time to spruce yourself for the ball.” and “I’m all spruced up.” (See Spruce beer on Wikipedia)
  • Arrogant bastard: A simple pun on the brewing company.
  • I’m a real oldy → Amarilloldy: As in “Amarillo-ldy when it comes to my taste in beer.”
  • Citra → Sit ya: As in “Citra ass down!” – The name of a brew from Against the Grain. “Citra” is a variety of hops.
  • Nugget: As in “Nugget of wisdom” and “Nugget of truth” (Nugget is a hop variety)
  • Soz → Saaz: As in “Oh saaz! I didn’t mean to!”
  • Sim card → Simcoed: As in “I lost my phone so I need a new simcoed
  • Put her → Porter: As in “Porter down!” and “She porter hand to learning coding in her spare time.”
  • Fruity: Other than referring to the fruity taste or aroma of a brew, this term also has several slang definitions including being flamboyant or “bouncy”. It may also refer to someone who is considered crazy in some respect.
  • Noble: As in “That was very noble of you.” and “The four noble truths.” (“Noble hops” are traditionally hops which are low in bitterness and high in aroma, like Saaz)
  • Great → Gruit: As in “All creatures gruit and small.” and “I went to gruit lengths” and “Gruit minds think alike” and “The gruit outdoors” and “No challenge too gruit.” (Very corny! Gruit is an old-fashined herb mixture used for bittering and flavouring beer)
  • Asked → Oast: As in “Frequently oast questions” and “No questions oast” and “I took my harp to the party but no one oast me to play.”
  • Killin’ → Kiln: As in “She’s making a kiln!” and “Stop it, you’re kiln me!”
  • Nipple → Tipple: A tipple can refer to an alcoholic drink, or as a verb to “drink alcohol, especially habitually”.
  • Long neck → Longneck: A longneck is a common type of beer bottle.
  • Mouth feel → Mouthfeel: As in “It makes my mouthfeel funny, but it’s not too bad.” (See Wikipedia entry, Mouthfeel)
  • After taste → Aftertaste: As in “Aftertasting that beer, I’m not going back for seconds.” (See Wikipedia entry, Aftertaste)
  • Stupid → Stube-d: As in “Keep it simple, stube-d” and “Terminally stube-d” and “There’s no such thing as a stube-d question.”
  • Hey for → Hefe: As in “Hefe god’s sake could you cut it out?” (“Hefe” means “yeast” in German and sounds like “hay-fa”)
  • Goes up → Gose-p: As in “Right before it gose-p in flames.”
  • Say, son → Saison: As in “Saison, could you fetch me that spanner?”
  • Worth → Wort: As in “It’s wort it’s weight in gold.” and “For what it’s wort …” and “Get your money’s wort” and “Milk it for all it’s wort” and “Not wort a hill of beans” and “That’s my two cents wort
  • Ton / Tonne → Tun: As in “Came down like a tun of bricks.” and “That’s a tun of beer.”
  • Troop / Troupe → Trub: As in “A comedy trub is performing here tonight.” and “The trubs marched through the town.”
  • Least → Lees: As in “Last but not lees” and “Lees common denominator” and “Not in the lees” and “Line of lees resistance.”
  • Law to → Lauter: As in “There should be a lauter prevent people form making terrible beer puns.”
  • Lautering → Loitering: As in “There’s always a few shady people lautering around there at night.”
  • Spargin’ → Spare gin: As in “There wasn’t any spargin’ so I happily drank beer instead”
  • Tanning → Tannin: As in “Welcome to my tannin salon.”
  • For men t* → Ferment: As in “What we need is fermen to realise that catcalling isn’t friendly.”

Beer-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to beer can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the beer themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • (h)opposites attract
  • process of eliminating (h)options
  • a golden (h)opportunity
  • once in a lifetime (h)opportunity
  • window of (h)opportunity
  • contrary to popular (h)opinion
  • Adam’s ale
  • amber nectar
  • as drunk as a lord
  • as drunk as a skunk
  • as mild as milk
  • barrel of laughs
  • came to a bitter end
  • take the bitter with sweet
  • a bitter pill to swallow
  • bring out your best (a Bud Light slogan)
  • crack a tinnie
  • crack/bust some suds
  • slam a drink
  • drink like a fish
  • driven to drink
  • drink up
  • drink someone under the table
  • full of hops
  • given to drink
  • life’s not all beer and skittles
  • pint sized
  • on the piss
  • rolling drunk
  • six pack
  • slave to drink
  • stout fellow
  • you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make her drink
  • slam some beers
  • egg in your beer
  • small beer
  • knock one back
  • social drinker
  • bottoms up!
  • here’s to [someone/something]!
  • drink to excess
  • drown your sorrows
  • on a bender
  • on the rocks
  • make it a double
  • down the hatch
  • hair of the dog
  • happy hour
  • liquid courage
  • pub crawl
  • another round
  • two/three/four sheets in the wind
  • under full sail
  • under the influence
  • take the edge off
  • chin chin! (cheers!)
  • off their head
  • roll out the barrel
  • BYOB
  • on tap
  • Dutch courage
  • sudsing up
  • beer belly
  • trouble is brewing
  • a hop, skip and a jump
  • hip hop
  • clouded judgement
  • get you over a barrel
  • seperate the wheat from the chaff
  • barrel of laughs
  • belt down some liquor
  • as slow as molasses in january
  • cakes and ale
  • eat, drink and be merry
  • full head of steam
  • head in the clouds
  • hit the nail on the head
  • i’d lose my head if it wasn’t attached
  • i need it like a hole in the head
  • in over your head
  • my head is swimming
  • off the top of my head
  • off with his head
  • put a price on his head
  • two heads are better than one
  • keep your head above water
  • it’s all grist to the mill
  • walk like a drunken sailor

