Tag: ripe

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on cheese puns! 🧀 🐭

Cheese is an internationally loved food that can be enjoyed on its own, as a base for recipes or simply as a topping or flavouring. Although it’s celebrated for its tasty qualities, we should be aware that there are many dairy-free replacements we can (and should) use instead so as to not support the dairy industry. If you’re concerned about your calcium intake, don’t be – there are many vegan sources of calcium available.

In this list, we’ve tried to cover cheese ingredients, types of cheese, and popular cheese dishes, so we hope to have you covered no matter what you’re after. Wow your tinder date, ruin family games night and win that pun thread with our cheesy cheese puns list!

If you’re after related puns, we also have cow puns, pizza puns, food puns, milk puns and taco puns.

Cheese Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about cheese that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of cheese puns:

• She’s → Cheese: As in, “By george, I think cheese got it!” and “Cheese all that” and “Maybe cheese born with it (Maybelline slogan)” and “Cheese the best.”
• Seize → Cheese: As in, “Cheese them!” and “Cheese the day.”
• Bees → Cheese: As in, “The birds and the cheese” and “Mind your own cheesewax.”
• Geez → Cheese: “Oh cheese, I’m so sorry” and “Cheese Louise!”
• Be → Brie: As in, “Brie my guest” and “Brie mine” and “Not all it’s cracked up to brie” and “Brie done with it” and “I’ll brie around” and “Brie that as it may” and “Brie yourself” and “Brie still my beating heart.” Note: here’s a vegan brie and a vegan brie recipe.)
• We gotta → Ricotta: As in, “Ricotta get going!” Note: here’s a quick vegan ricotta recipe, and a vegan ricotta that you can buy readymade.
• Ease → Cheese: As in, “Cheese up a little” and “Ill at cheese” and “If it will set your mind at cheese.”
• Easy → Cheesy: As in, “Cheesy as ABC” and “Cheesy as pie” and “Cheesy access” and “Cheesy come, cheesy go” and “Cheesy does it” and “Cheesy money” and “Cheesy on the eyes” and “Cheesy street” and “Cheesy peasy” and “Take it cheesy.”
• Eas* → Cheese*: cheesygoing (easygoing), cheesel (easel), Cheeseter (Easter), cheesily (easily), Cheesetern (Eastern) and cheesier (easier).
• Cheers → Cheese: As in, “Cheese to the married couple!” and “Three cheese for…”
• Please → Cheese: As in, “Cheesed as punch” and “However you cheese” and “One moment, cheese” and “Cheese be seated.”
• Trees → Cheese: As in, “Can’t see the wood for the cheese” and “Charm the birds out of the cheese” and “Money doesn’t grow on cheese.”
• Threes → Cheese: As in, “Good things come in cheese.”
• Seas → Cheese: As in, “On the high cheese.”
• Chase → Cheese: As in, “Cheese-ing your own tail” and “Cut to the cheese (this is similar to the phrase “cut the cheese“, meaning to pass gas)” and “The thrill of the cheese” and “A wild goose cheese” and “Cheese-ing after” and “Give cheese.”
• Purchase → Purcheese: As in, “Free gift with purcheese” and “An impulse purcheese” and “Unecessary purcheeses.”
• Choose → Cheese: As in, “A woman’s right to cheese” and “Pick and cheese” and “Cheese your weapon” and “Your mission, if you cheese to accept it” and “You can cheese your friends but not your family.”
• Ches* → Cheese*: If a word starts with “ches”, we can edit it to be “cheese” instead: “That old cheese-tnut” and “Cheeseshire cat grin.”
• *chis* → *cheese*: We can sneak “cheese” into words that have a “cheez” or “chize” sound: “Cheeseled (chiseled) jaw” and “Own your own francheese” and “The disenfrancheesed masses.” Note: if one is disenfranchised, then they do not have the right to vote.
• Chose* → Cheese*: As in, “You’re the one I cheese” and “The cheesen one” and “Many are called, but few are cheesen.”
• *gis* → *cheese*: As in, “Get the cheese’t (gist) of it” and “Recheeseter (register) to vote” and “Locheesetics (logistics) manager” and “New lecheeselation (legislation)” and “Marriage recheesetry (registry)” and “Biased macheesetrate.”
• *jes* → *cheese*: As in, “Cheese-us Christ” and “Cheese-us wept” and “What would Cheese-us do?” and “Your macheesety (majesty)” and “Macheesetic (majestic) views.”
• Permission → Parmesan: As in, “Better to ask forgiveness than parmesan” and “Signed parmesan slip” and “Ask parmesan for” and “Parmesan based marketing.”
• Emojis → Emocheese
• Dare he → Dairy: “How dairy?” Note: Here are some handy facts about the dairy industry.
• Dearly → Dairy: As in, “I love you dairy” and “Dairy beloved…”
• Diary → Dairy: As in, “Bridget Jones’ Dairy” and “Let me consult my dairy” and “Dear dairy…”
• *dary → *dairy: boundairy, legendairy, quandairy, secondairy. Note: a quandary is a difficult problem.
• *dery → *dairy: embroidairy (embroidery), spidairy (spidery), doddairy (doddery), powdairy (powdery).
• Daring → Dairy-ng: As in, “A dairy-ng escape” and “The dairy-ng adventures of…”
• *dari* → *dairy*: As in, “Stand in solidairy-ty” and “Learning Mandairyn” and “Healthy relationship boundairys.”
• *deri* → *dairy*: dairyve (derive), dairyvative (derivative), dairysion (derision) and dairysive (derisive). Note: if something is derivative, then it’s based on something else.
• Past your eyes → Pasteurize: This one is very specific! “Don’t blink! It’ll go pasteurize in a second.”
• Better → Cheddar: As in, “I’ve got a cheddar idea” and “Appeal to your cheddar judgement” and “My cheddar half” and “Cheddar late than never!” and “Cheddar luck next time” and “Cheddar safe than sorry” and “Cheddar than new” and “Change for the cheddar.”
• Shed → Cheddar: As in, “Cheddar light on the matter” and “Cheddar a tear.”
• Chatterbox → Cheddarbox (Note: here’s a vegan cheddar recipe – there are many others a quick google away.)
