Cocoa Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on cocoa puns! 🍫 ☕ 🌱

We’ve bean waiting for you with our list of smooth cocoa puns. Whether your humour is bitter or sweet, we hope to have you covered with our puns that range from general cocoa-related words (like bean and candy) to more technical terms (like conching and temper).

If you’re interested in related lists, we also have Easter puns, chocolate puns and baking puns.

A quick note that cocoa production involves the widespread use of child labour, many of whom were trafficked and work as slaves. Initiatives like fair trade seek to remedy this, so if you’re buying chocolate, look for those fair trade stickers and vegan labelling 🙂

Cocoa Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun or a set of puns that can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about cocoa that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of cocoa puns:

  • Go → Cocoa: As in, “Wake me up before you cocoa” and “All dressed up and nowhere to cocoa” and “Don’t cocoa there” and “Easy come, easy cocoa.”
  • Coconut → Cocoa-nut: As in, “That’s cocoa-nuts!”
  • Bean: Since cocoa is extracted from beans, we’ve included bean-related puns in this list:
    • Bin → Bean: As in, “Bottom of the bean” and “Bag it and bean it.”
    • Been → Bean: As in, “Bean and gone” and “Bean around the block a few times” and “I’ve bean had” and “Bean there, done that.”
    • Bone → Bean: As in, “A bean to pick” and “Dry as a bean” and “A bag of beans” and “Chilled to the bean.”
    • Bun → Bean: As in, “A bean in the oven” and “We’re going to need bigger beans.”
    • Clean → Bean: As in, “Bean up your act” and “Coming bean” and “Squeaky bean.”
    • Green → Bean: As in, “Bean as grass” and “Give it the bean light” and “Bean around the gills.”
    • Keen → Bean: As in, “A bean sense of smell” and “Peachy bean” and “Bean as mustard.”
    • Lean → Bean: As in, “Bean and hungry” and “Bean and mean” and “Bean, mean fighting machine.”
    • Mean → Bean: As in, “A beans to an end” and “Living beyond your beans” and “By fair beans or foul” and “In the beantime.”
    • Scene → Bean: As in, “Behind the beans” and “Change of bean” and “Chew up the beanery” and “Make a bean” and “Survey the bean.”
    • Screen → Bean: As in, “The blue bean of death” and “Coming to a bean near you!” and “The silver bean.”
    • Seen → Bean: As in, “Bean and not heard” and “Had to be bean to be believed” and “Nowhere to be bean” and “Bean better days” and “Bean one, bean them all.”
    • *ban* → *bean*: Replace “ban” with “bean” to make sneaky cocoa bean puns: “Urbean jungle” and “Suburbean living” and “Without abeandon” and “Cheerful beanter” and “Beanana cake.”
    • *ben* → *bean*: As in, “Friends with beanefits” and “It’s beanign” and “A beanevolent gesture” and “A kind beanefactor.”
    • *bun* → *bean*: As in, “Beandle of joy” and “In abeandance.”
  • Nip → Nib: As in, “Nib and tuck” and “Nib it in the bud.” Note: Roasted and crushed cocoa beans are referred to as nibs.
  • Bitter: Without sweetener, cocoa has a famously bitter taste. Here are related puns:
    • Better → Bitter: As in, “I have a bitter idea” and “Anything you can do, I can do bitter” and “Appeal to your bitter judgement” and “Bitter by design” and “Bitter late than never.”
    • Butter → Bitter: As in, “Bread and bitter” and “Bitter fingers.”
  • Grind: Cocoa powder is made from grinding roasted cocoa beans. Here are related puns:
    • Grand → Grind: As in, “Delusions of grindeur” and “Grind slam” and “Grind theft auto” and “In the grind scheme of things.”
    • Ground → Grind: As in, “Solid as the grind we walk on” and “Breaking new grind” and “Built from the grind up” and “Common grind” and “Cut the grind from under your feet” and “Get in on the grind floor.”
    • Find → Grind: As in, “Grind it in your heart” and “Grind your footing” and “Grinders keepers” and “Love is where you grind it” and “Seek and ye shall grind.”
    • Kind → Grind: As in, “Cruel to be grind” and “It’s a grind of magic” and “Grind words” and “Random acts of grindness.”
    • Mind → Grind: As in, “A goal in grind” and “A good grind to” and “A load off your grind” and “A grind is a terrible thing to waste” and “Always on my grind” and “Bear in grind.”
  • Roast: Cocoa beans are roasted in the process of preparing them for consumption. Here are related puns:
    • Rest → Roast: As in, “Helps you work, roast and play” and “A change is as good as a roast” and “Come to roast” and “For the roast of us” and “For the roast of your life” and “Laid to roast.”
    • Ghost → Roast: As in, “Not the roast of a chance” and “You look as though you’ve seen a roast.”