Beer-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of beer-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

brew, brewery, brewski, stein, schooner, tankard, seidel, pitcher, clink, suds, plastered, wasted, sloshed, smashed, hammered, bombed, messed up, hangover, hungover, chug, chugalug, sober, toast, cheers, drunkard, drunk, drunkenness, legless, tipsy, blotto, trousered, trolleyed, inebriated, quaff, sip, numb, corked, stubby, stubbies, ale, cask, cask ale, growler, draught beer, draft beer, draft, draught, keg, nitrokeg, tap, beer tap, head, prohibition, alcohol, alcoholic, alcoholism, ethyl alcohol, malt, hops, noble hops, beverage, liquor, liqueur, pub crawl, drink, wheat, rye, sorghum, barley, oats, millet, brewpub, rotgut, hooch, alcopop, tipple, tippler, intoxication, homebrew, beery, long neck, mouthfeel, aftertaste, imbibe, pub, bar, saloon, brasserie, vine, six-pack, tinnie, chaser, rathskeller, cellar, porter, cerveza, froth, frothie, coldie, swill, alehouse, stube, biergarten, beer garden, Oktoberfest, barrel, full-bodied, thin-bodied, publican, yeast, Ninkasi, palate, punt, chill, binge

bock, maibock, doppelbock, eisbock, weizenbock, altbier, berliner weisse, dortmunder export, dunkel, gose, helles, kellerbier, kolsch, marzen, pale lager, roggenbier, schwarzbier, smoked beer, wheat beer, zoigl, dubbel, Flanders red ale, lambicger, framboise, gueuze, kriek, oud bruin, quadrupel, saison, tripel, witbier, brown ale, Indian pale ale, mild ale, old ale, porter, Scotch ale, stout, amber ale, American pale ale, American wild ale, cream ale, ice lager, Kentucky common beer, pumpkin ale, steam beer, baltic porter, biere de garde, copper ale, corn beer, grodziskie, gratzer, hard soda, Irish red ale, light beer, malt beer, millet beer, pale ale, pilsner, rye beer, sahti, small beer, sour beer, Vienna lager, trappist, sommelier, root beer, apple beer, birch beer, ginger beer, horehound beer, oatmeal stout, sake, shandy, brown ale, posset, schankbier, spruce beer, weissbier, weizen beer, hefe, hefeweizen, Lowenbrau, Hamm, Arrogant Bastard, Fat Tire, Haffenreffer, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Nastro Azzurro

amarillo, cascade, centennial, chinook, citra, crystal, CTZ, fuggle, Golding, lambic, magnum, mosaic, Mt. Hood, Northern Brewer, nugget, Perle, Saaz, Simcoe, Tardif De Bourgogne, Williamette, cluster

Coors, Brahma, Harbin, Heineken, Yanjing, Skol, Budweiser, Bud, Bud Light, Tsingtao, Snow, Carlsberg, Tuborg, Leffe, Elysian, Stella Artois, Bass, Miller, Peroni, Meantime, Radegast, Foster’s, Molson Coors, Labatt, Bintang, Goose Island, Tecate, Amstel, Birra Moretti, Four Peaks, Kronenbourg 1664, Corona, Sam Adams, Guinness, Yuengling, Efes Pilsen, Dogfish Head, San Miguel, Becks, Heady Topper, Kingfisher, Harveys, Hoegaarden, Dos Equis, Sierra Nevada, Theakston, Mikkeller, Schlitz

steep, wort, mashout, lautering, lauter, lauter tun, mash tun, tun, mash, ferment, fermentation, turbidimeter, nephelometer, sparge, sparging, tannin, pH, chaff, husk, starch, starches, sugar, enzymes, dry hopping, sprouted, molasses, carbon dioxide, carbonation, grist, gluten, microbrewery, kegger, barm, leavening, barrelage, all-malt, amber, anaerobic, black malt, bung, caramel, dextrin, ester, filter, fining, malt-extract, priming, tart, milling, nitrogen, phenols, gruit, mugwort, oast house, kiln

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you find the beer-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments, below! Are you looking for puns for text messages, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or some other social media platform? Would you like to see some funny beer pun images? Or perhaps you just want more beer puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’re got any beer puns that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂

Tea Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on tea puns! ☕ 🍵 Tea puns sit a few steps under coffee puns in terms of popularity, and are a little more “obscure” thanks to the depth of tea culture and the many unusual foreign (usually Asian) names of the different tea varieties.

