Corn Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on corn puns! 🌽 🍿 Whether you need a caption for your corn maze photo, some corn sayings based on puns, or you’re trying to devise a silly corn pick-up line, we hope this entry serves you well.

Most of the easy corn puns are based around the word “corn” itself, but towards the end of the list there’s a bunch of other puns based around corn-related words.

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entry on vegetable puns.

Corn Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about corn that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Corn → Can: As in “Corn’t we all just get along?” and “Appearances corn be deceptive.” and “Bit off more than you corn chew.” and “Corn you believe it?” and “You corn count on me.”
  • Corny: As in “Very corny puns”
  • Gone → Corn: As in “Here today, corn tomorrow.” and “It’s all corn pear-shaped.” and “Corn, but not forgotten.”
  • Kind → Corned: As in “Kill them with cornedness.” and “Cornedest regards, …” and “One of a corned” and “I paid him back in corned.” and “You have to be cruel to be corned.”
  • Scorn: As in “He became the object of scorn amongst his contemporaries.” and “They recieved scornful remarks for their lack of respect.”
  • Corner: As in “Out of the corner of my eye” and “They had me cornered” and “Go and sit in the naughty corner” and “I’ll be there soon, I’m just around the corner.” and “They come from all corners of the Earth.” and “We’ve cornered the market”.
  • Unicorn: As in “The last unicorn“.
  • Capricorn: As in “Astrology is silly, but my star sign is capricorn.”
  • Cornerstone: As in “Animal rights were the cornerstones of the new policy.”
  • Cornea: As in “My cornea is permanently damaged.”
  • Con* → Corn*: Very corny corn puns can be made with some words that start with the “con” sound (or similar): corntract, corncern, corntain, cornference, corntext, corncerned, corntrast, cornfidence, corndition, corntinue, cornsider, corntry, cornclusion, cornduct, cornversation, cornstruction, cornflict, corntribution, cornsent, cornsist, cornclude, cornservation, corntest, cornception, cornsequences, cornsult, corncert, cornventional, corncrete, corntinent, cornfine, cornsistantly, cornstitutional, cornvey, cornsiderably, cornsitituent, corntempt, corncede, cornfess, cornfrontation, corngregation, corntroversial, cornsensus, cornsultancy, cornquest, cornvicted, corngratulate. See this list for more.
  • *can* → *corn*: If a word contains the “can” sound (or similar), then a terrible corn pun can sometimes be made: corncel (cancel), corncellation (cancellation), corndidate (candidate), corndlelight (candlelight), cornibalism (cannibalism), cornteen (canteen), Scorndinavian (Scandinavian), scorndalous (scandalous), uncorny (uncanny).
  • *con* / *cahn* → *corn*: If a word contains the “con” sound (or similar), then a terrible corn pun can sometimes be made: ecornomists, incornsequential, discorntinuity, lexicorn, miscornduct, recornaissance, subcornscious, subcornsciously, subcorntinent, subcorntractor, uncornstitutional, uncornsciously, Wiscornsinlacornic (laconic), Americorn, balcorny, beacorn (of hope), applicornts (applicants), corntrydecornstruction, discorncerting, discornected, discorntinue, fecorndity (fecundity), forsacorn (forsaken), francornstein, heartbrocorn, icornography, incornceivable, insignificorned (insignificant), intercornect, lubricornt, mecornism (mechanism), miscornceptions, precornceptions, noncornformist, recorncile, secornhand, republicorn, supercornducting, uncorntrollable, uncornventional.
  • *carn*→*corn*: As in “This species is cornivorous.” and “Some superstitious people believe in reincornation.” and “Our team got beaten badly – it was utter cornage.”
  • Com* → Corn*: Some terrible corn puns can be made by replacing “com” at the start of a word with “corn” as in “You’re in good cornpany” and “You’ve made a cornplete fool of yourself” and “I’m a proud cornputer geek” and “We’ve got some stiff cornpetition” and “Cornpare and corntrast.” and “Shall I cornpare thee to a summer’s day?” and “He’s got an inferiority cornplex.” and “I think it’s due to a cornbination of factors.” and “Cornbine all the ingredients in a bowl.” and “You will be given $20 as cornpensation for your time.” and “I don’t feel cornfortable in my skin.” and “She’s got a strong cornpetitive streak.” and “… It’s cornplicated.” and “Cornplete and utter incornpetence.” and “A cornplimentary after-dinner mint.” and “You have to go. It’s cornpulsory.” There are more words starting with “com” in this list.
  • Kernel: As in “There is a kernel of truth to what she is saying.” and “This is the kernel of the argument.” and “The Linux kernel is free and open source.”
  • Sweet: Sweet corn is well known enough that you might be able to make a corn pun by simply mentioning “sweet” as in “You’re so sweet!” and “Oh that’s soo sweet!” and “Revenge is sweet” and “Short and sweet” and “Lay some sweet lines on someone” and “Sweet dreams” and “Sweet Jesus!” and “You bet your sweet life!” and “That was a sweet trick, dude.” and “Sweet as, bro.” and “Whisper sweet nothings” and “Home sweet home” and “Rose by any other name would smell as sweet” and “Sweet smell/taste of success/victory” and “Sweetheart“.
  • Suite → Sweet: As in “She was renting a 2-bedroom sweet for the summer.”
  • Sweat → Sweet: As in “Blood, sweet and tears” and “Beads of sweet rolled down my forehead” and “Break out in a cold sweet” and “By the sweet of my brow” and “Don’t sweet it.” and “Don’t sweet the small stuff.” and “All hot and sweety“.
  • Ask → Husk: As in “Husk a silly question and you’ll get a silly answer.” and “Husk and you shall receive.” and “She husked me out on a date” and “Funny you should husk” and “If you husk me, …” and “Don’t husk me!” and “That’s a big husk” and “What’s the husking price?” and “Don’t husk.” and “You’re husking for trouble” and “Don’t hesitate to husk” and “No questions husked.”
  • Husky: As in “He had a deep, husky voice.” and “The huskies pulled the sled at full speed.”
  • *usk* / *ask* → *husk*: If a word contains the “usk” sound (or anything vaguely similar) a silly corn husk pun can sometimes be made. Note that the terribleness of these ones will probably depend on your accent: conf-husk-ate (confiscate), hor-husk-opes (horoscopes), m-husk-quito (mosquito), m-husk-ular (muscular), min-husk-ule (minuscule), cardiov-husk-ular, m-husk-ara, m-husk-querading, m-husk-ulinity, b-husk-etball.
  • Stalk: The stem of a corn plant is called a “stalk”, and the term “corn stalk” may be well-known enough that the work “stalk” (in a non-stem sense) may qualify as a corn pun in the right context.
  • Field: The term “corn field” may be well-known enough that the term “field” alone (in a non-farming sense) may qualify as a corn pun in the right context: “It came out of left field” and “They had a field day” and “It’s a level playing field” and “She fielded the journalists’ questions adeptly”.
  • Filled → Field: As in “I have field my pun quota for today.” and “She field me in on the details”.
  • Failed → Field: As in “I have field in my duties, but I will try harder next time.”
  • Maze → Maize: As in “It’s a complicated maize to navigate.”
  • Mace → Maize: Another term for “pepper spray” is “mace”. It can also refer to a medieval spiked club weapon.
  •  Amazing→ Amaizing: As in “Truely amaizing.” and “Amaizing Grace.” and “I’m amaized!” and “To my utter amaizement …”
  • *mise → *maize: As in, minimaize (minimise), surmaize (surmise), victimaize (victimise), compromaize (compromise), customaize (customise), maximaize (maximise).
  • Nearly → Mealie: In South Africa, the term “mealie” can refer to a maize plan, maize kernels or to a corn cob. Example: “I mealie fell out of my chair!”
  • Cab → Cob: As in “Wave down a taxi cob
  • Cub → Cob: As in “A cute bear cob
  • *cob*: If a word contains the “cob” sound (or something vaguely similar), you can sometimes make a terrible corn cob pun: appli-cob-ility, amicobly (amicably), impracticoble, irrevocoble, inexplicobly, impeccobly, despicoble, macobre, unmista-cob-ly, unthin-cob-le, remar-cob-le.
  • Pop: As in “Pop on a hat.” and “Pop the question” and “Take a pop at”
  • *pop*: If a word contains “pop”, you may be able to emphasise it to make a popcorn pun: population, popularity, popular, populace, populous, populated, populist, unpopular.
  • *perp* → *pop*: If a word contains the “perp” sound (or similar), we can create a terrible popcorn pun: popendicular, popetrated, popetuity, popetuate, popetually, poplexed, poplexity, poplexed.
  • Creamed: As a creamed corn pun you might just be able to use the word “creamed” as in “We got creamed in our final match.”
  • Flake: As a corn flakes pun you might be able to just mention the word “flake” or “flakes” as in “He flakes so often it’s not worth asking him to come.” and “He so unreliable – total flake.” and “She’s a bit flaky.”
  • Crop: As in “Cream of the crop” and “Some new problems cropped up last minute”
  • Crap → Crop: As in “What a load of crop!”” and “He’s full of crop” and “I’ll beat the crop out of you!” and “Cut the crop!” and “Piece of crop” and “Oh crop“.
  • Shucks: The term “shuck” can refer to the husk (outer covering) of corn/maize or to the act of removing it. Example pun: “Aww shucks“.
  • Suck → Shuck: As in “This shucks.” and “Shuck it up.” and “He shucks up to her” and “Hah! Shuck it.”
  • Ear: As in “I’m all ears” and “It’s music to my ears” and “He’s wet behind the ears” and “I’m up to my ears in …” and “I’ve got money coming out of my ears” and “I can’t believe my ears” and “I’ve got my ear to the ground” and “But it fell on deaf ears” and “I think I’ll play it by ear” and “She pricked up her ears when …” and “He can talk your ear off” and “Blow it out your ear” and “Grinning from ear to ear“.
  • Here → Ear: As in “Ear and there” and “Do you come ear often?” and “Ear goes nothing!” and “Ear comes trouble” and “Ear’s the thing …” and “I’m outta ear” and “Neither ear nor there” and “Right ear, right now” and “Same ear.” and “See ear, …” and “You heard it ear first.”
  • Eerie → Earie: As in “Don’t you think this music sounds a bit earie?”
  • Air → Ear: As in “A breath of fresh ear” and “Vanished into thin ear.” and “It’s still up in the ear” and “Out of thin ear” and “He’s a bit of an ear head.” and “Full of hot ear“.

