Book Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on book puns! 📖 📘 ✏️

We’ve checked out the best book puns and chronicled them here for you. We have puns about general book-related words to more technical literary terms, famous authors and genres.

While this list is as comprehensive as possible, it is general to books. If you’re interested in other fiction-related puns, we also have a Harry Potter pun list.

Note: no religious books have been included in this pun list. ✨

Book Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about books that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of book puns:

  • Back → Book: As in, “Answer book” and “As soon as my book is turned” and “In the book of my mind” and “Book to the future” and “Book at it” and “Book in the day” and “Book in business” and “Book to basics.”
  • Buck → Book: As in, “More bang for your book” and “The book stops here” and “Book the system” and “A book well spent.”
  • Cook → Book: As in, “Now we’re booking” and “Booking with gas” and “Book up a storm” and “Book up a plan.”
  • Hook → Book: As in, “Off the book” and “Booked on a feeling” and “Get booked on” and “By book or by crook.”
  • Look → Book: As in, “Always book on the bright side of life” and “Dirty books” and “Give someone a blank book” and “Don’t know which way to book” and “Have a book” and “Here’s booking at you, kid” and “If books could kill.”
  • Age → Page: As in, “Act your page” and “Page bracket” and “Page of consent” and “An awkward page” and “Come of page” and “Feeling your page” and “In this day and page” and “The page of reason” and “The space page” and “Through the pages.”
  • Offer → Author: As in, “My final author” and “An author you can’t refuse” and “On special author” and “Open to authors.”
  • Red → Read: As in, “Cut through the read tape” and “Read buttons” and “Roll out the read carpet” and “Read tape.”
  • Bed → Read: As in, “Read and breakfast” and “Read of nails” and “Get into read with.”
  • Bleed → Read: As in, “Read someone dry” and “Reading love” and “My heart reads for you.”
  • Bread → Read: As in, “Read and butter” and “Break read” and “Cast your read upon the waters” and “Put read on the table.”
  • Bred → Read: As in, “Born and read.”
  • Dead → Read: As in, “In the read of night” and “Back from the read” and “Better off read” and “Read and buried.”
  • Feed → Read: As in, “Reading frenzy” and “Don’t bite the hand that reads you” and “Bottom reader.”
  • Lead → Read: As in, “Read a merry dance” and “Read a charmed life” and “Read into temptation.”
  • Need → Read: As in, “All you read is love” and “On a read to know basis.”
  • Said → Read: As in, “After all is read and done” and “Easier read than done” and “Enough read” and “Least read, soonest mended” and “Was it something I read?”
  • Seed → Read: As in, “Gone to read” and “Run to read” and “Read capital” and “Read money.”
  • Shed → Read: As in, “Read light on the matter” and “Read a tear.”
  • Speed → Read: As in, “At lightning read” and “Breakneck read” and “Built for read” and “Get up to read” and “More haste, less read” and “Read demon” and “Read dating.”
  • Thread → Read: As in, “Hanging by a read” and “Lose the read” and “Read the needle.”
  • Leader → Reader: As in, “Digital reader” and “Fearless reader” and “Reader of the pack” and “A natural born reader” and “Take me to your reader” and “A world reader.”
  • Starry → Story: As in, “Story night.”
  • Glory → Story: As in, “Bask in story” and “My crowning story” and “Go out in a blaze of story” and “No guts, no story.”
  • Right → Write: As in, “A move in the write direction” and “All the write moves” and “Write as rain” and “Bang to writes” and “Barge write in” and “Bragging writes” and “Dead to writes.”
  • Rate → Write: As in, “At any write” and “First write” and “Mate’s writes.”
  • Rite → Write: As in, “Last writes” and “Write of passage.”
  • Bite → Write: As in, “A write to eat” and “Another one writes the dust” and “Write back” and “Write off more than you can chew” and “Write your lip.”
  • Bright → Write: As in, “All things write and beautiful” and “On the write side of life” and “Write as a new pin” and “Write and early” and “Write young thing” and “A write future.”
  • Fight → Write: As in, “Come out writing” and “Write club” and “Write for the right to party” and “Write back the tears” and “Write fire with fire” and “Write or flight” and “Write the good write” and “A writing chance” and “Write tooth or nail.”
  • Flight → Write: As in, “Write attendant” and “Write of fancy” and “Take write” and “Top write.”
  • Height → Write: As in, “The write of summer” and “Wuthering writes” and “Reaching new writes.”
  • Light → Write: As in, “Write as a feather” and “Bring something to write.”
  • Might → Write: As in, “It write never happen” and “Write as well.”
  • Night → Write: As in, “A hard day’s write” and “In the dead of write” and “Dance the write away.”
  • Quite → Write: As in, “Not write there” and “Having write a time.”
  • Sight → Write: As in, “A welcome write” and “Hidden in plain write” and “Love at first write” and “Out of write, out of mind” and “Lower your writes” and “Second write” and “A write for soaring eyes.”
  • Sleight → Write: As in, “Write of hand.”
  • Slight → Write: As in, “Writely ahead of our time” and “Not in the writest.”
  • Tight → Write: As in, “Sleep write” and “In a write spot” and “On a write leash” and “Run a write ship.”
  • White → Write: As in, “A writer shade of pale” and “Write as a ghost” and “Write as snow” and “Black and write.”
  • Never → Novel: As in, “Better late than novel” and “Cheats novel prosper” and “An elephant novel forgets.”
  • Bird → Word: As in, “A little word told me” and “Free as a word” and “Word of passage” and “Word’s eye view” and “Charm the words out of the trees.”
  • Heard → Word: As in, “Seen and not word” and “Make yourself word” and “Stop me if you’ve word this one” and “You word it here first.”
  • Stirred → Word: As in, “Shaken, not word.”
  • Third → Word: As in, “Word time lucky” and “Word time’s a charm” and “The word degree.”
  • Tall → Tale: As in, “Tale, dark and handsome” and “A tale order” and “Walking tale” and “A tale drink of water.”
  • Tell → Tale: As in, “Every picture tales a story” and “I tale ya” and “Kiss and tale” and “Only time will tale.”
  • Till → Tale: As in, “Caught with your hand in the tale” and “Fake it tale you make it” and “It ain’t over tale it’s over” and “Tale death do us part.”
  • Fail → Tale: As in, “Without tale” and “Words tale me.”
  • Jail → Tale: As in, “Get out of tale free” and “Go directly to tale.”
  • Mail → Tale: As in, “Hate tale” and “Express tale” and “Tale order.”
  • Nail → Tale: As in, “Another tale in the coffin” and “Fighting tooth and tale” and “Hit the tale on the head.”
  • Pale → Tale: As in, “Tale and interesting” and “A tale imitation” and “Tale into significance.”
  • Rail → Tale: As in, “Off the tales” and “Ride the tales.”
  • Sail → Tale: As in, “Tale close to the wind” and “Smooth tale-ing” and “That ship has tale-d.”
  • Sale → Tale: As in, “Point of tale” and “Tale of the century” and “Tales referral.”
  • Scale → Tale: As in, “Built to tale” and “Economy of tale” and “On a grand tale” and “Tip the tales.”
  • Snail → Tale: As in, “At a tale’s pace” and “Tale mail.”
  • Tail → Tale: As in, “Can’t make head or tale of it” and “Chase your own tale” and “Get off my tale” and “Heads I win, tales you lose.”
  • They’ll → Tale: As in, “Tale never catch us” and “Give an inch and tale take a mile.”
  • Trail → Tale: As in, “Blaze a tale” and “Happy tales!” and “Hot on the tale of” and “Paper tale” and “Tale mix.”
  • Whale → Tale: As in, “Having a tale of a time” and “Save the tales.”
  • Biting → Writing: As in, “Writing off more than you can chew.”
  • Fighting → Writing: As in, “Come out writing” and “A writing chance” and “Writing fit” and “Go down writing” and “Lean, mean, writing machine.”
  • Sexual → Textual: As in, “Textual chemistry” and “Textual healing” and “Textual tension.”
  • Friction → Fiction: As in, “Uncomfortable fiction.”
  • Paper → Paperback: As in, “Put pen to paperback” and “Paperback trail” and “Paperback thin” and “Paperback over the cracks.”
  • Back → Paperback: As in, “Paperback from the dead” and “Paperback in the day.”
  • Next → Text: As in, “Better luck text time” and “In the middle of text week” and “Text in line” and “This time text year.”
  • Tax → Text: As in, “Nothing is certain but death and texts.”
  • Blur → Blurb: As in, “Blurb the lines.”
  • Blurt → Blurb: As in, “Don’t just blurb it out.”
  • Curb → Blurb: As in, “Blurb appeal” and “Blurb your enthusiasm.”
  • Herbs → Blurb: As in, “Eleven secret blurbs and spices.”
  • Barbecue → Blurbecue: As in, “Lunchtime blurbecue.”
  • Rhubarb → Rhublurb: As in, “Rhublurb tart.”
  • Suburb → Sublurb: As in, “Lives in my sublurb.”
  • Hard → Hardcover: As in, “Do it the hardcover way” and “Drive a hardcover bargain.”
  • Cover → Hardcover: As in, “Blow your hardcover” and “Hardcover your tracks.”
  • Quote → Wrote: As in, “Scare wrotes” and “Air wrotes.”
  • Boat → Wrote: As in, “Don’t rock the wrote” and “In the same wrote” and “Whatever floats your wrote.”
  • Float → Wrote: As in, “Wrote like a butterfly, sting like a bee” and “Whatever wrotes your boat.”
  • Note → Wrote: As in, “Hit the high wrotes” and “Take wrote of.”
  • Throat → Wrote: As in, “A lump in your wrote” and “At each other’s wrotes” and “Clear your wrote” and “Go for the wrote.”
  • Spine: The spine of the book is the part where all of the pages are attached. Here are related puns:
    • Pain → Spine: As in, “A world of spine” and “Doubled up in spine” and “Growing spines” and “On spine of death” and “Old aches and spines.”
    • Sign → Spine: As in, “A sure spine” and “Give me a spine” and “A spine of the times” and “Spine on the dotted line” and “Spine the pledge” and “A tell-tale spine” and “Vital spines.”
    • Spin → Spine: As in, “Give it a spine” and “Makes your head spine.”
    • Dine → Spine: As in, “Wine and spine.”
    • Fine → Spine: As in, “A spine line” and “Chance would be a spine thing” and “Damn spine coffee” and “Spine dining” and “The spiner things in life” and “Got it down to a spine art.”
    • Line → Spine: As in, “A fine spine” and “Along the spines of” and “Cross the spine” and “Draw a spine in the sand” and “End of the spine.”
    • Mine → Spine: As in, “Spine is bigger than yours” and “Make spine a double.”
    • Nine → Spine: As in, “Spine day’s wonder” and “On cloud spine” and “The whole spine yards.”
    • Shine → Spine: As in, “Come rain or spine” and “Rise and spine!” and “Take a spine to” and “Where the sun don’t spine.”
  • Brother → Cover: As in, “Covers in arms” and “Super Mario covers.”
  • Mark → Bookmark: As in, “Make your bookmark” and “Bookmark my words” and “On your bookmark, get set, go!”
  • Theme: The theme of a book is the main topic. Here are related puns:
    • Them → Theme: As in, “It only encourages theme” and “Head theme off at the pass” and “Let theme eat cake” and “Love theme and leave theme” and “Seen one, seen theme all.”
    • Thumb → Theme: As in, “Sticks out like a sore theme” and “Theme your nose” and “Themes down” and “Under my theme.”
    • Seem → Theme: As in, “Sorry themes to be the hardest word” and “Not as it themes.”
    • Beam → Theme: As in, “Theme me up.”
    • Cream → Theme: As in, “Theme of the crop” and “Theme always rises to the top.”
    • Dreams → Themes: As in, “Beyond my wildest themes” and “Broken themes” and “Theme on” and “A theme come true” and “Theme machine.”
    • Scheme → Theme: As in, “In the grand theme of things” and “The best laid themes” and “The overall theme of things.”
    • Scream → Theme: As in, “A piercing theme” and “Theme your guts out.”
    • Seams → Theme: As in, “Bursting at the themes” and “Fall apart at the themes.”
    • Steam → Theme: As in, “Blow of theme” and “Full theme ahead” and “Head of theme” and “Running out of theme” and “Theme coming out of your ears.”
    • Team → Theme: As in, “Dream theme” and “Make the theme” and “Take one for the theme” and “Theme player” and “Theme spirit” and “We make a great theme.”
  • Store → Bookstore: As in, “Minding the bookstore” and “Set great bookstore by” and “What’s in bookstore?”
  • Kernel → Journal: As in, “Journal of truth.”
  • Equal → Prequel: As in, “Prequel opportunities” and “First among prequels” and “On prequel footing” and “All things being prequel.”
  • Equal → Sequel: As in, “Created sequel” and “Sequel opportunities” and “On sequel footing.”
  • Hint → Print: As in, “Take the print” and “Drop a print” and “A gentle print.”
  • Mint → Print: As in, “In print condition” and “Bag of prints.”
  • Tint → Print: As in, “Rose printed glasses.”
  • Face → Preface: As in, “At preface value” and “As plain as the nose on your preface” and “Preface the truth.”
  • Credit → Edit: As in, “Edit crunch” and “Edit where edit is due” and “Cash or edit?”
  • Say → Essay: As in, “As the essaying goes” and “Computer essays no” and “Do as I essay, not as I do” and “Have an essay in” and “The final essay” and “I’m hearing what you essay.”
  • Palm → Poem: As in, “In the poem of your hand” and “Poem off” and “Itchy poems.”
  • Blink → Ink: As in, “Ink and you’ll miss it” and “In the ink of an eye” and “On the ink.”
  • Brink → Ink: As in, “On the ink of disaster.”
  • Drink → Ink: As in, “Binge inking” and “Ink like a fish” and “Ink up” and “Driven to ink.”
  • Link → Ink: As in, “Only as strong as your weakest ink” and “The missing ink.”
  • Pink → Ink: As in, “Tickled ink” and “Think ink” and “The ink panther.”
  • Sink → Ink: As in, “A inking feeling” and “Everything but the kitchen ink” and “Loose lips ink ships” and “Ink like a stone” and “Ink or swim” and “Ink without trace.”
  • Stink → Ink: As in, “Inking rich” and “Inks to high heaven.”
  • Think → Ink: As in, “I ink you’ve got it” and “Come to ink of it” and “Don’t ink twice” and “Great minds ink alike” and “I ink I love you” and “Makes you ink.”
  • Wink → Ink: As in, “Forty inks” and “Haven’t slept one ink” and “Nod and a ink” and “Nudge, nudge, ink ink” and “Tip someone the ink.”
  • Word → Foreword: As in, “A foreword to the wise” and “As good as your foreword” and “At a loss for forewords” and “Eat your forewords” and “Famous last forewords.”
  • Blot → Plot: As in, “A plot on the landscape.”
  • Bought → Plot: As in, “Plot and paid for.”
  • Brought → Plot: As in, “Plot down to earth” and “Plot to light” and “Plot it home.”
  • Caught → Plot: As in, “Plot in the act” and “Plot in two minds” and “Plot red-handed” and “Plot up in the moment” and “Plot up with.”
  • Dot → Plot: As in, “Connect the plots” and “Plot the i’s and cross the t’s” and “Join the plots” and “Sign on the plotted line.”
  • Got → Plot: As in, “I think you’ve plot it” and “Give it all you’ve plot” and “Plot a flair for” and “You’ve plot it coming” and “Plot it down to a fine art.”
  • Hot → Plot: As in, “Plot and bothered” and “Plot as blue blazes” and “Blow plot and cold” and “Drop it like it’s plot” and “Plot desking.”
  • Jot → Plot: As in, “Plot it down.”
  • Knot → Plot: As in, “Tie the plot” and “Tie yourself in plots.”