There are a bunch of “entry-level” tea puns, and of course these mostly revolve around the word “tea” itself (positivi-tea, socie-tea, communi-tea, etc.). If you scroll lower in the puns list you’ll get to the more esoteric tea puns that might require knowledge of some lesser known tea terminology.

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on coffee puns and food puns.

Tea Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about tea that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Step → Steep: As in “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single steep.” and “That was a steep too far.” and “Stay one steep ahead.” and “One steep forward, two steeps back.” and “You’ve got a spring in your steep.” and “Steep by steep.” and “One steep at a time.” and “Don’t steep out of line.” and “Steep on the gas!” and “He steeped down from the position.” and “Watch your steep!”
  • Sleep → Steep: As in “It’s fine to steep together on the first date.” and “And miles to go before I steep.” and “Beauty steep.” and “Don’t lose steep over it.” and “Goodnight, steep tight.” and “I could do it in my steep.” and “Steep with one eye open” and “Steep like a baby.”
  • Steep: As in “Tea culture has a steep learning curve.” and “This hill is steep.” and “Seventy dollars?! That’s a bit steep [expensive] isn’t it?” and “Calling me boring? That’s a bit steep [unfair]!”
  • Steeped: As in “Steeped in irony.” and “The university is steeped in tradition.” and “She steeped herself in the autobiographies of great mathematicians.”
  • Try → Chai: As in “Let me give this a chai…” and “Don’t chai this at home.” and “Nice chai.” and “Chai your luck/hand” and “You’ve seen the rest, now chai the best!” and “Don’t chai run before you can walk.” and “Chai and chai again.”
  • You → Brew: As in “Brew can do it!” and “Brew silly goose!” and “I’m so glad to see brew!” and “Before brew know it”
  • Bro → Brew: As in “What’s up, brew?” and “Cool story, brew.”
  • *brew*: If a word contains the “brew” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a brewing pun: brewmstick (broomstick), brews (bruise), brewnette (brunette), brewtal (brutal), brewtalize (brutalize), brewtish, (brutish), Hebrew.
  • *byoo*: If a word contains the “byoo” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a terrible tea brewing pun: brewtiful (beautiful), abrews (abuse), attribrewts (attributes), contribrewted, distribrewtion, rebrewke (rebuke), debrew (debut), retribrewtion, tribrewnal (tribunal).
  • Beautiful → Brew-tea-ful: As in “The start of a brew-tea-ful friendship.”
  • *proo*: If a word contains the “proo” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a terrible brewing pun: abrewval (approval), bulletbrewf, dissabrewve, foolbrewf, imbrewvements, disbrewve, brewdent (prudent), brewdence (prudence), waterbrewf.
  • Déjà vu → Déjà brew: As in “I’m getting déjà brew – have we been to this cafe before?”
  • Tease → Teas: As in “You’re such a teas!” and “Stop teas-ing him – that’s not nice.” and “Teas the knots out.”
  • *ty → *-tea: If words end in “ty” you’ve got yourself an entry-level tea pun: par-tea, socie-teaci-tea, communi-tea, authori-tea, universi-tea, quali-tea, activi-tea, twen-tea, securi-tea, proper-tea, opportuni-tea, coun-tea, responsibili-tea, majori-tea, du-tea, abili-tea, difficul-tea, thir-tea, varie-tea, fif-tea, safe-tea, possibili-tea, reali-tea, for-tea, emp-tea, capaci-tea, facili-tea, pret-tea, trea-tea, six-tea, depu-tea, nine-tea, priori-tea, liabili-tea, beau-tea, eigh-tea, guil-tea, identi-tea, chari-tea, minori-tea, electrici-tea, seven-tea, quanti-tea, personali-tea, penal-tea, anxie-tea, uni-tea, dir-tea, plen-tea, uncertain-tea, mortali-tea, stabili-tea, equi-tea, pi-tea, flexibili-tea, productivi-tea, complexi-tea, necessi-tea, availabili-tea, nas-tea, disabili-tea, loyal-tea, densi-tea, probabili-tea, intensi-tea, liber-tea, sensitivi-tea, equali-tea, hostili-tea, pover-tea, enti-tea, facul-tea, integri-tea, mobili-tea, certain-tea, maturi-tea, diversi-tea, sexuali-tea, capabili-tea, continui-tea, digni-tea, utili-tea, morali-tea, publici-tea, similari-tea, accountabili-tea, casual-tea, commodi-tea, curiosi-tea, gravi-tea, sovereign-tea, inequali-tea, amnes-tea, clari-tea, inabili-tea, majes-tea, prosperi-tea, solidari-tea, migh-tea, ambigui-tea, simplici-tea, veloci-tea, hospitali-tea, locali-tea, profitabili-tea, nationali-tea, affini-tea, cruel-tea, dus-tea, pet-tea, reliabili-tea, superiori-tea, indemni-tea, hones-tea, materni-tea, naugh-tea, nobili-tea, populari-tea, proximi-tea, puri-tea, royal-tea, severi-tea, validi-tea, warran-tea, immuni-tea, fat-tea, fertili-tea, generosi-tea, homosexuali-tea, humani-tea, instabili-tea, rationali-tea, speciali-tea, vicini-tea, ameni-tea, celebri-tea, dynas-tea, formali-tea, novel-tea, vulnerabili-tea, abnormali-tea, antiqui-tea, compatibili-tea, credibili-tea, familiari-tea, felici-tea, objectivi-tea, specifici-tea, cavi-tea, rus-tea, austeri-tea, bat-tea, captivi-tea, creativi-tea, dei-tea, eterni-tea, individuali-tea, ingenui-tea, insecuri-tea, masculini-tea, mentali-tea, moderni-tea, pari-tea, tas-tea, trini-tea, uniformi-tea, vani-tea, variabili-tea, volatili-tea, wit-tea, confidentiali-tea, elastici-tea, impossibili-tea, rari-tea, regulari-tea, sensibili-tea, singulari-tea, subjectivi-tea, subtle-tea, absurdi-tea, accessibili-tea, acidi-tea, admiral-tea, aun-tea, brutali-tea, desirabili-tea, dispari-tea, eligibili-tea, feminini-tea, functionali-tea, generali-tea, has-tea, hef-tea, humidi-tea, infini-tea, legali-tea, liquidi-tea, lof-tea, mis-tea, modes-tea, motili-tea, multiplici-tea, normali-tea, originali-tea, propensi-tea, relativi-tea, sinceri-tea, stupidi-tea, thirs-tea, totali-tea, veri-tea, conformi-tea, divini-tea, ethnici-tea, faul-tea, feasibili-tea, fraterni-tea, hear-tea, irregulari-tea, jet-tea, multipar-tea, neutrali-tea, nut-tea, obsceni-tea, obscuri-tea, pie-tea, sure-tea, viabili-tea, visibili-tea, vitali-tea, actuali-tea, adversi-tea, almigh-tea, animosi-tea, annui-tea, applicabili-tea, ar-tea, atroci-tea, authentici-tea, boun-tea, centrali-tea, complici-tea, craf-tea, discontinui-tea, dishones-tea, durabili-tea, feroci-tea, frail-tea, fros-tea, frui-tea, futili-tea, grit-tea, heterogenei-tea, inevitabili-tea, inferiori-tea, insani-tea, kit-tea, morbidi-tea, permeabili-tea, plurali-tea, porosi-tea, practicali-tea, proprie-tea, radioactivi-tea, reciproci-tea, rigidi-tea, sal-tea, sancti-tea, scarci-tea, sensuali-tea, spirituali-tea, suitabili-tea, susceptibili-tea, swea-tea, toxici-tea, universali-tea, virgini-tea, viscosi-tea, weigh-tea, acceptabili-tea, anonymi-tea, boo-tea, dain-tea, dot-tea, eccentrici-tea, eventuali-tea, externali-tea, extremi-tea, fatali-tea, fideli-tea, humili-tea, immorali-tea, impuri-tea, incapaci-tea, incompatibili-tea, indigni-tea, lai-tea, oddi-tea, peculiari-tea, polari-tea, potentiali-tea, pot-tea, principali-tea, respectabili-tea, sani-tea, special-tea, technicali-tea, tranquilli-tea, acui-tea, adaptabili-tea, agili-tea, alkalini-tea, angioplas-tea, artificiali-tea, banali-tea, calami-tea, causali-tea, chat-tea, civili-tea, collectivi-tea, commonali-tea, conductivi-tea, connectivi-tea, criminali-tea, crus-tea, deformi-tea, depravi-tea, disuni-tea, domestici-tea, draugh-tea, duali-tea, duplici-tea, enmi-tea, enormi-tea, entire-tea, falsi-tea, festivi-tea, finali-tea, fluidi-tea, fragili-tea, frivoli-tea, gaie-tea, haugh-tea, homogenei-tea, hypersensitivi-tea, illegali-tea, immortali-tea, immunoreactivi-tea, impartiali-tea, improprie-tea, inactivi-tea, incongrui-tea, increduli-tea, infideli-tea, infirmi-tea, inflexibili-tea, iniqui-tea, insensitivi-tea, interci-tea, interoperabili-tea, invalidi-tea, irrationali-tea, irritabili-tea, knot-tea, longevi-tea, lucidi-tea, luminosi-tea, lus-tea, materiali-tea, mea-tea, mediocri-tea, monstrosi-tea, municipali-tea, mus-tea, mutuali-tea, naive-tea, negativi-tea, nif-tea, notorie-tea, obesi-tea, opaci-tea, particulari-tea, passivi-tea, perpetui-tea, perplexi-tea, perversi-tea, plausibili-tea, poli-tea, pomposi-tea, posteri-tea, proportionali-tea, puber-tea, put-tea, reactivi-tea, resistivi-tea, salini-tea, scan-tea, selectivi-tea, seniori-tea, sereni-tea, shan-tea, shif-tea, shit-tea, sociabili-tea, solemni-tea, solidi-tea, solubili-tea, soo-tea, spontanei-tea. If you need more, check out this list of words ending in “ty”.
  • *tea*: If a word contains the the “tea” sound (or similar) it can be turned into a simple tea pun: teadioustea-cher, tea-ching, tea-m, tease, tea-dium, tea-nager, tea-tering, tea-th, abducteas, absen-tea-ism, adoptea, an-tea-ter, an-tea (anti), an-tea-oxidant, an-tea-ques, appoin-tea, Argen-tea-na, an-tea-depressant, bou-tea-que, car-tea-sian, cri-tea-que, es-tea-m, emp-tea-ness, fa-tea-gue, fif-tea-n, four-tea-n, thir-tea-n, six-tea-n, seven-tea-n, eigh-tea-n, nine-tea-n, gen-tea-l, guaran-tea, La-tea-no, mar-tea-ni, mul-tea (multi), mul-tea-faceted, migh-tea-est, mul-tea-millionaire, mul-tea-tasking, os-tea-oporosis, pe-tea-t, quaran-tea-n, s-tea-p / steap, s-tea-l, Socra-teas, s-tea-my / steamy, s-tea-p, strip-tea-se, stra-tea-gically.
  • *tie* → *tea*: As in “Black tea” and “Equal opportuniteas” and “Necktea party” and “Tea the knot” and “Tea up the loose ends” and “Tea yourself in knots.”
  • To → Tea: As in, “An accident waiting tea happen” and “According tea” and “All dressed up and nowhere tea go” and “Not all it’s cracked up tea be.”
  • Too → Tea: As in, “About time tea” and “Never tea late to” and “You know tea much” and “Life’s tea short.”
  • *tee* → *tea*: As in, “To the teath” and “Smells like tean spirit” and “Teaming with energy” and “100% guarantea” and “Self-esteam.” Other words you could use: teanager (teenager), committea (committee), repartea (repartee), trustea, mentea, devotea, esteam (esteem), voluntear and cantean.
  • *tei* → *tea*: As in, “Protean shake” and “Frankenstean.”
  • *teo* → *tea*: As in, courteaous, righteaous, meteaor and oesteaoporosis.
  • *teu* → *tea*: As in, “An amateaur performance” and “Agent provocateaur.”
  • *tey* → *tea*: As in, “Okay then matea” and “A chocolatea taste.”
  • *tie* → *tea*: sortea (sortie), auntea (auntie), sweetea, sentea-ent (sentient), frontea-er (frontier), ameniteas, faciliteas.
  • Tiara → Tea-ara
  • *tyi* → *tea*: As in, “Partea-ing ’til morning” and “Emptea-ing your cup” and “A pitea-ing look.”
  • *dee → *tea: As in, “Party attenteas” and “The awar-teas (awardees) are…”
  • *deo* → *tea*: As in, “Vi-teao (video) star” and “A hitea-ous day” and “Opposing itea-ologies.”
  • *die* → *tea*: As in, “A captive autea-ence” and “Obetea-ent puppies.”
  • Tree → Tea: As in, “Can’t see the wood for the teas” and “Family tea.”
  • Procrastinating → Procaffeinating: As in “I should have been studying for the exam, but I was procaffeinating.”