• Bee → Brie: As in, “Busy as a brie” and “Brie in your bonnet” and “Birds and the bries” and “Float like a butterfly, sting like a brie” and “Make a brieline for” and “Like a brie to a honeypot” and “Flight of the bumblebrie” and “The brie’s knees
• Beautiful → Brie-utiful: As in, “All things bright and brie-utiful” and “Black is brie-utiful” and “The start of a brie-utiful friendship.”
• Breeze → Brie’ze: As in, “Life’s a brie‘ze” and “Shoot the brie‘ze.” Note: to shoot the breeze is to talk idly.
• Disagree → Disabrie: As in, “Agree to disabrie” and “Disabrie with” and “Having a disabriement.”
• R&B → R&Brie: (Note: r&b stands for “rhythm and blues” and is a genre of music.)
• Pea → Brie: As in, “Like two bries in a pod” and “Easy as shelling bries” and “Mashed potatoes and bries.”
• *bra* → *brie*: Swap out “brah” sounds for “brie”: algebrie (algebra), vertebrie (vertebra), candelabrie (candelabra), briece (brace), embriece (embrace), libriery (library), vibrient (vibrant), brieve (brave), brien (brain), abriesive (abrasive) and brienchild (brainchild).
• *bre* → *brie: As in, “Give me a briek” and “A different bried of human” and “Security briech” and “Take a deep brieth” and “Mental briekdown” and “Briethe deeply” and “Technological briekthrough” and “Watch your abbrieviations.”
• *bri* → *brie*: As in, “Briedge over troubled waters” and “Here comes the briede” and “Briedal march” and “Brieghtens my day” and “Brieng your own” and “Brieght and early” and “Brielliant shine” and “Briesk morning walk” and “Peanut briettle” and “Marking rubriec” and “Dust and debries” and “Hybried car.”
• Diabetes → Diabrietes
• *bi* → *brie*: “A phobrie-a of heights” and “Wasabrie flavoured” and “An arbrietrary decision” and “I forbried you!” and “Financial liabrielity.” Other words that could work: dubrieous (dubious), abrielity (ability), accountabrielity (accountability), capabrielity (capability), sustainabrielity (sustainability), vulnerabrielity (vulnerability) and availabrielity (availability).
• *pre* → *brie*: “pre” and “brie” sound quite similar, so it’s easy to swap the two sounds: “All briesent (present) and accounted for” and “What’s the briemise (premise) of the movie?” and “Briejudice (prejudice) is never okay” and “Play brietend (pretend) and make-believe (or brielieve!)” and “A brietentious (pretentious) establishment.” Other words that could work: briesceint (prescient), briedicate (predicate), briemium (briemium), abbrieciate (appreciate) and combriehensive (comprehensive).
• *pri* → *brie*: As in, “Briede and Prejudice” and “Corrupt brienciples (principles)” and “Briencipal players” and “Check your brievilege” and “Brieme time television” and “Name your briece.” Other words that could work: brient (print), approbrieate (appropriate), combriese (comprise), cabriecious (capricious) and enterbriese (enterprise).
• I can’t remember → I camembert (here’s a recipe for dairy-free camembert)
• Illuminati → Hallouminati: (here’s a recipe for dairy-free halloumi)
• Wish → Swiss: As in, “Be careful what you swiss for” and “Be the change you swiss to see” and “Swiss you were here” and “When you swiss upon a star” and “Swissful thinking” and “Swiss me luck.” Note: here’s a dairy-free swiss cheese recipe, and a readymade vegan swiss that you can buy.
• *sis* → *swiss*: As in, “Soul swisster” and “Swisstine chapel” and “Calls for further analyswiss” and “My hypotheswiss states” and “Arch nemeswiss” and “On the baswiss of” and “Theswiss due in two weeks.” Other words you could use: criswiss (crisis), synopswiss (synopsis), antitheswiss (antithesis), conswisstent (consistent) and narcisswisst (narcissist).
• Better → Feta: As in, “I’ve got a feta idea” and “Anything you can do, I can do feta” and “Appeal to your feta judgement” and “Feta by design” and “My feta half” and “Feta late than never” and “Feta luck next time” and “Feta safe than sorry” and “Feta than sex” and “Feta than new” and “Change for the feta.” Note: here’s a plant-based feta recipe, and a readymade dairyfree feta you can buy.
• Fed → Feta: As in, “Feta up to the back teeth” and “Well feta.”
• Federal → Fetarel
• Fat → Feta: As in, “A feta lot of good that did” and “Baby feta” and “Big feta grin” and “Feta chance” and “Not over till the feta lady sings.”
• Fitter → Feta: As in, “A leaner, feta you.”
• Fettucine → Fetacine
• *fat* → *feta*: As in, “Chronic fetague” and “That fetaful (fateful) night” and “An indefetagable (indefatigable) army” and “Feta‘l attraction” and “Fetality! (read in game announcer voice)” and “Long-term infeta-uation (infatuation).” Note: if someone is indefatigable, then they’re relentless and untiring.
• *fet* → *feta*: As in, “Latex fetash” and “Fetad (fetid) surroundings.” Note: if something is fetid, then it smells bad.
• *fit → *feta: As in, “For your benefeta” and “Stylish new outfeta” and “Turn over a profeta” and “Nonprofeta organisation.”
• *phet* → *feta*: profeta (prophet), profeta-ic (prophetic) and amfetamine (amphetamine).
• *fed* → *feta*: fetaora (fedora), fetaration (federation) and confetarate (confederate).
• Blue: Blue cheese is a general type of cheese that has mold added into it, and is popular among cheese enthusiasts. We’ve added some blue-related puns here that could be used as cheese puns in the right context (and here is a recipe for blue cheese):
  • Blow → Blue: As in, “Any way the wind blues” and “Blue a fuse” and “Blue a kiss.”
  • Blew → Blue: “That really blue me away.”
  • Boo → Blue: As in, “Blue hoo” and “Wouldn’t say blue to a ghost.”
• Gotta → Gouda: As in, “Gouda catch ’em all” and “I gouda go!” and “You gouda ask yourself” and “Gouda look out for number one.”