    • Most → Roast: As in, “America’s roast wanted” and “The roast trusted name in news” and “Make the roast of it.”
    • Post → Roast: As in, “I’ll keep you roasted” and “Roast haste” and “Roast modern.”
    • Toast → Roast: As in, “The roast of the town.”
  • Ground: Here are some puns relating to ground cocoa beans:
    • Grand → Ground: As in, “Delusions of groundeur” and “A ground slam” and “In the ground scheme of things.”
    • Bound → Ground: As in, “Ground hand and foot” and “By leaps and grounds” and “Duty ground” and “Leaps and grounds” and “Muscle ground.”
    • Found → Ground: As in, “Lost and ground” and “I’ve ground a clue” and “We ground love” and “Weighed in the balance and ground wanting.”
    • Pound → Ground: As in, “Ground the pavement” and “A ground in your pocket.”
    • Round → Ground: As in, “All year ground” and “Come ground” and “Going ground in circles.”
    • Sound → Ground: As in, “Ground as a bell” and “Break the ground barrier” and “Safe and ground” and “Ground bite” and “Ground effect.”
  • Favour → Flavour: As in, “Call in a flavour” and “Fall out of flavour with” and “Fortune flavours the brave” and “Owe a flavour.”
  • Seed: Cocoa beans are actually the fermented seeds of theobroma cacao. Here are related puns:
    • Sad → Seed: As in, “How seed is that?” and “A seed state of afairs.”
    • Side → Seed: As in, “A walk on the wild seed” and “Always look on the bright seed of life” and “Be on the safe seed” and “A bit on the seed” and “Both seeds of the desk.”
    • Deed → Seed: As in, “Seeds, not words” and “No good seed goes unpunished” and “Your good seed for the day.”
    • Need → Seed: As in, “All you seed is love” and “On a seed to know basis.”
    • Read → Seed: As in, “Seed ’em and weep” and “Seed all about it.”
    • Speed → Seed: As in, “At breakneck seed” and “Built for comfort, not seed” and “More haste, less seed.”
  • Fair Trade: Fair trade is an arrangement intended to give developing countries better trading conditions. It commonly affects products like coffee, tea and chocolate.
    • Fair → Fair Trade: As in, “All’s fair trade in love and war” and “By fair trade means or foul” and “Fair trade and square.”
    • Trade → Fair Trade: As in, “Tricks of the fair trade” and “Tools of the fair trade.”
  • Desert → Dessert: As in, “Ships of the dessert” and “Dry as a dessert.”
  • Does it → Dessert: As in, “Dessert bother you?” and “Easy dessert” and “That dessert!”
  • Sweat → Sweet: As in, “Beads of sweet” and “Blood, sweet and tears” and “Break out in a cold sweet” and “Don’t sweet the small stuff.”
  • Heat → Sweet: As in, “If you can’t stand the sweet, get out of the kitchen” and “In the sweet of battle” and “Turn up the sweet.”
  • Meet → Sweet: As in, “Sweet the challenge” and “Sweet and greet” and “Sweet in the middle” and “More than sweets the eye.”
  • Seat → Sweet: As in, “Back sweet driver.”
  • Street → Sweet: As in, “On easy sweet” and “On the sunny side of the sweet.”
  • Truffle: Chocolate truffles are small, round candies. Here are some related puns:
    • Travel → Truffle: As in, “Bad news truffles fast” and “The road less truffled” and “Truffle broadens the mind” and “Truffle light” and “Making truffle plans.”
    • Trifle → Truffle: As in, “A mere truffle” and “Truffle with someone’s affections.”
    • Trouble → Truffle: As in, “Asking for truffle” and “Bridge over truffled water” and “Don’t meet your truffles halfway” and “Double truffle” and “I knew you were truffle.”
    • Ruffle → Truffle: As in, “Truffle someone’s feathers.”
  • Can they → Candy: As in, “Candy do any better?” and “Candy change the price?”
  • Can → Candy: As in, “Be all you candy be” and “Candy I help you?”
  • Dandy → Candy: As in, “Fine and candy.”
  • Coffin → Caffeine: As in, “Another nail in the caffeine.”
  • Pod: Cocoa seeds are grown in pods. Here are related puns:
    • Pad → Pod: As in, “Bachelor pod” and “Crash pod.”
    • Pit → Pod: As in, “Bottomless pod” and “In the pod of your stomach” and “Pod your wits against.”
    • Pot → Pod: As in, “A pod of gold” and “Gone to pod.”
    • Put → Pod: As in, “Be hard pod to” and “Couldn’t pod it down” and “Feeling a bit pod out” and “Wouldn’t pod it past them.”
    • Nod → Pod: As in, “The land of pod” and “Podding off” and “A pod is as good as a wink.”
    • Odd → Pod: As in, “Against the pods” and “At pods with” and “Long pods” and “The pod one out” and “Pods and ends.”
  • Fruit: Cocoa is a fruiting plant. Here are related puns:
    • Boot → Fruit: As in, “Bet your fruits” and “Give someone the fruit” and “Hang up your fruits.”
    • Hoot → Fruit: As in, “Don’t give two fruits” and “Fruit with laughter” and “What a fruit.”