  • Mug: This can be slang for “face” or for “attack or rob in a public place”. Examples: “I was mugged in broad daylight.” and “We have mug shots of this criminal back at the station.”
  • Strain: As in “I’m really straining to come up with these tea puns.” and “Don’t buckle under the strain.” and “Use proper lifting techniques – don’t strain your back.”
  • Sent → Scent: As in “Scent packing.” and “I’ve scent it by express, so it should arrive soon.” and “Heaven scent.”
  • Pot: As in “Pot luck” and “The melting pot” and “He’s a bit of a fuss pot.” and “A pot shot” and “A pot of gold”
  • Leave → Leaf: As in “Absent without leaf.” and “Leaf no stone unturned” and “Leaf your options open.” and “Love them and leaf them.” and “That’s going to leaf a mark!” and “I’m leafing tomorrow morning.”
  • Love → Leaf: As in “I leaf you so much!” and “Leaf is in the air.”
  • Laugh → Leaf: As in “Leaf all the way to the bank.” and “Leaf in your face.” and “Leaf your head off.”
  • Leaves: As in “She leaves without a trace.”
  • Blend: As in “Try to blend in.”
  • Bend → Blend: As in “Around the blend.” and “You need to blend the rules a little.” and “Blend to my will.”
  • Bitter: As in “He came to a bitter end.” and “That’s a bitter pill to swallow.” and “No need to be bitter! (resentful)”
  • Cop → Cup: As in “The cuppers pulled me over because of my broken tail light.” and “When I grow up I wanna be a cup so I can fight crime.”
  • Cup: This has a few different meaning outside of the normal one. The term “cup” is used in the measurement of bra sizes, and can be used as a verb for “form into the shape of a cup” (especially when referring to hands). These other definitions might be opportunities for subtle cup puns / tea puns.
  • Lukewarm: This means “lacking interest, enthusiasm or conviction” and also “mildly warm”. It’s often used to describe tea that isn’t hot enough. Examples: “A lukewarm applause” and “Your tea puns are lukewarm at best.”
  • Sentimental → Sedimental: As in “This antique tea pot has a lot of sedimental value.”
  • Above her age → A beverage: As in “Her reading skills are a beverage” and “She pitches a beverage – that’s why she got into the national team.” and “She’s a beverage group in all her subjects.”
  • Stimulate: As in “This was a stimulating discussion, but I need to go now.” and “The courses aim to stimulate a passion for learning.”
  • Milky: This means “weak and compliant”. Example: “They just talk that way to make you turn milky.”
  • Milk: This can mean “exploit” or “fleece” or “get all possible advantage from a situation”. For example: “The newspapers were milking the story for every possible drop of drama.” and “They milked me dry.” and “Milk it for all it’s worth.”
  • Sugar: This can be used as a replacement for “shit” as in “Oh sugar!”. It is also used as a term of endearment as in “How are you feeling, sugar?”
  • Fair tradeThis term refers to a social movement which seeks to help producers in developing countries and promote sustainable farming. It’s often used to refer to “fair trade tea”. We can use it as a tea pun fairly easily: “I’ll stop making tea puns, and you give me ten dollars. Is that a fair trade?”
  • *sip*: If a word contains the “sip” sound, it’s an opportunity for a terrible pun on “sip” as in “to sip your tea” (so long as you emphasise the “sip” part somehow): Mississipi, disiplinarian, munisipality, presipitate, partisiples, presipitated, prinsipally, resipient, resiprocity.
  • *sep*: If a word contains the “sep” sound it’s a chance to make a terribly corny “sip” pun (perhaps emphasise with hyphens or underline/bold): ac-sip-tability (acceptability), bisips (biceps), consiption (conception), consipt (concept), desiptive, impersiptable, desiptive, misconsiption, persiptive, resiption, resiptionist, resiptivity, resiptors, siparatists (seperatists), siparation, siparate, susiptability, intersipt.
  • They can’t → Decant: As in “They’re banned. Decant come back here.” and “Decant stop me. I can do anything.”
  • Earn → Urn: As in “I don’t urn much at the moment, but I’m working my way up.” and “You’ve urned it.” and “Urn an honest penny.” An “urn” in the context of tea is usually a large vessel which contains hot water and a tap to dispense it. The Russian samovar is an example, and the wall-mounted hot water “urns” in office break-rooms are another.
  • Mouldy → Malty: As in “Your tea puns are worse than malty sandwiches!”
  • Felt her → Filter: As in “I filter breathing down the back of my neck.” and “I filter gaze fall on me.”
  • Filled her → Filter: As in “She has filter tea pun quota for today.”
  • Plunge → Plunger: As in “Take the plunger!” and “She jumped form the jetty and plungered into the sea.” (A reference to “french presses” which are sometimes used for tea)
  • Settle → Kettle: As in “Kettle down everyone.” and “We should kettle this out of court.” and “I’ve got a score to kettle.” and “Never kettle for second best.”
  • Ready → Red tea: As in “I was born red tea.” and “Red tea, steady, go!” and “All fired up and red tea to go.”
  • Heard → Herb: As in “I herb it on the grape vine.” and “You herb it here first.” and “You could have herb a pin drop.”
  • Curb → Herb: As in “Herb your enthusiasm.” and “Drive up onto the herb.”
  • *erb* → *herb*: If a word contains the “herb” sound (or similar) a cringe-worthy herbal tea pun can sometimes be made: advherb, distherbance, distherbingly, exacherbate, aftherburner, countherbalance, hypherbole, knickherbockers, mastherbate, nonvherbal, refherbishment, rivherbankherbanization, vherbalize.