• Good → Gouda: As in, “I’ve a gouda mind to” and “A gouda time was had by all” and “Does you gouda” and “A world of gouda” and “All gouda things must come to an end” and “All in gouda time” and “As gouda as gold” and “As gouda as it gets” and “Gouda as new” and “Gouda as your word” and “As gouda luck would have it” and “Be a gouda sport” and “Deliver the goudas” and “Do a gouda turn” and “Do not go gentle into that gouda night” and “Do you want the gouda news or the bad news?” and “Fight the gouda fight” and “For goudaness sake.”
• Could/Could’a → Gouda: As in, “As fast as their legs gouda carry them” and “Gouda’nt care less” and “Gouda do it in my sleep” and “You gouda helped out” and “If looks gouda kill.” Note: here are a few vegan gouda options.
• Have → Havarti: As in, “As good luck would havarti it” and “Couldn’t havarti said it better” and “You don’t havarti a clue” and “Havarti I got news for you” and “Havarti a bite to eat.” Note: here’s a dairy-free havarti option.
• Rind: Many cheeses are encased in a protective wax rind, so we’ve included rind-related puns and phrases here:
  • Grind → Rind: As in, “Got an axe to rind” and “Bump and rind” and “The daily rind” and “Don’t let the bastards rind you down” and “Rind to a halt” and “Rinding your teeth.”
  • Rend → Rind: As in, “Heart rinding” and “Rinder useless.”
  • Round → Rind: As in, “All year rind” and “They’ll come rind.”
  • Mind → Rind: “Change your rind” and “I’ve a good rind to…” and “A healthy rind in a healthy body” and “A load off your rind” and “A rind is a terrible thing to waste” and “Always on my rind” and “Absent rinded” and “Bear in rind” and “This will blow your rind!” and “Before you make up your rind, open it.”
  • Find → Rind: As in, “Rind it in your heart” and “Rind your footing” and “Rinders keepers” and “Rinding Nemo” and “Seek, and ye shall rind” and “Love will rind a way.”
  • Wind → Rind: “Rind someone up” and “Time to unrind.”
  • Wined and dined → Rind and dined
  • *rend* → *rind*: As in, “Secret rindezvous” and “A stirring rindition of” and “Surrinder your weapons!” Other words that could work: serindipity (serendipity), referindum (referendum) and serindipitous (serendipitous). Note: serendipity is a type of happy accident.
• Paneer: Paneer is a soft Indian cheese. Here are related puns (and here’s a vegan paneer recipe):
  • Pan* → Paneer*: As in, “Flash in the paneer” and “Down the paneer” and “Flat as a paneer-cake” and “Wait for it to paneer out.”
  • Spanner → S’paneer: As in, “Throw a s’paneer in the works.”
  • Veneer → Paneer: “A shiny paneer” and “Dental paneers.” Note: a veneer is a thin, decorative covering.
  • Ear → Paneer: As in, “All paneers” and “Cute as a bug’s paneer” and “Bend your paneer” and “Smiling from paneer to paneer” and “A paneer for music.”
  • Company → Companeer: As in, “Known by the companeer you keep” and “Enjoy your companeer” and “In good companeer” and “Keep companeer with” and “Misery loves companeer” and “Present companeer excepted” and “Two’s companeer, three’s a crowd.”
• Grey → Gruyere: As in, “Fifty Shades of Gruyere” and “A gruyere area” and “Gruyere is the new black” and “Gruyere matter.” Note: here’s a vegan gruyere recipe for you to try.
• Alone → Provalone: As in, “Leave well enough provalone” and “Let provalone” and “You’ll never walk provalone” and “Time provalone will tell.”
• A damn → Edam: As in, “Why should I give edam?” and “Frankly my dear, I don’t give edam.” Note: here’s a vegan edam that you can try.
• Adam → Edam: As in, “Edam’s apple” and “I wouldn’t know them from Edam.”
• Need him → N’edam: As in, “I don’t n’edam – not a guy like that.”
• Freedom → Fr’edam: As in, “A symbol of fr’edam” and “Fr’edam fighter” and “Fr’edam of the press” and “Last taste of fr’edam.”
• Case of → Queso: “In queso emergency…” Note: queso is a type of melted cheese, usually used as a dipping sauce.
• ‘Kay, so → Queso: “Queso, what’s next?” and “Queso, shall we get started?”
• Piece of → Pizza: As in “You want a pizza me?” and “That’s a pizza cake.” and “They all want a pizza the action.” and “That’s a fine pizza ass.” and “That’s a pizza piss.” and “He’s a nasty pizza work.” and “How long is a pizza string?” and “I’ll give him a pizza my mind!” and “You’re a real pizza work.” and “Pizza the pie” and “Abbreviated pizza nothing”
• Piece of my heart → Pizza my hut
• Peace of mind → Pizza mind
• Pete’s sake → Pizzake: As in “For pizzake! Will you two get a room?”
• Beats are → Pizza: As in “I love your music! These pizza so good.”
• Beats a → Pizza: As in “It pizza poke in the eye with a sharp stick.” and “It pizza slow and painful death.”
• Beats around → Pizza-round: As in “He pizza-round the bush and never gets anything accomplished.”
• Not yours → Nachos: As in, “That’s nachos to take” and “Don’t touch! They’re nachos.”
• Not just → Nachos: As in “She’s nachos a pretty face.” and “I’m nachos another one of your minions.”
• Not yourself → Nachoself: As in “Are you feeling all right? You’re nachoself today.”
• Not yo* → Nacho*: As in “It’s nachogurt, it’s sour cream.” and “It’s nachoga, it’s Pilates.”
• Macho → Nacho: As in “Nacho man.”
• Grilled: Since grilled cheese (as in a grilled cheese sandwich) is a very popular meal/snack, we’ve included some related phrases and puns here:
  • Thrilled → Grilled: As in, “Grilled to bits!” and “We’re grilled to have you here.”
  • Bill → Grill: As in, “These are my grillable hours” and “A clean grill of health.”
  • Filled → Grilled: As in, “Grilled with happiness” and “Cream-grilled” and “A smoke-grilled room.”
  • Girl → Grill: As in, “A grill’s best friend” and “The grill next door” and “Grills just wanna have fun” and “Boys and grills.”
  • Gorilla → Grilla: As in “The silverback grilla is native to this area.”
  • Guerrilla → Grilla: As in “The inhabitants used grilla warfare to drive out the enemy.”