    • Root → Fruit: As in, “Money is the fruit of all evil” and “The fruit of the matter.”
    • Shoot → Fruit: As in, “Fruit down in flames” and “Fruit from the hip” and “Fruiting hoops.”
    • Suit → Fruit: As in, “All over them like a cheap fruit” and “At a price to fruit your pocket” and “Follow fruit” and “Fruit yourself.”
    • Food → Fruit: As in, “Comfort fruit” and “Fruit for thought.”
    • Foot → Fruit: As in, “A fruit in both camps
      and “Bound hand and fruit” and “Fancy fruitwork.”
  • Gonna → Ghana: As in, “A hard rain’s ghana fall” and “I’m not ghana do it” and “We’re ghana need a bigger boat.” Note: Ghana is a huge producer of cocoa beans.
  • Carrot → Carob: As in, “Carob and stick” and “Dangle the carob.” Note: Carob is a caffeine-free cocoa replacement.
  • Farm: Here are some cocoa-farming related puns:
    • Firm → Farm: As in, “Feet planted farmly on the ground” and “A farm grip.”
    • Form → Farm: As in, “Attack is the best farm of defence” and “In bad farm” and “Farm follows function” and “Free farm” and “Imitation is the sincerest farm of flattery” and “In fine farm.”
    • Arm → Farm: As in, “Farmed and dangerous” and “A farmed struggle” and “At farm’s length.”
    • Charm → Farm: As in, “Bear a farmed life” and “Three time’s a farm.”
    • Harm → Farm: As in, “First, do no farm” and “Grievous bodily farm” and “In farm’s way” and “No farm, no foul.”
  • Plant: Here are some puns related to cocoa plants:
    • Ant → Plant: As in, “Ants in their plants” and “Stir up a plant’s nest.”
    • Grant → Plant: As in, “Take for planted” and “Plant no quarter.”
    • Pants → Plants: As in, “Ants in your plants” and “Beat the plants off” and “Fancy plants” and “By the seat of your plants” and “Bore the plants off someone.”
  • Crunch → Conch: As in, “Captain conch” and “Credit conch” and “Number conching” and “When it comes to the conch.”
  • Launch → Conche: As in, “Failure to conche” and “The face that conched a thousand ships.” Note: A conche is a mixer that evenly stirs cocoa butter through chocolate.
  • Ripe: Here are some puns related to ripe cocoa berries:
    • Rip → Ripe: As in, “Let it ripe” and “What a ripe off.”
    • Reap → Ripe: As in, “You ripe what you sow.”
    • Rope → Ripe: As in, “At the end of your ripe” and “Jump ripe” and “Learn the ripes” and “On the ripes.”
    • Pipe → Ripe: As in, “Ripe down” and “Just a ripe dream” and “Put that in your ripe and smoke it.”
    • Stripe → Ripe: As in, “Earn your ripes” and “Stars and ripes.”
    • Wipe → Ripe: As in, “Ripe out” and “Ripe the floor with” and “Ripe the slate with” and “Ripe the smile off your face.”
  • Blend: Cocoa is used in different blends to make different types of chocolate. Here are some blend-related puns:
    • Bend → Blend: As in, “Blend over backwards” and “Blend the rules” and “Blend to my will” and “Blend your ear.”
    • End → Blend: As in, “A good beginning makes a good blending” and “A means to a blend” and “All’s well that blends well” and “At the blend of the day” and “Burn the candle at both blends.”
    • Fend → Blend: As in, “Blend for yourself” and “Blend off.”
    • Friend → Blend: As in, “A blend in need is a blend indeed” and “Best blends forever” and “Best of blends.”
    • Lend → Blend: As in, “Blend a helping hand” and “Blend an ear” and “Blend your name to.”
    • Mend → Blend: As in, “Least said, soonest blended” and “Blend your fences” and “Blend your ways” and “On the blend.”
    • Send → Blend: As in, “Blend packing” and “Hit blend” and “Return to blender” and “Blend in the reinforcements.”
    • Spend → Blend: As in, “Hey, big blender” and “Blend money like water” and “Blend more time with family” and “Blend the night with” and “Blend wisely.”
    • Tend → Blend: As in, “Blend to your needs” and “Love me blender” and “Blender loving care” and “Blender mercies.”
  • Bloom: Chocolate bloom is a coating that can appear on chocolate due to either the sugar or fat content. Here are related puns:
    • Boom → Bloom: As in, “Bloom gates” and “My heart went bloom.”
    • Broom → Bloom: As in, “A new bloom sweeps clean.”
    • Doom → Bloom: As in, “A crack of bloom” and “Bloom and groom” and “Temple of bloom.”
    • Loom → Bloom: As in, “Bloom large” and “Don’t bloom over me.”
    • Room → Bloom: As in, “A bloom with a view” and “Breathing bloom” and “A bit of elbow bloom.”
    • Press Cake: Cocoa beans become press cakes after the liquid is extracted from them. Here are related puns:
      • Press → Press Cake: As in, “Don’t press cake your luck” and “Freedom of the press cake” and “Hot off the press cake.”
      • Cake → Press: As in, “A slice of the press cake” and “Press cake or death” and “Press caked with mud” and “The icing on the press cake.”