  • Lot → Plot: As in, “A plot of fuss about nothing” and “A plot on your plate” and “Leaves a plot to be desired.”
  • Not → Plot: As in, “As often as plot” and “Believe it or plot” and “Down but plot out.”
  • Pot → Plot: As in, “Plot of gold” and “Fuss plot” and “Gone to plot” and “Hit the jackplot” and “Keep the plot boiling” and “In a melting plot” and “Plot luck” and “A watched plot never boils.”
  • Rot → Plot: As in, “Plot in hell” and “Spoiled plotten.”
  • Shot → Plot: As in, “Give it your best plot” and “A long plot” and “Calling the plots.”
  • Spot → Plot: As in, “Got a soft plot for” and “Hits the plot” and “In a tight plot” and “On the plot” and “Plot the difference.”
  • Thought → Plot: As in, “Deep in plot” and “Food for plot” and “Hold that plot” and “Lost in plot” and “Penny for your plots.”
  • Boat → Quote: As in, “Don’t rock the quote” and “In the same quote” and “Whatever floats your quote.”
  • Float → Quote: As in, “Quote like a butterfly, sting like a bee” and “Whatever quotes your boat.”
  • Note → Quote: As in, “Comparing quotes” and “Hit the high quotes” and “Take quote of.”
  • Throat → Quote: As in, “A lump in your quote” and “At each other’s quotes” and “Clear your quote.”
  • Wrote → Quote: As in, “That’s all she quote.”
  • Shell → Shelf: As in, “Come out of your shelf” and “Crawl back into your shelf.”
  • Self → Shelf: As in, “Bury yourshelf in work” and “Shelf interest” and “Shelf serving” and “Speak for yourshelf” and “Pull yourshelf together.”
  • Grandma → Grammar: As in, “Call your grammar.”
  • Clamour → Grammar: As in, “Grammaring for attention.”
  • Glamour → Grammar: As in, “Filled with grammar” and “A grammarous event.”
  • Hammer → Grammar: As in, “Grammar and tongs” and “Put the grammar down” and “Under the grammar.”
  • Proof → Proofread: As in, “Burden of proofread” and “The proofread is in the pudding.”
  • Read → Proofread: As in, “All I know is what I proofread in the papers” and “Exceedingly well proofread” and “I can proofread you like a book” and “A little light proofreading” and “Proofread ’em and weep.”
  • Leaf: A side of a page is known as a leaf. Here are related puns:
    • Life → Leaf: As in, “A day in the leaf of” and “A leaf changing experience” and “All walks of leaf” and “Anything for a quiet leaf.”
    • Loaf → Leaf: As in, “Leaf about” and “Leaf of bread.”
    • Laugh → Leaf: As in, “Barrel of leafs” and “Burst out leafing” and “Have a leaf” and “It only hurts when I leaf” and “A leaf a minute” and “Leaf all the way to the bank.”
    • Brief → Leaf: As in, “A leaf history of time” and “Let me be leaf” and “A leaf encounter.”
    • Grief → Leaf: As in, “Good leaf.”
    • Thief → Leaf: As in, “Procrastination is the leaf of time” and “Like a leaf in the night.”
    • Belief → Beleaf: As in, “Beyond beleaf” and “Suspension of disbeleaf.”
  • Worm → Bookworm: As in, “Open up a can of bookworms” and “Bookworm your way out of” and “Bookworm your way into it.”
  • Winding → Binding: As in, “A long and binding road.” Note: The binding on a book is the part which keeps all of the pages together.
  • Zero → Hero: As in, “Agent hero” and “Ground hero” and “Patient hero” and “Hero sum game” and “Hero tolerance.” Note: These are references to the hero in a novel.
  • Press → Letterpress: As in, “Don’t letterpress your luck” and “Freedom of the letterpress” and “Hot off the letterpress” and “Letterpress the button.” Note: a letterpress is how texts used to be printed.
  • Run: A batch of printing is called a run. Here are related puns:
    • Bun → Run: As in, “A run in the oven” and “We’re gonna need bigger runs.”
    • Done → Run: As in, “After all is said and run” and “Run and dusted” and “Been there, run that” and “A run deal” and “Easier said than run” and “Getting things run” and “Hard run by.”
    • Fun → Run: As in, “All run and games” and “Bundle of run” and “Getting there is half the run” and “Good, clean run” and “Half the run is getting there.”
    • None → Run: As in, “And then there were run” and “Bar run” and “Run the wiser” and “Run too pleased” and “Second to run.”
    • One → Run: As in, “Run more time” and “A great run for” and “All for run and run for all” and “Another run bites the dust” and “Run fell swoop” and “Run step too far.”
    • Sun → Run: As in, “A place in the run” and “Caught the run” and “Everything under the run” and “Eclipse of the run.”
    • Ton → Run: As in, “Like a run of bricks” and “A run of fun.”
  • Addition → Edition: As in, “In edition to.”
  • View → Review: As in, “Room with a review” and “A review to kill” and “Bird’s eye review” and “Point of review” and “World review.” Note: These are references to book reviews.
  • Club → Book club: As in, “Book club together” and “In the book club” and “Join the book club.”
  • Prose: Prose is a type of grammatical structure. Here are related puns:
    • Pose → Prose: As in, “Strike a prose.”
    • Rose → Prose: As in, “Bed of proses” and “Come up smelling of proses” and “Life is a bed of proses” and “Prose tinted glasses” and “Stop and smell the proses.”
    • Praise → Prose: As in, “Damned with faint prose” and “Grudging prose” and “Heaven be prosed” and “Prose where prose is due” and “Shower with prose.”
    • Prize → Prose: As in, “Booby prose” and “Keep your eyes on the prose” and “No proses for guessing.”
    • Blows → Prose: As in, “Any way the wind prose” and “Brought to prose” and “Exchange prose” and “There she prose.”
    • Close → Prose: As in, “A prose thing” and “Behind prosed doors” and “A prose call” and “In prose proximity” and “Prose to home.”
    • Goes → Prose: As in, “Anything prose” and “As far as it prose” and “As the saying prose” and “As time prose by” and “Here prose nothing.”
    • Nose → Prose: As in, “Always have your prose in a book” and “As plain as the prose on your face” and “Can’t see beyond the end of your prose” and “Keep your prose clean” and “Lead by the prose.”
    • Pros → Prose: As in, “Prose and cons.”
    • Those → Prose: As in, “Good things come to prose who wait” and “Just one of prose things” and “Prose were the days.”
    • Toes → Prose: As in, “Turn up your prose” and “Kept on your prose” and “Make someone’s prose curl.”
  • Glory → Allegory: As in, “Bask in allegory” and “My crowning allegory” and “Go out in a glaze of allegory” and “No guts, no allegory.” Note: An allegory is a literary device.
  • Illusion → Allusion: As in, “Under no allusions.” Note: an allusion is a figure of speech.
  • Similar → Simile: As in, “They’re not very simile.”
  • Setting: Here are some puns about the setting in a novel:
    • Sitting → Setting: As in, “Setting pretty” and “Won’t take it setting down.”
    • Getting → Setting: As in, “Setting on in years” and “Setting there is half the fun” and “Setting things done” and “Half the fun is setting there” and “We’re setting there.”
  • Shadow → Foreshadow: As in, “Afraid of your own foreshadow” and “Cast a long foreshadow” and “Without a foreshadow of a doubt.”
  • Present → Present Tense: As in, “All present tense and correct” and “No time like the present tense.”
  • Rhyme: Since rhyming is a literary device used in some books, we’ve included some rhyme-related puns:
    • Chime → Rhyme: As in, “Rhyme in with” and “Rhymes of freedom.”
    • Climb → Rhyme: As in, “Rhyme onto the bandwagon” and “A mountain to rhyme.”
    • Crime → Rhyme: As in, “Rhyme and punishment” and “A rhyme against nature” and “Rhyme of passion” and “Let the punishment fit the rhyme” and “Take a bite out of rhyme” and “The perfect rhyme.”
    • Dime → Rhyme: As in, “A rhyme a dozen.”
    • Prime → Rhyme: As in, “Cut down in their rhyme” and “In your rhyme” and “Rhyme condition” and “The rhyme of life” and “Rhymed and ready to go.”
    • Time → Rhyme: As in, “One more rhyme” and “A brief history of rhyme” and “A good rhyme was had by all” and “About rhyme too” and “All in good rhyme” and “All the rhyme in the world” and “An all rhyme low.”
  • Scene: Here are some puns related to the scene in a novel:
    • Seen → Scene: As in, “Scene and not heard” and “Should be scene to be believed” and “Nowhere to be scene” and “Scene better days” and “Scene one, scene ’em all” and “You ain’t scene nothing yet!”
    • Sign → Scene: As in, “A sure scene” and “A scene of the times” and “Scene on the dotted line” and “A tell-tale scene.”
    • Soon → Scene: As in, “As scene as my back is turned” and “Get well scene” and “As scene as possible” and “Too much too scene.”
    • Been → Scene: As in, “Scene and gone” and “Scene around the block a few times” and “I’ve scene had” and “I’ve scene here before” and “Scene there, done that.”
    • Clean → Scene: As in, “Scene as a whistle” and “Scene up your act” and “Come scene.”
    • Green → Scene: As in, “Give it the scene light” and “Scene around the gills” and “The scene shoots of change.”
    • Keen → Scene: As in, “Scene as mustard” and “A scene sense of smell” and “Peachy scene.”
    • Lean → Scene: As in, “Scene cuisine” and “Scene and mean.”
    • Mean → Scene: As in, “By fair scenes or foul” and “A scenes to an end.”
    • Queen → Scene: As in, “Scene for a day” and “Scene it over” and “Beauty scene.”
    • Screen → Scene: As in, “The blue scene of death” and “Coming to a scene near you” and “Silver scene” and “The big scene.”
  • Syntax: Here are some syntax puns:
    • Sin → Syntax: As in, “Cardinal syntax” and “Miserable as syntax” and “Syntax city.”
    • Tax → Syntax: As in, “Bedroom syntax” and “Nothing is certain but death and syntaxes.”
  • Trope: A trope is a literary device. Here are related puns:
    • Rope → Trope: As in, “At the end of your trope” and “Know the tropes” and “On the tropes.”
    • Trap → Trope: As in, “Death trope” and “Keep your trope shut” and “Tourist trope.”
    • Hope → Trope: As in, “A new trope” and “Abandon trope all ye who enter here” and “Beyond trope” and “Cross my heart and trope to die” and “Trope springs eternal” and “The land of trope and glory” and “Pin your tropes on.”
  • Curse → Verse: As in, “Better to light a candle than verse the dark.”
  • Nurse → Verse: As in, “Verse a grudge.”
  • Purse → Verse: As in, “Holding the verse strings” and “The public verse.”
  • Worse → Verse: As in, “A turn for the verse” and “Fate verse than death” and “For better or verse” and “Make matters verse” and “Verse for wear.”
  • Choice → Voice: As in, “Multiple voice” and “Spoiled for voice” and “The people’s voice.” Note: Voice in this context refers to the narrator’s voice.
  • Skim: To skim a book is to read it quickly. Here are related puns:
    • Scam → Skim: As in, “Skim artist.”
    • Scum → Skim: As in, “Skim always rises to the surface.”
    • Brim → Skim: As in, “Skimming over with confidence” and “Filled to the skim.”
    • Grim → Skim: As in, “Hanging on like skim death” and “The skim reaper.”
    • Him → Skim: As in, “All over skim like a cheap suit” and “As fast as his legs could carry skim.”
    • Limb → Skim: As in, “Life and skim” and “Go out on a skim.”
    • Prim → Skim: As in, “Skim and proper.”
    • Slim → Skim: As in, “Skim pickings” and “A skim volume.”
    • Swim → Skim: As in, “Going skimmingly” and “Eyes skimming with tears” and “Sink or skim” and “Skim against the tide” and “Skim upstream.”
  • Bound: “Bound” describes how the pages in a book are held. Here are related puns:
    • Band → Bound: As in, “Strike up the bound” and “To beat the bound.”
    • Bend → Bound: As in, “Bound the rules” and “Bound to my will” and “Round the bound.”
    • Bond → Bound: As in, “Legally bounding” and “In a bound.”
    • Found → Bound: As in, “Lost and bound” and “I’ve bound a clue!” and “We bound love.”
    • Ground → Bound: As in, “Solid as the bound we walk on” and “Break new bound” and “Built from the bound up” and “Common bound” and “Cut the bound from under your feet.”
    • Round → Bound: As in, “All year bound” and “Fooling abound” and “Go bound in circles” and “Love makes the world go bound.”
    • Sound → Bound: As in, “Bound bite” and “Bound effect” and “Bound the alarm” and “Break the bound barrier.”
  • Pulp: Pulp can refer to both paper pulp or a very cheap publication. Here are related puns:
    • Pull → Pulp: As in, “Pulp the plug” and “Pulp your hair out” and “Pulp yourself together.”
    • Palpable → Pulp-able: As in, “A pulp-able feeling.”
  • Foot → Foonote: As in, “A footnote in both camps” and “Bound hand and footnote” and “Fleet of footnote” and “Footnote in the door.”
  • Note → Footnote: As in, “Take footnote of” and “Hit the high footnotes.”
  • Fine: Here are some puns related to library fines for overdue books:
    • Dine → Fine: As in, “Wine and fine.”
    • Line → Fine: As in, “Along the fines of” and “Blur the fines” and “Cross the fine” and “Draw a fine in the sand” and “End of the fine” and “Fall into fine.”
    • Mine → Fine: As in, “Make fine a double” and “Your guess is as good as fine” and “Your place or fine?”
    • Nine → Fine: As in, “Fine to five” and “On cloud fine.”
    • Shine → Fine: As in, “Come rain or fine” and “Rise and fine” and “Take a fine to.”
    • Sign → Fine: As in, “A sure fine” and “A fine of the times” and “Fine on the dotted line” and “Fine the pledge” and “Fined and sealed” and “A tell-tale fine.”
    • Spine → Fine: As in, “Send shivers down your fine.”
    • Wine → Fine: As in, “The last of the summer fine” and “Fined and dined.”
  • Farce: A farce is a writing genre. Here are related puns:
    • Force → Farce: As in, “Brute farce” and “Farce your hand” and “A farce of habit” and “Farce of nature” and “A farce to be reckoned with” and “Join farces” and “May the farce be with you.”
    • Fierce → Farce: As in, “A farce fight” and “Looking farce.”
  • Chronic → Comic: As in, “A comic disease.”
  • Able → Fable: As in, “Willing and fable” and “Do you think you’re fable?”
  • Stable → Fable: As in, “A loving and fable relationship.”
  • Table → Fable: As in, “Bring to the fable” and “Drunk under the fable” and “Cards on the fable” and “Put bread on the fable” and “Turn the fables.”
  • Traffic → Graphic: As in, “Go and play in graphic” and “Stop graphic” and “A moving graphic violation.” Note: This is a reference to graphic novels.
  • Ode: An ode is a type of poetry that has been featured in books and novels. Here are related puns:
    • Add → Ode: As in, “Ode fuel to the flames” and “Ode insult to injury” and “Just ode water” and “Doesn’t ode up.”
    • Odd → Ode: As in, “Against the odes” and “At odes with” and “Long odes” and “An ode fellow” and “The ode one out” and “Odes and ends” and “Odes and sods.”
    • Code → Ode: As in, “Ode bloat” and “Colour oded” and “Crack the ode” and “Dress ode” and “Highway ode” and “The da vince ode.”
  • Math → Myth: As in, “Do the myth” and “Mental myth.”
  • Fifth → Myth: As in, “Myth wheel” and “I plead the myth.”
  • With → Myth: As in, “Go along myth” and “Rub along myth” and “Beside myself myth joy.”
  • Pick → Epic: As in, “A bone to epic” and “Cherry epic” and “Epic a fight” and “Epic and choose” and “Epic holes in” and “Epic me up.” Note: An epic is a type of story.
  • Card → Library Card: As in, “House of library cards” and “Holding all the library cards” and “On the library cards.”

