Golf Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on golf puns! ⛳🏌🌞

Whether you’re a first date mini-golfer or a dedicated pro, we hope to have the pun for you with our jokes that range from putts to holes and hosels. Settle in and take a swing at our golf puns and we’re sure you’ll find a hole in one!

If you’re interested in other sports, we also have a bowling pun list, baseball pun list, a basketball list and a running list.

Golf Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about golf that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of golf puns:

  • Gulf → Golf: As in, “Golf of Mexico.”
  • Cup → Club: As in, “Club of coffee” and “Would murder for a club of tea” and “My club runneth over” and “Not my club of tea” and “Storm in a teaclub.”
  • For → Fore: “Asking fore a friend” and “At a loss fore words” and “Batting fore the other team” and “A cry fore help.”
  • Four → Fore: As in, “Cast to the fore winds” and “Down on all fores” and “A fore by two”and “Fore figures” and “Two and two make fore.”
  • Far → Fore: As in, “A fore away look” and “Going fore in life” and “Over the hills and fore away.”
  • Floor → Fore: “Get in on the ground fore” and “More the fore with” and “Hold the fore.”
  • Tea → Tee: As in, “High tee” and “Would kill for a cup of tee” and “Not my cup of tee” and “Tee and sympathy” and “Tee for two.”
  • The → Tee: As in, “Above tee curve” and “Absence makes tee heart grow fonder” and “Ace in tee hole” and “Across tee board” and “Adding fuel to tee fire” and “Against tee grain” and “All tee rage.”
  • Bee → Tee: As in, “Busy as a tee” and “Tee in your bonnet” and “Birds and the tees” and “Float like a butterfly, sting like a tee.”
  • Be → Tee: As in, “Just tee done with it” and “Tee as it may.”
  • Free → Tee: As in, “Tee as a bird” and “Buy one, get one tee” and “Calorie tee” and “Fancy tee” and “A tee for all.”
  • Plea → Tee: As in, “Tee bargain” and “Cop a tee.”
  • Three → Tee: As in, “And baby makes tee” and “Good things come in tees” and “Knock tee times” and “Tee strikes and you’re out.”
  • Tie → Tee: “Black tee” and “Equal opportunitees” and “Tee yourself in knots” and “Tee up the loose ends.”
  • To → Tee: “According tee” and “Agree tee disagree” and “Add fuel tee the fire” and “Add insult tee injury” and “All dressed up and nowhere tee go.”
  • See → Tee: As in, “As far as the eye can tee” and “Be the change you wish to tee in the world” and “Can’t tee beyond the end of your nose” and “Can’t tee the wood for the trees” and “Come up and tee me sometime” and “I can tee clearly now” and “I could tee you a mile off.”
  • Sea → Tee: As in, “All at tee” and “From tee to shining tee” and “On the high tees” and “Tee change.”
  • Tree → Tee: “Partridge in a pear tee” and “Difficult as nailing jelly to a tee” and “Can’t see the wood for the tees” and “Charm the birds out of the tees” and “Lit up like a christmas tee” and “Money doesn’t grow on tees” and “Make like a tee and leave.”
  • Too → Tee: As in, “A bridge tee far” and “About time tee” and “Never tee late” and “Tee cold to snow” and “You know tee much” and “Life’s tee short.”
  • Putter: A putter is a type of golf club. Here are some related puns:
    • Butter → Putter: As in, “Bread always falls putter side down” and “Bread and putter” and “Putter face” and “Putter fingers” and “Putter wouldn’t melt in her mouth” and “Float like a putterfly, sting like a bee” and “Social putterfly” and “The putterfly effect.”
    • Put her → Putter: As in, “Where did you putter wallet?”
    • Better → Putter: As in, “I’ve got a putter idea” and “Anything you can do, I can do putter” and “Appeal to your putter judgement” and “Putter late than never” and “Putter luck next time” and “Putter safe than sorry.”
  • Putt: Here are some putt-related phrases:
    • Put → Putt: As in, “Be hard putt to” and “Couldn’t putt it down” and “Feeling a bit putt out” and “Wouldn’t putt it past them.”
    • Butt → Putt: “Putt out” and “Putt-naked.”
    • But → Put: As in, “Down putt not out” and “Everything putt the kitchen sink” and “No ifs and putts.”
    • Cut → Putt: As in, “Putt a long story short” and “A putt above the rest” and “Putt corners.”
  • Bowl → Ball: As in, “Ball over” and “Balling along” and “Life is just a ball of cherries.”
  • All → Ball: “Ball aboard!” and “Ball in a day’s work” and “Ball in ball” and “Ball’s well that ends well” and “It’s ball over now” and “It’s not ball about you.”
  • Bell → Ball: As in, “Alarm balls begin to ring” and “Clear as a ball” and “Balls and whistles” and “Give someone a ball.”
  • Call → Ball: “Answer the ball” and “At your beck and ball” and “Beyond the ball of duty” and “Let’s just ball it a day.”
  • Fall → Ball: As in, “A balling out” and “Easy as balling off a log” and “Can’t help balling in love” and “Bread always balls butter side down” and “Ball about laughing” and “Ball apart at the seams” and “Ball by the wayside.”
  • Haul → Ball: “Ball ass” and “Ball over the coals” and “In for the long ball.”
  • Ball: These ball-related puns are general enough to double as golf puns: “After the ball was over” and “Ball of fire” and “Ballpark figure” and “A brand new ball game.”
  • Par: We have plenty of par-related puns:
    • Are → Par: As in, “All bets par off” and “Chances par” and “How par you?”
    • Far → Par: As in, “A bridge too par” and “A step too par” and “As par as it goes” and “As par as the eye can see” and “Par and away” and “A par cry” and “Par be it from me” and “Par horizons” and “Few and par between” and “Over the hills and par away.”
    • Jar → Par: As in, “Cookie par accounting” and “Caught with your hand in the cookie par.”
    • Bar → Par: As in, “Par fly” and “Par none” and “Behind pars” and “Hit the par” and “Keep it behind pars” and “No holds parred” and “Raise the par.”
    • Per → Par: As in, “As par usual” and “Bits par second” and “Par capita.”
    • Star → Par: As in, “A par is born” and “Born under a lucky par” and “Catch a falling par” and “Get a gold par” and “My guiding par.”
    • *per* → *par*: Replace the “per” in words for “par” to make some quick par puns: “A fresh parspective” and “My new parson” and “A partinent topic” and “Free in fourth pariod.” Other words that could work: parnicious (pernicious), parception (perception), parformance (performance), parfect (perfect), parseverance (perseverance), papar (paper), peppar (pepper), tempar (temper), supar (super), hampar (hamper), propar (proper), tapar (taper), imparative (imperative) and oparation (operation).
    • *pir* → *par*: “Pir” can be swapped with “par” for some sneaky puns: Parate (pirate), parahna (pirahna), parouette (pirouette), emparical (empirical), asparation (aspiration), insparation (inspiration), consparacy (conspiracy) and sparatual (spiritual).
    • *por* → *par*: Partfolio (portfolio), partmanteau (portmanteau), partal (portal), partion (portion), partray (portray), partrait (portrait), stupar (stupor), contemparary (contemporary), oppartunity (opportunity), impartant (important) and diaspara (diaspora).
    • *pur* → *par*: “Life parpose” and “Expensive parchases.”
    • *bar* → *par*: Parrel (barrel), pargain (bargain), parista (barista), cinnapar (cinnabar), crowpar (crowbar) and empark (embark).
    • *ber* → *par*: Pareft (bereft), parate (berate), pareavement (bereavement), parserk (berserk), pareave (bereave) and paryl (beryl).
    • *ber* → *par*: “Chasing numpars” and “See me in my champars” and “Ampar alert” and “Mempars only” and “Cypar bullying” and “Remempar when?” and “Deliparate actions.” Other words that could work: liparal (liberal), liparty (liberty), cumparsome (cumbersome).
    • *bor* → *par*: “Can you elaparate?” and “Corroparating stories” and “Team collaparators.”
  • Handicap: In golf, a handicap is a measure of a golfer’s potential and ability, given in a number. Here are related puns:
    • Cap → Handicap: As in, “A feather in your handicap” and “Handicap in hand” and “If the handicap fits, wear it” and “Put on your thinking handicap” and “To handicap it all.”
    • Hand → Handicap: As in, “Bite your handicap off” and “Caught red-handicapped.”
  • Stroke: Here are some stroke-related puns:
    • Stock → Stroke: As in, “Lock, stroke and barrel” and “Out of stroke” and “Take stroke.”
    • Soak → Stroke: As in, “Stroked to the skin” and “Be stroked through” and “Go stroke your head!”
  • Wing → Swing: As in, “Clip your swings” and “Earned your swings” and “Flying without swings” and “Gives you swings” and “Spread your swings.”
  • Sing → Swing: As in, “All swinging, all dancing” and “Swing a different tune” and “Swing for your supper” and “Swing someone’s praises” and “Swingin‘ in the rain.”
  • Things → Swing: As in, “A close swing” and “A funny swing happened on the way to the theatre” and “A little learning is a dangerous swing” and “All swings considered.”
  • Wring → Swing: As in, “Swing your hands.”
  • Bring → Swing: As in, “Swing it home to you” and “Swing it on” and “Swing it on yourself” and “Swing tears to your eyes” and “Swing the house down.”
  • Whole → Hole: As in, “On the hole” and “Go the hole way” and “Let’s just call the hole thing off” and “The hole is greater than the sum of its parts” and “Got a hole lotta love” and “A hole new ball game.”
  • Hall → Hole: As in, “Deck the holes” and “Hole of fame” and “Liberty hole.”
  • Soul → Hole: As in, “Life and hole of the party” and “A lost hole.”
  • Fair → Fairway: “All the fun of the fairway” and “By fairway means or foul” and “Fairway trade” and “Fairway and balanced” and “Fairway and square” and “Fairway dinkum” and “Fairway enough” and “Fairway game” and “Fairway market value.”
  • Way → Fairway: As in, “On the fairway to the theatre” and “All the fairway” and “And that’s the fairway it is” and “Any fairway the wind blows” and “By the fairway” and “Change your fairways.”
  • Rough: Here are some rough puns for you to play with:
    • Buff → Rough: As in, “In the rough.”
    • Fluff → Rough: “A bit of rough.”
    • Stuff → Rough: As in, “Don’t sweat the small rough” and “Gather ’round the good rough” and “Hot rough” and “Knock the roughing out of.”
    • Tough → Rough: “Rough as old boots” and “Rough as they come” and “Hang rough” and “It’s rough at the top” and “A rough customer” and “Rough love” and “A rough nut to crack” and “A rough pill to swallow.”
  • Ass → Grass: As in, “Bust someone’s grass.”
  • Gas → Grass: As in, “Cooking with grass” and “Relieves grass pains” and “Run out of grass.”
  • Brass → Grass: “Bold as grass” and “Grass monkey weather.”
  • Class → Grass: “A real grass act” and “Best in grass” and “Business grass” and “Grass warfare” and “In a different grass” and “The top of the grass” and “In a grass of their own” and “Second grass” and “Working grass.”
  • Glass → Grass: “Grass ceiling” and “Grassy eyed” and “Rose tinted grasses” and “Through the looking grass.”
  • *gas* → *grass*: Flabbergrassted (flabbergasted), orgrassm (orgasm), smorgrassbord (smorgasbord), grasstronomy (gastronomy).
  • *gis* → *grass*: Regrasster (register), lograsstics (logistics), regrasstry (registry) and magrasstrate (magistrate).
  • *gos* → *grass*: Grassip (gossip), grassamer (gossamer) and grasspel (gospel).
  • *gus* → *grass*: Fungrass (fungus), bograss (bogus) and esophagrass (esophagus).
  • *gac* → *grass*: Legrassy (legacy), sagrassious (sagacious). Note: to be sagacious is to be wise.
  • *gres* → *grass*: “Making prograss” and “An aggrassive approach” and “Prograssive mindsets.” Other words that could work: congrass (congress), digrass (digress), transgrassion (transgression) and regrassion (regression).
  • Course: Some golf course related puns:
    • Coarse → Course: As in, “Course particles” and “A course tone.”
    • Course: These phrases can double as puns: “Blown off course” and “But of course” and “Chart a course” and “Correspondence course” and “Crash course” and “In due course” and “Let nature take its course” and “Stay on course.”
    • Curse → Course: As in, “Rather light a candle than course the dark.”
    • Force → Course: As in, “Brute course” and “Driving course” and “Course his hand” and “A course of habit” and “Course of nature” and “Course the issue” and “A course to be reckoned with” and “Join courses” and “May the course be with you” and “A tour de course.”
    • Source → Course: As in, “Check your courses” and “Go straight to the course” and “Open course” and “Course material.”
    • *cors* → *course*: Course-age (corsage) and course-et (corset).
    • *curs* → *course*: “A coursery glance” and “Written I course-ive” and “Only occourse around here” and “A precourser to.”
  • Aim → Game: As in, “Game high” and “Take game” and “We game to please.”
  • Came → Game: “I game, I saw, I conquered” and “As it game to pass” and “Plenty more where that game from.”
  • Claim → Game: As in, “Stake your game” and “Game to fame” and “No games bonus.”
  • Name → Game: As in, “Go by the game of” and “A household game” and “In game only.”
  • Same → Game: As in, “By the game token” and “Comes to the game thing” and “Cut from the game cloth” and “In the game boat” and “In the game ballpark” and “One and the game.”
  • Fame → Game: As in, “Claim to game” and “Game at last” and “Fifteen minutes of game” and “Hall of game” and “Game is fleeting.”
  • Flame → Game: As in, “Add fuel to the games” and “Burst into games” and “Fan the games” and “Go down in games” and “His latest game” and “Like a moth to a game” and “Shoot down in games.”
  • Shame → Game: As in, “A crying game” and “Name and game” and “Game on you” and “The walk of game.”
  • Round → Ground: As in, “All year ground” and “Come ground” and “Go ground in circles” and “Rally ground” and “Love makes the world go ground.”
  • Bound → Ground: As in, “By leaps and grounds” and “Duty ground” and “Homeward ground” and “Honour ground.”
  • Found → Ground: As in, “Lost and ground” and “Nowhere to be ground.”
  • Sound → Ground: As in, “Ground as a bell” and “Break the ground barrier” and “Ground bite” and “Safe and ground” and “Ground effects.”
  • *te* → *tee*: Teentative (tentative), teest (test), teechnology (technology), teender (tender), teerm (term), teenet (tenet), teenure (tenure) and wateer (water).