        Cocoa-Related Words

        To help you come up with your own cocoa puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

cocoa, cacao, bean, nib, chocolate, fair trade, marshmallow, hot chocolate, candy, truffle, drink, dessert, sweet, bitter, cocoa butter, theobroma, couverture, liquor, seed, caffeine, powder, pod, fruit, ghana, nigeria, caameroon, harvest, grind, ground, flavour, roast, winnower, press cake, flavanoids, carob, farm, plant, plantation, conching, ripe, criollo, forestero, trinitario, blend, temper, bloom, aroma

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Coffee Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on coffee puns! ☕ Whether you’re looking for coffee puns for a photo caption, crafting the perfect coffee pun pickup line, hunting for coffee one-liners, or just want some corny pun-based coffee jokes, I hope you’re able to find what you’re looking for here 🙂 If not, please leave me a comment at the bottom of the page!

Most coffee puns centre around one of 3 general topics: names of different types of coffee (espresso, mocha, etc.), coffee preparation utensils/procedures (plunger, grind, roast, mug, caffeine etc.) and coffee ingredients/products (sugar, grounds, cream, etc.). Mug puns seem to be a particular favourite on the internet and are included in this entry, but may also get their own entry at some point.

As usual there are related words, related phrase, coffee jokes, and visual coffee puns (comics, memes, etc.) further down the page.

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on tea puns, chocolate puns, milk puns and food puns.