  • Refuse → Infuse: As in “I’m going to make him an offer he can’t infuse.”
  • Confuse → Infuse: As in: “I think you’ve infused me for someone else.”
  • Infuse: As in: “Her poetry is infused with an intense anger born of the oppression she experienced as a child.”
  • Flowery: As in: “The flowery prose doesn’t make up for a lack of substance.”
  • Died → Dried: As in: “Dried and gone to heaven.” and “I almost dried of laughter.” and “I’m drying!”
  • Dry: As in “These tea puns are very dry.” and “Dry humour” and “Hung out to dry” and “Keep your powder dry” and “As dry as dust”
  • Lip → Lipton: As in “This tea is hot! I just burned my Lipton on it.” and “Keep a stiff upper Lipton.” and “Pay Lipton service to”
  • Lining → Twining: As in “Every cloud has a silver Twining.”
  • Dill → Dilmah: As in “He’s a bit of a Dilmah.”
  • Until my (’til ma) → Dilmah: As in “Dilmah dying day.” and “It ain’t over Dilmah heart stops beating.”
  • Bag: As in “Bag a bargain.” and “It’s in the bag.” and “Let the cat out of the bag.” and “Douche bag” and “Body bag” and “Bag of tricks”
  • Heated / Cool down: As in “his discussion is getting quite heated. We all need to cool down and talk this through calmly.”
  • Along → Oolong: As in “Can I tag oolong?” and “Hurry/Run oolong now.” and “Mosey oolong.” and “Moving right oolong.” and “We get oolong fine.” and “I’m just oolong for the ride.”
  • A long → Oolong: As in “It’s been oolong time.” and “Take oolong walk along a short plank.” and “To cut oolong story short …” and “Not by oolong shot.”
  • Fruity: Other than referring to actual fruit, this term also has several slang definitions including being flamboyant or “bouncy”. It may also refer to someone who is considered crazy in some respect.
  • Honey: As in “Honey, do you know where my keys are?”
  • Shrug → Shrub: As in “Shrub your shoulders” and “Shrub it off.”
  • Darling → Darjeeling: As in “My darjeeling wife.” and “He is such a darjeeling!”
  • Burn a → Burma: As in “It’ll Burma hole in your pocket.” and “You’ll Burma lot of bridges if you do that.”
  • Ginger: As in “She slapped his hand lightly to ginger him up” (to make someone more lively) and “The cat’s fur was ginger with speckles of white.” and “I gingered up after having my morning tea.”
  • Gingerly: This means “in a careful or cautious manner”. As in “She gingerly turned the door nob.” and “Risking everything, I gingerly made one last tea pun.”
  • Poor → Pu’er / Pu-erh: As in “Dirt pu’er.” and “Pu-erh, but honest.” and “The rich get richer and the pu-erh get pu-erher.” and “A pu’er work-person blames their tools.”
  • Pour → Pu’er / Pu-erh: As in “Can you pu’er me a cup of that?” and “Raining and pu-erhing.”
  • Tightly → Tetley: As in “Hold on Tetley!”
  • Deadly → Tetley: As in “Assault with a Tetley weapon.” and “The seven Tetley sins.”
  • Saucy / Saucier → Saucer: This is a corny one. “Saucy” has different meanings in different places. Sometimes it has a sexual connotation, other times it means “cheeky”. You’ll have to construct your pun with the audience in mind.
  • D-cup → Teacup: As in “I lost a little weight and am now a teacup.”
  • Peek or → Pekoe: As in “Close your eyes… Don’t pekoe it’ll ruin the surprise!”
  • Peek-a-boo →Pekoe-boo
  • Some of our → Samovar: This refers to a highly decorated tea urn used in Russia. Examples: “Samovar best tea has come from this urn.” and “Samovar luggage was lost on the trip.”
  • So strong → Souchong: “Souchong” is pronounced “soo-shong” and is a fine black variety of China tea. As in “I couldn’t lift that – you’re souchong!” (The most terrible tea pun?)
  • Hi, son → Hyson: As in “Hyson, it’s me, your mother.”
  • Bore his → Boheas: As in “I didn’t want to boheas brains out with all my tea knowledge.” and “Boheas pants off”
  • Grey → Earl Grey: As in “Fifty Shades of Earl Grey” and “Where do you draw the line? It’s a bit of an Earl Grey area.” and “Men in Earl Grey suits”
  • Burger might→ Bergamot: This term’s English pronunciation sounds like “berga-mot” or “berga-met” (pretty much as it is spelt). Example: “What should we do for dinner? A bergamot be nice.”
  • Upon → Yaupon: As in “Once yaupon a time.” and “Cast your bread yaupon the waters.” and “I will wear my heart yaupon my sleeve.” and “Sorry, I didn’t mean to impose yaupon you all.” and “Yaupon your head be it.” and “Wish yaupon a star.”
  • Us and → Assam-d: As in “Don’t see it as Assam-d them” and “Help Assam-d we’ll help you.”
  • Bunch of → Bancha: As in “You’re a bancha fools!” and “I’ll get one bancha flowers thanks.”
  • Salon → Ceylon: As in “A hairdressing ceylon” and “Washington political ceylons
  • Sail on →Ceylon: As in “We had to ceylon through the storm.”
  • Doors → Dooars: As in “Behind closed Dooars” and “A degree with this university opens Dooars.”
  • Long chin → Longjing: Not sure if this one would ever be useful…
  • Baby lotion → Ba Bi Luo Chun: Another one of questionable utility.
  • Send your → Sencha: As in “Sencha mail by express if you want it to arrive by Wednesday.”
  • Bushels → Bushells: A “bushel” is a measurement for dry goods equal to about 35 litres (64 US pints), and “Bushells” is a well-known brand of Australia tea. A pun might be made here by replacing any usual unit of (volume or mass) measurement (litres, tonnes, barrels) with “Bushells”.
  • Loose: As in “All hell broke loose.” and “Cut loose” and “A loose end” and “Speaking loosely, …” and “Loose lips sink ships.”