Corn-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of corn-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

corn, corny, cornfield, cornstalk, maize, cornmeal, cornstarch, cornhusking, husk, ear, mealie, hominy, corncob, cob, kernel, pone, popcorn, pop, sweet corn, shuck, johnnycake, nubbin, samp, grain, dent corn, flint corn, crop, harvest, yellow, tassel, baby corn, corn flakes, cereal, seed, corn syrup, crop circle, corn chips, creamed corn, polenta

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you find the corn-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments, below! Are you looking for puns for text messages, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or some other social media platform? Would you like to see more funny corn pun images? Or perhaps you just want more corn puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’re got any corn puns (image or text) that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂

Apple Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on apple puns! 🍎 🍏 Whether you’re looking for apple puns for captions, silly pickup lines or team/business names, we hope you find what you’re looking for.

Note that this entry is mainly focused on apple, the fruit, rather than Apple, the company. So while you wont find any Steve Jobs puns here, the puns in this entry that are specifically on the word “apple” itself could also be used in the context of Apple, the computer company.

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on fruit puns, banana puns, orange puns and watermelon puns.

Apple Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about apples that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Apple: As in “You’re comparing apples to oranges though.” and “You’re the apple of my eye.” and “He’s a bad apple.” and “She’s a rotten apple, that one.” and “The apple never falls far from the tree.” and “Apple of discord” and “As American as an apple pie.” and “How bout them apples?” or “How do you like them apples!” and “One bad apple spoils the barrel.” and “She’s one smart apple.” and “The Big Apple.” and “To polish the apple” and “You’ve really upset the apple cart now” and “Adam’s apple” and “An apple a day keeps the doctor away.”
  • Apply → Apple-eye / Apple-y: As in “Are you going to apple-eye for the job?” and “I’ve apple-eyed for several jobs.” and “Apple-y within” and “You need to apple-eye yourself if you want to get anywhere in life.” and “You need to apple-y for your driver’s license.”
  • Applic* → Apple-ic*: As in “The appleication form is easy to complete.” and “All apple-icants will be considered.” and “I don’t think that’s apple-icable in this situation.” and “You’ll need to make an apple-ication to the committee” and “Appleication of cool water should do the trick.”
  • Feel → Peel: As in “You can peel it in your bones.” and “I like the look and peel of the product.” and “I’m trying to get the peel for it.” and “These banana puns are making me peel unwell.” and “I peel a bit put out.” and “I’m peeling my age.” and “Peel the burn”
  • Peel: This word is sometimes used in ways which don’t refer to removing an outer covering: “The aeroplane peeled off from the rest of the formation and did a trick.” In general “peel off/out” means to move away quickly (especially with screeching tires, if it refers to a car).
  • Appeal → Appeel / A peel: “He’s so appeeling!” and “The court allowed one final a peel.” and “You need to a peel to their sense of honour.” and “I’m trying to appeel to your better judgement” and “They have 48 hours to appeel the decision.”
  • Appeal → Apple: As in “The prospect is apple-ing.” and “Apple to their blind patriotism.”
  • Pillar → Peeler: As in “You are a peeler of strength in our community.”
  • Skin: As in “Lucky I’ve got thick skin.” and “He’s all skin and bones.” and “Beauty is only skin-deep” and “By the skin of my teeth” and “I feel comfortable in my own skin.” and “She’s got skin in the game.” and “It’s no skin off my nose.” and “I almost jumped out of my skin!” and “It makes my skin crawl.”
  • Skim → Skin: As in “I was just skin-reading the comments here.”
  • Core: As in “That kid is rotten to the core.” and “That band is hardcore.” and “I prefer soft-core stuff.” and “What is the Earth’s inner core made of?” and “This exercise strengthens your core.” and “Our company is guided by 3 core principles.” and “The school should have the interests of its children at its core.” and “The core members always attend the meetings.” and “Core inflation is up 1.7 percent since last year” and “I’m mostly into emocore and mathcore music.” and “Core blimey!”
  • Caught → Cored: As in “Cored in the act” and “I was cored in the middle” and “I cored a cold from him” and “Like a deer cored in the headlights” and “Something cored my eye as we were crossing the street.” and “Cored between the devil and the deep blue sea” and “Cored unawares” and “Caught with my pants down” and “Cored in crossfire” and “You cored me off my guard.”
  • Chord → Cored: As in “It struck a cored with me.”
  • Court→ Cored: As in “I’ll see you in cored.” and “Order in the cored!” and “The ball is in your cored now.”
  • Course→ Cores: As in “I’m doing a university cores in computational neuroscience.”
  • *cor* → *-core-*: If a word contains the “cor” sound (or similar) then we can make a terrible apple core pun: “A core-tionary tale.” and “That’s be-cores I’m cool.” and “Accoredingly, we will move the meeting to Thursday.” and “Proceed with core-tion” and “She died from unknown coreses” and “He coresed an uproar with his latest staff cuts.” and “I love the core-us of that song.” and “We core-dially invite you to join us in celebrating …” and “My new core-dless drill is so handy.” and “The police will core-don off the area soon.” and “A core-porate job” and “These core-perations are the heart of our economy.” and “We go to our live core-espondent in the field.” and “It core-esponds to a shrinking middle class.” and “The core-pses of the poor animals were buried in the field.” and “We were es-core-ted to the main chamber.” and “There has been some discored amongst our members.” and “We’ve sent it over to our head-core-ters.” and “The temperature reached a re-cored high today.” and “The score was 22 to 7 after the first quarter.”
  • Name / Title → Apple-ation: The word “appellation” means “name” or “title”.
  • Aptly → Applely: As in “Religion has been applely called ‘the opium of the people.'”
  • App will → App’ll / Apple: As in “This app’ll help you track your time and make you more productive – you should download it.”
  • *ap will → *ap’ll / *apple: As in “This chap’ll help you find your way home.” and “A loud enough clap’ll wake me up.” and “This strapple help secure the load during the trip.” and “Any more of this crapple make us go mad!” and “Another mishap’ll doom this company.” and “This trapple be sure to catch one.” and “A single tap’ll make the bell ring loudly.” and “The gap’ll be hard to jump but we have no choice.” and “Each lap’ll use up a litre of fuel.” and “This map’ll help guide us to the treasure.” and “The handicap’ll make up for it.” and “Each flap’ll lift us higher and higher.” and “That rap’ll make it to the charts in no time.” and “A nap’ll refresh you and give you more energy.” and “A light slapple wake me up.”
  • A pl* → Apple-*: As in “There’s apple-ace I know not far from here.” and “That’s apple-us (a plus)” and “It’s apple-easure that I feel somewhat guilty about.” and “We’re going to see apple-ay at the theatre tonight.” and “It was nothing special. Just apple-ain old brick house.” and “She was apple-ainly spoken, intelligent person.” and “After eating we went for apple-easant stroll through the park.” and “We had apple-an, but we weren’t sure how to carry it out.” and “It was apple-easing sight.” and “It was apple-ant our botanist had never seen before.” and “Can you get apple-ate for our new guest?” and “Apple-anned extension to the highway will be finished by summer.” and “It was apple-easing evening.” and “Apple-easantly designed garden.” and “Apple-ayer from the other team was injured.” and “Apple-anet in a nearby solar system” and “We saw apple-ume of smoke on the horizon.” and “Do you have apple-astic cup for little Olivia?” – You can create many more puns like this by using this list of words starting with “pl”.
  • Eye → Pie: As in “Beauty is in the pie of the beholder.” and “A bird’s pie view’ and “We’re in the pie of the storm” and “Pies pie with my little pie” and “In the blink of a pie” and “Keep a pie out for …” and “We see pie to pie.” and “I’ve got a pie on you.” and “Something caught my pie” and “Pie-popping”
  • I → Pie: As in “Pie think you’re right.” and “Pie’m not so sure about that.”
  • Granny: Since Granny Smith apples are so widely known, you might be able to make an apple pun by simply using the word “granny” in your writing/speech.
  • Or should I → Orchard I: As in “I should stop making apple puns now… orchard I?”
  • Saw → Seed: As in “It took me a while, but I eventually seed her point of view.”
  • Seed: As in “It planted a seed of hope in their minds.” and “We got more seed capital from investors.”
  • Pink lady: This refers to a particular variety of apple. If you can somehow work the words “pink” and “lady” into your prose/speech in close proximity then you’ve got a sneaky apple pun: “I prefer pink, but that lady thinks yellow would suit it better.”
  • Downside is → Down ciders: As in “One down ciders that we’ll need to redo a lot of work.”
  • Alongside her → Along cider: As in “Her dog was running happily along cider.”
  • Beside her → Be cider: As in “Her dog stood happily be cider.”
  • Inside her → In cider: As in “She always keeps an apple in cider backpack.”
  • Insider → In cider: As in “We got some in cider information from an anonymous executive.”
  • Decided → Decidered / De-cider-d: As in “I’ve decidered to start an apple farm.”
  • Fruitful: As in “This has been a very productive and fruitful discussion.”
  • Just → Juiced: As in “I’m juiced around the corner.” and “Juiced in time.” and “Juiced the ticket.” and “Juiced this once.”
  • Fruity: Other than referring to actual fruit, this term also has several slang definitions including being flamboyant or “bouncy”. It may also refer to someone who is considered crazy in some respect.
  • Sweet: As in “You’re so sweet!” and “Oh that’s soo sweet!” and “Revenge is sweet” and “Short and sweet” and “Lay some sweet lines on someone” and “Sweet dreams” and “Sweet Jesus!” and “You bet your sweet life!” and “That was a sweet trick, dude.” and “Sweet as, bro.” and “Whisper sweet nothings” and “Home sweet home” and “Rose by any other name would smell as sweet” and “Sweet smell/taste of success/victory” and “Sweetheart
  • Got another apple pun? Please post it in the comments below! 🙂