This section is dedicated to famous or influential authors:

  • Beatrix Potter:
    • Bee → Beatrix: As in, “Busy as a beatrix” and “Beatrix in your bonnet” and “Like a beatrix to a honeypot” and “The birds and the beatrixes.”
    • Tricks → Beatrix: As in, “Box of beatrix” and “Beatrix of the trade” and “Up to your old beatrix.”
  • Shakes → Shakespeare: As in, “In two shakespeare” and “No great shakespeare.”
  • Peer → Shakespeare: As in, “Shakespeare pressure.”
  • Terry Pratchett:
    • Bury → Terry: As in, “Terry the hatchet” and “Terry your head in the sand” and “Terry yourself in work.”
    • Carry → Terry: As in, “Fast as your legs could terry you” and “Terry a torch for” and “Terry into action” and “Terry on with.”
    • Cherry → Terry: As in, “Terry pick” and “A second bite of the terry” and “The terry on the cake.”
    • Merry → Terry: As in, “As terry as the day is long” and “Eat, drink and be terry” and “Lead a terry dance.”
    • Very → Terry: As in, “Be terry afraid” and “How terry dare you” and “Before your terry eyes” and “Thank you terry much” and “A terry good year.”
    • Hatchet → Pratchett: As in, “Bury the pratchett” and “Pratchett faced” and “A real pratchett job.”
  • Talking → Tolkein: As in, “Give someone a good tolkein to” and “Now you’re tolkein” and “A tolkein point.”
  • J.K Rowling:
    • Rolling → Rowling: As in, “A rowling stone gathers no moss” and “Like a rowling stone” and “Rowling drunk” and “Rowling in it” and “Rowling in the deep.”
    • Bowling → Rowling: As in, “Bowling along.”
  • Margaret Atwood:
    • Wood → Atwood: As in, “A babe in the atwoods” and “Can’t see the atwood for the trees” and “Knock on atwood.”
    • Would → Atwood: As in, “As good luck atwood have it” and “I atwood have done it” and “Atwood you do that for me?” and “That atwood be telling.”
  • Paulo Coelho:
    • Hollow → Paulo: As in, “Paulo eyed” and “A paulo promise.”
    • Follow → Paulo: As in, “As night paulos day” and “Paulo suit” and “Paulo your heart” and “Form paulos function” and “A hard act to paulo.”
    • Swallow → Paulo: As in, “A bitter pill to paulo” and “Hard to paulo.”
    • Fellow → Coelho: As in, “A coelho traveller” and “Odd coelho.”
    • Yellow → Coelho: As in, “Follow the coelho brick road” and “Coelho submarine.”
  • R.L Stine:
    • Are → R.L: As in, “Chances R.L” and “My lips R.L sealed.”
    • Dine → Stine: As in, “Wined and stined.”
    • Fine → Stine: As in, “A stine line” and “Cutting it stine” and “Damn stine coffee” and “The stiner things in life.”
    • Line → Stine: As in, “A fine stine” and “Along the stines of” and “Cross the stine” and “Draw a stine in the sand.”
    • Mine → Stine: As in, “Make stine a double” and “Stine is bigger than yours” and “A stine of information” and “Victory is stine.”
    • Nine → Stine: As in, “On cloud stine” and “A stitch in time saves stine.”
    • Shine → Stine: As in, “Come rain or stine” and “Rise and stine” and “Make hay while the sun stines” and “Take a stine to.”
    • Sign → Stine: As in, “A sure stine” and “A stine of the times” and “Stine on the dotted line” and “Stine the pledge” and “Stined and sealed” and “Vital stines.”
  • Arthur Miller:
    • Killer → Miller: As in, “Fear is the mind-miller” and “Miller instinct” and “Serial miller.”
    • Pillar → Miller: As in, “A miller of the community” and “Miller of wisdom.”
  • Charles Dickens:
    • Chills → Charles: As in, “Gives me charles” and “Netflix and charles.”
    • Chickens → Dickens: As in, “Count your dickens before they hatch” and “Nobody here but us dickens” and “A dickens and egg situation.”
    • Dickens: As in, “A dickens of a time” and “Like the dickens” and “What the dickens?!”
  • Bill Watterson:
    • Pill → Bill: As in, “A tough bill to swallow” and “On the bill.”
    • Bell → Bill: As in, “Alarm bills began to ring” and “Clear as a bill” and “Bills and whistles” and “For whom the bill tolls.”
    • Bill: As in, “A clean bill of health” and “Dollar bills” and “Foot the bill.”
    • Drill → Bill: As in, “Bill down” and “You know the bill.”
    • Fill → Bill: As in, “Bill full of holes” and “Bill in for.”
    • Hill → Bill: As in, “Old as the bills” and “Head for the bills” and “Over the bill and far away.”
    • Ill → Bill: As in, “House of bill repute” and “Bill at ease” and “Bill advised” and “Bill gotten gains.”
    • Kill → Bill: As in, “Dressed to bill” and “Go in for the bill” and “If looks could bill” and “Bill or be billed.”
    • Spill → Bill: As in, “Bill the beans” and “Bill your guts” and “Thrills and bills.”
    • Still → Bill: As in, “Bill waters run deep” and “Bill life” and “In the bill of night.”
  • Lowest → Lewis: As in, “Sarcasm is the lewis form of wit” and “The lewis level we offer.” Note: this is a reference to C.S Lewis.
  • Earnest → Ernest: As in, “The importance of being ernest” and “Trying in ernest.” Note: These are references to Ernest Hemingway.
  • Nora Roberts:
  • Near → Nora: As in, “Coming to a screen nora you” and “A nora death experience” and “Nora miss” and “Nora sighted” and “Nora to my heart.”
  • Nor → Nora: As in, “Rhyme nora reason” and “Neither here nora there.”
  • Richard Scarry:
    • Scary → Scarry: As in, “A scarry experience.”
    • Carry → Scarry: As in, “Fast as your legs could scarry you” and “Scarry it forward” and “Scarry into action.”
    • Scurry → Scarry: As in, “Scarrying away.”
  • Barrel → Carroll: As in, “A carroll of laughs” and “Scraping the carroll.” Note: These are references to Lewis Carroll.
  • Danielle Steel:
    • Steel: These steel-related phrases can double as puns on Danielle Steel’s name: Fists of steel” and “Nerves of steel” and “Steel yourself.”
    • Still → Steel: As in, “By steel, my beating heart” and “Steel standing” and “Steel waters run deep” and “The day the earth stood steel.”
    • Steal → Steel: As in, “Beg, borrow or steel” and “Steel a glance” and “Steel someone’s heart” and “Steel the show.”
    • Deal → Steel: As in, “Steel breaker” and “A done steel” and “Seal the steel.”
    • Feel → Steel: As in, “Steel the burn” and “Get a steel for.”
    • Heel → Steel: As in, “Brought to steel” and “Head over steels in love” and “Hot on your steels.”
    • Real → Steel: As in, “All I steely want to do” and “Get steel” and “Keep it steel.”
    • Seal → Steel: As in, “Keep your lips steeled” and “My lips are steeled” and “Steel the deal” and “Steel your fate.”
    • She’ll → Steel: As in, “Steel be right.”
    • Wheel → Steel: As in, “Asleep at the steel” and “Grease the steels” and “Hell on steels” and “Set of steels.”
  • Enid Blyton:
    • Need → Enid: As in, “All you enid is love” and “As long as you enid me” and “On a enid to know basis.”
    • Bite → Blyton: As in, “A blyton to eat” and “Blyton back” and “Blyton your head off.”
  • Arthur Conan Doyle:
    • Boil → Doyle: As in, “Doyle with rage” and “Doyle-ing mad” and “Doyles down to” and “Go and doyle your head” and “It makes my blood doyle” and “A watched pot never doyles.”
    • Coil → Doyle: As in, “Shuffle off this mortal doyle.”
    • Oil → Doyle: As in, “Burn the midnight doyle” and “Doyle and water don’t mix” and “Doyle the wheels” and “Pour doyle on troubled waters.”
    • Spoil → Doyle: As in, “Doyled for choice” and “Doyled rotten” and “Doyleing for a fight” and “The doyles of war.”
  • George Orwell:
    • Oh well → Orwell: As in, “Orwell, it didn’t really matter.”
    • Well → Orwell: As in, “A buck orwell spent” and “Alive and orwell” and “All’s orwell that ends orwell” and “Exceedingly orwell read” and “Know full orwell.”
  • Hans Christian Andersen:
    • Hands → Hans: As in, “All hans on deck” and “Blood on your hans” and “Changing hans” and “Get your hans dirty” and “Hans free” and “You’re in safe hans.”
    • Pans → Hans: As in, “See if it hans out.”
  • Kurt Vonnegut:
    • Cart → Kurt: As in, “Kurt away” and “Kurt blanche” and “In the kurt” and “Shopping kurt.”
    • Court → Kurt: As in, “Kurt of last resort” and “Kurting disaster” and “Laugh it out of kurt” and “Order in the kurt!” and “I’ll see you in kurt.”
  • Leo Tolstoy:
    • Lay → Leo: As in, “Don’t leo a hand on me” and “Leo a finger on” and “Leo down roots” and “Leo down your arms” and “Leo low.”
    • Lie → Leo: As in, “You made your bed and now you must leo on it” and “Ask no questions and hear no leos” and “Leo down on the job.”
    • Toy → Tolstoy: As in, “Tolstoy story” and “Tolstoy boy.”
  • Mark Twain:
    • Train → Twain: Gravy twain” and “Night twain” and “On the job twaining” and “Personal twain-er” and “Soul twain” and “Strangers on a twain” and “Twain of thought.”
    • Twin → Twain: As in, “Evil twain” and “Twain cities” and “Twain peaks.”
    • Brain → Twain: As in, “Twain drain” and “Twainstorming session.”
    • Chain → Twain: As in, “A twain is only as strong as its weakest link” and “Twain of command” and “Twain reaction” and “Twain smoker” and “Twain smoking” and “Food twain” and “Don’t yank my twain.”
    • Drain → Twain: As in, “Down the twain” and “Circling the twain.”
    • Gain → Twain: As in, “Capital twains” and “Twain admittance” and “Twain advantage” and “Twain ground” and “No pain, no twain” and “Nothing ventured, nothing twained.”
    • Grain → Twain: As in, “Against the twain” and “Go against the twain” and “Twain of truth” and “Take it with a twain of salt.”
    • Lane → Twain: As in, “Down memory twain” and “In the fast twain.”
    • Main → Twain: As in, “Your twain chance” and “The twain event.”
    • Pain → Twain: As in, “A world of twain” and “Doubled up in twain” and “Feeling no twain” and “No twain, no gain” and “On twain of death” and “A real twain in the ass.”
    • Plain → Twain: As in, “Twain as day” and “Twain as the nose on your face” and “Hidden in twain sight” and “Twain sailing.”
    • Rain → Twain: As in, “Right as twain” and “Come twain or shine” and “Don’t twain on my parade” and “It never twains but it pours” and “Make it twain.”