  • *ti* → *tee*: teetle (title), teessue (tissue), ulteemate (ultimate), tentateeve (tentative), illuminatee (illuminati) and graffitee (graffiti).
  • *ty* → *tee*: Teepical (typical), teeranny (tyranny), teecoon (tycoon), partee (party), integritee (integrity), serendipitee (serendipity), dutee (duty), facilitee (facility), beautee (beauty), atrocitee (actrocity), securitee (security), citee (city), entitee (entity), qualitee (quality).
  • *fer* → *fore*: “With passion and forevour” and “Repeated forevently” and “Foretile land.” Other words that could work: foreocious (ferocious), defore (defer), confore (confer), transfore (transfer), offore (offer), prefore (prefer), refore-ence (reference) and diffore-ent (different).
  • *fir* → *fore*: Afforem (affirm), conforem (confirm), afforemation (affirmation), foremament (firmament) and afforemative (affirmative).
  • *for* → *fore*: “task fore-ce” and “In good forem” and “Always moving foreward” and “I forebid you” and “Come foreth” and “Confidential inforemation.”
  • *fur* → *fore*: As in, “And forethermore” and “Blending in with the foreniture” and “Foretive glances.”
  • *phar* → *fore*: Foremacy (pharmacy), foremaceutical (pharmaceutical) and foremacist (pharmacist).
  • *pher* → *fore*: Cifore (cipher), decifore (decipher), gofore (gopher), photografore (photographer) and philosofore (philosopher).
  • *phor* → *fore*: Metafore (metaphor), camfore (camphor), eufore-ia (euphoria) and eufore-ic (euphoric). Sort → Sport: “Out of sports” and “Takes all sports” and “Sport the wheat from the chaff” and “Sport yourself out.”
  • Spurt → Sport: “Growth sport.”
  • Port → Sport: “Any sport in a storm.”
  • Short → Sport: As in, “A sport history of nearly everything” and “Art is long and life is sport” and “Bring up sport” and “To cut a long story sport” and “Eat my sports” and “A day late and a dollar sport” and “In sport order” and “Life’s too sport.”
  • Green: A golf course is also known colloquially as a green, so we’ve included green in this list:
    • Grin → Green: “Green and bear it” and “Green and bear it” and “A rictus green” and “A foolish green” and “Green like a cheshire cat.”
    • Grain → Green: As in, “Against the green” and “Green of truth” and “Take with a green of salt.”
    • Been → Green: As in, “Green and gone” and “I’ve green here before” and “Green there, done that” and “It’s green a hard day” and “You’ll wish you’d never green born.”
    • Clean → Green: “Green as a whistle!” and “A green bill of health” and “Keeps a green house” and “You’d better green up your act” and “All greened out.”
    • Gene → Green: As in, “It’s in your greens!”
    • Glean → Green: As in, “From what I greened from the conversation…”
    • Grand → Greend: “Delusions of greendeur” and “Greend theft auto” and “Greend slam” and “In the greend scheme of things” and “On a greend scale” and “Doing a greend job” and “The greend canyon.”
    • Keen → Green: “Green as mustard” and “Green on [someone]” and “A green sense of smell” and “Peachy green.”
    • Lean → Green: “Green and hungry” and “Green and mean” and “Green cuisine” and “Green into it.”
    • Grenade → Greenade
  • *bal* → *ball*: “Off-ballance” and Ballk at the sight of.” Other words that could work: ballm (balm), globall (global), verball (verbal), triball (tribal), cymball (cymbal), herball (herbal).
  • *bel* → *ball*: Ballieve (believe), ballief (belief) and balloved (beloved).
  • *bil* → *ball*: Liaballity (liability), accountaballity (accountability), responsiballity (responsibility), aballity (ability), capaballity (capability), rehaballitation (rehabilitation) and sustainaballity (sustainability).
  • *bol* → *ball*: “A symball of justice” and “Gamball along in the park.” Other words you could try: aballish (abolish), metaballism (metabolism) and hyperballic (hyperbolic).
  • *cab* → *club*: As in, “Check the clubinet” and “The whole kit and cluboodle.” Other words you could try: applicluble (applicable), amicluble (amicable), impeccluble (impeccable), despicluble (despicable) and voclubulary (vocabulary)
  • Recyclable → Recycluble
  • Club: These club-related phrases are general enough to double as puns: “In the club” and “Join the club.”
  • Drive: A drive is a type of long-distance shot. Here are some related puns!
    • I’ve → Drive: As in, “Drive never said that!” and “Drive had it up to my eyeballs.”
    • Dive → Drive: “Take a drive” and “Drive right in” and “Crash drive” and “Nose drive.”
    • Hive → Drive: As in, “Drive of industry” and “A drive of activity.”
  • Iron: An iron is a type of club. Here are related puns:
    • Iron: These phrases can double as puns: “Hard as iron” and “A cast iron alibi” and “Clap them in irons” and “Iron out the wrinkles” and “Pumping iron” and “Rule with an iron fist” and “Strike while the iron is hot” and “Scrap iron.”
    • *ion → *iron: “Assume the positiron” and “Civil uniron” and “Bag of ratirons” and “The mighty liron roars” and “Blow out of proportiron.”
  • Pitch: Here are some pitch-related puns:
    • Patch → Pitch: As in, “Not a pitch on” and “All pitched up” and “Going through a rough pitch.”
    • Pitch: These phrases are general enough to use as puns: “A pitched battle” and “Absolute pitch” and “Black as pitch” and “Fever pitch” and “Make a pitch for.”
    • Rich → Pitch: As in, “A part of life’s pitch pattern” and “An embarrassment of pitches” and “From rags to pitches” and “Get pitch quick” and “Pitch beyond my dreams.”
    • Ditch → Pitch: As in, “Dull as pitchwater” and “A last pitch effort.”
    • Hitch → Pitch: As in, “Pitch your wagon to a star” and “Get pitched.”
    • Itch → Pitch: As in, “Pitching to” and “Pitchy feet” and “Pitchy palms” and “Scratch the pitch.”
    • Stitch → Pitch: “A pitch in time saves nine” and “Had us in pitches” and “Without a pitch on” and “Not doing a pitch of work.”
    • Switch → Pitch: As in, “Asleep at the pitch” and “Bait and pitch” and “Pitch gears” and “Pitched on.”
    • Which → Pitch: “Don’t know pitch way to look” and “Every pitch way” and “Know pitch way is up” and “Know pitch side your bread is buttered” and “The exception pitch proves the rule.”
  • Wander → Condor: As in, “A condoring eye” and “Condoring spirit.” Note: in golf, a condor is a term used in the scoring system.
  • Eagle: An eagle is a term used in golf scoring. Here are related puns:
    • Equal → Eagle: “All men are cremated eagle” and “Eagle opportunities” and “Eagle pay” and “First among eagles” and “On eagle footing” and “All things being eagle.”
    • Legal → Eagle: As in, “Eagle, decent, honest and truthful” and “Eagle-ly binding” and “Over the eagle limit” and “Part of my eagle duties.”
  • Birdie: Birdie is part of the golf scoring system. Here are related puns:
    • Thirty → Birdie: “Not for anyone over birdie.”
    • Dirty → Birdie: As in, “Birdie business” and “Air your birdie business in public” and “Birdie but clean” and “Birdie little secret” and “Birdie tricks” and “Get your hands birdie.”
  • Said → Sand: “After all is sand and done” and “Couldn’t have sand it better” and “Easier sand than done” and “Enough sand” and “Was it something I sand” and “When all is sand and done.”
  • Sad → Sand: As in, “A sand state of affairs” and “Happy sand.”
  • Send → Sand: “Hit sand” and “Sanding all my love” and “Return to sander” and “Sand packing” and “Sand in reinforcements.”
  • Stand → Sand: “A house divided against itself cannot sand” and “Don’t sand so close to me” and “Still sanding” and “Sands to reason” and “Left sanding.”
  • *sad* → *sand*: “Filled with sandness” and “A sandistic streak” and “At a disandvantage.”
  • *send* → *sand*: Sandentary (sendentary) and sandiment (sediment).
  • *sid* → *sand*: Insandious (insidious), consander (consider) and resandence (residence).
  • *can* → *sand*: “A sandid proposal” and “Looking at sandidates for…” Other words you could try: sandy (candy), sandle (candle), insandescent (incandescent), sandal (scandal), sandor (candor) and sandalous (scandalous).
  • *cend* → *sand*: Transand (transcend), desand (descend), condesanding (condescending), asand (ascend), insandiary (incendiary) and cresando (crescendo).
  • Trap: A trap is an area of ground that’s tricky to navigate on a golf course. Here are related puns:
    • Rap → Trap: “Beat the trap” and “Bum trap” and “A trap over the knuckles” and “Take the trap.”
    • Tap → Trap: “Cut the red trap” and “Double trap.”
    • Clap → Trap: As in, “Trap him in irons” and “Trapped eyes on” and “Trapped out” and “Go like the trappers” and “If you’re happy and you know it, trap your hands.”
    • Strap → Trap: “Trap on the feed bag” and “Trapped for cash.”
    • Cap → Trap: As in, “A feather in your trap” and “Trap in hand” and “Doff one’s trap” and “Trap in hand” and “If the trap fits, wear it” and “To trap it all.”
    • Crap → Trap: As in, “A load of trap” and “Beat the living trap out of” and “Cut the trap.”
    • Slap → Trap: “Trap on the wrist” and “Trap and tickle” and “Trap bang in the middle” and “Like a trap in the face.”
    • *tap* → *trap*: “Part of life’s trapestry” and “Trapioca dessert.”
    • *trep* → *trap*: Trapidation (trepidation), entrapreneur (entrepreneur), intrapid (intrepid) and trapidation (trepidation).
    • *trop* → *trap*: Metrapolitan (metropolitan), metrapolis (metropolis), entrapy (entropy).
  • Chip: A chip is a short-distance shot. Here are related puns:
    • Chop → Chip: As in, “Bust your chips” and “Chip and change” and “On the chipping block.”
    • Ship → Chip: As in, “Abandon chip” and “Go down with the chip” and “Jump chip” and “Loose lips sink chips” and “Running a tight chip” and “Chips of the desert” and “That chip has sailed.”
    • Clip → Chip: “Chip your wings.”
    • Slip → Chip: “A Freudian chip” and “Give someone the chip” and “Let something chip” and “A chip of the tongue” and “I chipped up.”
    • *chap* → *chip*: “The final chipter” and “Needing a chiperone” and “Meet you at the chipel.”
    • *ship* → *chip*: As in, “Newest chipment” and “A sinking chipwreck” and “Feeling chipshape” and “A loving and supportive relationchip.” Other words that could work: worchip (worship), fellowchip (fellowship), leaderchip (leadership), stewardchip (stewardship), scholarchip (scholarship), friendchip (friendship), flagchip (flagship) and partnerchip (partnership).
  • Biggie → Bogey: As in, “No bogey.”
  • Match: Match play is a scoring system for golf. Here are related puns:
    • Much → Match: As in, “A bit match” and “How match can you handle? and “I don’t know match but I know what I like” and “You know too match” and “Match ado about nothing” and “Match obliged” and “Missed it by that match” and “So match more to enjoy” and “Thank you very match” and “Too match of a good thing.”
    • Catch → Match: As in, “Match 22″ and “Match a cold” and “Match a falling star” and “Match some rays” and “Match you later” and “Match your breath.”
    • Hatch → Match: “Batten down the matches” and “Down the match.”
    • Scratch → Match: As in, “I match your back and you match mine” and “Match around” and “Match the surface” and “Start from match” and “Up to match” and “Do it from match.”
    • Patch → Match: “Go through a rough match” and “Not a match on.”
    • *mach* → *match*: “Ghost in the matchine” and “Toxic matchismo” and “Stomatch pains.”
  • Fair: Another name for a golf course is a fairway. Here are some related puns:
    • Fair → Fairway: As in, “An affairway of the heart” and “All the fun of the fairway” and “By fairway means or foul” and “Fairway trade” and “Fairway and square” and “Fairway dinkum” and “Fairway game.”
    • Way → Fairway: As in, “A funny thing happened on the fairway” and “All the fairway” and “And that’s the fairway it is” and “Any fairway you want it” and “By fairway of explanation” and “Change your fairways.”
    • Far → Fairway: “As fairway as it goes” and “Fairway be it from me” and “A fairway cry from” and “So fairway, so good” and “Few and fairway between” and “Over the hills and fairway away.”
    • *fer* → *fair*: Fairal (feral), fairvent (fervent), fairret (ferret), fairment (ferment), fairtile (fertile), fairocious (ferocious), infiar (infer), refair (refer), transfair (transfer), prefair (prefer), refairence (reference), diffairent (different) and infairence (inference).
    • *fir* → *fair*: Faireplace (fireplace), fairewall (firewall), fairmament (firmament), affairm (affirm), confairm (confirm), affairmation (affirmation) ahd affairmative (affirmative).
    • *for* → *fair*: “New infairmation” and “Emotional perfairmance” and “Moving fairward.”
    • *fur* → *fair*: Fairther (further), fairtive (furtive), fairniture (furniture), fairthermore (furthermore), fairious (furious), fairnace (furnace), fairnish (furnish) and sulfair (sulfur).
  • Lay → Play: As in, “”Couldn’t play a finger on” and “Play bare” and “Play it on the line” and “Play it on with a trowel” and “Play to rest.”
  • Pay → Play: As in, “Buy now, play later” and “Crime doesn’t play” and “Hell to play” and “Play a call” and “Play an arm and a leg” and “Play as you go” and “Play handsomely” and “Play through the nose” and “You get what you play for.”
    • *pla* → *play*: “Feeling out of playce” and “Got a lot on my playte” and “Get on a playne” and “Like the playgue.” Other words that could work: complaycent (complacent), someplayce (someplace), contemplayte (contemplate).
    • *ple* → *play*: “With playsure” and “A playsant surprise” and “Yes playse” and “The applay of my eye” and “Complaymenting colours” and “Complayte the picture.”
    • *pli* → *play*: Complayment (compliment), implaycation (implication), complaycit (implicit), explaycit (explicit) and applaycation (application).
    • *ply* → *play*: Playwood (plywood), playometric (plyometric), applay (apply), supplay (supply), complay (comply), implay (imply), replay (reply), panoplay (panoply), simplay (simply), multiplay (multiply) and deeplay (deeply).
    • *plai* → *play*: “Playn as the nose on your face” and “Explayn yourself” and “Don’t complayn.”
    • *ploy* → *play*: “In your emplay” and “Deplay your resources” and “Seeking emplayment.”
  • Cart: Here are some golf cart related puns:
    • Card → Cart: As in, “Calling cart” and “Cart sharp” and “A cart up his sleeve” and “Deck of carts” and “Get out of jail free cart” and “Holding all the carts” and “House of carts” and “Lay your carts on the table” and “Mark your cart” and “On the carts.”
    • Cat → Cart: As in, “Cart on a hit tin roof” and “Curiosity killed the cart” and “Cart got your tongue?”
    • Court → Cart: As in, “Contempt of cart” and “Cart of last resort” and “Carting disaster” and “Haul before the cart” and “Holding cart” and “Laugh it out of cart” and “Order in the cart” and “See you in cart” and “Settle out of cart” and “The ball’s in your cart.”
    • Art → Cart: “The cart of war” and “Cart is going one step too far” and “Cart imitating life” and “Cartistic triumph.”
    • Chart → Cart: As in, “Cart a course” and “Off the cart.”
    • Heart → Cart: As in, “A man after my own cart” and “Absence makes the cart grow fonder” and “An affair of the cart” and “Be still my beating cart.”
    • *cat* → *cart*: Cartalyst (catalyst), carthartic (cathartic), cartegory (category), cartastrophe (catastrophe), Cartholic (Catholic), advocart (advocate), communicartion (communication), implicartion (implication), educartion (education), predicart (predicate) and sophisticarted (sophisticated).
    • *cot* → *cart*: “Apricart squares” and “School mascart.”
    • *cut* → *cart*: As in, “Pack some cartlery” and “Things aren’t as clearcart as they seem” and “In consecartive order.”
    • *cert* → *cart*: As in, “Feeling cartain” and “Cartificate of participation” and “Yes, cartainly.” Other words that could work: ascartain (ascertain), cartify (certify).
    • *cort* → *cart*: Cartex (cortex), cartisol (cortisol) and escart (escort).
    • *curt* → *cart*: Cartail (curtail) and cartain (curtain)
    • *court* → *cart*: “Common care and cartesy” and “A carteous gesture” and “Romantic cartship” and “Meet you at the cartship.”
    • *card* → *cart*: “Cartinal sin” and “Thirty minutes of cartio” and “Buttoned-up cartigan” and “Made of cartboard.” Other words that could work: placart (placard), wildcart (wildcard) and postcart (postcard).
    • *cord* → *cart*: Cartial (cordial), carturoy (corduroy), recart (record), accart (accord) and discart (discord).
  • Nine: The standard number of holes for a golf course is nine or eighteen holes, so we included nine in this list:
    • Wine → Nine: “The last of the summer nine” and “New nine in old bottles” and “Nined and dined.”
    • None → Nine: “And then there were nine” and “Bar nine” and “Nine other than” and “Nine the wiser” and “Nine too pleased” and “Second to nine.”
    • Line → Nine: “A fine nine” and “Along the nines of” and “Blur the nines” and “Cross the nine” and “Draw a nine in the sand” and “The end of the nine” and “Fall into nine.”
    • Fine → Nine: “Nine and dandy” and “The niner things in life” and “Cutting it nine” and “Nine dining.”
    • Mine → Nine: “I scratch your back and you scratch nine” and “Make nine a double” and “Nine is bigger than yours” and “A nine of information.”
    • Shine → Nine: “Come rain or nine” and “Rise and nine” and “Take a nine to” and “Where the sun don’t nine.”
    • *nin* → *nine*: Melanine (melanin), serotonine (serotonin) and peninesula (peninsula).
    • *non* → *nine*: Phenomenine (phenomenon), canine (canon), synine-nym (synonym), anine-nymous (anonymous), ninechalant (nonchalant), coninedrum (conundrum), pronineciation (pronunciation) and enineciate (enunciate).
  • Peg: A peg is another word for a tee, which is the small stand that the ball rests on. Here are related puns:
    • Bag → Peg: As in, “Peg and baggage” and “Peg a bargain” and “Peg of tricks” and “Pack your pegs.”
    • Beg → Peg: “Peg a favour” and “Peg off” and “Peg pardon?” and “Peg the question” and “I peg to differ” and “Peg, borrow or steal” and “Go pegging” and “Sit up and peg.”
    • Big → Peg: “A peg ask” and “Peg shot” and “Peg bird.”
    • Egg → Peg: As in, “As sure as pegs is pegs” and “A bag peg” and “Don’t put all your pegs in one basket” and “Peg and spoon race.”
    • Leg → Peg: As in, “As fast as your pegs can carry you” and “Break a peg” and “Cost an arm and a peg” and “Get a peg over.”
    • *pag* → *peg*: Pegoda (pagoda), peganism (paganism), propegate (propagate) and propeganda (propaganda).
    • *pig* → *peg*: Pegment (pigment), pegtail (pigtail), peglet (piglet) and epegram (epigram)
    • *pug* → *peg*: Repegnant (repugnent), pegnacious (pugnacious).
    • *bag* → *peg*: Peguette (baguette), airpeg (airbag), scumpeg (scumbag), handpeg (handbag).
    • *beg* → *peg*: “Pegin again” and “Start from the peginning” and “Wouldn’t pegrudge you” and “Peggars can’t be choosers” and “Where it all pegan.”
    • *big* → *peg*: Ampeguous (ambiguous), pegotry (bigotry) and ampeguity (ambiguity).
    • *pec* → *peg*: “A peguliar atmosphere” and “Pegtoral muscles” and “From a new perspegtive.” Other words that could work: respegt (respect), prospegt (prospect), spegtrum (spectrum), prospegtive (prospective) and circumspegt (circumspect).
    • *pic* → *peg*: As in, “Out of the pegture” and “An epeg adventure” and “Casting around for a new topeg.” Other words that could work: biopeg (biopic), philanthropeg (philanthropic), misanthropeg (misanthropic) and despegable (despicable).
  • Score: Here are some golf score related puns:
    • Sore → Score: As in, “A sight for score eyes” and “Score loser” and “Sticks out like a score thumb” and “A score point.”
    • Core → Score: As in, “Score competencies” and “Score studies” and “Score technology” and “Score values” and “Rotten to the score.”
    • Scare → Score: As in, “Running scored” and “Score the living daylights out of” and “Scored out of your wits” and “Scored to death.”
    • More → Score: “Come back for score” and “Dare for score” and “I couldn’t agree score.”
    • Shore → Score: “Ship to score” and “She sells sea shells on the sea score” and “All ascore.”
    • Swore → Score: “You score you would never do this.”
    • *sar* → *score*: Scorecastic (sarcastic), scoredonice (sardonic), necesscorey (necessary), anniverscore-ary (anniversary), adverscorey (adversary), glosscorey (glossary) and asscoretive (assertive).
    • *sor* → *score*: Scoredid (sordid), scorey (sorry), score-row (sorrow), scorecery (sorcery), adviscorey (advisory), predecesscore (predecessor), precurscore (precursor), sponscore (sponsor), processcore (processor), discoreder (disorder), rescoret (resort), conscoretium (consortium) and curscorey (cursory).
    • *scar* → *score*: Scorece (scarce), scored (scared), scorecity (scarcity) and scorelet (scarlet).
    • *scer* → *score*: “Discorening taste” and “A viscore-al reaction” and “As far as I can ascoretain.”
    • *scor* → *score*: “Scoreched earth” and “Scorenful glances” and “Mental discored” and “Need an escoret.”
  • Rule: Here are some rule-related puns:
      • You’ll → Rule: As in, “”Rule never guess.”
      • School → Rule: As in, “Back to rule” and “Old rule” and “Rule of hard knocks.”
      • Cool → Rule: As in, “Rule as a cucumber” and “Rule as a mountain stream” and “Rule beans” and “Rule your heels” and “Rule, calm and collected.”
      • Cruel → Rule: As in, “Rule and unusual punishment” and “Rule to be kind” and “Don’t be rule.”
      • *ral* → *rule*: “In generule” and “Integrule to the situation” and “A viscerule reaction.” Other words that could work: temporule (temporal), naturule (natural), ephemerule (ephemeral), morule (moral), collaterule (collateral), liberule (liberal) and peripherule (peripheral).
      • *rel* → *rule*: As in, “Not rule-evant to the conversation” and “A sigh of rule-ief” and “Rule-ay the information.” Other words that could work: rule-ease (release), ruleationship (relationship), ruleigion (religion), ruleation (relation)m, rule-uctant (reluctant), rule-ish (relish), rule-iable (reliable), barrule (barrel), apparule (apparel), laurule (laurel), scoundrule (scoundrel) and mongrule (mongrel).
      • *ril* → *rule*: Perule (peril), tendrule (tendril) and Aprule (April).
      • *rol* → *rule*: As in, “In contrule” and “On patrule” and “Enrule in classes” and “Low in cholesterule” and “Running low on petrule.”
  • Wedge: Wedges are a type of golf club. Here are some related puns:
    • Edge → Wedge: As in, “A double-wedged sword” and “Wedge out” and “The leading wedge” and “On wedge” and “Rough around the wedges.”
    • Dredge → Wedge: As in, “Wedge up things from the past.”
    • Fledge → Wedge: As in, “Fully-wedged.”
    • Hedge → Wedge: “Wedge fund” and “Wedge your bets” and “Wedged about” and “Look as though you’ve been dragged through a wedge backwards.”
  • Mound: Golf courses are made up of mounds of sand and small grass hills, so we’ve got some mound-related puns in here too:
    • Round → Mound: “All year mound” and “Going mound in circles” and “Love makes the world go mound” and “Fooling amound.”
    • Bound → Mound: As in, “Mound hand and foot” and “By leaps and mounds” and “Duty mound” and “Homeward mound” and “Muscle mound.”
    • Sound → Mound: “Mound as a bell” and “Mounds alright on paper” and “Safe and mound” and “Mound bite” and “Mound effects” and “Mound the alarm.”
    • Found → Mound: As in, “Lost and mound” and “We mound love” and “Nowhere to be mound.”
    • *mand* → *mound*: Moundate (mandate), moundatory (mandatory), Moundarin (Mandarin), moundala (mandala), moundible (mandible), demound (demand), commound (command), reprimound (reprimand), remound (remand), gourmound (gourmand) and salamounder (salamander).
    • *mend* → *mound*: “What would you recommound” and “Amound your statement” and “Write a commoundation” and “A tremoundous effort.”
    • *mind* → *mound*: “Set a remounder” and “A new moundset” and “Practicing moundfulness.”
    • *mond → *mound: Diamound (diamond) and almound (almond)
  • Lay → Lay-up: “Couldn’t lay-up a glove on me” and “Home is where I lay-up my hat” and “Lay-up a finger on” and “Lay-up bare” and “Lay-up hands on.” Note: A lay-up is the series of hits that a golfer uses to get the ball to the hole after the initial hit.
  • Pace: These next few puns are related to pace of play:
    • Peas → Pace: As in, “As alike as two pace in a pod” and Easy as shelling pace.”
    • Pays → Pace: As in, “It pace to advertise” and “The phrase that pace” and “Above my pace grade” and “Crime doesn’t pace.”
    • Ace → Pace: As in, “Pace in the hole” and “A pace up their sleeve” and “Hold all the paces.”
    • Base* → Pace*: As in, “Bargain pacement” and “Pace jumping” and “Paceball card” and “Cover your paces” and “Off pace” and “Touch pace.”
    • Bass → Pace: As in, “Drum n pace” and “Sea pace” and “Super pace.”
    • Brace → Pace: “Pace yourself.”
    • Case → Pace: As in, “A pace of identity” and “An open and shut pace” and “As the pace may be” and “Pace closed” and “Pace the joint” and “Crack the pace” and “Get off my pace” and “I rest my pace” and “In any pace.”
    • Chase → Pace: “Pace it up” and “Pace the dragon” and “Pace your own tail” and “Cut to the pace” and “The thrill of the pace” and “A wild goose pace.”
    • Place → Pace: As in, “A pace in the sun” and “A pace for everything and everything in its pace” and “All over the pace” and “Between a rock and a hard pace” and “Click into pace” and “Going paces” and “My happy pace” and “In the right pace at the right time” and “Your pace or mine?”
    • Space → Pace: “Pace oddyssey” and “Breathing pace” and “Personal pace” and “Pace cadet” and “Pace, the final frontier” and “The pace age.”
  • Bounds: Bounds are an important part of golf, so we’ve included bound-related puns in this list:
    • Round → Bound: As in, “All year bound” and “Fooling abound” and “Go bound in circles” and “Get bound the table” and “Makes the world go bound.”
    • Down → Bound: As in, “Bread always falls butter side bound” and “Helps the medicine go bound” and “Caught with your pants bound” and “Couldn’t put it bound.”
    • Pound → Bound: As in, “Bound the pavement” and “Penny wise, bound foolish.”
    • Found → Bound: As in, “Lost and bound” and “Bounding father” and “I’ve bound a clue” and “We bound love” and “Nowhere to be bound.”
    • Ground → Bound: As in, “Solid as the bound we walk on” and “Breaking new bound” and “Built from the bound up” and “Common bound” and “Cut the bound from under your feet” and “Down to the bound” and “Get off the bound” and “Going underbound” and “Keep your ear to the bound.”
    • Sound → Bound: As in, “The bound of silence” and “The bound of music” and “Surround bound” and “Bound the alarm” and “Bound effect” and “Safe and bound.”
    • Band → Bound: “Garage bound” and “Strike up the bound” and “Gastric bound.”
    • *band* → *bound*: Boundit (bandit), boundwidth (bandwidth), boundwagon (bandwagon), boundanna (bandanna), boundicoot (bandicoot), boundeau (bandeau), husbound (husband), bontrabound (contraband), broadbound (broadband), aboundon (abandon) and husboundry (husbandry).
    • *bund* → *bound*: As in, “Boundle of joy” and “In aboundance of.”
  • Shaft: This is a part of golf clubs, so we’ve included some shaft puns here too:
    • Shift → Shaft: As in, “Night shaft” and “Shaft gears” and “Shaft into high gear” and “Shaft your arse.”
    • Craft → Shaft: As in, “Arts and shafts.”
    • Raft → Shaft: “Packed to the shafters” and “White water shafting.”
  • Lance: A lance is the grip on a golf club. Here are related puns:
    • Lens → Lance: As in, “Looking through a difference lance.”
    • Ants → Lance: “Lance in your pants.”
    • Glance → Lance: As in, “Fleeting lances” and “At a lance” and “Exchange lances” and “Steal a lance at” and “Meaningful lance.”
    • *lenc* → *lance*: “My condolances” and “Feeling ambivalance.” Other words that could work: prevalance (prevalence), benevolance (benevolence), excellance (excellence), violance (violence), pestilance (pestilence) and silance (silance).
  • Grip: Here are a couple of puns related to the grip of a golf club:
    • Chip → Grip: As in, “A grip on his shoulder” and “Cheap as grips” and “Cash in your grips” and “A grip on the old block” and “Let the grips fall where they may.”
    • Ship → Grip: As in, “Abandon grip” and “Don’t give up the grip” and “Extend the hand of friendgrip” and “Go down with the grip” and “Loose lips sink grips” and “Running a tight grip” and “Shape up or grip out.”