Tea-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to tea can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the tea themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • not my cup of tea
  • tea and sympathy
  • that just about takes the biscuit
  • steeped in irony
  • different kettle of fish
  • the pot calling the kettle black
  • a watched pot never boils
  • between the cup and the lip
  • don’t cry over spilt milk
  • came to a bitter end
  • take the bitter with sweet
  • a bitter pill to swallow
  • in hot water
  • my cup runneth over
  • stir the pot
  • some pots you don’t stir
  • storm in a teacup
  • tempest in a teapot
  • not for all the tea in China
  • a storm is brewing
  • trouble is brewing
  • to a T
  • turn over a new leaf,
  • leaf through
  • buckle under the strain
  • strain every nerve
  • bag of tricks
  • it’s in the bag

Tea-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of tea-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

brew, beverage, green tea, green, black, black tea, white tea, oolong, drink, tea leaf, caffeine, herbal tea, afternoon tea, iced tea, shrub, darjeeling tea, pot, tea time, chamomile / camomile, rooibos, camellia, chicory, cuppa, burma, sichuan, chai, tipple, teapot, ginger, pu-erh, puer, Nepal, India, theophylline, Tetley, astringent, lemon, saucer, teacup, cup, breakfast, spices, sugar, milk, milky, urn, pekoe, teahouse, samovar, teaspoon, souchong, hyson, bohea, tea party, tea bag, tea garden, tea tray, theine, earl grey, darjeeling, kettle, creamer, tea cloth, continental breakfast, camellia, infuse, infusion, infuser, tea set, kombucha, steep, high tea, decaffeinated, yaupon, assam, aroma, bancha, ceylon, dooar, English breakfast, fermentation, formosa, gyokuro, Hyson, I-Chiban Cha, imperial tea, instant tea, Jasmine, Keemun, Lapsand Soucho, souchong, red tea, Russian caravan, sencha, scented, tannin, tarry, tisane, woody, ching wo, chunmee, congou, cream tea, dickoya, fannings, fruity, bitter, malty, flowery, Nilgiri, theanine, matcha, antioxidant, autumnal, Yorkshire, Lipton, Dilmah, Bushells, lemongrass, honeybush, yerba mate, traditional, vanilla, blend, Twinings, bag, loose, teaball, tea egg, strain, flowery, dried flowers, dried, dry, bergamot.