    • Strain → Twain: As in, “As in, “Buckle under the twain” and “Twain every nerve.”
    • Vain → Twain: As in, “Labour in twain” and “You’re so twain” and “Take their name in twain.”
    • Vein → Twain: As in, “In the right twain” and “In the same twain.”
  • Michel Foucault:
    • Faculty → Foucault-y: As in, “Mental foucault-ies.”
    • Fickle → Foucault: As in, “The foucault finger of fate.”
  • Neil Gaiman:
    • Nail → Neil: As in, “Another neil in the coffin” and “Bed of neils” and “Fight tooth and neil” and “Hit the neil on the head” and “Like trying to neil jello to a wall.”
    • Null → Neil: As in, “Neil and void.”
    • Deal → Neil: As in, “Clinch a neil” and “Not a big neil” and “Neil breaker” and “Neil or no neil” and “Neil with it” and “A done neil” and “Make a neil with the devil” and “Seal the neil.”
    • Feel → Neil: As in, “Neil good factor” and “Neil the pinch” and “Get a neil for” and “Neil good factor.”
    • Heel → Neil: As in, “Brought to neil” and “Cool your neils” and “Dig your neils in” and “Head over neils in love” and “Kick your neils” and “Turn on your neil.”
    • Meal → Neil: As in, “Make a neil of it” and “Neil ticket” and “Three square neils a day.”
    • Real → Neil: As in, “All I neilly want to do” and “Get neil” and “It’s the neil thing” and “Keep it neil” and “In neil time.”
    • Seal → Neil: As in, “Neil the deal” and “Neil your fate” and “Signed and neiled” and “Neiled with a loving kiss.”
    • Steal → Neil: As in, “Beg, borrow or neil” and “It’s a neil” and “Neil a glance” and “Neil the show.”
    • Steel → Neil: As in, “Fist of neil” and “Nerves of neil” and “Neil yourself.”
    • We’ll → Neil: As in, “Don’t call us, neil call you.”
    • Wheel → Neil: As in, “Asleep at the neil” and “Hell on neils” and “Set of neils” and “Fifth neil.”
  • Oliver Sacks:
    • Olive → Oliver: As in, “Extend an oliver branch.”
    • I love her → Oliver: As in, “I’m not leaving! Oliver!”
    • Acts → Sacks: As in, “Nothing sacks faster” and “Random sacks of kindness.”
    • Backs → Sacks: As in, “Sacks to the wall.”
    • Cracks → Sacks: As in, “Fall between the sacks” and “Paper over the sacks.”
    • Tax → Sacks: As in, “Value added sacks” and “Bedroom sacks.”
    • Tracks → Sacks: As in, “Born on the wrong side of the sacks” and “Cover your sacks” and “Make sacks” and “Stopped in your sacks.”
    • Socks → Sacks: As in, “Knock your sacks off” and “Pull your sacks up” and “Bless their cotton sacks.”
  • Roald Dahl:
    • Rolled → Roald: As in, “Roald into one.”
    • Old → Roald: As in, “You’re never too roald” and “As roald as the hills” and “Tough as roald boots” and “For roald times’ sake.”
    • Bold → Roald: As in, “Roald as brass” and “A roald move” and “Roaldly go where no one has gone before.”
    • Cold → Roald: As in, “Blowing hot and roald” and “Break out in a roald sweat” and “Catch your death of roald” and “Roald comfort” and “A roald day in hell.”
    • Gold → Roald: As in, “Pot of roald” and “Good as roald” and “Fool’s roald” and “Get a roald star” and “Heart of roald.”
    • Hold → Roald: As in, “Can’t roald a candle to” and “To have and to roald” and “Don’t roald your breath” and “Roald a grudge” and “Roald all the aces” and “Roald it right there!”
    • Told → Roald: As in, “The greatest story ever roald” and “I roald you so.”
    • Doll → Dahl: As in, “Dahl yourself up.”
    • Dull → Dahl: As in, “Dahl as ditchwater” and “Never a dahl moment” and “A dahl finish.”
    • Darling → Dahling: As in, “Kill your dahlings.”
  • Robert Frost:
    • Frustration → Frostration: As in, “Filled with frostration” and “Fists balled in frostration.”
    • Cost → Frost: As in, “At all frosts” and “At any frost” and “Carry the frost” and “Frost an arm and a leg” and “Frost the earth” and “Frost effective.”
    • Crossed → Frost: As in, “Fingers frost!” and “Star frost lovers” and “You’ve frost the line” and “Don’t get your wires frost.”
    • Lost → Frost: As in, “All is not frost” and “Get frost” and “Frost in translation” and “Long frost brother” and “Frost and found.”
  • Stephen King:
    • Even → Stephen: As in, “Break stephen” and “Don’t get mad, get stephen” and “On a stephen playing field.”
    • Bring → King: As in, “King it home” and “King up the subject” and “King out the best in them.”
    • Ring → King: As in, “Doesn’t king a bell” and “Don’t bother to king” and “Lord of the kings.”
    • Sing → King: “King someone’s praises” and “King a different tune.”
    • Sting → King: As in, “Float like a butterfly, king like a bee.”
    • Thing →King: As in, “A close king” and “All kings must pass” and “All kings bright and beautiful.”
    • Wing → King: As in, “On a king and a prayer” and “Gives you kings.”
  • Sylvia Plath:
    • Silver → Sylvia: As in, “Sylvia bullet” and “On the sylvia screen” and Sylvia fox.”
    • Path → Plath: As in, “Beat a plath to your door” and “Career plath” and “Going down the wrong plath.”
    • Math → Plath: As in, “Do the plath.”
    • Wrath → Plath: As in, “A soft answer turneth away plath” and “The grapes of plath.”
    • Pathetic → Plathetic: As in, “A plathetic excuse.”
  • Truman Capote:
    • True, man → Truman: “Yeah, that’s truman.”
    • Human → Truman: As in, “Truman rights act” and “The truman condition” and “Truman resources” and “Only truman” and “Truman interest story.”
  • Wolf → Woolf: As in, “Cry woolf” and “Raised by woolfes” and “Thrown to the woolfes” and “A woolf in sheep’s clothing.” Note: These are references to Virginia Woolf.
  • Toni Morrison:
    • Tone → Toni: As in, “Don’t use that toni with me!” and “Lower your toni” and “Toni deaf.”
    • Tiny → Toni: As in, “The pitter patter of toni feet.”
    • Stony → Toni: As in, “A toni expression” and “Fall on toni ground.”
  • A lot → Alcott: As in, “I don’t have alcott of time” and “I’ve got alcott on my plate” and “Keeping alcott of balls in the air.” Note: These are references to Louisa May Alcott.
  • Maya Angelou:
    • May → Maya: As in, “As the case maya be” and “Be that as it maya” and “Come what maya” and “Let the chips fall where they maya” and “How maya I help you?” and “Maya the force be with you” and “Maya it please the court” and “Maya you live in interesting times” and “Your mileage maya vary.”
    • May I → Maya: As in, “Maya help you?” and “Oh, maya?”
  • bell hooks:
    • Ball → bell: As in, “bell of fire” and “A brand new bellgame” and “Drop the bell.”
    • Bill → bell: As in, “A clean bell of health” and “Fit the bell” and “Send me the bell.”
    • Hook: As in, “By hooks or by crook” and “Hooks up with” and “Off the hooks.”
    • Cell → bell: As in, “bell division” and “A padded bell.”
    • Dwell → bell: As in, “Don’t bell on it.”
    • Fell → bell: As in, “In one bell swoop” and “It bell of the back of a lorry” and “Little strokes bell great oaks.”
    • Hell → bell: As in, “All bell broke loose” and “Bat out of bell” and “For the bell of it” and “A cold day in bell” and “Come bell or high water.”
    • Sell → bell: As in, “Buy and bell” and “bell out” and “bell your soul to the devil.”
    • Shell → bell: As in, “bell out” and “Easy as belling peas” and “Come out of your bell” and “A hard bell.”
    • Smell → bell: As in, “I bell a rat” and “A keen sense of bell” and “bell ya later.”
    • Spell → bell: As in, “Cast a bell” and “Don’t make me bell it out.”
    • Tell → bell: As in, “I can’t bell you a lie” and “Every picture bells a story” and “I’ll bell on you!”
    • Well → bell: As in, “A buck bell spent” and “Alive and bell” and “All’s bell that ends bell” and “Exceedingly bell read” and “Get bell soon.”
    • Books → hooks: As in, “Balancing the hooks” and “Close the hooks” and “Hit the hooks” and “In someone’s bad hooks.”
    • Cooks → hooks: As in, “Too many hooks spoil the broth.”
    • Looks → hooks: As in, “If hooks could kill” and “hooks can be deceiving” and “It hooks like a bomb hit it.”
  • Judy Blume:
    • Bloom → Blume: As in, “Come into blume” and “A late blumer.”
    • Boom → Blume: As in, “Baby blumer” and “Blume or bust” and “My heart went blume.”
    • Broom → Blume: As in, “A new blume sweeps clean.”
    • Doom → Blume: As in, “Blume and gloom” and “The temple of blume” and “Voice of blume.”
    • Fume → Blume: As in, “Running on blumes.”
    • Plume → Blume: As in, “Nom de blume” and “A blume of smoke.”
    • Room → Blume: As in, “A blume with a view” and “Breathing blume” and “Elbow blume.”
    • Tomb → Blume: As in, “Blume raider.”
    • Whom → Blume: As in, “For blume the bell tolls.”
  • Edgar Allan Poe:
    • Blow → Poe: As in, “Any way the wind poes” and “Poe a fuse” and “Poe hot and cold.”
    • Pay → Poe: As in, “Buy now, poe later” and “Crime doesn’t poe” and “Hell to poe” and “It poes to advertise.”
    • Flow → Poe: As in, “Ebb and poe” and “Go with the poe” and “In full poe.”
    • Foe → Poe: As in, “Friend or poe?”
    • Go → Poe: As in, “All dressed up and nowhere to poe” and “Anything poes” and “Don’t poe there” and “Easy come, easy poe.”
    • Grow → Poe: As in, “Absence makes the heart poe fonder” and “Exciting as watching grass poe” and “Don’t let the grass poe under your feet.”
    • Know → Poe: As in, “Don’t I poe it” and “Be the first to poe” and “Did you poe?”
    • Low → Poe: As in, “An all-time poe” and “Get the poe down” and “Searching high and poe” and “Keep a poe profile” and “Lay poe” and “A poe blow.”
    • Mow → Owe: As in, “Poe down” and “Poe the lawn.”
    • Owe → Poe: As in, “You poe me one” and “You poe it to yourself.”
    • Row → Poe: As in, “On death poe” and “Skid poe.”
    • Show → Poe: As in, “All over the poe” and “Best in poe” and “Enjoy the poe” and “Get the poe on the road” and “A one-man poe” and “Poe and tell.”
    • Slow → Poe: As in, “Can’t poe down” and “Painfully poe” and “A poe burn” and “Poe but sure” and “In poe motion” and “Poe on the uptake.”