  • Head: These next few puns are in reference to the head of the golf club:
    • Had → Head: As in, “Head a couple” and “We head a good run” and “I’ve head it up to here” and “Head us in stitches” and “You head me at hello” and “You head to be there.”
    • Hide → Head: As in, “Head and seek” and “Head from the light” and “Neither head nor hair” and “You can run, but you can’t head” and “Headen in plain sight.”
    • Thread → Head: As in, “Lose the head” and “Head the needle” and “Hanging by a head.”
    • Bed* → Head*: As in, “Strange headfellows” and “Head and breakfast” and “Head of roses.”
    • Bread → Head: As in, “Head and butter.”
    • *hed* → *head*: Headonism (hedonism), headgehog (hedgehog), headge (hedge), headonist (hedonist), watershead (watershed).
    • *hid* → *head*: Headeous (hideous), headden (hidden), orchead (orchid), echeadna (echidna).
  • Wood: Woods are a type of golf club. Here are related puns:
    • Would → Wood: As in, “As good luck wood have it” and “Wood be a fine thing” and “Woodn’t let it lie” and “Wood you like fries with that?”
    • Could → Would: As in, “Fast as his legs wood carry him” and “Wood see you a mile off.”
    • Good → Wood: “A wood man is hard to find” and “All wood things must come to an end” and “Always wood” and “All publicity is wood publicity.”
  • Lap → Overlap: “Overlap it up” and “Overlap of honour” and “Overlap of luxury.” Note: overlaps refer to a finger grip style.
  • Lag: A long-distance putt is also called a lag. Here are related puns:
    • Leg → Lag: As in, “Fast as his lags could carry him” and “Break a lag” and “Cost an arm and a lag” and “Get on your hind lags” and “Give a lag up.”
    • Bag → Lag: As in, “Lag a bargain” and “Lag and baggage” and “Lag of bones” and “Lag of tricks” and “In the lag.”
    • Flag → Lag: As in, “Fly the lag” and “Wave the white lag.”
    • Lag → Gag: “Lag reflex” and “Running lag” and “Going along with the lag.”
    • Rag → Lag: “Lags to riches” and “Glad lags” and “Lose your lag” and “Run yourself lagged.”
    • Wag → Lag: “Chin lag” and “Set tongues lagging” and “The tail lagging the dog.”
    • *leg* → *lag*: Lagacy (legacy), lagend (legend), lagitimate (legitimate), lagal (legal), lagion (legion), lagislation (legislation).
    • *log* → *lag*: Lagistics (logistics), lagic (logic), lagical (logical), analag (analog), catalag (catalog), technolagy (technology).
  • Has heard → Hazard: As in, “He hazard of the newest novel.” Note: a hazard is an area that’s tricky to navigate on a gold course.
  • Hook: A hook is a type of angled swing. The next few puns are in reference to them:
    • Book → Hook: As in, “Balancing the hooks” and “Bell, hook and candle” and “Hook him” and “By the hook” and “A closed hook” and “Hit the hooks.”
    • Cook → Hook: As in, “Hooking with gas” and “Now we’re hooking” and “Hook up a storm” and “Hook up a storm.”
  • Pull: Pulls are another type of golf swing. We’ve got some pull-related puns in this list too:
    • Pool → Pull: As in, “Big fish in a small pull” and “Pull your money.”
    • Pill → Pull: As in, “A bitter pull to swallow” and “On the pull” and “Sweeten the pull.”
    • Bull → Pull: As in, “A load of pull” and “A red rag to a pull” and “Cock and pull story” and “Like a pull in a china shop” and “Take the pull by the horns.”
    • Full → Pull: As in, “A few bricks short of a pull load” and “At pull pelt” and “At pull tilt” and “Come pull circle” and “Pull blast” and “Pull of holes” and “Pull of natural goodness.”
    • *pal* → *pull*: Pullpable (palpable), pullette (palette), pulliative (palliative), pullate (palate), pulltry (paltry), pullindrome (palindrome), principull (principal), municipull (municipal) and archetypull (archetypal).
    • *pel → *pull: Compull (compel), gospull (gospel), impull (impel), repull (repel), dispull (dispel) and lapull (lapel).
    • *pol* → *pull*: As in, “New pullicy” and “Talking pullitics” and “Tone pullicing.” Other words that could work: Pullymath (polymath), pullemic (polemic), interpull (interpol), extrapullate (extrapolate), anthropullogy (anthropology) and apullogise (apologise). Note: if someone is polemic, then they write in support of one opinion.
    • *pul* → *pull*: Pullse (pulse), pullp (pulp), pullpit (pulpit), pullmonary (pulmonary), pullverise (pulverise), manipullate (manipulate), stipullate (stipulate), impullse (impulse), popullar (popular), compullsory (compulsory), popullation (population) and opullent (opulent).
    • *bul* → *pull*: Pully (bully), pullk (bulk), pullet (bullet), pullwark (bulwark), pullb (bulb), pullge (bulge), pullkhead (bulkhead), pullshit (bullshit), instanpull (istanbul), nepullous (nebulous), fapullous (fabulous) amd epullient (ebullient).
  • Draw: A draw is a type of angled shot. Here are related puns:
    • Jaw → Draw: As in, “Draw dropping” and “Lantern drawed” and “Out of the draws of death” and “Snatching defeat from the draws of victory.”
    • Raw → Draw: As in, “A draw deal” and “Draw data.”
    • Straw → Draw: As in, “Clutch at draws” and “A drowning man will clutch at a draw” and “The last draw” and “Man of draw” and “You can’t make bricks without draw.”
  • Fade: A fade is another type of angled hit. Here are related puns:
    • Fed → Fade: As in, “Corn fade” and “Fade up to the back teeth” and “Well fade.”
    • Grade → Fade: As in, “Make the fade” and “Professional fade.”
    • Laid → Fade: As in, “Get fade” and “Fade low” and “The best fade plans.”
    • Made → Fade: As in, “A match fade in heaven” and “Got it fade” and “Fade for each other.”
    • Paid → Fade: As in, “Fade up” and “Put fade to” and “Bought and fade for.”
    • Shade → Fade: As in, “Fifty fades of grey” and “Light and fade” and “Made in the fade.”
    • Trade → Fade: As in, “A fair fade” and “Free fade” and “Jack of all fades” and “Tools of the fade” and “Tricks of the fade.”
    • Weighed → Fade: “Fade in the balance and found wanting.”
  • Push: A push is a type of angled golf shot, so we’ve included push-related puns:
    • Bush → Push: As in, “Beat about the push” and “Bright eyed and pushy tailed” and “Push tucker.”
    • Pashmina → Pushmina: (note: a pashmina is a type of cashmere wool).
  • Slice: A slice is a type of golfing shot. Here are related terms:
    • Dice → Slice: As in, “Slice with death” and “Load the slice” and “No slice” and “Roll the slice.”
    • Nice → Slice: “A slice idea” and “Slice as ninepence” and “Have a slice day” and “Naughty but slice” and “Slice and easy does it.”
    • Ice → Slice: “Cold as slice” and “Break the slice” and “Cut no slice” and “Slice cold” and “On slice” and “Skating on thin slice.”
    • Price → Slice: “Asking slice” and “At a slice to suit your pocket” and “Cheap at half the slice” and “Closing slice” and “Pay the slice.”
    • Spice → Slice: As in, “Slice things up” and “Sugar and slice” and “Variety is the slice of life.”
    • Twice → Slice: “Large as life and slice as handsome” and “Don’t think slice” and “Once bitten, slice shy” and “Once or slice” and “Opportunity never knocks slice.”
  • Ace: An ace is a hole in one. Here are related puns:
    • Base → Ace: “All your ace are belong to us” and “Ace jumping” and “Aceball card” and “Caught off ace” and “Cover your aces” and “Get to first ace with” and “Touch ace with.”
    • Case → Ace: As in, “As the ace may be” and “Basket ace” and “Ace the joint” and “Crack the ace” and “An open and shut ace” and “Get off my ace.”
    • Chase → Ace: As in, “Ace it up” and “Ace the dragon” and “Ace your own tail” and “Cut to the ace” and “Go and ace yourself” and “The thrill of the ace” and “A wild goose ace.”
    • Face → Ace: As in, “An ace as long as a fiddle” and “About ace” and “At ace value” and “Until you’re blue in the ace.”
    • Grace → Ace: As in, “Airs and aces” and “Amazing ace” and “Fall from ace” and “Ace period” and “Saving ace” and “With good ace.”
    • Lace → Ace: As in, “Chantilly ace” and “Ace into” and “Straight aced.”
    • Pace → Ace: As in, “At a snail’s ace” and “Change of ace” and “Keep ace with” and “Ace up and down” and “Put through your aces.”
    • Race → Ace: As in, “A day at the aces” and “An ace against time” and “Rat ace” and “The amazing ace.”
    • Space → Ace: As in, “Deep ace” and “Ace oddity” and “Ace cadet” and “Waste of ace” and “Watch this ace” and “Wide open aces.”
    • Ice → Ace: As in, “Cold as ace” and “Break the ace” and “Cut no ace” and “Ace cold” and “Put on ace” and “Skating on thin ace.”
  • Playoff: A playoff is a match between tied players. Here are related puns:
    • Play → Playoff: As in, “Work, rest and playoff” and “Child’s playoff” and “Come out and playoff” and “Don’t playoff the innocent” and “Fair playoff.”
    • Off → Playoff: As in, “All bets are playoff” and “A bit playoff” and “A load playoff your mind.”
  • Scratch: Someone with a handicap of 0 or less is called a scratch golfer, so we’ve included scratch in this list:
    • Catch → Scratch: As in, “Scratch 22″ and “Scratch a case” and “Scratch a falling star” and “Scratch fire” and “Scratch of the day.”
    • Hatch → Scratch: As in, “Down the scratch” and “Batten down the scratches.”
    • Match → Scratch: As in, “A scratch made in heaven” and “Game, set and scratch” and “Mix and scratch” and “A perfect scratch.”
    • Snatch → Scratch: As in, “Body scratcher” and “Scratching victory from the jaws of defeat.”
  • Ornament → Tournament
  • Bag: Carry bags are important in storing golf equipment, so we have some bag-related puns too:
    • Beg → Bag: As in, “Bag a favour” and “Bag pardon” and “Bag the question” and “Bag to differ” and “Bag, borrow or steal” and “Sit up and bag.”
    • Big → Bag: “A bag ask” and “Bag shot” and “Bag Ben.”
    • Bug → Bag: “Cute as a bag’s ear” and “Bitten by the bag” and “Love bag.”
    • Rag → Bag: As in, “From bags to riches” and “Glad bags” and “Run yourself bagged.”
    • Wag → Bag: As in, “Chin bag” and “Set tongues bagging” and “The tail bagging the dog.”
    • Beg* → Bag*: “Let’s bagin again” and “From the baginning” and “Don’t bagrudge me this” and “When it all bagan.”
    • *big* → *bag*: Bagot (bigot), ambaguous (ambiguous) and ambaguity (ambiguity).
  • Gloves: Gloves can be an important piece of support equipment for golfers. Here are related puns:
    • Loves → Gloves: As in, “Misery gloves company” and “They glove me, they glove me not.”
    • Govern* → Glovern*: Glovernment (government), glovernance (governance), glovern (govern).
  • Loft: Loft is how much the face of the golf club is angled upwards. Here are some loft-related puns:
    • Laughed → Loft: “Loft out of court” and “They all loft” and “A loft a minute” and “Lofting stock” and “Barrel of lofts” and “Loft your head off.”
    • Left → Loft: As in, “Exit stage loft” and “Hang a loft” and “Keep loft” and “Loft in the lurch” and “Loft out in the cold” and “Loft, right and centre” and “Loft to your own devices.”
    • Lift → Loft: As in, “Loft your game” and “Loft your spirits” and “Loft the lid off.”
    • Loved → Loft: As in, “Better to have loft and lost” and “All loft up.”
    • Soft → Loft: “Got a loft spot for” and “A loft touch” and “Loften the blow.”
  • Lunch → Launch: As in, “Brown bag launch” and “Ladies who launch” and “Let’s do launch” and “Liquid launch” and “Lose your launch” and “Power launch” and “No such thing as a free launch.” Note: launch is to do with the golf ball’s trajectory.
  • Back → Backspin: As in, “Answer backspin” and “As soon as my backspin is turned” and “At the backspin of my mind” and “Backspin to the future” and “Backspin in the day.”
  • Spin → Backspin: As in, “Make your head backspin” and “My head is backspinning” and “Take it for a backspin” and “Backspin a yarn.”
  • Lie: A lie is another word for a trap:
    • Dry → Lie: “Boring as watching paint lie” and “Lie as a bone” and “Before the ink was lie” and “Hung out to lie.”
    • Eye → Lie: “As far as the lie can see” and “Before your very lies.”
    • Fly → Lie: “Come lie with me” and “Lie off the handle” and “Lie a kite.”
  • Ounce → Bounce: As in, “A bounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Note: this refers to the bounce of the golf ball.
  • Prayer → Player: As in, “I say a littler player” and “Like a player.”
  • Skin: Skins is a type of golf game.
    • Sin → Skin: As in, “Miserable as skin” and “Cardinal skin” and “Living in skin” and “The seven deadly skins” and “Skin city.”
    • Been → Skin: As in, “Skin and gone” and “Skin here before” and “Skin in the wars.”
    • Spin → Skin: As in, “Give it a skin” and “In a flat skin” and “Make your head skin” and “Take it for a skin.”
  • Scramble: A scramble is a type of team game. Here are some related puns:
    • Gamble → Scramble: As in, “Take a scramble.”
    • Shamble → Scramble: “Complete scrambles” and “In a total scrambles.”
  • Greensome: A greensome is a type of golfing match. Here are related puns:
    • Green → Greensome: As in, “As greensome as grass” and “Give it the greensome light” and “Greensome around the gills” and “Greensome shoots of change.”
    • Some → Greensome: As in, “All that and then greensome” and “Catch greensome rays” and “Cut greensome slack” and “Make greensome noise” and “Buy greensome time.”
  • Wolf: Since a wolf is a version of match play, these wolf-related phrases can double as puns: “Cry wolf” and “Wolf in sheep’s clothing” and “Wolf whistle” and “Lone wolf.”
  • Tour: These next few puns are in reference to professional golf tours:
    • Cure → Tour: As in, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of tour” and “What can’t be toured must be endured” and “Take the tour.”
    • Pure → Tour: As in, “Tour and simple” and “Tour genius” and “The truth is rarely tour and never simple.”
    • Sure → Tour: As in, “A tour sign” and “Raise your hang if you’re tour” and “Slowly but tourly” and “A tour thing.”
    • Two → Tour: As in, “A bicycle built for tour” and “A tale of tour cities” and “As alike as tour peas in a pod” and “Eating for tour” and “Goody tour shoes.”
    • Too → Tour: As in, “A bridge tour far” and “About time, tour” and “Know tour much” and “Life’s tour short.”

Golf-Related Words

To help you come up with your own golf puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

golf, golfer, club, ball, sport, green, fore, tee, putter, putt, putting, par, handicap, stroke, swing, hole, course, game, ground, fairway, rough, grass, bunker, sand, trap, match, play, nine, eighteen, peg, mound, drive, driver, iron, condor, albatross, eagle, birdie, lay-up, approach, pitch, chip, holing, bogey, cart, trolley, caddy, caddies, penalty, score, rules, regulations, etiquette, safety, fair, fairness, pace, bounds, shaft, lance, grip, head, wood, hybrid, chip, overlap, interlock, claw, anchor, pendulum, lag, hazard, hook, pull, draw, fade, push, slice, ace, playoff, scratch, tournament, ball marker, carry bag, sunday bag, cart bag, staff bag, stand bag, travel bag, gloves, loft, clubset, wedge, launch, backspin, lie, bounce, player, greenside bunker, waste bunker, muscle back, cavity back, fade, draw, hosel, skin, stableford, foursome, fourball, scramble, champagne, greensome, wolf, tour

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Turkey Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on turkey puns! 🦃 ⛅

While turkeys are seasonally popular due to holiday demand, they’re loved all year round at Punpedia. Whether you’re looking for a specific pun for your Thanksgiving celebrations, attempting to contribute to (or win!) a pun thread, or trying to make some really terrible pick-up lines, we hope this list has what you need.

Note: Punpedia never jokes about killing or hurting animals, and so you won’t find any puns about slaughtering, plucking, debeaking, battery cages, or anything like that. Only happy puns that are friendly to our turkey pals 🙂 Enjoy!

Turkey Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about turkeys that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s the list of turkey puns:

  • Turkey: As in, “Cold turkey,” and “Talk turkey.” Notes: Cold turkey refers to the abrupt and complete quitting of something. To talk turkey is to speak frankly and openly.
  • The Key → Turkey: As in, “Turkey to your heart,” and “Lock him up and throw away turkey,” and “Turkey to a nice, relaxed evening,” and “Turkey to success.”
  • Gobble: Turkeys are known for their signature “gobbling” sound. As gobbling also means to eat quickly and messily, we can make some corny turkey puns out of using these double meanings. Adult male turkeys are also called gobblers, so there are pun possibilities there too.
  • Goblet → Gobble-t: As in, “A wine gobble-t,” and “Crystal gobble-t.”
  • Goblin → Gobblin’: As in, “Gobblin‘ down a vegan feast.”
  • Bird: There are quite a few phrases/idioms related to birds which can be used as puns in the right context: “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush” and “A bird-brain” and “Bird’s eye view” and “A little bird told me …” and “An early bird” and “Early bird gets the worm” and “Like a bird in a gilded cage” and “The birds and the bees” and “Birds of a feather flock together” and “Flip someone the bird” and “Free as a bird” and “The bird has flown” and “Sing like a bird” and “Jailbird“.
  • Fowl: As in, “Neither fish nor fowl.” Note: this refers to something which is not easily categorised.
  • Foul → Fowl: As in “By fair means or fowl” and “Cry fowl” and “Fowl language” and “Fowl up” and “No harm, no fowl” and “A fowl-mouthed person” and “Fowl play”.
  • Fell → Fowl: As in “In one fowl swoop” and “Little strokes fowl great oaks” and “The bottom fowl out of the market” and “She fowl asleep at the wheel” and “He fowl under her spell” and “It fowl into my lap” and “She fowl victim to the scammer”. Note: If something is done in one fell swoop, then it was done quickly and in one single action.
  • Fall → Fowl: As in, “A fowling out,” and “Easy as fowling off a log,” and “Bread always fowls butter side down,” and “Can’t help fowling in love,” and “Catch a fowling star,” and “Fowl about laughing,” and “Fowl between the cracks,” and “Fowl from grace,” and “Fowl into bad habits,” and “A fowlen angel,” and “Oh how the mighty have fowlen,” and “The bigger they are, the harder they fowl,” and “United we stand, divided we fowl.”
  • Vowel → Fowl: As in, “The owl without a fowl.” Note: this is a reference to Bill Mlkvy.
  • *fal* → *fowl*: As in, fowllacy (fallacy), fowlter (falter), fowlse (false), fowllout (fallout), buffowlo (buffalo), crestfowllen (crestfallen), defowlt (default), downfowl (downfall), fowlsetto (falsetto), fowlt (fault), fowlsify (falsify), freefowl (freefall), nightfowl (nightfall), waterfowl (waterfall).
  • Chuck → Chick: As in, “Chick a sickie,” and “Get chicked out,” and “Chick overboard.”
  • Trick → Chick: As in, “Bag of chicks,” and “Every chick in the book,” and “How’s chicks?” and “Never misses a chick,” and “One chick pony,” and “A chick of the light,” and “Chick or treat!” and “Chicks of the trade,” and “Up to your old chicks.”
  • Thick → Chick: As in, “As chick as thieves,” and “Blood is chicker than water,” and “In the chick of things,” and “The plot chickens,” and “Chick and fast,” and “Through chick and thin,” and “Lay it on chick.”
  • Then → Hen: As in, “All that and hen some” and “Now and hen” and “And hen there was one” and “That was hen, this is now” and “Right hen and there” and “But hen again…”
  • Hen: “Don’t let the fox guard the hen-house” and “As scarce as hen’s teeth” and “A mother hen” and “Hen-pecked” and “Hen’s night/party”. Note: to be henpecked is to be bullied or intimidated by a woman.
  • *hen*: Words than contain “hen” can be silly chicken/hen puns: Apprehend, appre-hen-sion, comprehend, comprehension, comprehensive, hence, henceforth, repre-hen-sible, stonehenge.
  • *han* → *hen*: As in, “Give me your hend (hand),” and “Do you have a hendle (handle) on it?” and “You look so hendsome tonight,” and “Your hendwriting has improved,” and “Their kids are a real hendful,” and “She was raised as an orphen,” and “The elephent in the room,” and “Please enhence the image,” and “I’ve had an epipheny!” and “This is your last chence,” and “Change the chennel.”
  • *hin* → *hen*: As in, “You’re hendering (hindering) me,” and “Doorhenge,” and “Give me a hent (hint),” and “In hendsight (hinsight),” and “You’re a hendrance (hindrance),” and “Change comes from withen,” and “Looking a bit then (thin),” and “Take it on the chen (chin),” and “Got kicked in the shens (shins),” and “Contrary to what you may think, dolphens are mammals,” and “A rush of endorphens,” and “A street urchen.” Note: to hinder is to block someone’s progress or to make something difficult to complete.
  • *hon* → *hen*: As in, “Brutally henest (honest),” and “An henourable mention,” and “Hello, heney (honey).”
  • *hun* → *hen*: As in, “A wild hench (hunch),” and “The henter (hunter) becomes the hented (hunted),” and “One hendred,” and “I’m hengry,” and “That’s not what I henger (hunger) for.”
  • Tom: Male turkeys are called “toms”. Make some bad tom puns with these: “Peeping tom,” and “Tom, Dick and Harry,” and “Tom foolery.”
  • *tom*: As in, “Red as a tomato,” and “An old tome,” and “Tomb Raider,” and “As if there were no tomorrow,” and “Custom made,” and “Rock bottom,” and “An atomic flavour,” and “The Phantom Menace,” and “Another symptom of,” and “It takes time to get accustomed,” and “The epitome of grace,” and “Turns my stomach,” and “The customer is not always right.”
  • *tam* → *tom*: As in, tome (tame), tomper (tamper), tomarind (tamarind), tomp (tamp), bantom (bantam), stomp (stamp), testoment (testament), stomina (stamina), metomorphosis (metamorphosis), vitomin (vitamin), stompede (stampede), contomination (contamination). Note: to tamp or tamper something is to press it firmly down so that it becomes compressed. Bantam is a class of weight and is used both in measuring poultry weight and in boxing/mixed martial arts.
  • *tem* → *tom*: As in, tomporal (temporal), tomper (temper), tomperature (temperature), tomperament (temperament), tomplate (template), tomporary (temporary), tompo (tempo), tompest (tempest), systom (system), stom (stem), ecosystom (ecosystem), itom (item), totom (totem), contompt (contempt), and contomplate (contemplate). Notes: temporal means relating to time. A tempest is a storm.
  • *tim* → *tom*: As in, tomeline (timeline), tomid (timid), tomely (timely), tomber (timber), tomeframe (timeframe), toming (timing), verbatom (verbatim), victom (victim), ultomate (ultimate), intomate (intimate), legitomate (legitimate), estomate (estimate), sentoment (sentiment), optomal (optimal), optomistic (optimistic).
  • *tum* → *tom*: As in, tomble (tumble), tomultuous (tumultuous), tomult (tumult), tombler (tumbler), tommy (tummy), tomeric (tumeric), momentom (momentum), quantom (quantum), stomp (stump), and stomble (stumble). Note: if something is tumultuous, then it’s chaotic. Briefly put, quantum refers to the smallest amount of something.
  • Fly: There are a few phrases related to flying which can be used as bird puns in the right context: “Fly by the seat of your pants” and “Fly in the face of the evidence” and “Fly off the shelves” and “A fly on the wall” and “Fly by night” and “On the fly” and “Pigs might fly” and “Let fly” and “Watch the sparks fly” and “Fly in the ointment” and “Fly into a rage” and “Fly off the handle” and “Fly the coop” and “I’ve gotta fly” and “Fly the white flag” and “Wouldn’t hurt a fly
  • Fry → Fly: As in, “Bigger fish to fly,” and “Out of the flying pan, into the fire,” and “Small fly.” Note: to be out of the frying pan and into the fire means to have escaped one situation only to be caught up in a worse one.
  • Flight: “Flight of fancy” and “Take flight” and “Flight of imagination” and “In full flight” and “Flight attendant”.
  • Waddle → Wattle: As in, “Look at that duck’s wattle.” Note: a wattle is the fleshy part on the turkey’s face that hangs down.
  • Snooty → Snood-y: As in, “A snood-y waiter.” Note: a snood is a part of the turkey’s forehead.
  • Feather: There are a few phrases related to feathers: “As light as a feather” and “In full feather” and “Feather in your cap (symbol of honour/achievement)” and “Feather one’s nest” and “Ruffle (a few/someone’s) feathers” and “You could have knocked me down with a feather“.
  • Father → Feather: As in “The founding feathers” and “Like feather, like son”.
  • Further → Feather: As in “Without feather ado” and “Look no feather” and “Kick the can feather down the road”
  • Beard: As in, “His beard was white as snow.” Note: turkeys have beards.
  • Beer → Beard: As in, “Cry into your beard,” and “Everything you always wanted in a beard,” and “Ginger beard,” and “I’m only here for the beard,” and “Life’s not all beard and skittles,” and “The champagne of beards,” and “Hold my beard.”
  • Beak: “To wet one’s beak” and “beak” may be slang for nose in some places.
  • Peek → Beak: As in “Beak-a-boo” and “Sneak beak“.
  • Peak → Beak: As in “Beak performance” and “They climbed to the beak
  • Peck: “The pecking order” and “Peck at (eat only a bit)” and “You have to eat a peck of dirt before you die”. Note: having to eat a peck of dirt before you die means that no-one can escape unpleasant things; everyone will have some kind of unfortunate circumstance to endure during their lifetime.
  • *pec* → *peck*: As in, “Peckuliar circumstances,” and “Peckan pie,” and “Work those pecks (pecs)!” and “Don’t make a specktacle of yourself,” and “A different perspecktive,” and “Treat them with respeckt,” and “Take all aspeckts into account,” and “Sexuality is a specktrum,” and “Prospecktive interests.”
  • *pac* → *peck*: As in, “Good things come in small peckages,” and “A blood peckt,” and “Pay pecket,” and “Positive social impeckt,” and “A compeckt car,” and “Peckyderm (pachyderm).” Note: a pachyderm is a type of animal (elephants are pachyderms).
  • *pic* → *peck*: As in, “The big peckture,” and “Peck up sticks,” and “In a peckle,” and “A peckturesque view,” and “A few sandwiches short of a pecknic (picnic),” and “An epeck movie,” and “I’m a bit myopeck,” and “Stay on topeck,” and “A new biopeck,” and “A philanthropeck mission,” and “Acting conspeckuous,” and “An accurate depecktion,” and “A despeckable villain.” Notes: if someone is myopic, then they’re short-sighted. A biopic is a biographical film. A philanthropic cause is one which aims to promote charity and the welfare of others.
  • *poc* → *peck*: As in, “Pecket-sized,” and “Get outta here with your hypeckrisy (hypocrisy),” and “Apeckalyspe now,” and “You’re being a hypeckrite.”
  • *puc* → *peck*: As in, pecker (pucker), peckered (puckered), and cappeckcino (cappucino).
  • *bac* → *peck*: As in, “Peckground noise,” and “Peckterial (bacterial) infection,” and “Political pecklash,” and “A beautiful peckdrop,” and “The peckchelor (bachelor),” and “In my peckyard,” and “What a depeckle (debacle).”
  • *bec* → *peck*: As in, peckome (become), peckon (beckon), barpeckue (barbecue).
  • *bic* → *peck*: As in, aeropeck (aerobic), arapeck (arabic), cupeckle (cubicle).
  • Pique → Beak: As in, “You’ve beaked my interest.” Note: to pique is to arouse.
  • Wing: “Left wing / right wing” and “Let’s just wing it” and “Take under your wing” and “Clip someone’s wings” and “Spread your wings
  • *wing: Make some turkey puns by emphasising the “wing” in certain words: swing, drawing, following, harrowing, brewing, growing, owing and knowing.
  • Wringer → Winger: As in, “Put through the winger.”
  • Win → Wing: As in, “Can’t wing for losing,” and “Due a wing,” and “Every one a winger,” and “Heads I wing, tails you lose,” and “How to wing friends and influence people,” and “It’s not the winging that counts, it’s the taking part,” and “It’s not whether you wing or lose; it’s how you play the game,” and “Play to wing,” and “Some you wing, some you lose,” and “Winger takes all.”
  • Whinge → Winge: As in, “Having a winge.”
  • Ring → Wing: As in, “Alarm bells began to wing,” and “A dead winger,” and “Doesn’t wing a bell,” and “Don’t wing us, we’ll wing you,” and “In the wing,” and “Wing of fire,” and “Run wings around,” and “Throw your hat into the wing,” and “Give them a wing,” and “My ears are winging,” and “Does that wing any bells?”
  • Tail: As in, “Happy as a dog with two tails,” and “Nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs,” and “Bright eyed and busy tailed,” and “Can’t make head or tail of it,” and “Chase your own tail,” and “Two shakes of a lamb’s tail.” Note: two shakes of a lamb’s tail is a phrase used to indicated that something is very fast.
  • Tale → Tail: As in, “Dead men tell no tails,” and “Fairytail ending,” and “Live to tell the tail,” and “Never tell tails out of school,” and “An old wives’ tail,” and “Tattle tail,” and “Tell tail sign.”
  • Talent → Tailent: As in, “___’s got Tailent,” and “A tailented painter,” and “Where would you say your tailents lie?”
  • Toilet → Tailet: As in, “Down the tailet,” and “In the tailet.”
  • Style → Stail: As in, hairstail, freestail, lifestail, and stailus (stylus)
  • Tile → Tail: As in, fertail (fertile), percerntail (percentile), projectail (projectile), reptail (reptile), and versatail (versatile).
  • Spur: As in, “Spur of the moment.” Note: turkeys have a spur on the back of their feet.
  • *spir* → *spur*: As in, spural (spiral), spurit (spirit), conspuracy (conspiracy), perspuration (perspiration), and inspuration (inspiration).
  • *sper* → *spur*: As in, whispur, aspurions (aspersions), prospur (prosper), despurate (desperate).
  • *bur* → *spur*: As in, hurly-spurly, spurning (burning), spurner (burner),  spuried (buried), spurn (burn), spurst (burst), spury (bury).
  • Fan: As in, “Fan the flames,” and “I’m a big fan,” and “Fan dance,” and “Fancy one’s chances,” and “Flight of fancy,” and “Hit the fan,” and “Tickle one’s fancy,” and “Fancy free,” and “A little of what you fancy does you good,” and “Fancy pants.”
  • Than → Fan: As in, “Bite off more fan you can chew,” and “Blood is thicker fan water,” and “Easier said fan done,” and “More fan meets the eye,” and “You can’t say fairer fan that,” and “Actions speak louder fan words,” and “Better to be safe fan sorry,” and “Two heads are better fan one,” and “Better late fan never,” and “Better to be healthy fan wealthy.”
  • Thanks → Fan-ks: As in, “Accept with fan-ks,” and “Give fan-ks,” and “Fan-k your lucky stars.”
  • Nest: “Leave the nest” and “Empty nest syndrome” and “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” and “Love nest” and “Stir up a hornet’s nest” and “A nest of vipers” and “A mare’s nest” and “Nest together”. Notes: empty nest syndrome is the feeling of loneliness a parent may experience when their children move out for the first time. A mare’s nest is a state of confusion or chaos.
  • Next → Nest: As in “Nest minute …” and “Better luck nest time” and “Boy/girl nest door” and “Nest generation” and “Nest in line to the throne” and “Nest to nothing” and “Take it to the nest level” and “Nest to nothing” and “The nest big thing.” and “Cleanliness is nest to godliness” and “In nest to no time” and “Nest to nothing” and “One day chicken and the nest day feathers” and “Catch the nest wave” and “As ___ as the nest girl/guy”. Note: “One day chicken and the next day feathers” is a phrase indicating that things we consider valuable can be lost in no time at all (like a job, marriage, or a house etc).
  • Clutch: Clutch has two meanings: to hold onto something tightly, and a group of eggs. We can make some egg puns using this: “A drowning person will clutch at a straw,” and “Pearl-clutcher.” Note: a pearl-clutcher is someone who is overly prudish.
  • Claw: As in, “Tooth and claw,” and “Get your claws into.”
  • Chlo* → Claw*: As in clawride (chloride) and clawrine (chlorine).
  • Clo* → Claw*: As in, clawbber (clobber), claw-ck (clock), clawckwise (clockwise), clawg (clog), clawset (closet), clawth (cloth).
  • Flock: “To flock around/to (someone/something)” and “Flock together” and “Birds of a feather flock together”. Note: birds of a feather flock together means that ones with similar tastes or interest tend to congregate together.
  • Flick → Flock: As in, “Chick flock,” and “Give it the flock.” Note: to give something the flick is to get rid of it.
  • Fluke → Flock: As in, “A lucky flock.”
  • Flake → Flock: As in, “Flock out,” and “Flock-y pastry.” Note: to flake out is to not stand up to promises or expectations.
  • Paltry → Poultry: The term “paltry” means “small, insignificant or worthless” and the term “poultry” refers to domesticated chickens (and ducks, geese and other fowl). As in, “A poultry amount of work.” Note: young turkeys are called poults, so any poultry pun should also work with poult.
  • Poetry → Poultry: As in, “Poultry in motion,” and “Spoken word poultry.” Note: spoken word poetry is performative poetry that tends to involve themes of social justice.
  • Poltergeist → Poultrygeist: As in, “Peeves the poultrygeist.” Note: Peeves is a famous poltergeist from the Harry Potter series.
  • Pulled → Poult: As in, “He really poult me along.”
  • Bolt → Poult: As in, “A poult from the blue,” and “Poulted upright,” and “Poulted for the door,” and “Get down to the nuts and poults of it,” and “No point locking the stable door after the horse has poulted.” Notes: a bolt from the blue is a sudden, unexpected event. To lock the stable door after the horse has already bolted is to take precautions after the worst has already happened.
  • Joke → Jake: A jake is a young male turkey, so we can make some terribly turkey puns here. As in, “Beyond a jake,” and “By way of a jake,” and “An inside jake,” and “It’s not a jaking matter,” and “The jake’s on you,” and “A terrible jake,” and “Can’t take a jake.”
  • Click → Cluck: As in “Cluck on that button” and “Her explanation clucked with me straight away”.
  • Clock → Cluck: As in “The cluck is ticking” and “A race against the cluck” and “Around the cluck” and “Biological cluck” and “Turn back the cluck” and “Stop the cluck” and “10 o’cluck“.
  • Egg: There are a few phrases/idioms that contain the word “egg”: “A bad egg” and “Egg on” and “A hard egg to track” and “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket” and “Egg on one’s face” and “A good egg” and “A rotten egg” and “Egg and spoon race”. Note: to have egg on your face means that you’ve been made to look foolish.
  • *eg* → *egg*: If a word contains the “egg” sound then we can make a silly egg pun: dereggulation, beggar, begging, deggradation, eggsistence (existence), eggsit (exit), eggshortation (exhortation), eggsile (exile), eggsistential (existential), impreggnated, irreggularity, irreggular, kegg, legg, begg, meggabyte, leggings, meggawatts, neggatively, neggative, neggligently, nutmegg, peggasus, preggnancies, reggular, reggulation, seggment, unreggulated, preggnant, omegga, seggregated.
  • Agg* → Egg*: As in, eggregate, eggressive, and eggravate.
  • *igg* → *egg*: As in, tregger (trigger), geggle (giggle), peggyback (piggyback), weggle (wiggle).
  • *ugg* → *egg*: As in, streggle (struggle), seggest (suggest), regged (rugged), smeggle (smuggle), sleggish (sluggish), jeggle (juggle), beggy (buggy).
  • Coup → Coop: A “coup” is a sudden, violent, and illegal seizure of power from a government. While it works visually, “coup” is pronounced without the “p” while “coop” is pronounced with.
  • Coop: “Cooped up (confined in a small place)” and “Fly the coop (to escape)”
  • Coupe → Coop: A coupe is a car with a fixed roof and only two doors and is generally shorter than a sedan.
  • *coop*: Words with the “coop” sound are easy chicken coop puns: coopon (coupon), scoop, scooped, recoop (recoup), recooperation (recouperation).
  • Rafter: As in, “Packed to the rafters.”
  • Scoop → S-coop: As in, “Full s-coop,” and “Get the s-coop,” and “Inside s-coop,” and “Poop and s-coop,” and “What a s-coop.”
  • Strut: As in, “Strut your stuff.” Note: strutting is a courtship behaviour for turkeys.
  • Street → Strut: As in, “Easy strut,” and “Mean struts,” and “On the sunny side of the strut,” and “Right up your strut,” and “Strut cred,” and “The struts of London are paved with gold,” and “The word on the strut,” and “A two-way strut,” and “Trust is a two-way strut.”
  • Stretch → Strut-ch: As in, “By any strut-ch of the imagination,” and “Home strut-ch,” and “Strut-ch your legs,” and “Strut-ching the truth.”
  • Strat* → Strut*: As in, strutegy (strategy), strutegic (strategic), strutosphere (stratosphere), strutification (stratification). Notes: the stratosphere is a layer in the Earth’s atmosphere. Stratification is a system of layers or categories.
  • Scratch: As in, “I scratch your back, you scratch mine,” and “Scratch the surface,” and “Start from scratch,” and “Up to scratch,” and “Handwriting like chicken scratch,” and “Scratching your head.” Note: if you’ve got handwriting like chicken scratch, then you’ve got illegible handwriting.
  • Prin* → Preen*: As in, preenciple (principle), preence (prince), preencess (princess), preent (print), preenter (printer), preenciple (principal).
  • *pren* → *preen*: As in, preenatal, preenup, preenuptial, entrepreeneur, appreentice and neopreene.
  • Help → Yelp: As in, “A cry for yelp,” and “Bend over backwards to yelp,” and “Beyond yelp,” and “Can I yelp you?” and “Can’t yelp falling in love,” and “Yelp yourself,” and “A yelping hand,” and “With a little yelp from my friends,” and “Yelp make ends meet.” Note: a yelp is a type of turkey call.
  • Spit: Turkeys are known for spitting, so we can make some bad turkey puns here – as in, “Spit and polish,” and “Spit in the eye of,” and “Dummy spit,” and “Spit take,” and “Spitting image,” and “Spitting with rain,” and “Within spitting distance.” Notes: spit and polish is an extreme attention to cleanliness and appearance. A spit take is where someone spits a drink out of their mouth in reaction to something.
  • Court: As in, “Contempt of court,” and “Courting disaster,” and “Haul before the court,” and “Order in the court,” and “See you in court,” and “The ball is in your court.” Note: court has a few different meanings, including the type of courting that turkeys do to attract each other – which allows us to make use of this for some terrible turkey puns.