• Fondue: As fondue is a very popular cheese dish (one where cheese is mixed with other ingredients and used as a savoury dip), we’ve included fondue-related puns (here’s a list of cheesy fondue recipes for you to try):
  • Fond of → Fondue: “I’m quite fondue you.”
  • Fonder → Fondue: “Absence makes the heart grow fondue.”
  • Fun, do → Fondue: “I’m having fondue you think we can come again?”
• Cream: Cream is related to cheese as both a quality (the creaminess of cheese) and as a type (cream cheese spread), so we’ve got some cream-related puns to double as cheese puns (and here are a couple of vegan cream cheese recipes!):
  • Crime → Cream: As in, “Cream and punishment” and “Cream against nature” and “Cream doesn’t pay” and “A cream of passion” and “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the cream” and “Partners in cream” and “The perfect cream” and “A victimless cream.”
  • Cram → Cream: “Creamed with fresh fruits and berries.”
  • Dream → Cream: As in, “I have a cream” and “Beyond my wildest creams” and “Broken creams” and “Cream on” and “Cream big” and “A cream come true” and “I wouldn’t cream of it” and “In your creams.”
  • *cram* → *cream*: We can swap “cram” sounds for “cream”, like so: “Creamping my style” and “Foot creamp” and “Screambled eggs on toast” and “Holy sacreament.” Note: a sacrament is a sacred act.
  • *crem* → *cream*: creamation (cremation), creamate (cremate), increamental (incremental), increament (increment) and increamentally (incrementally).
  • *crim* → *cream*: As in, “Smooth creaminal” and “Blushing creamson” and “Don’t discreaminate against” and “Racial discreamination.”
• Shredded: Cheese tends to come in either whole blocks or wheels, or shredded in bags. These puns are for the shredded cheese fans:
  • Headed → Shredded: As in, “Which way are you shredded?”
  • Shed → Shred: As in, “Shred light on the matter” and “Shred a tear” and “Shredding your old skin.”
  • Thread → Shred: As in, “Hanging by a shred.”
• Melt: Cheese is known for its creamy, melty qualities, so we’ve got some melt-related puns here for you too:
  • Melt: These phrases are general enough to double as puns in the right context: “In the melting pot” and “Melt into tears” and “Melting my heart.”
  • *met* → *melt*: As in, “Mixed meltaphor” and “Heavy meltal.” Other words that could work: melticulous (meticulous), meltrics (metrics), paramelter (parameter) and geomeltry (geometry).
• Hole: These puns are in reference to the holes (or “eyes”) in swiss cheese:
  • Whole → Hole: As in, “A hole different ballgame” and “Go the hole way” and “Can’t believe I ate the hole thing” and “Let’s just call the hole thing off” and “On the hole” and “The hole is greater than the sum of its parts” and “A hole lotta love” and “The hole nine yards.”
  • Hell → Hole: As in, “All hole broke loose” and “Bat out of hole” and “Burn in hole!” and “Hole on Earth.”
  • *hal* → *hole*: Holeoween (Halloween), marshole (marshal), werewithole (werewithal), lethole (lethal) and patriarchole (patriarchal).
  • Hilarious → Hole-arious
  • *hol* → *hole*: As in, “Happy Hole-idays” and “A hole-istic vision” and “Hole’d my phone” and “A hole-ow (hollow) answer” and “Cup hole-der” and “Beauty is in the eye of the behole-der” and “Blood alcohole limit” and “Methole flavoured.” Other words that could work: Warhole (an in Andy Warhol), threshole‘d, melancholey and psychole-logy.
  • Holy → Holey: As in, “Holey moses” and “Holey cow batman!”
• Mile → Mild: As in, “A thousand milds” and “Go the extra mild” and “Could see you a mild away.” Note: mild is a more common descriptor for a certain (more gentle) type of aroma and flavour of cheese.
• Spice → Slice: As in, “Eleven secret herbs and slices” and “Slice things up” and “Sugar and slice and all things nice” and “Variety is the slice of life.”
• Slice: These slice-related phrases are general enough to use as cheese puns: “Any way you slice it” and “A slice of life” and “Slice of the action” and “No matter how you slice it.”
• Reap → Ripe: As in, “Ripe the rewards” and “Grim riper” and “Ripe what you sow.”
• *rap* → *ripe*: ripeacious (rapacious), ripeture (rapture), ripetor (raptor).
• *rep* → *ripe*: ripe-public (republic), ripeproach (reproach), riperesent (represent), ripeply (reply), riperemind (reprimand), entripepreneur (entrepreneur), discripepancy (discrepancy) and intripepid (intrepid).
• Great → Grate: As in, “A grate day for..” and “All creatures, grate and small” and “Go to grate lengths” and “Grate expectations” and “Grate minds think alike” and “The grate outdoors” and “Having a grate time, wish you were here” and “Set grate store by” and “With grate power comes grate responsibility.”
• Gate → Grate: As in, “Golden Grate bridge” and “Right out the grate” and “Open the floodgrates.”
• Get → Grate: As in, “As good as it grates” and “Buy one, grate one free” and “Can’t grate you out of my head” and “Come and grate it” and “Don’t grate me started” and “Grate a grip” and “Grate a kick out of it” and “Grate back on your feet.”
• *gat* → *grate*: mitigrate (mitigate), aggregrate (aggregate), propagrate (propagate), prerograte-ive (prerogative), delegrate, obligrate-ion (obligation), surrograte. Notes: a prerogative is a right or privilege.
• *grat* → *grate*: As in, “Filled with grate-itude” and “Grate-uitous violence” and “Instant grate-ification” and “Seamless integrate-ion.” Other words you could use: congrate-ulations, integrate-d, conflagrate-ion (conflagration).
• *gret* → *grate*: “I regrate to inform you” and “Regrateably, we write to tell you…” and “Topped with vinaigrate.”
• Integrity → Integratey
• Mould/Mold: Mold (or mould, depending where you are in the world) is what makes blue cheese blue, and so is a part of the cheese-loving community. Here are some moldy old puns for you to play with:
  • Gold → Mold: As in, “A pot of mold” and “After the mold rush” and “As good as mold” and “All that glitters is not mold” and “Fool’s mold” and “Go for mold” and “Mold digger” and “Molden years” and “A molden opportunity” and “A heart of mold” and “Silence is molden” and “Worth your weight in mold.”
  • Mild → Mold: As in, “Mold-mannered” and “To put it moldly…”
  • *mod* → *mold*: As in, “Moldest living quarters” and “Moldern architecture” and “Politically molderate” and “The newest moldel” and “Accommoldate your requests.” Other words that could work: moldify (modify) and commoldity (commodity).
  • Old → Mold: As in, “Tale as mold as time” and “Tough as mold boots” and “For mold time’s sake.”
• Curd: Curds are the parts of milk that coagulates when treated with enzymes to make it sour, and are what cheese is essentially composed of. Here are some terrible curd puns here:
  • Could → Curd: As in, “Fast as his legs curd carry him” and “Curdn’t care less” and “I curd do it in my sleep” and “Curd see you a mile off” and “Curdn’t believe it” and “If looks curd kill” and “It curd be you next” and “Curd never let you go” and “Curd have heard a pin drop” and “Curd have knocked me down with a feather.”
  • Curb → Curd: As in, “Curd your enthusiasm” and “Kicked to the curd.”
  • Card → Curd: As in, “Calling curd” and “Curd up your sleeve” and “Deck of curds” and “Get out of jail free curd” and “Holding all the curds” and “House of curds” and “Lay your curds on the table” and “On the curds” and “Play your curds right.”
  • Cared → Curd: “I knew you really curd.”
  • Cured → Curd: “What can’t be curd must be endured.”
  • *cad* → *curd*: As in, “Acurdemic career” and “All girl’s acurdemy” and “A decurdent spread” and “Throughout the decurds (decades)” and “Avocurdo toast.” Other words that could work: curdaver (cadaver) and curdet (cadet).
  • *cod* → *curd*: Encurd (encode) and curdify (codify).
  • *cud* → *curd*: As in, “Loving curddles” and “Curddly as a puppy” and “Oooh, barracurda (from the song “Barracuda”).
  • *card* → *curd*: curdinal (cardinal), curdboard (cardboard), curdigan (cardigan), curdio (cardio), curdiac (cardiac) and discurd (discard).
  • *cord* → *curd*: As in, “Raspberry curdial” and “You are curdially invited to our wine and cheese tasting” and “Curduroy pants” and “For the recurd” and “Of your own accurd” and “Let’s chat on discurd.” Other words you could use: accurdingly (accordingly), concurdance (concordance) and accurdance (accordance). Note: Discord is a free chat software.
• Baby → Babybel: As in, “And babybel makes three” and “Helpless as a babybel” and “Babybel, please don’t go.” Note: Babybel is a popular Australian brand of snack cheeses.
• String: String cheese is a popular snack (usually used in children’s lunchboxes). Here are some related puns:
  • Bring → String: As in, “String it on” and “String something to light” and “String the house down” and “String to the table” and “String up to date” and “Stringing up the rear” and “Making things that string people closer together.”
  • Ring → String: As in, “Alarm bells begin to string” and “A dead stringer” and “Doesn’t string a bell” and “Don’t string us, we’ll string you” and “String of fire.”
  • Sting → String: As in, “Float like a butterfly, string like a bee.”
  • *sting → *string: As in, “Real estate listring” and “Interestring times” and “Castring call” and “Testring, testring” and “Don’t be disgustring” and “Everlastring love” and “Awarded points for existring” and “Nestring instincts” and “A lastring disagreement” and “Can’t distringuish between the two.”
  • Swing → String: As in, “Come out stringing” and “Get into the string of it” and “In full string” and “String both ways” and “Take a string at” and “The king of string” and “String and a miss.”
  • String: These string-related phrases are general enough to use as puns: “Second string” and “No strings attached” and “Stringing along.”
• Sauce: Cheese sauce is another common way to enjoy cheese, so we’ve got some saucy puns to double as cheese puns in the right context (and here are some vegan cheese sauce recipes):
  • Source → Sauce: “Check your sauces” and “Crowdsauce” and “Go straight to the sauce” and “I refuse to reveal my sauces” and “Renewable resauces” and “Open sauce” and “Sauce material.”
  • *sas* → *sauce*: sauce-shimi (sashimi), Arkansauce (Arkansas), Kansauce (Kansas), disauceter (disaster), assaucein (assasin) and disaucetrous (disastrous).
  • *sis* → *sauce*: As in, “Further analysauce required” and “My hypothesauce states” and “Arch nemesauce” and “On the basauce (basis) of” and “Consaucetent (consistent – this one’s a bit of a stretch) with my findings.” Other words that could work: thesauce (thesis), crisauce (crisis) and synopsauce (synopsis).
  • Isoceles → Isauceles: (note: isoceles means equal sides.)
  • *sus* → *sauce*: saucetain (sustain), saucetainable (sustainable), sauceceptible (susceptible), saucepicious (suspicious), saucepend (suspend), saucetainability (sustainability), saucepense (suspense), saucepension (suspension), saucetenance (sustenance), consensauce (consensus), versauce (versus) and censauce (census).
• Whey: Whey is the liquid that’s left after milk has been curdled and strained in the cheese-making process. We’re getting a bit technical here, but we’ve included whey-related puns and phrases in this list too!
  • Way → Whey: As in, “A funny thing happened on the whey there…” and “All the whey” and “That’s the whey it is” and “Any whey the wind blows” and “Any which whey” and “Born this whey” and “By the whey” and “By whey of explanation” and “Change your wheys” and “Laughing all the whey to the bank” and “Doing it the hard whey” and “Don’t know which whey to look” and “Every step of the whey.”