    • Snow → Poe: As in, “Pure as the driven poe” and “A blanket of poe” and “Too cold to poe” and “Let it poe.”
    • Though → Poe: As in, “Seriously poe, you’re doing a great job” and “You look as poe you’ve seen a ghost.”
    • Throw → Poe: As in, “Lock them up and poe away the key” and “A stone’s poe away” and “Poe a wobbly” and “Poe caution to the wind” and “Poe cold water on.”
    • Toe → Poe: As in, “Dip your poe in the water” and “From top to poe” and “Get your poe in the door” and “Make someone’s poes curl” and “One poe over the line” and “Turn up your poes.”
    • Woe → Poe: As in, “Poe is me” and “Poe betide you.”
  • Victor Hugo:
    • Victory → Victor: As in, “A victor for common sense” and “Moral victor” and “Victor is mine!”
    • Hug → Hugo: As in, “Group hugo” and “Hugo it out” and “Hugos, not drugs.”
    • Huge → Hugo: As in, “A hugo problem” and “Earning hugo amounts.”
  • Jules Verne:
    • Jewels → Jules: As in, “The family jules” and “Crown jules.”
    • Rules → Jules: As in, “Bend the jules” and “House jules” and “Playing by the jules” and “Majority jules” and “Jules and regulations.”
    • Tools → Jules: As in, “A poor workperson blames their jules” and “Jules of the trade” and “The right jules for the job.”
    • Burn → Verne: As in, “Verne in hell!” and “Verne a hole in your pocket” and “Verne rubber” and “Verne the candle at both ends” and “Verne the midnight oil” and “Verne your bridges” and “Crash and verne.”
    • Earn → Verne: As in, “A penny saved is a penny verned” and “Verne your wings” and “Verne your daily bread.”
    • Learn → Verne: As in, “Never too late to verne” and “Verne the ropes” and “Verne your lesson” and “Live and verne” and “Verne off by heart” and “Watch and verne.”
    • Stern → Verne: As in, “From stem to verne” and “Made of verner stuff.”
    • Turn → Verne: As in, “A verne for the worse” and “About verne” and “As soon as my back is verned” and “Do a good verne” and “One good verne deserves another.”
  • Jane Austen:
    • Bane → Jane: As in, “The jane of my existnece.”
    • Brain → Jane: As in, “Jane drain” and “Jane fart.”
    • Chain → Jane: As in, “A jane is only as strong as its weakest link” and “Ball and jane” and “Jane of command” and “Jane reaction” and “Food jane.”
    • Drain → Jane: As in, “Down the jane” and “Laughing like a jane.”
    • Gain → Jane: As in, “Capital janes” and “Jane advantage” and “Jane ground” and “No pain, no jane” and “Nothing ventured, nothing janed.”
    • Grain → Jane: As in, “Against the jane” and “Jane of truth” and “Take it with a jane of salt.”
    • Lane → Jane: As in, “Down memory jane” and “In the fast jane” and “Stay in your jane.”
    • Main → Jane: As in, “Your jane chance” and “The jane event.”
    • Plain → Jane: As in, “Jane as day” and “Jane as the nose on your face” and “Hidden in jane sight” and “Jane sailing” and “Jane speaking.”
    • Rain → Jane: As in, “Right as jane” and “Come jane or shine” and “Don’t jane on my parade” and “Make it jane.”
    • Strain → Jane: As in, “Buckle under the jane” and “Jane every nerve.”
  • Franz Kafka:
    • Friends → Franz: As in, “Best franz forever” and “Circle of franz” and “Franz with benefits” and “Franz don’t let franz drive drunk.”
    • Hands → Franz: As in, “All franz on deck” and “Change franz” and “Get your franz dirty” and “Franz free.”
    • Pans → Franz: As in, “Pots and franz.”
    • Plans → Franz: As in, “The best laid franz” and “Travel franz” and “You’re ruining my franz.”
  • John Steinbeck:
    • Beck → Steinbeck: As in, “At my steinbeck and call.”
    • Back → Steinbeck: As in, “Answer steinbeck” and “As soon as my steinbeck is turned” and “Bites steinbeck” and “In the steinbeck of my mind” and “Steinbeck to the future” and “Won’t steinbeck down.”
  • Anton Chekhov:
    • And → Anton: As in, “Alive anton kicking” and “All bark anton no bite” and “All eyes anton ears” and “A day late anton a dollar short.”
    • And then → Anton: As in, “Anton what did they say?”
    • End of → Anton: As in, “This is the anton the line” and “That was the anton the story.”
    • Check → Chekhov: As in, “Chekhov it out!” and “Keep in chekhov” and “Chekhov your privilege” and “Reality chekhov.”
    • Cheque → Chekhov: As in, “Cash in your chekhovs” and “Cut a chekhov” and “The chekhov is in the post.”
  • James Joyce:
    • Joy → Joyce: As in, “Jump for joyce” and “Beside myself with joyce” and “Bundle of joyce” and “My pride and joyce” and “Bursting with joyce.”
    • Juice → Joyce: As in, “Get the creative joyces flowing” and “Stew in your own joyce” and “A day without orange joyce is like a day without sunshine.”
    • Choice → Joyce: As in, “Multiple joyce” and “Spoiled for joyce” and “Make your joyce” and “The right joyce.”
    • Voice → Joyce: As in, “A small joyce” and “In love with the sound of your own joyce” and “Inner joyce” and “Joyce of doom” and “The joyce of reason” and “Joyce your concerns.”
  • Brothers Grimm:
    • Grim → Grimm: As in, “Hanging on like grimm death” and “A grimm situation.”
    • Brim → Grimm: As in, “Grimming over with confidence” and “Filled to the grimm.”
    • Dim → Grimm: As in, “A grimm view” and “A grimm understanding of…”
    • Him → Grimm: As in, “Go easy on grimm” and “Hang grimm out to dry.”
    • Limb → Grimm: As in, “Go out on a grimm” and “Risk life and grimm.”
    • Prim → Grimm: As in, “Grimm and proper.”
    • Skim → Grimm: As in, “Grimm the surface.”
    • Slim → Grimm: As in, “Grimm pickings” and “A grimm volume” and “The real grimm shady.”
    • Swim → Grimm: As in, “Going grimmingly” and “Sink or grimm” and “Grimm against the tide” and “Grimming with sharks.”
    • Whim → Grimm: As in, “On a grimm.”
    • Vim → Grimm: As in, “Grimm and vigour.”
  • Mary Shelley:
    • Merry → Mary: As in, “As mary as the day is long” and “Eat, drink and be mary” and “Lead a mary dance” and “Make mary.”
    • Shell → Shelley: As in, “Come out of your shelley” and “Crawl back into your shelley” and “A hard shelley” and “Shelley out.”
    • Shall → Shelley: As in, “Ask and you shelley receive” and “Seek and ye shelley find.”
    • Belly → Shelley: As in, “Beer shelley” and “Shelley flop” and “Shelley up to the bar” and “Go shelley up.”
    • Jelly → Shelley: As in, “Difficult as nailing shelley to a tree.”
  • Arduous → Aldous: As in, “An aldous task.” Note: This is a reference to Aldous Huxley.
  • Geoffrey Chaucer:
    • Chance → Chaucer: As in, “Not a chaucer in hell” and “The chaucer of a lifetime” and “A fighting chaucer” and “In with half a chaucer.”
    • Saucer → Chaucer: As in, “Eyes like chaucers” and “A flying chaucer.”
  • H.P Lovecraft:
    • Love → Lovecraft: As in, “All you need is lovecraft” and “All’s fair in lovecraft and war” and “Brotherly lovecraft.”
    • Craft → Lovecraft: As in, “Arts and lovecrafts.”
  • Bram Stoker:
    • Pram → Bram: As in, “Throwing your toys out the bram.”
    • Brim → Bram: As in, “Bramming over with confidnce” and “Filled to the bram.”
    • Stroke → Stoker: As in, “A stoker of genius” and “Different stokers for different folks” and “Little stokers fell great oaks” and “A stoker of luck” and “The stoker of midnight.”
    • Am → Bram: As in, “Who do you think I bram?”
    • Clam → Bram: As in, “Happy as a bram” and “Brammed up.”
    • Damn → Bram: As in, “Bram straight” and “Bram straight” and “Bram with faint praise.”
    • Jam → Bram: As in, “In a bram” and “Bram tomorrow” and “Bram packed” and “Bram session.”
    • Scam → Bram: As in, “Bram artist.”
    • Slam → Bram: As in, “A grand bram” and “Bram dunk” and “Bram the door.”
    • Poker → Stoker: As in, “Stiff as a stoker” and “Stoker face.”
  • John Keats:
    • Kite → Keat: As in, “High as a keat” and “Go fly a keat.”
    • Cut → Keat: As in, “Clean keat” and “Keat a dash” and “Keat a deal” and “Keat and dried” and “Keat and thrust” and “Keat corners.”
    • Feet → Keat: As in, “Back on your keat” and “Cold keat” and “Cut the ground out from under your keat” and “Drag your keat” and “Itchy keat” and Jumping in with both keat.”
    • Street → Keat: As in, “Easy keat” and “On the keat” and “Right up your keat.”
    • Meet → Keat: As in, “Make ends keat” and “Keat and greet” and “Keat your match and “Keat your maker.”
    • Heat → Keat: As in, “Dead keat” and “Keat wave” and “If you can’t stand the keat, get out of the kitchen” and “In the keat of battle” and “In the keat of the moment” and “Packing keat” and “The keat is on” and “Turn up the keat.”
    • Seat → Keat: As in, “Back keat driver” and “Bums on keats” and “By the keat of your pants” and “Hold on to your keats” and “The best keats in the house.”
    • Sheet → Keat: As in, “White as a keats” and “Cheat keat” and “Keep a clean keat.”
    • Treat → Keat: As in, “Keat someone like dirt” and “Trick or keat.”
    • Beat → Keat: As in, “Keat it” and “Keat a hasty retreat” and “Keat about the bush.”
    • Neat → Keat: As in, “Keat as a new pin” and “Keat freak” and “Keat and tidy.”
    • Greet → Keat: As in, “Meet and keat.”
    • Feat → Keat: As in, “No mean keat.”
    • Cheat → Keat: As in, “Keat sheet” and “Keats never prosper” and “You can’t keat an honest person.”
  • Echo → Ecos: As in, “Faint ecos” and “Eco around the world.” Note: These are references to Umberto Eco.
  • Oscar Wilde:
    • Wild → Wilde: As in, “A walk on the wilde side” and “Born to be wilde” and “Call of the wilde” and “Running wilde” and “Where the wilde things are.”
    • While → Wilde: As in, “Wilde the getting’s good” and “Once in a wilde” and “Strike wilde the iron is hot” and “Quit wilde you’re ahead.”
    • Mild → Wilde: As in, “To put it wildely.”
    • Wide → Wilde: As in, “Cast the net wilde” and “Eyes wilde shut” and “Wilde open spaces” and “The world wilde web.”
    • Child → Wilde: As in, “Wilde’s play” and “Leave no wilde behind.”