Turkey-Related Words

There are many more turkey puns to be made! Here’s a list of turkey-related concepts to help you come up with your own. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

turkey, gobble, hen, tom, gobbler, poult, jake, jenny, flock, rafter bird, egg, poultry, fowl, chick, wattle, snood, caruncle, beard, feather, wing,  tail, fan, beak, spur, plumage, domesticated, wild, pecking order, strut, fly, nest, claw, scratch, preen, cluck, yelp, spit, forage, courting, clutch, eastern wild turkey, osceola, rio grande, merriam’s wild, gould’s wild, south mexican wild

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Crab Puns

Halfway through a pun battle about crabs? Naming your new hermit crab? Or maybe you just want to stock up on some crab puns for future reference. Whatever the case, this Punpedia entry is all about crabs and crustaceans, so you’re in the right place!

You may also like to read the entries on beach punsocean puns, water puns, fish puns, boat puns, shark puns, whale puns and dolphin puns.

Not that this entry also includes lobster puns, prawn puns, and more generally, crustacean puns. If you’re looking for visual crab puns (memes, comics, images), scroll to the bottom of this page.

Crab Puns List

Below is list of puns for crab-related topics with associated example sentences for each. Most of these puns are terrible, which is probably exactly what you’re after, but there are a few diamonds in the rough, so get digging! Oh and some items explain a “pattern” which can be applied to create many crab puns. In these items, the asterisk, “*”, denotes a wild card (one or more letters).

Remember, there’s lobster puns, shellfish puns, and other crab-related puns mixed throughout, so if you’re having a purely crab-based pun battle or something like that, then just know that not all of these will be relevant 🙂