  • Weigh/t → Whey/t: As in, “Whey anchor” and “Whey-ed in the balance” and “Throw your wheyt around” and “Whey in” and “Wheyt of the world” and “Worth its wheyt in gold.”
  • Waste → Wheyste: As in, “Don’t wheyste your breath” and “Haste makes wheyste” and “Lay wheyste to” and “Toxic wheyste” and “Wheysting away” and “Wheyste not, want no” and “Wheyste of space.”
  • *way → *whey: As in, “Awhey with you” and “Awhey with the fairies” and “A dead giveawhey” and “Explain awhey” and “Get carried awhey” and “Takeawhey food” and “Any takeawheys?” and “Plans underwhey“ and “Do things halfwhey” and “Gatewhey drug” and “It needed it anywhey.”
  • *wai* → *whey*: As in, “An accident wheyting to happen” and “Lie in wheyt” and “Reading and wheyting” and “The wheyt is over” and “Wheyve (waive) your fees” and “Signed wheyver (waiver)” and “Wheyling with grief” and “Thin as a wheyf.” Other words that could work: wheyst (waist), wheyter (waiter) and awheyt (await).
  • Wave → Wheyve: As in, “A life on the ocean wheyves” and “Catch a wheyve” and “Smile and wheyve, boys. Smile and wheyve” and “Heave wheyve” and “Making wheyves” and “On the same wheyvelength.”
  • Whale → Wheyle: As in, “A wheyle of a time” and “Save the wheyles.”
  • Well → Wheyll: As in, “Alive and wheyll” and “All’s wheyll that ends wheyll” and “As wheyll as can be expected” and “Get wheyll soon” and “Just as wheyll” and “You know full wheyll” and “Leave wheyll enough alone” and “Living wheyll is the best revenge” and “Might as wheyll” and “That’s all wheyll and good” and “Wheyll I never!” and “Wheyll fed” and “Wheyll, actually…”
  • We’ll → Whey’ll: As in, “Don’t call us, whey’ll call you” and “Whey’ll never do it that way.”
• Humbly → Crumbly: “We crumbly request that you remove your shoes.” Note: since crumbly is a common cheese descriptor/quality, we’ve added it here.
• Testing → Tasting: As in, “Tasting, tasting, one two three.” and “The next phase of tasting involves…”
• Wasting → Tasting: As in, “Tasting your time” and “Tasting away.”
• Homage → Fromage: “Paying fromage to…” Note: fromage is French for cheese.
• Make → Milk: This one’s a bit of a stretch, but can still work! Since cheese is made of milk, we’ve included a milk pun in here too (and here are some dairy-free milks you can try, along with why you should try going dairy-free): “Absence milks the heart grow fonder” and “Milk up your mind” and “Can’t milk head or tail of it” and “Details milk the difference” and “Enough to milk you sick.”
• Raclette: This is both a type of cheese and a type of cheese dish, so we’ve included it in this list:
  • Regret → Raclette: As in, “My one raclette in life” and “No raclettes.”
  • Racket → Raclette: As in, “Making an awful raclette” and “Money-making raclette.”
• Carefully → Caerphilly: As in, “Pick your battles caerphilly” and “Never let the facts get in the way of a caerphilly thought out bad decision” and “Move slowly and caerphilly.” Note: Caerphilly is a type of crumbly cheese.
• Cow: We’ve got a few cow-related puns in here since cheese is commonly made from cow’s milk (for other cow-related puns, see our cow pun list):
  • Camouflage → Cow-moo-flage: As in “We cow-moo-flaged well amongst the shrubs.” and “Put on your cow-moo gear – we’ll need to be sneaky.”
  • Cowabunga: “Cowabunga, dude!”
  • Chow → Cow: “Cow down.”
  • Coincidence → Cowincidence: As in “This wasn’t a cowincidence.”
  • *cow*: If a word contains the “cow” sound (or anything vaguely similar), it can obviously be turned into a silly cow pun: cowncil (council), cowntenance (countenance), cownteract (counteract), cownterfeit, cownterbalance, cownterpart, cownterproductive, cownt, cowntess, cowntless, cowardice, coward (or cow-herd), accowntability, accowntants, encowntered, knocowt (knockout), encowntering, scowting, unaccowntable, loocowt (lookout), discownted, scowl, miscowculation.
• Goat: Goat’s cheese is another popular type of cheese, so here are a couple of goat-related puns (for more, see our goat pun list):
  • Get → Goat: As in “Couldn’t goat a word in edgewise” and “Better goat moving” and “You’d better goat used to it” and “I can’t goat enough” and “Come and goat it!” and “Just trying to goat by” and “Don’t goat me wrong” and “Don’t goat me started” and “From the goat-go (get-go)” and “Goating mixed signals” and “Goat my foot in the door” and “Goat your knickers in a twist.”
  • Got → Goat: As in “You have goat to be kidding me” and “I haven’t goat all day” and “Cat goat your tongue?” and “Goat it in one!” and “Goat me stumped” and “Goat to get moving” and “Goat to run” and “(Someone) has goat game” and “Something’s goat to give” and “The one that goat away” and “You goat it!” and “You’ve goat another thing coming” and “You’ve goat me there” and “You’ve goat to do what you’ve goat to do.” Note: here’s a recipe for dairy-free goat cheese you can try.
• Wine: As wine and cheese are a popular pairing, we’ve included a couple of wine puns in here:
  • Whine → Wine
  • Wane → Wine: “On the wine.”
  • Wonder → Wine-der: As in, “Works wine-ders” and “Gutless wine-der” and “It’s a wine-derful life” and “No small wine-der” and “Wine-ders never cease.”
• Run it → Rennet: “Did you rennet by them for approval?” Note: rennet is used in the cheese-making industry to curdle milk (which will then form curds to be pressed into cheese). Rennet is a set of enzymes which helps young mammals digest their mother’s mik. We obtain rennet from the stomachs of unweaned calves, which is just one more reason to look at vegan cheese options rather than dairy.
• Case in → Casein: “Casein point.” Note: casein is a protein found in dairy products.