Apple-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of apple-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

apple, apples, fruit, orchard, peel, skin, peeler, cider, apple cider, granny smith, apple sauce, apple pie, fruit tree, crabapple, apple juice, crunchy, sweet, apple core, core, seed, apple seed, pippin, pip, pome, rotten apple, costard, sweeting, redstreak, pare, paring, biffin, alligator apple, golden delicious, fuji, red delicious, mcintosh, gala, braeburn, pink lady, honeycrisp, empire, sampion, ambrosia, pomaceous, malus, toffee apple, candy apple, apple strudel, apple cider vinegar, russet

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you find the apple-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments, below! Are you looking for puns for text messages, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or some other social media platform? Would you like to see more funny apple pun images? Or perhaps you just want more apple puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’re got any apple puns (image or text) that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂

Vegetable Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on vegetable puns, salad puns and related topics! 🍅🍆🌽🍄 Whether you’re looking for a name for your veggie patch, in a veg pun battle with your friend, trying to come up with some cute vegetable pickup lines, or just want to stock up on some vegetable word play for future use, I hope this entry serves you well.

As well as covering leafy vegetables (lettuce, cabbage, kale), roots, legumes and other vegetable-like foods are covered too, so you’ll see some potato puns, corn puns, onion puns, pumpkin puns, and all sorts of others based around those general topics.

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on food puns, fruit puns, cooking puns, corn puns and potato puns.