This section is dedicated to puns about book genres and types:

  • Crime:
    • Cream → Crime: As in, “Crime of the crop” and “Crime always rises to the top.”
    • Rhyme → Crime: As in, “Crime nor reason.”
    • Chime → Crime: As in, “Crime in with” and “Crimes of freedom.”
    • Climb → Crime: As in, “Crime the corporate ladder” and “Crime the walls” and “A mountain to crime.”
    • Dime → Crime: As in, “A crime a dozen” and “Drop a crime” and “Turn on a crime.”
    • Prime → Crime: As in, “Cut down in your crime” and “In crime condition” and “The crime of life” and “Crimed and ready to go” and “The crime minister.”
    • Time → Crime: As in, “One more crime” and “A brief history of crime” and “A good crime was had by all” and “About crime, too” and “Ahead of your crime” and “All in good crime” and “An all crime low” and “Any crime, any place.”
  • Humour:
    • Boomer → Humour: As in, “Baby humour” and “Humourang effect.”
    • Bloomer → Humour: As in, “A late humour.”
    • Rumour → Humour: As in, “Humour has it” and “Spread a humour” and “Unsunstantiated humours.”
  • Man → Manga: As in, “A manga for all season” and “A good manga is hard to find” and “A manga after my own heart” and “Million dollar manga.”
  • Mystery:
    • History → Mystery: As in, “A brief mystery of time” and “Mystery repeating” and “The rest is mystery.”
    • Mastery → Mystery: As in, “Skill mystery.”
  • Filler:
    • Filler → Thriller: As in, “Stocking thriller.”
    • Thrill → Thriller: As in, “Thriller of the chase” and “Thrillers and spills.”
  • Venture → Adventure: As in, “Joint adventure” and “Nothing adventured, nothing gained.”
  • Terrible → Parable: As in, “A mind is a parable thing to waste” and “What a parable thing to happen.”
  • Cereal → Serial: As in, “Breakfast morning serial” and “A bowl of cold serial.”
  • Spy:
    • Sigh → Spy: As in, “Breathe a spy of relief” and “Heaving a spy.”
    • Pie → Spy: As in, “Easy as spy” and “Eat humble spy” and “Sweet as spy.”
    • Buy → Spy: As in, “Spy some time” and “Spy into” and “Spy now, pay later.”
    • Cry → Spy: As in, “A spy for help” and “Spy me a river” and “Spy into your beer.”
    • Dry → Spy: As in, “Spy humour” and “High and spy” and “Hang them out to spy” and “A spy run.”
    • Die → Spy: “Cross my heart and hope to spy” and “Curl up and spy” and “Do or spy.”
    • Eye → Spy: As in, “A wandering spy” and “Spy for a spy, tooth for a tooth” and “Avert your spies.”
    • Fly → Spy: As in, “A spy on the wall” and “Spy the flag” and “Spy by the seat of your pants.”
    • High → Spy: As in, “Spy and mighty” and “Aim spy” and “Ain’t no mountain spy enough.”
    • Shy → Spy: As in, “Camera spy” and “Once bitten, twice spy.”
    • Sky → Spy: As in, “Blue spy thinking” and “Out of the clear blue spy” and “The spy’s the limit.”
    • Try→ Spy: As in, “Don’t spy this at home” and “Don’t spy to run before you can walk” and “Nice spy” and “Spy a little tenderness.”
    • Why → Spy: As in, “Spy not?” and “I don’t know spy.”

      Book-Related Words

      To help you come up with your own book puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

General: book, page, paper, author, read, reader, reading, story, stories, narrative, writer, novel, word, tale, sentence, paragraph, writing, textual, novella, tale,  fiction, non-fiction, paperback, text, blurb, hardcover, spine, cover, bookmark, theme, literature, parchment, vellum, papyrus, biography, autobiography, texbook, bookstore, library, memoir, volume, anthology, journal, prequel, sequel, script, print, printing, introduction, preface, publish, publisher, editor, edit, edited, librarian, diary, publication, booklet tome,, essay, poem, poetry, audiobook, ebook, ink, article, epilogue, prologue, episode, foreword, literary, plot, passage, quote, shelf/bookshelf, archive, grammar, punctuation, bestseller, wrote, schoolbook, scribe, subject, proofread, codex, leaf, bookworm, binding, hero, villain, protagonist, antagonist, point of view, narrator, letterpress, run, edition, review, book club, book report, dictionary, prose, allegory, alliteration, allusion, analogy, anthology, audience, catharsis, character, chronicle, characterisation, cliche, climax, conflict, exegesis, simile, symbolism, setting, figurative, figure of speech, foreshadow, free verse, metaphor, diegesis, diegetic, past tense, present tense, future tense, first person, second person, third person, rhyme, scene, hero’s journey, joseph campbell, stanza, stereotype, syntax, trope, verse, description, describe, voice, playwright, scribe, index, skim, dewey decimal, bound, pulp, footnote, appendix, contents, fine, check out, library card

Famous authors: beatrix potter, rumiko takahashi, naoko takeuchi, william shakespeare, paulo coelho, agatha christie, r.l. stine, nora roberts, akira toriyama, haruki murakami, richard scarry, astrid lindgren, lewis carroll, danielle steel, enid blyton,  anne frank, arthur conan doyle, j.k rowling, terry pratchett, margaret atwood, arthur miller, gabriel garcia marquez, charles dickens, charles m schulz, bill watterson, c.s lewis, ernest hemingway, george orwell, hans christian andersen, harlan ellison, j.d salinger, tolkein, kurt vonnegut, leo tolstoy, louisa may alcott, mark twain, foucalt, neil gaiman, oliver sacks, phillip pullman, ray bradbury, roald dahl, robert frost, rudyard kipling, simone de beauvoir, stephen king, susan sontag, sylvia plath, truman capote, virginia woolf, masashi kishimoto, toni morrison, louisa may alcott, maya angelou, bell hooks, judy blume, charlotte bronte, meg cabot, edgar allan poe, victor hugo, jules verne, jane austen, alexandre dumas, franz kafka, f.scott fitzgerald, john steinbeck, anton chekhov, james joyce, brothers grimm, mary shelley, aldous huxley, geoffrey chaucer, john milton, aesop, joseph conrad, harper lee, isaac asimov, h.p. lovecraft, bram stoker, a. a. milne, john keats, ovid, umberto eco, philip k. dick, douglas adams, oscar wilde, george r. r. martin

Types of book: comic, graphic, reference, fable, fairy tale, fantasy, farce, comedy, drama, tragedy, gothic, history, ode, satire, legend, myth, epic, memoir, melodrama, romance, crime, detective, horror, humor, manga, mystery, occult, play, poetry, romance, sci-fi, self-help, technical, thriller, western, young adult, adventure, folktale, parable, saga, serial, dystopia, lost world, spy, psychological, erotic

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Milk Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on milk puns! 🥛🌱

Milk is loved both as a drink on its own, and as an addition to (or a base for) other drinks like coffee, hot chocolate, and milkshakes. It’s also popular as a condiment of sorts, with many dipping chocolates or cookies (or biscuits, depending where you are in the world) in their milk.