These next few puns are based around the base ingredients for vegan cheese varieties:

• Cashew: Cashew is a very popular base for cheese alternatives as it’s very mild, creamy, and goes well with heaps of other ingredients (here are a couple of cashew cheese recipes to try out):
  • Catch you → Cashew: As in, “Careful, you don’t want them to cashew!” and “I’ll cashew later” and “They’ll cashew out” and “I’m gonna cashew!”
  • Cash you → Cashew: As in, “I’ll cashew in.”
  • Shoes → Cashews: As in, “Goody two cashews” and “Kick off your cashews.”
  • Achoo → Cashew (this one is a bit of a stretch, yes, but can work with enough dedication and acting prowess)
• Soy: The classic old soy cheese, while slightly less exciting than cashew cheese, is still very popular among vegan cheese fans, so we’ve included it here:
  • Say → Soy: As in, “As the soying goes” and “Before you could soy anything” and “Computer soys no” and “Do as I soy, not as I do” and “Does exactly what it soys on the tin” and “Have a soy” and “My final soy” and “I’m hearing what you soy” and “Just soy the word” and “Needless to soy” and “Never soy never” and “Soy a few words” and “Soy goodnight” and “Soy it, don’t spray it” and “Soy what you mean” and “As I was soying” and “If I do soy so myself” and “Soy again?” and “To soy nothing of” and “To soy the least.”
  • So → Soy: As in, “Soy on and soy forth” and “I wouldn’t go soy far as to…” and “How soy?” and “If I do say soy myself” and “Not soy fast!” and “Soy be it” and “Soy long as” and “Soy much for” and “Soy there.”
  • *sey* → *soy*: As in, “An epic odyssoy” and “Hit the bullsoy.”