Vegetable Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of veggie puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about vegetables that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Call → Kale: As in “Above and beyond the kale of duty.” and “His authenticity was kaled into question.” and “Kale it quits.” and “Kale the shots.” and “Kale of the wild.” and “Kale to action.” and “A judgement kale.” and “That was a close kale.” and “Wake-up kale“.
  • Gale → Kale: As in “It’s blowing a kale out here!” and “I slept well despite the howling kales outside.”
  • Keel → Kale: As in “Keep an even kale.” and “A yacht’s kale keeps it upright.”
  • Solid → Salad: As in “Salad gold.” and “As salad as rock.” and “Rock salad.” and “Make sure you’ve built a salad foundation.”
  • Sullied → Salad: To be “sullied” is to be defiled, tainted, stained or spoiled. Example: “The politician’s good name was salad by the media after the allegations were confirmed.” This one’s is a bit of a stretch!
  • Salah → Salad: The term “salah” describes the act of worship (5 times a day) in the Islamic religion. Example: “Salad is recommended 5 times a day.”
  • Salary → Celery: As in “I didn’t take the job. The celery was too low.”
  • Leak → Leek: As in “The information was leeked and a huge media storm erupted.” and “I’m just going to take a leek.” and “Be careful with that shopping bag! There’s a leek in it.” and “The dam sprung a leek.”
  • Leg → Leek: As in “It cost me an arm and a leek.” and “Shake a leek!” and “Without a leek to stand on” and “Haha just pulling your leek :)”
  • Lick → Leek: As in “Leek your lips.” and “Stand up for yourself. Don’t leek his boots.” and “Leek your wounds.”
  • Parcel → Parsley: As in “Let’s play pass the parsley!”
  • Leg room → Legume: As in “I always pay a little extra for the aeroplane seats with more legume.”
  • Choke → Artichoke: This is a corny one: “I almost artichoked on my food when she told me.” and “She was artichoked by emotion as she gave her speech at the funeral.”
  • Bumpkin → Pumpkin: As in “I’m a bit of a country pumpkin, but I’m getting used to the city.”
  • Heard → Herb: As in “I herb it on the grape vine.” and “You herb it here first.” and “You could have herb a pin drop.”
  • Curb → Herb: As in “Herb your enthusiasm.” and “Drive up onto the herb.”
  • *erb* → *herb*: If a word contains the “herb” sound (or similar) a cringe-worthy herb pun can sometimes be made: advherb, distherbance, distherbingly, exacherbate, aftherburner, countherbalance, hypherbole, knickherbockers, mastherbate, nonvherbal, refherbishment, rivherbankherbanization, vherbalize.
  • Plant: This can also mean “place in a fixed or specified position”, and “a place where an industrial or manufacturing process takes place”. Examples: “She planted herself squarely in front of him” and “The new automobile manufacturing plant is the biggest in the country.”
  • Planned → Plant: As in “I had plant to get there by 8pm” and “Do you have anything plant?”
  • Bland → Plant: As in “The hospital food was flavourless and plant as usual.” and “He gave a weak, plant smile.” and “It tastes a little plant. More herbs?”
  • Let us → Lettuce: As in “Lettuce eat!” and “Lettuce celebrate!”
  • Led us → Lettuce: As in “You’ve lettuce down the wrong path!” and “But it lettuce to the wrong conclusion.”
  • It’s/Its → Oat’s/Oats: As in “Oat’s about time!” and “Look at oats cute little face!”
  • Maze → Maize: As in “It’s a complicated maize to navigate.”
  • Mace → Maize: Another term for “pepper spray” is “mace”. It can also refer to a medieval spiked club weapon.
  •  Amazing→ Amaizing: As in “Truely amaizing.” and “Amaizing Grace.” and “I’m amaized!” and “To my utter amaizement …” (Maize is another name for corn)
  • *mise → *maize: As in, minimaize (minimise), surmaize (surmise), victimaize (victimise), compromaize (compromise), customaize (customise), maximaize (maximise).
  • Baggage → Cabbage: This one is lovely and corny: “I’m carrying around a lot of emotional cabbage.” or “Please place personal items in the overhead cabbage compartment.”
  • Until → Lentil: As in “It ain’t over lentil it’s over!” and “It’s all fun and games lentil someone gets hurt.”
  • Care at → Carrot: As in “I don’t carrot all.”
  • Not re-enter → Nutrient-er: As in “You should nutrient-er the discussion after that terrible contribution.”
  • Beat → Beet: As in “Let’s not beet around the bush.” and “If you leave now, you’ll beet the rush.” and “Can you hear my heartbeet?” and “You deserve a beeting for that.” and “Damn, these are some fine beets you’re playing!” and “There’s always deadbeets hanging around that park at night.” and “He’s not crazy – just a little offbeet.” and “We pride ourselves in our unbeetable service.” and “I’m feeling fairly upbeet today :)” and “Diabeetes is a pun, but it’s insensitive.”
  • Between → Beetween: As in “Beetween you and me …” and “With your tail beetween your legs.” and “Read beetween the lines.” and “Beetween a rock and a hard place.”
  • Bead → Beet: As in “Tiny round beets are dangerous for children.”
  • Repeat → Rebeet: As in “I’m not going to rebeet myself.” and “Those who do not learn from history are doomed to rebeet it.” and “I warned him rebeetedly.”
  • Pizza → Beet-za: As in “I always buy my beetzas from the same beetzaria.”
  • *pit* → *beet*: If a word contains the “pit” sound, a terrible beet pun can sometimes be made: cabeetal city, hosbeetalisation, palbeetations, abeetizing, precibeetation, serendibeetous, inhosbeetable.
  • Pete → Beet: As in “His name is beet.”
  • Peed → Beet: This one is a stretch: “I laughed so hard I nearly beet my pants.”
  • Corny: As in “Very corny vegetable puns”