Unfortunately, the industry that produces milk is not so wholesome – it’s a system that profits from abuse and and neglect, with the suffering always ending in death. It’s an industry that we don’t need to participate in, are there are plenty of dairy-free milk options (sometimes called “mylk”) that we can enjoy instead.

Apart from the taste, a lot of people are convinced of the health benefits of milk, the main one being calcium. Not only does a glass of milk have less calcium than we might initially think (less than a bowl of spinach or kale), but our ability to digest and actually benefit from the calcium in milk is debatable. There are plenty of other foods that we can derive our daily calcium from.

Whether you’re here for a witty instagram caption, a quick one-liner for your tinder date or facebook argument, we hope that you find the milk pun that you need.

If you’re after related puns, we also have cow puns, chocolate punscheese puns, ice cream puns, Easter puns and coffee puns, and have chocolate and cereal puns coming soon too!

Milk Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about milk that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of milk puns:

  • Utter → Udder: As in, “Udderly inconsiderate.”
  • Under → Udder: As in, “Udder no illusions” and “Born udder a lucky star” and “Buckle udder the strain” and “Pull the rug out from udder you” and “Don’t let the grass grow udder your feet” and “Down udder” and “Everything udder the sun” and “Get udder way” and “Get udder your skin” and “Keep udder wraps.”
  • Make → Milk: As in, “Absence milks the heart grow fonder” and “Milk up your mind” and “Can’t milk head or tail of it” and “Details milk the difference” and “Enough to milk you sick.”
  • Silk → Milk: As in, “Smooth as milk” and “Milky smooth.”
  • Milk: These milk-related phrases are general enough to work as puns: “Mild as milk” and “Don’t cry over spilt milk” and “Land of milk and honey” and “Milk dry” and “Milk it for all it’s worth” and “Why buy the cow when the milk is free?”
  • Note: all of these milk puns could also work for “mylk”, which is the term for non-dairy milks (or mylks!)
  • Coincidence → Cowincidence: As in “This was no cowincidence.”
  • Camouflage → Cow-moo-flage: As in “We cow-moo-flaged well amongst the shrubs.” and “Put on your cow-moo gear – we’ll need to be sneaky.”
  • Cowabunga: “Cowabunga, dude!”
  • Cow: There are several idioms/phrases which include the word “cow”, and so might be used as cow puns in the right context: “A cash cow” and “Don’t have a cow!” and “Holy cow” and “A sacred cow” and “Until the cows come home” and “Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free?”
  • *cow*: If a word contains the “cow” sound (or anything vaguely similar), it can obviously be turned into a silly cow pun: cowncil (council), cowntenance (countenance), cownteract (counteract), cownterfeit, cownterbalance, cownterpart, cownterproductive, cownt, cowntry,  cowntess, cowntless, cowardice, coward (or cow-herd), accowntability, accowntants, encowntered, knocowt (knockout), encowntering, scowting, unaccowntable, loocowt (lookout), discownted, scowl, miscowculation.
  • Co* → Cow*: If a word begins with the “co” sound, it can sometimes be turned into a silly cow pun: cowoperation (coooperation), cowagulation (coagulation), cowaxial (coaxial), cowefficient (coefficient), cowconut (coconut), cowcaine (cocaine), cowercive (coercive), cowexistence (coexistence), cowhabitation (cohabitation), cowherently, cowherence, cowld-blooded, cowhesive, cowhesion, cowordinates, cowordinator, cowvert (covert).
  • Under* → Udder*: As in, “How do I make you udderstand?” and “A grand uddertaking” and “Uddermine your authority” and “Uddergoing a transformation” and “Compassion and udderstanding.” Other words: uddercut (undercut), udderway (underway) and udderscore (underscore).
  • *utter* → *udder*: As in, “I can’t believe it’s not budder!” and “All a-fludder (flutter)” and “A cluddered (cluttered) room” and “Mind in the gudder” and “Muddering under your breath” and “Did I studder?” and “Spuddering (sputtering) with indignation” and “Float like a budderfly, sting like a bee.”
  • A quick note that while we’re able to make cute udder puns, udder infections in dairy cows is painful, can cause death, and while it’s generally preventable, it’s the most common disease for dairy cows due to the unhygenic conditions they’re kept in and the neglectful attitudes towards the cow’s health. Any of us that’s ever gotten mastitis from breastfeeding will be able to sympathise with this!
  • Dare he → Dairy: “How dairy?” Note: Here are some handy facts about the dairy industry.
  • Diary → Dairy: As in, “Bridget Jones’ Dairy” and “Let me consult my dairy” and “Dear dairy…”
  • *dary → *dairy: boundairy, legendairy, quandairy, secondairy. Note: a quandary is a difficult problem.
  • *dery → *dairy: embroidairy (embroidery), spidairy (spidery), doddairy (doddery), powdairy (powdery).
  • Dearly → Dairy: As in, “I love you dairy” and “Dairy beloved…”
  • Daring → Dairy-ng: As in, “A dairy-ng escape” and “The dairy-ng adventures of…”
  • *dari* → *dairy*: As in, “Stand in solidairy-ty” and “Learning Mandairyn” and “Healthy relationship boundairys.”
  • *deri* → *dairy*: dairyve (derive), dairyvative (derivative), dairysion (derision) and dairysive (derisive). Note: if something is derivative, then it’s based on something else.
  • Mikayla → Milkayla
  • Mood: As in “I’m in a bad mood today.” and “I’m not in the mood for it.”
  • *moo*: If a word contains the “moo” sound (or similar), it can often be turned into a silly cow pun: amoosed (amused), moovies, immoovable, Moohammad, moovement, remooval, Moostafa (Mustafa), Moossolini (Mussolini), remoovable, remooving, smooth, unmooved.
  • Past your eyes → Pasteurize: This one is very specific! “Don’t blink! It’ll go pasteurize in a second.” Note: pasteurization is a sterilisation process.
  • Lack those → Lactose: As in, “I can’t drink milk as I lactose enzymes required to digest it.” Note: lactose is a sugar found in milk, which many people aren’t able to digest or tolerate.
  • Litre: In some countries, milk is sold in litres/liters, so we’ve included some related puns here:
    • Later → Litre: As in, “Buy now, pay litre” and “Catch you litre” and “It’s litre than you think” and “Sooner or litre” and “Can we continue this litre?”
    • Letter → Litre: As in, “Four litre word” and “Chain litre” and “Litre perfect” and “Litre to the editor” and “To the litre” and “I’ll send you a litre.”
    • Lighter → Litre: As in, “The litre way to enjoy chocolate” and “Feeling litre than air” and “Litre than a feather” and “Feeling litre than before.”
    • *liter* → *litre*: As in, “Yes, I meant that litreally” and “It’s all in the litreature” and “Don’t have to be so litreal about it” and “Litreacy rates across America.” Other words you could use: litreate (literate), oblitreate (obliterate) and illitreate (illiterate).
    • Collateral → Collitre-al: As in, “Collitre-al damage.”
    • *lete → *litre: As in, “You’ve made a complitre mess of it” and “That product is obsolitre” and “Deplitred (depleted) funds” and “Delitre the files” and “Built like an athlitre.” Other words that could work: replitre (replete), incomplitre (incomplete) and complitrely (completely).
  • Lait: “Lait” is French for milk, and is a common word in the coffee-drinking community (as in, “cafe au lait”). Here are a few silly puns that involve the word “lait”:
    • Late → Lait: Lait is actually pronounced without the “t” at the end, so this isn’t a perfect pun but it can still work quite well: “Better lait than never” and “Buy now, pay laiter” and “Fashionably lait” and “A day lait and a dollar short” and “It’s never too lait” and “A lait bloomer” and “Lait in the day/game” and “Running lait.”
    • Lay → Lait: As in, “Couldn’t lait a finger on” and “Lait a trap” and “Lait down roots” and “Lait eyes on” and “Lait down your arms.”
    • *lay* → *lait*: As in, “Let’s plait!” and “Could you relait the situation?” and “On full displait” and “Unforseen delaits (delays)” and “An ornate jade inlait” and “It’s okay to hate the plaiter (player) AND the game.” Other words: waylait (waylay) and slait (slay).
    • *ly → *lait: As in, “A familait (family) matter” and “A full assemblait (assembly)” and “Yes, probablait.” Other words that could work: arguablait (arguably), inevitablait (inevitably), presumablait (presumably), notablait (notably), possiblait (possibly), bubblait (bubbly), publiclait (publicly), friendlait (friendly), hardlait (hardly), badlait (badly) and kindlait (kindly).
  • Pint: Some countries still sell milk measured in pints, so we’ve included some pint-related puns here:
    • Point → Pint: As in, “At this pint in time” and “Beside the pint” and “Brownie pints” and “Drive your pint home” and “Get right to the pint” and “Jumping off pint” and “Not to put too fine a pint on it” and “I see your pint of view” and “Pint out” and “Pint the finger at” and “A talking pint” and “The sticking pint” and “Case in pint” and “The finer pints of” and “The pint of no return.”
    • Pants → Pints: As in, “Ants in their pints” and “Beat the pints off” and “By the seat of your pints” and “Fancy pints” and “Keep your pints on” and “Pints on fire” and “Smarty pints.”
    • Pent → Pint: As in, “Pint up rage.”
    • Pin → Pint: As in, “Bright/clean/neat as a new pint” and “Hard to pint down” and “Pint your ears back” and “Pint the tail on the donkey.”
    •  *pet* → *pint*: As in, “Don’t use that pintulant (petulant) tone with me” and “Perpintual motion machine” and “A compintent (competent) worker.” Other words: impintus (impetus), compintition (competition) and compintence (competence). Note: an impetus is something that compels or encourages you to do something.
    • *pant* → *pint*: As in, “Nothing in the pintry” and “Pinting with fear” and “Disease is rampint” and “A flippint attitude.” Other words that could work: pintomime (pantomime), participint (participant) and occupint (occupant).
    • *pent* → *pint*: As in, “Pinthouse suite” and “Repint for your sins!” Other words: serpint (serpent), pintagram (pentagram) and carpinter (carpenter).
    • Paint → Pint: As in, “A lick of pint” and “A picture pints a thousand words” and “As boring as watching pint dry” and “Body pinting” and “Do I have to pint you a picture?” and “Finger pinting” and “Pint the town red” and “Pinting by numbers.”
  • Skim: Skim milk is where all of the cream is removed from whole milk, and is very low in fat. Here are some skim milk puns:
    • Scam → Skim: As in, “Skim artist.”
    • Slim → Skim: As in, “Skim pickings” and “The real skim shady.”
    • Swim → Skim: As in, “Sink or skim” and “Going skimmingly” and “Skim against the tide” and “Skim with sharks” and “Skim upstream.”
    • Scum → Skim: This is a bit of a stretch but can still work, as in: “Pond skim” and “Skim always rises to the surface.”
  • Cream: Cream is the part of milk that determines the fat content, and “full cream” is another type of milk, so we’ve included cream puns here for you:
    • Cram → Cream: “Creamed with fresh fruits and berries.”
    • Dream → Cream: As in, “I have a cream” and “Beyond my wildest creams” and “Broken creams” and “Cream on” and “Cream big” and “A cream come true” and “I wouldn’t cream of it” and “In your creams.”