To finish off, here are some celebrity names changed around to be dangerously cheesy:

• Paris Hilton → Paris Stilton
• Beyonce → Brieonce
• Fetty Wap → Fetta Wap
• Kim Kardashian → Kim Curdashian
• Jane Fonda → Jane Fondue
• Kate Moss → Kate Mozzarella

Note: if you’d like further information about the dairy industry or avoiding dairy in your diet and lifestyle, the documentary Dominion is a great place to start. For further information on other animal industries and support in starting your own vegan lifestyle, Earthling Ed’s videos are a great source of information, as are the vegan and animal rights subreddits. And finally, here’s a great list of delicious vegan cheese recipes that you can enjoy 🙂

Cheese-Related Words

To help you come up with your own cheese puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

cheese, dairy, cheddar, mozzarella, camembert, haloumi, brie, swiss, feta, ricotta, gouda, bocconcini, gruyere, provolone, pecorino, parmesan, havarti, gorgonzola, edam, stilton, cottage, mascarpone, babybel, paneer, queso, nacho, grilled, fondue, cream, string, sauce, shredded, sliced, slice, holes, eyes, cow, goat, sheep, milk, melt, platter, wine, creamy, mild, sharp, hard, soft, aged, crumbly, ripe, blue, tasting, curdle, pasteurised, butterfat, rind, rennet, curds, whey, casein, fat, mold, bacteria, annatto, calcium, mac n cheese, cheese puffs, fromage, buffalo, raclette, limburger, roquefort, caerphilly, cashew, soy, pizza, cheeseboard, grate, grater

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