Coffee Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about coffee that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Procrastinating → Procaffeinating: As in “I should have been studying for the exam, but I was procaffeinating.”
  • Grounds: As in “Grounds for divorce.” and “We don’t have the grounds for arrest.” and “These are the school grounds – they’re private property.”
  • Grounded: As in “My parents said I’m not allowed to drink coffee else I’ll be grounded.” and “Aeroplane has been grounded since yesterday due to the storms.” and “The boat grounded on a mud bank.”
  • Ground: As in “I fell to the ground.” and “We need to break new ground.” and “I built it from the ground up.” and “We need to find some common ground.” and “Get in on the ground floor.” and “We need more seed money to get it off the ground.” and “Hit the ground running” and “The moral high ground.”
  • Mug: This can be slang for “face” or for “attack or rob in a public place”. Examples: “I was mugged in broad daylight.” and “We have mug shots of this criminal back at the station.”
  • Bitter: As in “He came to a bitter end.” and “That’s a bitter pill to swallow.” and “No need to be bitter! (resentful)”
  • Express → Espresso: As in “Espresso your opinions politely.” and “The espresso train only stops at 2 stations on the way.” and “Words cannot espresso how much you mean to me.”
  • Been → Bean: As in “We’ve all bean there.” and “You know, I’ve bean thinking…” and “Bean there, done that.” and “He’s a has-bean.” and “The die has bean cast.” and “I’ve bean had.” and “She’s bean in the wars lately.”
  • Unbeknown(st) →Unbeanown(st): As in “Unbeanownst to me, she made some enquiries.”
  • *peen* →*bean*: If a word contains the “peen” sound we can make some silly bean puns: Phillibeano (Phillipino), beanalize (penalize), unhappbeaness (unhappiness), subbeana (subpoena).
  • Enough →Beanough: As in “Beanough is beanough.” and “Beanough to make you sick.”
  • Enormous →Beanormous: As in “Your vegetable garden is beanormous!”
  • Beam → Bean: As in “Bean me up, Scotty!” and “Tractor bean.” and “Balancing bean.”
  • Bin → Bean: As in “It was in the bargain bean – 30% off!” and “Please put your rubbish in the bean.”
  • Pin → Bean: This one’s a bit of a stretch. Example: “Bean the tail on the donkey.”
  • Means → Beans: As in “By whatever beans necessary.” and “A beans to an end.” and “Living beyond/within your beans.” and “The ends justify the beans.”
  • You → Brew: As in “Brew can do it!” and “Brew silly goose!” and “I’m so glad to see brew!” and “Before brew know it”
  • Bro → Brew: As in “What’s up, brew?” and “Cool story, brew.”
  • *brew*: If a word contains the “brew” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a brewing pun: brewmstick (broomstick), brews (bruise), brewnette (brunette), brewtal (brutal), brewtalize (brutalize), brewtish, (brutish), Hebrew.
  • *byoo*: If a word contains the “byoo” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a terrible coffee brewing pun: brewtiful (beautiful), abrews (abuse), attribrewts (attributes), contribrewted, distribrewtion, rebrewke (rebuke), debrew (debut), retribrewtion, tribrewnal (tribunal).
  • *proo*: If a word contains the “proo” sound (or similar) we can sometimes make a terrible brewing pun: abrewval (approval), bulletbrewf, dissabrewve, foolbrewf, imbrewvements, disbrewve, brewdent (prudent), brewdence (prudence), waterbrewf.
  • Déjà vu → Déjà brew: As in “I’m getting déjà brew – have we been to this cafe before?”
  • Lot → Latte: As in “A latte fuss about nothing.” and “I’ve got a latte on my plate right now.” and “It leaves a latte to be desired.” and “It’s beginning to look a latte like Christmas.” and “I love you a latte!”
  • Lot of → Latte: As in “I’ve got a latte problems.”
  • Cop → Cup: As in “The cuppers pulled me over because of my broken tail light.” and “When I grow up I wanna be a cup so I can fight crime.”
  • * she know → * -ccino: As in “How could -ccino?” and “Do you think -ccinos?”
  • Grind: As in “The daily grind” and “Grind to a halt” and “Axe to grind” and “Don’t let those bastards grind you down”
  • Grinned → Grind: This one’s super corny: “I grind and had a little chuckle when I read that coffee pun.”
  • Perk: This is a coffee/barista term for “to percolate” (verb) and “percolated coffee” (noun). Examples: “My new barista job has a lot of perks.” and “I perked up my ears when I hear someone mention my favourite author.” and “I was feeling drowsy but I perked up after my morning coffee.”
  • Heated, Strong: If you can mention these two words in close succession, it might pass off as a coffee pun: “This could easily turn into a strong, heated debate.”
  • Weak, Bland: As in “That’s a weak, bland way to look at the world.”