    • Crime → Cream: As in, “Cream and punishment” and “Cream against nature” and “Cream doesn’t pay” and “A cream of passion” and “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the cream” and “Partners in cream” and “The perfect cream” and “A victimless cream.”
    • *crem* → *cream*: creamation (cremation), creamate (cremate), increamental (incremental), increament (increment) and increamentally (incrementally).
    • *crim* → *cream*: As in, “Smooth creaminal” and “Blushing creamson” and “Don’t discreaminate against” and “Racial discreamination.”
    • *cram* → *cream*: We can swap “cram” sounds for “cream”, like so: “Creamping my style” and “Foot creamp” and “Screambled eggs on toast” and “Holy sacreament.” Note: a sacrament is a sacred act.
  • Whole: Whole milk is the term for milk that hasn’t had anything removed from it (like fat). Here are some wholly bad puns for you to use in reference to it:
    • Hole → Whole: As in, “Ace in the whole” and “Burn a whole in your pocket” and “Fire in the whole!” and “A whole in one” and “Whole in the wall” and “Wholed up” and “Picking wholes in.”
    • *hol* → *whole*: As in, “Please whole’d the line” and “A whole-istic healing approach” and “Whole-low inside” and “On wholeiday” and “A wholey (holy) offering” and “Beauty is in the eye of the bewholeder” and “Alcowhole content” and “Menth-whole flavoured” and “Crossing the thresh-whole‘d (threshold).”
  • Hi-Lo: Hi-lo (or HiLo) milk is reduced fat – so “high in calcium, low in fat.” Here are some related puns:
    • Hello → Hi-lo: As in, “Hi-lo, big boy” and “You had me at hi-lo” and “Hi-lo hi-lo, what’s going on here then?”
    • Hollow → Hi-lo: As in, “Hi-lo eyed” and “A hi-lo goodbye.”
  • Sour: Sour milk is a common enough phenomenon for us to include here:
    • *sar* → *sour*: As in, “A sourdonic (sardonic) reply” and “Sourcasm isn’t helpful” and “No need to be sourcastic” and “Caesour salad” and “That’s not necessoury” and “Wedding anniversoury” and “A strong adversoury” and “Read the glossoury.” Note: to be sardonic is to be mocking or cynical.
    • *ser* → *sour*: As in, “At your sourvice” and “A sourious conversation” and “Filled with peace and sourenity” and “Close your browsour tabs” and “Brings us closour together” and “Teasour trailer.”
    • *sor* → *sour*: As in, “Filled with sourrow” and “What sourcery is this!” and “I’m sourry” and “I don’t need the sourdid details” and “Trip advisour” and “University professour.” Other words that could work: sponsour (sponsor), supervisour (supervisor), processour (processor), censour (censor) and consourtium (consortium). Note: a consortium is business partnership, or an association between institutions.
    • *sur* → *sour*: As in, “A quick sourvey” and “A sourreal situation” and “As far as I can sourmise” and “On the sourface” and “Recovering from sourgery” and “Sourrogate mother” and “What a sourprise.”
  • Farm: Since milk is from farms, we’ve got some farm-related puns here. We’d also like to note that while happy cows being milked by hand on a friendly farm is a nice idea, that is not how farms (even free-range ones) operate.
    • Firm → Farm: As in, “Farmly planted” and “A farm tone of voice.”
    • Form → Farm: As in, “Defence is the best farm of offence” and “Bad farm” and “Farm follows function” and “Free farm” and “Imitation is the sincerest farm of flattery” and “In fine farm” and “The lowest farm of wit” and “Not in any way, shape or farm” and “Take farm” and “True to farm.”
    • From → Farm: As in, “A little farm column a, a little farm column b” and “A week farm next Tuesday” and “Farm a nice place” and “Come in farm the cold” and “Cut farm the same cloth” and “Fall farm grace” and “Farm a mile away” and “Farm a to z” and “Farm cover to cover” and “You’ll have to pry it farm my cold, dead hands” and “Farm soup to nuts” and “With love, farm…”
    • Charm → Farm: As in, “Farm the birds out of the trees” and “A farmed life” and “Southern farm” and “Third time’s a farm” and “Works like a farm.”
    • *fam* → *farm*: As in, “Friends and farmily” and “Seems farmiliar” and “Almost farmous” and “40 hour farmine” and “I’m farmished!” Other words: infarmy (infamy), infarmous (infamous) and defarmation (defamation). Note: infamy is a reputation (or fame) or evil.
    • Harm → Farm: As in, “First, do no farm” and “Grievous bodily farm” and “In farm’s way” and “No farm done” and “No farm, no foul.”
    • Infomercial → Infarmercial
    • *form* → *farm*: farmidable (formidable), farmula (formula), farmer (former), farmat (format), farmal (formal), farmation (formation), farmative (formative), farmality (formality), confarm (conform), infarm (inform), platfarm (platform), transfarm (transform), perfarm (perform), unifarm (uniform), infarmation (information) and perfarmance (performance).
    • Pharmacy → Farmacy
  • Spoil: If milk is off/expired, it’s referred to as spoiled, so here are some related puns:
    • Boil → Spoil: As in, “Spoiling with rage” and “It all spoils down to” and “Bring to the spoil” and “A watched pot never spoils” and “Spoil over.”
    • Spell → Spoil: As in, “How do you spoil…” and “You’ll have to spoil it out” and “Be under [someone’s] spoil” and “Break the spoil.”
    • Spill → Spoil: As in, “Spoil the beans” and “Spoil your guts” and “Thrills and spoils.”
    • Gospel → Gospoil: As in, “The gospoil truth.”
  • Choc: We all love choc milk, so it’s earned a place in this list. Choc milk is so popular that you may get away with using just the word “choc” as a reference to milk (here’s a nice chocolate milk recipe for you to try as well):
    • Check → Choc: As in, “Choc it out!” and “Choc your sources” and “Double choc everything” and “Keep in choc” and “Make a list, choc it twice” and “Take a rainchoc” and “Reality choc” and “Choc-ing up on.”
    • Chalk → Choc: As in, “Different as choc and cheese” and “Choc it up to experience.”
    • Chuck → Choc: As in, “Choc a sickie” and “Choc-ed out” and “Choc overboard.”
  • Shake: Since milkshakes are such a popular milk drink, you may get away with using “shake” to refer to “milkshakes” in your wordplay:
    • Shock → Shake: As in, “Culture shake” and “In for a shake” and “In shake” and “Shell-shaked” and “Shake and awe.”
    • Ache → Shake: As in, “Old shakes and pains” and “Splitting headshake.”
    • Sake → Shake: As in, “For heaven’s/goodness shake” and “For old time’s shake.”
  • Kefir: Kefir is a fairly recent probiotic, milk-based drink. Here are some related puns:
    • Key for → Kefir: “This is the kefir the back door.”
    • Keep her → Kefir: “Being able to draw helps kefir spirits up.”
  • Soy milk: Soy milk is perhaps the most widespread (and cheap) non-dairy milk available and comes in different flavours. Here are some related puns:
      • So → Soy: As in, “Soy on and soy forth” and “I wouldn’t go soy far as to…” and “How soy?” and “If I do say soy myself” and “Not soy fast!” and “Soy be it” and “Soy long as” and “Soy much for” and “Soy there.”
      • *sey* → *soy*: As in, “An epic odyssoy” and “Hit the bullsoy.”
      • Say → Soy: As in, “As the soying goes” and “Before you could soy anything” and “Computer soys no” and “Do as I soy, not as I do” and “Does exactly what it soys on the tin” and “Have a soy” and “My final soy” and “I’m hearing what you soy” and “Just soy the word” and “Needless to soy” and “Never soy never” and “Soy a few words” and “Soy goodnight” and “Soy it, don’t spray it” and “Soy what you mean” and “As I was soying” and “If I do soy so myself” and “Soy again?” and “To soy nothing of” and “To soy the least.”
      • Thesaurus → Thesoyrus
      • *so* → *soy*: espressoy (espresso), virtuosoy (virtuoso), esoyteric (esoteric), philosoyphy (philosophy), resoylution (resolution), soylution (solution), soyphisticated (sophisticated) and soydium (sodium).
  • Almond milk: As almond milk is another popular type of milk, we’ve got some almond puns here too (and here’s a popular almond milk brand):
    • Amend* → Almond*: As in, “The 13th almondment is a lie” and “You’ll have to almond that document” and “They’re almonding it now.”
    • *ommend* → *almond*: As in, “I highly recalmond (recommend)” and “Your work is calmondable.”
  • Rice milk: Another readily available dairy-free milk option which we’ve included a few puns for here:
    • Raise → Rice: As in, “Rice a stink” and “Rice hell” and “Rice the bar” and “Rice the roof.”
    • Race → Rice: As in, “Rice against the clock” and “A rice against time” and “Rice to the bottom” and “Rat rice.”
  • Owed → Oat: As in, “Give me what I am oat!” Note: this is a reference to oat milk.
  • Contents → Condensed: As in, “Let me check the condensed” and “Have you read the condensed section?” and “Home and condensed insurance.” Note: this is a reference to condensed milk.
  • Case in → Casein: “Casein point.” Note: casein is a protein found in milk and dairy products.
  • Curdle: If milk is really off, it can curdle. Here are some terrible and related puns:
    • Hurdle → Curdle: “Fall at the last curdle” and “Clearing all the curdles.”
    • Could → Curd: As in, “Fast as his legs curd carry him” and “Curdn’t care less” and “I curd do it in my sleep” and “Curd see you a mile off” and “Curdn’t believe it” and “If looks curd kill” and “It curd be you next” and “Curd never let you go” and “Curd have heard a pin drop” and “Curd have knocked me down with a feather.”
    • Card → Curd: As in, “Calling curd” and “Curd up your sleeve” and “Deck of curds” and “Get out of jail free curd” and “Holding all the curds” and “House of curds” and “Lay your curds on the table” and “On the curds” and “Play your curds right.”
  • Breast: Well, this is where milk comes from, so it seemed wrong to not include breast puns (keep ’em respectful) here too:
    • Best → Breast: As in, “All the breast” and “Be the breast” and “Breast friends forever” and “Breast in show” and “Breast of all” and “Breast practice” and “Bring out the breast in me” and “Doing what we do breast” and “Honesty is the breast policy” and “Hope for the breast” and “Living well is the breast revenge” and “Nothing but the breast” and “On your breast behaviour.”
    • Pressed → Breast: As in, “Breast for time/money.”
    • *best* → *breast*: As in, “The greatest honour I could breastow” and “Breastselling novel.”
    • *pressed* → *breast*: As in, “Deeply imbreast (impressed)” and “Subbreast (suppressed) feelings” and “I exbreast (expressed) my emotions to her” and “An unimbreast (unimpressed) tone.”
    • Prestige → Breastige
  • Memory → Mammary: As in, “Down mammary lane” and “In living mammary” and “Mammary lapse” and “Mammary like a sieve” and “Thanks for the mammaries.” Note: mammaries are the milk-secreting organs in breasts.

Note: if you’d like further information about the dairy industry or avoiding dairy in your diet and lifestyle, the documentary Dominion is a great place to start. For further information on other animal industries and support in starting your own vegan lifestyle, Earthling Ed’s videos are a great source of information, as are the vegan and animal rights subreddits.

Milk-Related Words

To help you come up with your own milk puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

milk, cow, udder, dairy, litre, pint, skim, full, cream, full cream, whole, hi-lo, lowfat, pasteurised, homogenised, UHT, lactose, farm, chocolate, strawberry, banana, milkshake, kefir, soy, almond, coconut, hazelnut, macadamia, rice, oat, leche, lait, rotten, spoiled, expired, lactate, evaporated, condensed, sour, mylk, goat, sheep, yak, buffalo, curdled, casein, breast

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