  • Con* → Corn*: Very corny corn puns can be made with some words that start with the “con” sound (or similar): corntract, corncern, corntain, cornference, corntext, corncerned, corntrast, cornfidence, corndition, corntinue, cornsider, corntry, cornclusion, cornduct, cornversation, cornstruction, cornflict, corntribution, cornsent, cornsist, cornclude, cornservation, corntest, cornception, cornsequences, corsult, corncert, cornventional, corncrete, corntinent, cornfine, cornsistantly, cornstitutional, cornvey, cornsiderably, cornsitituent, corntempt, corncede, cornfess, cornfrontation, corngregation, corntroversial, cornsensus, cornsultancy, cornquest, cornvicted, corngratulate. See this list for more.
  • Have a car though → Avocado: As in “I don’t ‘avocado.”
  • Her before → Herbivore: As in “I met herbivore at the gym.”
  • Turn up → Turnip: As in “Turnip the music!” and “It’ll turnip somewhere.”
  • Been → Bean: As in “We’ve all bean there.” and “You know, I’ve bean thinking…” and “Bean there, done that.” and “He’s a has-bean.” and “The die has bean cast.” and “I’ve bean had.” and “She’s bean in the wars lately.”
  • Unbeknown(st) →Unbeanown(st): As in “Unbeanownst to me, she made some enquiries.”
  • *peen* →*bean*: If a word contains the “peen” sound we can make some silly bean puns: Phillibeano (Phillipino), beanalize (penalize), unhappbeaness (unhappiness), subbeana (subpoena). Note: a subpoena is a witness summon.
  • Enough →Beanough: As in “Beanough is beanough.” and “Beanough to make you sick.”
  • Enormous →Beanormous: As in “Your vegetable garden is beanormous!”
  • Beam → Bean: As in “Bean me up, Scotty!” and “Tractor bean.” and “Balancing bean.”
  • Bin → Bean: As in “It was in the bargain bean – 30% off!” and “Please put your rubbish in the bean.”
  • Pin → Bean: This one’s a bit of a stretch. Examples: “Bean the tail on the donkey.”
  • Deal → Dill: As in “What’s the big dill?” and “I’m kind of a big dill around here.” (“Dill” is a herb, and is often short for dill-pickle – a cucumber that has been preserved and given the flavour of the dill herb)
  • Pickle: “We’re in a bit of a pickle here.”
  • Much room → Mushroom: “It’s only a little elevator, there isn’t mushroom in here.”
  • Wheat: As in, “Separate the wheat from the chaff.” Note: to separate the wheat from the chaff is to separate the valuable from the worthless.
  • Wait → Wheat: As in “Wheat a second…” and “I am lying in wheat.”
  • White → Wheat: As in, “A wheater shade of pale,” and “A wheat knight,” and “Wheat as a ghost,” and “Wheat as a sheet,” and “Great wheat shark,” and “Like wheat on rice,” and “Little wheat lie,” and “Men in wheat coats,” and “Not everything is black and wheat,” and “Wheat water rafting.” Note: like white on rice refers to a very close situation.
  • Sweet → Swheat: As in, “Home swheat home,” and “Swheat dreams,” and “Swheat nothings,” and “A swheat tooth,” and “Swheaten the pot,” and “Swheaten the deal,” and “Swheatheart,” and “Take the bitter with the swheat,” and “Short but swheat.”
  • Sweat → Swheat: As in, “Blood, swheat and tears,” and “Beads of swheat,” and “Break out in a cold swheat,” and “Don’t swheat it,” and “Running with swheat,” and “My new swheater,” and “Swheating bullets,” and “Swheat it out.”
  • Weight → Wheat: As in, “Pull your wheat,” and “Punching above your wheat,” and “Throw your wheat around,” and “Watch your wheat,” and “A wheat off my mind,” and “Worth your wheat in gold,” and “A dead wheat.”
  • *ate* → *wheat*: As in, evacu-wheat (evacuate), fluctu-wheat (fluctuate), and gradu-wheat (graduate).
  • What → Wheat: As in “Wheatever, man.” and “Wheat are you up to today?”
  • We t* → Wheat: As in “Wheat talked about this last night.” and “Wheat took our time.”
  • We’d → Wheat: As in “Wheat love for you to join us!”
  • Please → Peas: As in “Do as you peas.” and “Pretty peas?”
  • Pee → Pea: As in “Brb, really need to pea.”
  • Peace → Peas: As in “World peas.” and “Inner peas” and “Peas of mind” and “Rest in peas.” and “War and Peas” and “Keep the peas” and “Peas be with you”
  • Piece → Peas: As in “Peas by peas” and “Peas of mind” and “Peas of cake” and “Real peas of work” and “Peas of pie” and “Real peas of work” and “Speak your peas” and “How long is a peas of string?”
  • *peas*: There are a few words with the “peas” sound in them: centerpeas (centerpiece), earpeas (earpiece), Greenpeas (Greenpeace), masterpeas (masterpiece), mouthpeas (mouthpiece), peasfully, peaskeepers, peastime, Peasa (Pisa), timepeas (timepiece).
  • *pea*: If a word contains the “pea” sound, you can make a terrible pea pun by adjusting the spelling and emphasising the “pea” part: appealing, appease, bumpea (bumpy), centipeade, champeaon, champeaonship, compeate, copearight (copyright), creepea (creepy), dopea (dopey), encyclopeadia, entropea, escapea, espeaonage, Ethiopean, Europeaan, expeadient, frumpea, grumpea, hippea, happea, happeaest, homosapean, impead, loudspeaker, peacock, peafowl, peak, peadiatric, peanalize, philipeano, peano (piano), peaqued, recipeas, recipeantsm repeal, repeat, scorpeaon, speacies, peaple (people), speach, speaker, speachless, therapea.
  • Snap a piece → Snap a peas: This plays on “snap peas” – a very common type of pea: “Can you snap a peas off for me peas (please)?”
  • Remain → Romaine: “Romaine” is a type of lettuce. Examples: “Everyone romaine calm.” and “It romaines to be seen.”
  • To my toes → Tomatoes: As in “I got a shiver from my head tomatoes.”
  • Tomorrow → Tomato: As in “Here today, gone tomato.”
  • Tube of → Tuber: As in “Can I please purchase a tuber hand cream?”
  • All up in your → Jalapeño: As in “Jalapeño business.” and “Jalapeño grill.”
  • Serial → Cereal: As in “There’s a cereal killer on the loose.”
  • Surreal → Cereal: As in “The view from the summit was cereal.” and “I love impressionism and cereal art.”