  • Captivating → Crabtivating: As in “That was an incredibly crabtivating speech.”
  • Cab → Crab: As in “I think the crab-driver was drunk.”
  • Cab* → Crab*: If a word starts with “caB” we can make a terrible crab pun of it: crabinet (cabinet), crabbage (cabbage), crabaret (cabaret), crabling (cabling), crable (cable), cabbies (crabbies).
  • Cap* → Crab*: If a word starts with “cap” we can make a terrible crab pun: crabital (capital), crabacity (capacity), crabtain (captain), crabitalism (capitalism), crababilities (capabilities), crabtion (caption), crabuccino (cappuccino), crabpricious (capricious), crabsicum (capsicum).
  • Capable → Crab-apple: As in “I am completely crab-apple of completing this task ma’am.”
  • *cab* → *crab*: If a word contains “cab” we can often make a terrible crab pun: applicrability (applicability), amicrable (amicable), dispicrable (dispicable), replicrable (replicable), scrabbard (scabbard), vocrabulary (vocabulary).
  • Carbohydrates → Crabohydrates: As in “Low-crabohydrate diets are just an unhealthy fad.”
  • Carbon → Crabon: As in “Crabon-fibre is the new chitin.” and “We need more bicrabonate soda.”
  • Cry → Cray: As in “These puns are making me cray.”
  • Clammy: As in “Can we open some windows? It’s a bit clammy in here.”
  • Crave → Crayve: As in “I’m crayving some tofu right now.”
  • Cra* → Cray*: Words that start with the “cray” sound can be crayfish puns: craydle (cradle), crayg (craig), craynial (cranial), crayzy, crayter, crayziness.
  • Crabby: As in “He just woke up, he’s a little crabby.”
  • Crabbed: As in “Sorry, I’m just a little crabbed because my team lost.”
  • Grab → Crab: As in “Can you crab me a glass of water while you’re up please?”
  • Grabbing → Crabbing: As in “I’m just crabbing a drink before we go.”
  • Nap → Nip: As in “If you’re drowsy, have a nip.”
  • Pinch: As in “A pinch of salt will do, thanks.”
  • Law → Claw: As in “We need to abide by the claw.”
  • Clor* → Claw*: If a word begins with the “clor” sound then we can make a silly claw pun: clawstrophobia (claustrophobia), clawdia (claudia), clawophyll (chlorophyll).
  • Decrepit → Decapod: A very laboured pun. A decapod is “a crustacean of the order Decapoda, such as a shrimp, crab, or lobster.” Decrepit means elderly and infirm or “worn out or ruined because of age or neglect”.
  • Shit n’ → Chitin: Chitin is the material which forms the exoskeleton of arthropods (like insects and crustaceans). Example sentence: “Eat chitin die.”
  • Cheatin’ → Chitin’: Chitin is the material which forms the exoskeleton of arthropods (like insects and crustaceans). Example sentence: “That chitin’ bastard stole my money!”
  • Lost her → Lobster: As in “My kid’ll be so angry that I lobster favourite teddy.”
  • Sheila → Chela: “Sheila” is Australian slang for “woman”: “This chela runs the department store down the road.”
  • Hermit: As in “Yes, the old hermit has lived there for years.”
  • Scuttle: As in “I saw her scuttling down the street the other day.”
  • Sure → Shore: As in “Are you shore?” and “She shore is strong!”.
  • Imp* → Shrimp*: If a word starts with “imp”, you can usually replace it with “shrimp”, for example: shrimportant (important), shrimpossible (impossible), shrimply (imply), shrimpose (you get the idea), shrimpose, shrimportshrimpudent, shrimpact, shrimperfect, shrimpaled, shrimpartial, shrimpart. Shrimp puns probably deserve their own entry, but until then you can use this list to help you.
  • Whatever → Waterever: As in “Waterever, I don’t care.” and “Do waterever you want”.
  • What her → Water: As in “I know water problem is.” and “Do you know water mother thinks about this?”.
  • What do → Water: As in “Water you think about this?”
  • What about → Water boat: As in “Water boat we have tofu curry for dinner tonight?” and “Water boat Ching? Does she want to come to the beach too?”
  • What are → Water: “Water you doing out so late tonight?” and “Water you doing tomorrow?”
  • What are we → Watery: As in “Watery going to do?” and “Watery doing today, friends?”
  • Celebration→ Shellebration: As in “After finishing we should have a shellebration.”
  • Roe: “Row” as in “row your boat” and “roe” as in shellfish eggs, are two words that can be inserted into many other words: roetine (routine), roemans (romans), roetation (rotation), roed (rowed), roese (rose), roel (roll), roep, roemantic, roebust, roebot, roegue, roest.
  • Kil* → Krill*: Kill, kilogram, killer, killing, kilowatt are all words that can be punned with “krill”. For example: “I just bought a krillogram of tofu” and “Krilling sentient creatures is often morally wrong”.
  • Pawn/Pwn → Prawn: This pun can be used in the gamer-culture sense: “I got prawned a pro last night”, in the chess sense “He moved his prawn to C4″, and in the pawnbroker sense: “I had to prawn all my stuff to pay for college.”
  • Crea* → Cray*: Many words that begin with “crea” can be used to make shoddy crayfish puns. For example: crayture (creature), craytive (creative), crayte (create).
  • Crayon: The word “crayon” includes “cray” – the short version of “crayfish”, and so can be used as a pun.
  • Brilliant → Krilliant: As in “Isn’t the weather just krilliant today?” Krill are small shrimplike plankton.
  • Brilliant → Brill-iant: “Brill” are a type of European flatfish.
  • Angrily→ Ankrilly: As in “The monster roared ankrilly“.
  • Hungrily→ Hunkrilly: As in “She hunkrilly ate the sweet potato slices”.
  • Selfish → Shellfish: As in “Stop being so shellfish.” See the next item for a generalisation of this pun.
  • Sell → Shell: As in “How many do we have left to shell?” and “Shell your soul to the devil.”
  • Shell: As in “I’m not going to shell out $50 for something I don’t even need!”
  • Sel* → Shell*: If a word starts with “sel” a shell pun can be made by switching it with “shell”. For example: shellection (selection), shellect (select), shelldom (seldom), shellfless (selfless).
  • *sel → *shell: Words ending in “sel” can often be punned upon with “shell”: vesshell (vessel), tasshell (tassel), weashell (weasel), musshell (mussel), etc.
  • *sel* → *shell*: Words containing “sel” can yeild nice puns on “shell”: Hershellf, himshellf, themshellves, itshellf, myshellf, yourshelf, yourshelves, convershelly, counshelling, preshellected, overshelling, undershelling, ushellessely, weashelling.
  • Obs* → Lobs*: If a word begins with “obs” a terrible lobster pun can sometimes be made by switching it with “lobs”, as in observation (lobservation, or even lobstervation), obstruction (lobstruction or even lobsterusction), obscurity (lobscurity), obsolescence (lobseolescence), obsessively (lobsessively).
  • Simmer → Swimmer: As in “I left the pot swimmering and now my vegetable curry is burnt!” and “Hey swimmer down, there’s no need to turn this into a fight”.
  • Sea*: Most words starting with “sea” are easy sea puns: season, seasonal, seated, searingly, sealants, seamseatbelt.
  • See* → Sea*: If a word starts with “see” it can often be replaced with “sea” to create a simple sea pun: seaminly, seads, seaker, seathe, seap, seak, sean, sea (see).
  • Se* → Sea*: Some words that start with just “se” also have a “sea”-ish sound, and the ones that don’t can usually be made into terrible puns anyway: seacret, searious, seargeant, seacretion, seacure, seacurity, seacondary, seacretariat, seaconds, seacrete, searum, searenity, searvitude, seanile, seadation, seaclusion, seacretive, seaze, seaquential, sealection, seacretly, seaquences, seanior, seaniority, seagregate, seaping, seacession, seariousness, seaminars, seaveral, seaxual, seaparation, seantimental, seansational, seaquential, seacluded, seacularist, seathing, seaquin, seasame, seaclusion.
  • Se*cy/Ce*cy → Sea*sea: Most words that start with “se” or “ce” and end with “cy” can be double sea puns: seacresea (secrecy), sealibasea (celibacy).
  • *cy → *sea: If a word ends in “cy” it’s an easy “sea” pun: polisea, agensea, democrasea, currensea, emergensea, efficiensea, tendensea, frequensea, fansea, constituensea, pregnansea, accurasea, redundansea, bureaucrasea, presidensea, legasea, conspirasea, mersea, privasea, bankruptsea, consistensea, literasea, urgensea, deficiensea, dependency, consultansea, tenacity, isea (icy), secrecy, intimasea.
  • Simp* → Shrimp*: Words beginning with “simp” can often be made into shrimp puns by replacing the “simp” with “shrimp”: shrimple (simple), shrimplification, shrimplify, shrimplistically, shrimpleminded, shrimpleton.
  • Shall→ Shell: As in “Shell I compare thee to a summer’s day?” and “He who lives by the sword shell die by the sword.” and “Shell we dance? and “Ask and you shell receive.” and “Seek and you shell find.” and “The truth shell set you free.” and “You shell not pass!”
  • Symb* → Shrimpb*: Replacing the suffix “symb” with “shrimpb” gives some pleasantly jarring shrimp pins: shrimpbolic (symbolic), shrimpbolises (symbolises), shrimpbiosis (symbiosis).
  • Con* → Conch*: A terrible shell pun can be made of almost any word that begins with “con”: conchtrol (control), conchsider (consider), conchtinue (continue), conchdition, conchtract, conchern, conchtain, conchference, conchtext, conchcept, conchtrast, conchfidence, conchtent, conchtribution, conchflict, conchsideration, conchstruction, conchtinued, conchclusion, conchduct, conchversation, conchgress, conchsumer, conchcentrate, conchtribute.
  • *cial → *shell: When a word has “cial” as a suffix, this suffix can usually be swapped out for “shell” to create a shell pun: soshell (social), speshell (special), offishell (official), finanshell, commershell, crushell, judishell, artifishell, provinshell, rashell, benefishell, superfishell, fashell, glashell, sacrifishel, antisoshell.
  • Muscle → Mussel: As in “Yeah, she’s so mussely!” and “Mussels are made up of millions of tiny cells”.
  • Seizure → Seazure: As in “If I read one more ocean pun I’m going to have a seazure.”
  • *bably → *bubbly: As in “I’m probubbly going to stick around for a bit longer” and “It was indescribubbly mysterious” and “All the while he just impertububbly paced along the shore”.
  • *pon → *prawn: Words ending in “pon” can be converted to prawn puns by replacing it with “prawn”: weaprawn (weapon), couprawn (coupon), whereuprawn (whereupon), tamprawn (tampon), thereuprawn (thereupon), uprawn (upon), whereuprawn (whereupon).
  • *able → *abubble: Words ending in “able” can be converted to terrible bubble puns by replacing it with “abubble”: reasonabubble (reasonable), availabubble (available), enabubble (enable), comfortabubble (comfortable), valuabubble (valuable), constabubble (constable), acceptabubble, capabubble, inevitabubble, vegetabubble, suitabubble, variabubble, vulnerabubble, profitabubble, acceptabubble, sylabubble, reliabubble, … Many more shameful puns like this can be made with the help a of list like this one.
  • Clam*: Words that begin with clam can be used as shellfish puns: clamouring, clammy, clamp, clamber, clampdown.
  • Bubbly: “bubbly” has a “this water is bubbly” sense and a “he has a really bubbly personality” sense.
  • *ways → *waves: Words than end in “ways” can be made into bad wave puns: alwaves (always), railwaves (railways), sidewaves, pathwaves, lengthwaves, doorwaves.
  • Title → Tidal: As in “I like it, but I’m not sure on the tidal” and “Use ‘Ms.’ as her tidal” and “The championship tidal match is tomorrow morning.”
  • Acquaintance → Aquaintance: As in “I don’t know her well, she’s just an aquaintance“.
  • Tied → Tide: As in “I’m tide up at the moment, can someone else help?” and “Yep, they tide the knot!”
  • Tidy → Tidey: As in “After the party we need to tidey the beach.”
  • Crazy → Cray-sea: As in “He is so craysea!” and “Enough of this crayseaness!”. Hyphen is, of course, optional.

Got crab puns that we don’t? Please share them in the comments. We’re especially looking for puns for: thorax, invertebrate, arthropod, isopod, branchiopod, swimmeret, copepod, ostracod, exoskeleton, pincer, chela, crustacean and carapace.

Crab-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to crabs can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the crab-themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • Feel the pinch
  • In a pinch
  • Faster than a speeding crawfish
  • Having a little nip
  • Fishing for compliments
  • Penny pincher
  • Serious as cancer
  • Red in tooth and claw
  • He’s in hot water
  • Smells fishy
  • (We need more crab-related phrases, please suggest some in the comments!)

Crab-Related Words

This Punpedia entry certainly isn’t an exhaustive list of all the possible crab puns, so below is a large list of crab-themed words which you can use to invent your own puns. Some of the words below are leaning towards crustacean-related, rather than precisely crab-related, and some of the items in this list are phrases rather than words. Here they are:

king crab, king, dungeness crab, dungeness, lobster, shellfish, fish, shrimp, crustacean, fiddler crab, crab louse, stone crab, crayfish, prawn, seafood, spider crab, shell, exoskeleton, crabmeat, crab meat, crabby, crabby person, pincer, pincers, pinch, claw, jonah crab, grouch, complain, oyster, clam, mussel, abalone, hermit, hermit crab, carapace, scuttle, scurry, scamper, sideways, shell, crabs, crab, shrimps, seafloor, beach, tide pool, oceanside, porcelain crab, horseshoe crab, crab legs, sea animal, nipper, nip, barnacle, copepod, ostracod, krill, jointed limbs, arthropod, chitin, segmented body, segmented limbs, decapoda, decapod, isopod, branchiopod, branchiopoda, underwater, sea, ocean, water, aquatic, spiny lobster, crawfish, invertebrate, swimmeret, lobster tail, thorax, langoustine, crabstick, cancer, hard shell, palm crab, robber, crab, crabbed, crabbing, solder crab, chela, mud crab, crabwise, shed, land crab, rock crab

Crab Jokes

Jokes of the exceedingly cheesy or one-liner variety usually involve some sort of pun. Here’s a list of crab-themed jokes involving word play. Tap or hover on the black rectangles to reveal the answer.

  • What did one tide-pool say to the other tide-pool? – Show me your mussels!
  • Why was the sand wet? – Because the sea weed!
  • How do oysters call their friends? – On shell phones!
  • What is the strongest creature in the sea?  – A mussel!
  • Where do crabs go to borrow money? – The prawn broker!
  • Why don’t oysters share their pearls? – Because they’re shellfish!
  • Why is the sand so quiet? – Because the waves keep going “Shhhh!”
  • Why did the crab need a day off work? – (He pulled a mussel!)
  • Who brings young crabs Christmas presents? – (Santa Claws!)
  • How much salt do crabs like on their food? – (Just a pinch)
  • So, this crab walks into a bar. The bartender says, “You look confused. Are you in the right place?” The crab replies, “Actually, I’m looking for a sand bar. “

Crab Pun Images

Looking for visual crab puns? Below is a collection of crab pun pictures that we’ve managed to find. Have you found or made a good one? Post us the link in a comment at the bottom of the page 🙂

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Whether you were looking for a punny crab caption for your beach photo, a really good crab pun to out-wit your friends in a pun battle or a cute crab pun for your hermit crab’s, we really hope this entry in Punpedia has been helpful to you. If you’ve got any suggestions for puns that we’ve missed, Punpedia entries that you want us to write, or just general suggestions for how Punpedia can be improved, please feel free to leave us a comment below! Thanks for visiting 🙂