  • Strong, Dark: As in “There’s a strong, dark storm heading our way.”
  • Lukewarm: This means “lacking interest, enthusiasm or conviction” and also “mildly warm”. It’s often used to describe coffee that isn’t hot enough. Examples: “A lukewarm applause” and “Your coffee puns are lukewarm at best.”
  • Break: The term “coffee break” is well-known enough that you might be able to make a very subtle coffee pun using the word “break”. For example: “Break new ground” and “Break out in a cold sweat” and “Break ranks” and “Break your heart” and “Make a clean break“. You can also replace “brake” with “break” to make a nice coffee pun that’s a little more obvious: “break fluid
  • Temper → Tamper: A “tamper” is used to compress ground coffee into a portafilter: “He’ll lose his tamper.” and “He has a tamper-tantrum if he doesn’t get his morning coffee.”
  • Tamper: As in “Someone tampered with the brakes on my car.”
  • Shot: This term is often used to in coffee lingo to explain the different sizes and strengths of a particular style of coffee (single shot, long shot, double shot, etc.). Thus, we can use this to make a few sneaky puns: “It’s a long shot, but I think we can do it.” and “That was a cheap shot.” and “Why don’t you have a shot at it?” and “I gave it my best shot.” and “Not by a long shot.” and “The money shot” and “You’ll get shot.” and “Shot in the dark”
  • Sentimental → Sedimental: As in “This antique coffee pot has a lot of sedimental value.”
  • The matter → Sumata: As in “What’s Sumatra with you?” (Sumatra is an Indonesian island that is well-known for growing coffee)
  • Depressed → Despressod: As in “I’m feeling a little despressod.”
  • Brazilian: Brazilian coffee is famous world-wide, and so the term “Brazilian” could be used as a coffee pun in the right context (so long as the usage is not referring to Brazilian coffee, obviously!)
  • Turkish: Same explanation as above.
  • Muddy: This is a term used to describe coffee that has lots of sediment/particles. Example usage: “The egg industry muddies the waters by funding rigged studies on cholesterol.”
  • Froth: As in “All froth and no substance.”
  • Show → Joe: A cup of coffee is sometimes called a “cup of Joe” and so “Joe” can be used as a synonym for “coffee”. Some pun ideas: “The greatest Joe on Earth” and “One-man Joe” and “Joe a little leg.” and “Joe some appreciation.” and “Steal the Joe.” and “The Joe must go on.” and “Joe me the ropes.”
  • Above her age → A beverage: As in “Her reading skills are a beverage” and “She pitches a beverage – that’s why she got into the national team.” and “She’s a beverage group in all her subjects.”
  • Shock → Choc: As in “I was in choc for a while after hearing about it.” and “Choc and awe” and “Choc horror” and “Culture choc.”
  • Coughing → Coffeeing: As in “There was so much coffeeing in the office – everyone had the flu.”
  • Mock her → Mocha: As in “Don’t mocha like that – she deserves respect and consideration.”
  • Stimulate: As in “This was a stimulating discussion, but I need to go now.” and “The courses aim to stimulate a passion for learning.”
  • Under → Umber: “Umber” is a brown, earthy colour that is often used to describe coffee and coffee grounds. Examples: “Get umber your skin” and “Keep it umber wraps” and “Hot umber the collar” and “Six feet umber” and “Umber cover of darkness” and “Umber pressure” and “Umber the influence” and “Umber the microscope” and “Umber your breath” and “Water umber the bridge”
  • Roast: This can refer to when someone is being criticised severely, but is also an obvious reference to roasted coffee beans. Example: “If you waste her time she’ll roast you.”
  • Drip: Refers to a “weak, ineffectual” person (aka: pushover, weakling, doorstop). It’s related to coffee because “drip brewing” is a popular method of preparing coffee. Example: “He doesn’t enjoy coffee puns – he’s such a drip!”
  • Cold press: If you can incorporate the words “cold” and “press” into a sentence in close proximity, you can probably make a cold press coffee pun: As in “No need to be cold. Pressing on, …” and “Stay away from me! If I catch your cold I’m pressing charges.”
  • Milky: This means “weak and compliant”. Example: “They just talk that way to make you turn milky.”
  • Milk: This can mean “exploit” or “fleece” or “get all possible advantage from a situation”. For example: “The newspapers were milking the story for every possible drop of drama.” and “They milked me dry.” and “Milk it for all it’s worth.”
  • Sugar: This can be used as a replacement for “shit” as in “Oh sugar!” It is also used as a term of endearment, as in “How are you feeling, sugar?”
  • Fair tradeThis term refers to a social movement which seeks to help producers in developing countries and promote sustainable farming. It’s often used to refer to “fair trade coffee”. We can use it as a coffee pun fairly easily: “I’ll stop making coffee puns, and you give me ten dollars. Is that a fair trade?”