Tea Jokes

If you’re looking for some very corny tea jokes, you’ve come to the right place. All of these one-liner-style tea jokes use puns in their punchline. Some are phonetic puns, others are based on a slang phrase or cliche related to tea.

  • Why did Marx hate Earl Grey? – Because all proper tea is theft.
  • Why was the tea bag begging on the street? – Because it was puer.
  • What starts with t, ends with t, and is full of t? – A teapot!
  • What is a baby’s teapot favorite game? – Pekoe-boo
  • How long does it take to ship tea from Chinese? – Oolong time!
  • What type of tea to talkative people drink? – Chai tea
  • When should you avoid drinking a hot beverage? – When it’s not your cup of tea.
  • How does Moses make his tea? – Hebrews it.
  • Why do hipsters only drink iced tea? – Because ice was water before it was cool.
  • What does a teapot say to it’s lover? – O, dajarling!
  • What do you call a dentist who doesn’t like tea? – Denis.
  • Why did the hipster burn her tongue? – She drank her tea before it was cool.
  • Why did the teapot get in trouble? – Because it was naught-tea.
  • What kind of tea did the American colonists want? – Liberty
  • What does a teabag do when it’s tired? – It seeps.
  • What type of tea should you drink before a long desert journey? – Camel-mile tea.
  • What type of tea do politicians need to drink more of? – Honest-tea.

Tea Pun Images

Below is a collection of tea-related visual puns and meme-type images. If you’ve created your own visual tea puns or found one that we’ve missed, please post us a link in the comments section 🙂

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you find the tea-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments, below! Are you looking for puns for text messages, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or some other social media platform? Would you like to see more funny tea pun images? Or perhaps you just want more tea puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’re got any tea puns (image or text) that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