  • Grain: As in “I’m going to go against the grain here and say …” and “There’s a grain of truth in what he’s saying.” and “I’d take it with a grain of salt.”
  • Grainy: Other than referring to grain (the crop food, of course), this can refer to a texture or to a low resolution photograph: “Your profile picture is a bit grainy.”
  • Ingrained: As in “It was ingrained in me from a young age.”
  • Again → A grain: As in “Come a grain?” and “Never a grain.” and “Time and time a grain.” and “Now and a grain.”
  • Rain → Grain: As in, “Right as grain,” and “Chasing grainbows,” and “Come grain or shine,” and “Grain on my parade,” and “Make it grain,” and “Graindrops keep falling on my head,” and “Graining cats and dogs,” and “Singin’ in the grain,” and “Somewhere over the grainbow,” and “Spitting with grain.” Notes: to chase rainbows is to go after unrealistic things. To rain on someone’s parade is to ruin a happy moment for them.
  • Grey → Grain: As in, “Fifty shades of grain,” and “A grain area,” and “Grain is the new black,” and “Grain matter,” and “Shades of grain.” Note: shades of grey refers to the complexity of a situation.
  • Brain → Grain: As in, “All brawn and no grains,” and “Beat your grains out,” and “Grain dead,” and “Grain fart,” and “Grain teaser,” and “Grain wave,” and “Grainstorming session,” and “Got it on the grain,” and “Hare grained,” and “A no-grainer,” and “Pick your grains,” and “Rack your grains,” and “It’s not grain surgery.”
  • Grind → Grain-d: As in, “Bump and grain-d,” and “Daily grain-d,” and “Grain-d down,” and “Grain-d to a halt,” and “Nose to the grain-dstone,” and “Don’t like the bastards grain-d you down.” Note: to have your nose to the grindstone is to work hard.
  • Gain → Grain: As in, “Capital grains,” and “Grain an advantage,” and “Ill-gotten grains,” and “No pain, no grain,” and “Nothing ventured, nothing grained.” Note: a capital gain is a profit from the sale of a capital asset (like stock or real estate).
  • *gain* → *grain*: As in, “Agrainst all odds,” and “Agrainst the clock,” and “Bar-grain basement,” and “Come a-grain?” and “A fool’s bar-grain,” and “Here we go a-grain,” and “More than you bar-grained for,” and “Now and a-grain,” and “A race agrainst time,” and “You can say that a-grain,” and “Back agrainst the wall.”
  • *ray* → *grain*: Change the “ray” sound in some words to “grain”: grain-ciously (graciously), engrainve (engrave), grain-dation (gradation), grain-dient (gradient), immi-grain-tion (immigration), ingrain-dient (ingredient).
  • I love → Olive: As in “Olive you so much!” and “Olive silly food puns!”
  • Or live → Olive: As in “Live like a king olive on a shoe string.”.
  • All of → Olive: As in “Sending olive my love to your family.”
  • Time → Thyme: As in “All in good thyme.” and “Better luck next thyme.” and “We just need to buy some thyme.”
  • Platter → Plait her: “I love to platter hair – it’s therapeutic.”
  • Dip: As in “Take a dip” and “Dip your toe in.” (Playing on the “crackers and dip” form of “dip”)
  • I am → I yam: As in “I yam who I yam.”
  • Yankee → Yamkee: As in “The Newyork Yamkees are up 3 points!”
  • Mint: “All of the items are mint condition.”
  • Mean’t → Mint: As in “We were just mint to be.” and “You weren’t mint to eat it!”
  • *ment → *mint: Words that end in “ment” can be simple cheesy “mint” puns: governmint, developmint, momint, managemint, departmint, agreemint, environmint, investmint, employmint, equiptmint, commint, assessmint, requiremint, improvemint, appointmint, settlemint, experimint, establishmint, implemint, announcemint, punishmint, measuremint, dissapointmint, advertisemint, encouragemint, embarrassmint, segmint, argumint, pigmint, tormint, paymint, ornamint, sedamint, vehemint, shipmint, treatmint, statemint, merrimint. See this list for more.
  • Clothes → Cloves: As in “I’m only half-cloved” and “The emperor’s new cloves.”
  • Love → Clove: As in “I clove you so much!” and “Clove is in the air.”
  • Garret → Carrot: A “garret” is an attic, loft or roof space.
  • Root: As in “I’m rooting for you!” and “Money is the root of all evil.” (The term “root” is also a synonym for sexual intercourse in some countries/regions)
  • Rude → Root: As in “A root awakening.” and “He has no manners – very root.”
  • Green: This can obviously refer to the colour, but it can also refer to someone who is inexperienced or naive: “A green recruit fresh from college.”
  • Funnel → Fennel: “Fennel” is a herb. Example: “They were all fenneled into the same career by the specialist college.”
  • Final → Fennel: As in “It’s the fennel count down.” and “You have the fennel say.” and “It’s my fennel offer.”
  • Squash: As in “Don’t squash the poor bug!” and “We need to squash the competition.”
  • Roo bar → Rhubarb: In Australia a car’s “bullbar” is often called a “roo bar” (“roo” is short for “kangaroo”).
  • Saw → Seed: The past tense form of “see” is of course “saw”, but we can be make a silly seed pun if we “conjugate” “see” like we normally do with regular verbs: “seed”. Examples:  “I came, I seed, I conquered.”
  • Seedy: This is a describing word for someone or something that is morally questionable, foul, or dirty. Examples: “So many seedy people hanging around that place.”
  • Seed: As in “But it planted a seed of hope.” and “We got more seed capital from investors.”
  • Properly → Broccoli: This one’s a stretch! Example: “If you’re going to do it at all, you might as well do it broccoli.”
  • Leave → Leaf: As in “Absent without leaf.” and “Leaf no stone unturned” and “Leaf your options open.” and “Love them and leaf them.” and “That’s going to leaf a mark!” and “I’m leafing tomorrow morning.”
  • Love → Leaf: As in “I leaf you so much!” and “Leaf is in the air.”