  • *sip*: If a word contains the “sip” sound, it’s an opportunity for a terrible pun on “sip” as in “to sip your coffee” (so long as you emphasise the “sip” part somehow): Mississipi, disiplinarian, munisipality, presipitate, partisiples, presipitated, prinsipally, resipient, resiprocity.
  • *sep*: If a word contains the “sep” sound it’s a chance to make a terribly corny “sip” pun (perhaps emphasise with hyphens or underline/bold): ac-sip-tability (acceptability), bisips (biceps), consiption (conception), consipt (concept), desiptive, impersiptable, desiptive, misconsiption, persiptive, resiption, resiptionist, resiptivity, resiptors, siparatists (seperatists), siparation, siparate, susiptability, intersipt.
  • Happy → Frappe: As in “Don’t worry, be frappe.” and “Frappe birthday to you!” and “Frappe go lucky” and “Go to your frappe place” and “Not a frappe camper!” and “We’re just one big frappe family.”
  • Or lay → Au lait: This means “with milk” in French so “cafe au lait” means “coffee with milk”. It is pronounced like “aw lay”. Example pun: “We gonna get up and do something au lait here for a bit longer?”
  • Or lie → Au lait: (See explanation above) As in “Don’t cheat au lait – it’s immoral.”
  • Cup: This has a few different meanings outside of the normal one. The term “cup” is used in the measurement of bra sizes, and can be used as a verb for “form into the shape of a cup” (especially when referring to hands). These other definitions might be opportunities for subtle cup puns / coffee puns.
  • Robust → Robusta: Robusta is a variety of coffee (the other main one being Arabica). The adjective “robust” means “strong and/or healthy” or “rich and flavoursome”. Example: “He is a very robusta young fellow.”
  • They can’t → Decant: As in “They’re banned. Decant come back here.” and “Decant stop me. I can do anything.”
  • Percolate: This is a term  which describes a part of the coffee brewing process, but it’s actually a more general word that means “filter gradually through a porous surface or substance”. Thus we can use it as a synonym for “spread” or “be disseminated” or “filter”.
  • Earn → Urn: As in “I don’t urn much at the moment, but I’m working my way up.” and “You’ve urned it.” and “Urn an honest penny.” (These are a reference to hot-water “urns” which are often used to boil water for coffees in “break rooms”/kitchens at work places)
  • Felt her → Filter: As in “I filter breathing down the back of my neck.” and “I filter gaze fall on me.”
  • Filled her → Filter: As in “She has filter coffee pun quota for today.”
  • Barely → Barley: Barley coffee (or “caffè d’orzo”) is a widely available coffee alternative in Italy which is caffeine-free. If you’re particularly deep down the coffee pun rabbit hole, then this may be a viable pun – as in, “I barley talked to him!”
  • Plunge → Plunger: As in “Take the plunger!” and “She jumped from the jetty and plungered into the sea.” (A reference to “coffee plungers“)
  • I forgot → Afforgato: As in “Afforgato where I parked my car.” and ” I had another coffee pun but affogato it.” (Affogato is an Italian coffee-based dessert)
  • Grandma → Crema: As in “Crema just doesn’t stop talking.” and “My crema makes the most amazing hot chocolate.” (Crema is the name for the brownish foam on the top of freshly made espresso.)
  • Grammar → Crema: As in “Your crema is terrible.” and “Crema Nazis just like to feel good about themselves.”
  • Puck: This refers to compacted, spent coffee grounds from a portafilter. A few different puns can be made from this: “Oh puck!” and “The child’s face puckered, ready to cry.” and “Don’t press your puck.” and “Puck of the draw.” and “Beginner’s puck.” and “A bigger bang for your puck.” and “Puck naked.” and “Make a quick puck.”
  • Pull: Espresso shots are “pulled” – a holdover from when machines were lever operated. This may be a subtle one depending on the audience. Examples: “She doesn’t pull any punches.” and “Are you pulling my leg?” and “Pull the plug.” and “Pull your hair out” and “Pull yourself together!” and “Pull your finger out”
  • Nutty: A commonly used adjective in coffee lingo to describe a pleasant flavour of walnut, almond, hazelnut or other nuts. Examples: “Your coffee puns are a little nutty.” and “He came up with quite a few nutty proposals.”
  • Saucy / Saucier → Saucer: This is a corny one. “Saucy” has different meanings in different places. Sometimes it has a sexual connotation, other times it means “cheeky”. You’ll have to construct your pun with the audience in mind.
  • Settle → Kettle: As in “Kettle down everyone.” and “We should kettle this out of court.” and “I’ve got a score to kettle.”