  • Laugh → Leaf: As in “Leaf all the way to the bank.” and “Leaf in your face.” and “Leaf your head off.”
  • Leaves: As in “She leaves without a trace.”
  • So → Soy: This simple soy pun works best if the word after “so” begins with a “y”, but it still works without it. Examples: “Soy you think you can dance?” and “It’s soy sad.” and “There’s only soy much you can do.”
  • Say → Soy: As in “What did you just soy?” and “To have the final soy.” and “Needless to soy, …” and “Never soy never.”
  • Soil → Soyl: As in “That tofu pun was hilarious – I almost soyled my pants.” and “Fertile soyl.”
  • *soy*: Other words containing the “soy” sound can also be soy puns: ellipsoyd (ellipsoid), sinusoydally (sinusoidally).
  • So you been → Soya bean: As in “Soya bean up to much lately?”
  • Corn → Can: As in “Corn’t we all just get along?” and “Appearances corn be deceptive.” and “Bit off more than you corn chew.” and “Corn you believe it?” and “You corn count on me.”
  • Gone → Corn: As in “Here today, corn tomorrow.” and “It’s all corn pear-shaped.” and “Corn, but not forgotten.”
  • Pulse: This term can refer to a couple of different things. First, the pulse of your veins caused by your heart-beat, or more generally, any short burst or vibration (e.g. of sound, electricity, etc.). Second, it is a synonym of “legume” which refers to produce like chickpeas, lentils, and beans.
  • But any → Botany: As in “You expect me to be impressed, botany body can do that.”
  • Culture → Agriculture: A very corny one: “I was feeling homesick and experiencing agriculture shock.”
  • Too bad → Tuberd: As in “You want some? Tuberd, it’s all mine.” and “Tuberd the shoes don’t fit you.”
  • *uber*: Words that contain the “uber” sound (or similar) can sometimes be potato puns: extuberant (exuberant), tuberis (hubris), protuberances, tuberty (puberty).
  • Guarding → Garden: As in “A soldier was garden the entry.” and “The manager was always garden his reputation by blaming others.”
  • Esteemed → E-steamed: As in “Many of these qualities are e-steamed by managers.” and “Contemporary Japanese ceramics are highly e-steamed.”
  • Raw: As in “That was a raw deal.” (a bad deal)
  • Brussels: It’s the name of a region in Belgium, but is also well known as part of the phrase “Brussels sprout” which is a well known vegetable which likely originated there.
  • She weed→ Seaweed: As in “I just got a new pet rabbit and seaweed on my carpet.”
  • Produce: When the emphasis is on the “prod” part of this word, it refers to things that have been grown on a farm. You might be able to make vegetable puns with this in the right context.
  • Crop: As in “If you crop the photo it’ll look better.” and “The cream of the crop.” and “I always ask the hairdresser for a crop.”
  • Crop up: To “crop up” means to appear unexpectedly and/or suddenly, and thus could be a pun on “crop” which is a cultivated grain, fruit or vegetable.
  • Crap → Crop: As in, “A load of crop,” and “Bunch of crop,” and “Cut the crop,” and “The cropper,” and “Full of crop,” and “Do bears crop in the woods?” and “Don’t crop where you eat,” and “A piece of crop,” and “You scared the crop out of me.”
  • Scrap* → S-crop*: As in, “S-crop iron,” and “Bow and s-crope,” and “S-crope along,” and “S-crope the bottom of the barrel,” and “S-crope through,” and “S-crope together,” and “Table s-crops.”
  • Cop → Crop: As in, “Crop an attitude,” and “Crop out,” and “Crop shop,” and “It’s a fair crop,” and “Undercover crop,” and “Crop onto something,” and “A dirty crop.” Notes: to cop an attitude is to behave rudely. A fair cop is when you acknowledge that you’ve been caught doing wrong.
  • *cop* → *crop*: As in, “Under the microscrope,” and “Scrope out,” and “Cropycat,” and “Carbon cropy.”
  • *crop*: Emphasise the “crop” in certain words to make some corny Thanksgiving puns: acrophobia, microphone, acropolis and outcrop. Notes: Acrophobia is an extreme and irrational fear of heights. An acropolis is a citadel.
  • Cartoon → Cardoon: This is thistle of the sunflower family that is often called an “Artichoke thistle”. It has edible leaves and roots. Example: “Disney has some of the most famous cardoons in the world.”
  • Okay→ Okra: As in “Are you feeling okra?” (Terrible! 😀 By the way, okra is a plant the has edible green pods)
  • Rocket: As well as the obvious definition, “rocket” refers to a type of leafy salad vegetable.
  • Law → Slaw: As in “Slaw and order.” and “I am a slaw abiding citizen.” and “The slaw of diminishing returns.” and “The slaw of the jungle.” You could also use “slaw” to replace “it’s law” – perhaps add a preceding apostrophe like so: ‘slaw
  • A thousand islands: “Thousand Island” is a popular salad dressing. If you can somehow work “thousand island” into your prose, you’ve got yourself a salad pun.
  • Dressing: As in “Oh stop dressing it up!” and “Are you dressing up for Halloween?”
  • Sprout: This is a general term for “to emerge and grow rapidly”, but has obvious vegetable-based connotations (and probably origins). Example: “He thought he’d sprout wings and fly.”
  • Iceberg: A popular type of lettuce, and also (obviously) a big chunk of ice floating in the ocean.
  • Fresh: This is a term that is strongly associated with vegetables and so could probably qualify as a vegetable pun if used in the right context (though it’s a bit of a stretch!). Phrases like “a fresh start” and “a fresh pair of eyes” may be useful.
  • Bulb: As in “Can you change that light bulb for me?”
  • Stalk: “The spy stalked the target for days before getting enough intel.”
  • Pretty good → Rad-ish: When something is “rad” it’s awesome, cool or really good. If something is “rad-ish” then it’s just pretty good (and not overly so).