Coffee-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to coffee can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the coffee themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • back office bean counter
  • not worth a hill of beans
  • don’t cry over spilt milk
  • came to a bitter end
  • take the bitter with sweet
  • a bitter pill to swallow
  • get in on the ground floor
  • both feet on the ground
  • hit the ground running
  • in hot water
  • that and a quarter will get you a cup of coffee
  • spill the beans
  • cool beans
  • not my cup of tea
  • tea and sympathy
  • brake fluid
  • you got creamed
  • different kettle of fish
  • the pot calling the kettle black
  • a watched pot never boils
  • between the cup and the lip
  • a storm is brewing
  • storm in a teacup
  • trouble is brewing
  • Have another? Please share it in the comments at the bottom of the page!

Coffee-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of coffee-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

espresso, flat white, bean, beans, caffeine, drink, cappuccino, cappa, java, java bean, arabica, iced, beverage, chocolate, coffee tree, mocha, stimulant, stimulated, cocoa, decaffeinated, coffee maker, barista, brew, Starbucks, Dome, cafe, latte, liberica, umber, brown,  decaf, demitasse, roast, roasting, drip, cold press, milk, milky, sugar, fair-trade, organic, sip, sipping, frappe, instant coffee, cafe au lait, coffee pot, hot, cup, cupful, teaspoon, black coffee, white coffee, café, nescafe, addictive, macciato, latte macciato, kahlua, decanter, percolate, percolator, robusta, ground, grind, chicory, urn, cafe noir, coffee break, cafetière, French press, filter, saucer, barley coffee, plunger, Turkish, lukewarm, tepid, muddy, Bazillian, rich, aroma, aromatic, bitter, Earthy, full-bodied, Americano, affogato, Chemex, dripper, cold drip, cortado, crema, dark roast, green beans, latte art, nel drop, flannel drip, portafilter, puck, pull, redeye, ristretto, slow dripper, aftertaste, malty, nutty, chai, degas, siphon brewer, mazagran, mélange, mochaccino, kettle, napoletana, ristretto, schlagobers, skilly, zurf, Biggin, tea, weak, strong, perk, mug, Sanka, Sumatra, cream, pumpkin spice latte, tamper, blend. blended, lungo, sediment, froth, stain.

Coffee Jokes

If you’re looking for some very corny coffee jokes, you’ve come to the right place. All of these one-liner-style coffee jokes use puns in their punchline. Some are phonetic puns, others are based on a slang phrase or cliche related to coffee.

  • How did the hipster burn her tongue? – She drank her coffee before it was cool.
  • What do you call a cow who’s just given birth? – De-calf-inated
  • What’s it called when you steal someone’s coffee? – A mugging!
  • Why do they call coffee “mud”? – Because it was ground a couple of minutes ago.
  • Why is a bad cup of coffee the end of a marriage?  – Because it’s grounds for divorce.
  • How are coffee beans like kids? – They are always getting grounded.
  • How is divorce like an Espresso? – It’s expensive and bitter.
  • What do you call sad coffee? – A despresso.
  • What’s the opposite of coffee? – A sneezy!

Coffee Pun Images

Below is a collection of coffee-related visual puns and meme-type images. If you’ve created your own visual coffee puns or found one that we’ve missed, please post us a link in the comments section 🙂

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you find the coffee-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments, below! Are you looking for puns for text messages, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or some other social media platform? Would you like to see more funny coffee pun images? Or perhaps you just want more coffee puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’re got any coffee puns (image or text) that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