Vegetable-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to vegetables can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the vegetable themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • as easy as shelling peas
  • as red as beetroot
  • carrot and stick
  • cauliflower ear
  • cool beans
  • cool as a cucumber
  • couch potato
  • sofa spud
  • dangle the carrot
  • (to play) hot potato
  • fine words butter no parsnips
  • full of beans
  • I yam what I yam
  • sprout wings and fly
  • spill the beans
  • know your onions
  • not worth a hill of beans
  • cultivate your garden
  • it ain’t rocket science
  • in a pickle
  • keep your eyes peeled
  • like two peas in a pod
  • he has a green thumb
  • small potatoes
  • separate the wheat from the chaff
  • take a leaf out of my book
  • turn over a new leaf
  • the cream of the crop
  • whatever tickles your pickle
  • you can’t squeeze blood out of a turnip
  • plant a seed of doubt
  • plant the seed
  • seed money / seed capital / seed round
  • the grass is always greener on the other side

Vegetable-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of vegetable-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

tomato, lettuce, beet, plant, onion, herb, spinach, pumpkin, potato, veggie, vegan, vegetarian, artichoke, cardoon, veg, legume, okra, cucumber, celery, asparagus, eggplant, salad, yam, bamboo shoot, bean, casava, produce, garlic, leek, mushroom, cabbage, radish, carrot, root vegetable, root, greens, fennel, squash, rhubarb, plantain, seed, turnip, chicory, kale, broccoli, leafy, leaf, leafy vegetable, soy, corn, avocado, sweet potato, cauliflower, herbal, soya bean, pulse, watercress, pea, parsnip, botany, agriculture,  tuber, beans, zucchini, garden, maize, cuisine, steamed, organic, wheat, cereals, grains, vegetation, capsicum, raw, soybean, tofu, onions, brussel sprouts, seaweed, beetroot, thyme, lentil, pea pod, runner bean, caesar salad, coleslaw, salad bar, bell pepper, croutons, bean salad, shallot, pickle, peel, aubergine, courgette, salsify, vegetative, green bean, snap peas, broad bean, salad dressing, slaw, rocket, waldorf salad, ranch dressing, thousand island dressing, chicory, greek salad, lemon grass, spring onion, cherry tomato, celtuce, cos lettuce, sprouts, alfalfa sprouts, alfalfa, arugula, butterhead lettuce, head lettuce, iceberg lettuce, chard, parsley, cassava, pickled, green, healthy, vitamins, fibre, fresh, green pepper, acorn squash, basil, black-eyed peas, capers, celeriac, chick peas, chinese cabbage, collard greens, cress, daikon, dandelion greens, endive, fava bean, ginger, gourd, chilli peppers, jicama, kohlrabi, lima bean, mung bean, mustard greens, olive, pattypan squash, peppers, radiccho, rutabaga, scallion, sorrel, spuds, succotash, string bean, swiss chard, taro, tomatillo, vegetable, wasabi, water chestnut, herbaceous, irrigation, bulb, leaves, nature, nutrition, nutrient, vegetable patch, cabbage patch, stalk, jalapeno, crop, clove.

Vegetable Jokes

If you’re looking for some very corny vegetable jokes, you’ve come to the right place. All of these one-liner-style vegetable jokes use puns in their punchline. Some are phonetic puns, others are based on a slang phrase or cliche related to vegetables.

  • Why did the cucumber blush? – Because it saw the salad dressing!
  • What do you call an angry pea? – Grump-pea.
  • Why did the potatoes argue? – Because they couldn’t see eye-to-eye.
  • How did the farmer fix his jeans? – With a cabbage patch!
  • Why did the tomato get embarrassed? – Because it saw the chick pea.
  • Which vegetable do Sailors ban from their ships? – Leeks.
  • What did the lettuce say to the celery? – Quit stalking me!
  • What is small, red and whispers? – A hoarse raddish.
  • What is green and goes to summer camp? – A Brussel scout!
  • What do root vegetables wear to bed? – Yammies!
  • What do you call a retired vegetable? – A has-bean.
  • When is a vegetable too fresh? – When he insults the farmer.
  • Why do fungi have to pay double bus fares? – Because they take up too mushroom!
  • What’s the difference between broccoli and boogers? – Kids don’t eat broccoli.
  • Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a cornfield? – There are too many ears.
  • What’s a vegetable’s favourite martial art? – Carot-e!
  • What’s the coolest vegetable? – A rad-ish!
  • Why did the chef quit? – They cut his celery.
  • What did the sweet potato say to the pumpkin? – I yam what I yam.
  • What does a nosey pepper do? – Gets jalapeno business!
  • How do you fix a broken tomato? – Tomato paste.

Vegetable Pun Images

Below is a collection of vegetable-related visual puns and meme-type images. If you’ve created your own visual vegetable puns or found one that we’ve missed, please post us a link in the comments section 🙂

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Did you find the vegetable-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments, below! Are you looking for puns for text messages, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or some other social media platform? Would you like to see more funny vegetable pun images? Or perhaps you just want more vegetable puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’re got any vegetable puns (image or text) that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