Chocolate Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on chocolate puns! 🍫 🐰 🍬 ❤

Chocolate is an internationally loved treat that comes in many forms (bar, truffle, sauce, syrup, chips, pastilles), flavours (strawberry, caramel, mint, etc) and types (milk, dark, white and ruby). As well as enjoying it on its own, we use it as a flavouring for biscuits, breads, and other desserts (like ice cream) and in pastries. We even have a couple of holidays where chocolate is a main feature – Easter and Valentine’s day. It’s everywhere! So help spread the love with our list of chocolate puns.

Unfortunately, the dairy industry that chocolate relies on is not so lovable – it’s a system that profits from abuse and and neglect, with the suffering always ending in death. It’s an industry that we don’t need to participate in, are there are plenty of  dairy-free chocolates that we can enjoy instead (and lots of recipes to try!).

In this list, we’ve tried to include chocolate flavours, shapes, types and related words (like “melt”) as well as the more popular chocolate bar names, brands and manufacturers. So no matter what you’re here for – whether it’s a sweet one-liner, saucy hashtag or a bitterly punny comeback, we hope to have you covered here.

If you’re after related puns, we also have milk puns, coffee puns, ice cream puns, cow puns, candy puns, nut puns and cake puns. We’ve also got a Valentine’s Day pun list and an Easter list!

Chocolate Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about chocolate that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of chocolate puns:

  • Chalk → Choc: As in, “Different as choc and cheese” and “Choc it up to experience.”
  • Check → Choc: As in, “Choc it out!” and “Choc your sources” and “Double choc everything” and “Keep in choc” and “Make a list, choc it twice” and “Take a rainchoc” and “Reality choc” and “Choc-ing up on.”
  • Chuck → Choc: As in, “Choc a sickie” and “Choc-ed out” and “Choc overboard.”
  • Silk → Milk: As in, “Smooth as milk” and “Milky smooth.”
  • Make → Milk: As in, “Absence milks the heart grow fonder” and “Milk up your mind” and “Can’t milk head or tail of it” and “Details milk the difference” and “Enough to milk you sick.”
  • Dare he → Dairy: “How dairy?” Note: Here are some handy facts about the dairy industry.
  • Dearly → Dairy: As in, “I love you dairy” and “Dairy beloved…”
  • Diary → Dairy: As in, “Bridget Jones’ Dairy” and “Let me consult my dairy” and “Dear dairy…”
  • *dery → *dairy: We can replace “dery” sounds with “dairy”, like so: embroidairy (embroidery), spidairy (spidery), doddairy (doddery), powdairy (powdery).
  • *dary → *dairy: Swap “dary” sounds for “dairy”: boundairy, legendairy, quandairy, secondairy. Note: a quandary is a difficult problem.
  • Daring → Dairy-ng: As in, “A dairy-ng escape” and “The dairy-ng adventures of…”
  • *dari* → *dairy*: As in, “Stand in solidairy-ty” and “Learning Mandairyn” and “Healthy relationship boundairys.”
  • Bar: The next few puns are in reference to chocolate bars:
    • Are → Bar: As in, “Chances bar” and “Here you bar” and “Bar you joking?” and “How bar you?” and “This is how things bar.”
    • *ber* → *bar*: We can swap “ber” sounds in words for “bar”, (as in chocolate bar): Bareft (bereft), barate (berate), bareave (bereave), barserk (berserk), numbar (number), chambar (chamber), ubar (uber), sobar (sober), ambar (amber), membar (member), timbar (timber) and calibar (caliber).
    • *bor* → *bar*: As in, “Could you please elabarate?” and “A collabarative space” and “Corrobarating stories” and “Paid labar” and “Stubbarn as a mule” and “Subardinate clause.” Note: to corroborate is to confirm with evidence.
    • *bur* → *bar*: Excalibar (excalibur), bargeoning (burgeoning), barrow (burrow), bary (bury), barner (burner).
    • *par* → *bar*: As in, “The current baradigm” and “New Year’s barty” and “Ballbark figure” and “A bart of it.” Other words you could use: baradox (paradox), barse (parse), barallel (parallel), bartisan (partisan), barticular (particular), bartake (partake) and sebarate (separate).
    • *bar*: You can emphasise the “bar” in certain words to make some silly chocolate bar puns: barrel, bargain, barrier, barista, sidebar, embark and barley.
  • Ghandi → Candy: As in “Mahatma Candy was an exceptional human being.”
  • Handy → Candy: As in “This will definitely come in candy.”
  • Can they → Candy: As in “How candy they do this to us?”
  • Uncanny → Uncandy: As in “He had an uncandy feeling that she was being watched.”
  • Can these → Candies: As in “How candies people live like this?” and “Candies desks be shifted over there?” and “Candies drafts – they’re no good.”
  • Sweet: These next few puns are about how chocolate is a sweet and is sweet-tasting (certain varieties, anyway):
    • Suite → Sweet: As in “She was renting a 2-bedroom sweet for the summer.”
    • Sweater → Sweeter: As in “A close-knit woollen sweeter for cold days”
    • Sweat → Sweet: As in “Blood, sweet and tears” and “Beads of sweet rolled down my forehead” and “Break out in a cold sweet” and “By the sweet of my brow” and “Don’t sweet it.” and “Don’t sweet the small stuff.” and “All hot and sweety
    • Sweet: These sweet-related phrases are general enough to be used as puns: As in “You’re so sweet!” and “Oh that’s soo sweet!” and “Revenge is sweet” and “Short and sweet” and “Lay some sweet lines on someone” and “Sweet dreams” and “Sweet Jesus!” and “You bet your sweet life!” and “That was a sweet trick, dude.” and “Sweet as, bro.” and “Whisper sweet nothings” and “Home sweet home” and “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet” and “Sweet smell/taste of success/victory” and “Sweetheart.
    • Switch → Sweet-ch: As in “Bait and sweet-ch” and “Asleep at the sweet-ch” and “Sweet-ch gears” and “You should sweet-ch out your old one with this one.”
    • Switzerland → Sweetzerland: As in “Zürich is a lovely city in Sweetzerland.”
    • Seat → Sweet: As in, “Backsweet driver” and “By the sweet of your pants” and “Hold on to your sweet” and “Not a dry sweet in the house” and “On the edge of my sweet” and “Please be sweeted” and “Take a back sweet” and “The best sweet in the house.”
  • Connection → Confection: As in, “A soulful confection” and “In confection with…”
  • Conviction → Confection: As in “She had a previous confection for a similar offence,” and “She has strong political confections, and she’s not afraid to defend them.” and “She spoke powerfully and with confection.”
  • Confession → Confection: As in “I have a confection to make…” and “Confection is good for the soul,” and “The interrogators soon got a confection out of him.”
  • Shuffle → Truffle: As in, “Truffle off this mortal coil” and “Truffle along.”
  • Trifle → Truffle: As in, “Truffle with someone’s affections.”
  • Trouble → Truffle: As in, “Asking for truffle” and “Bridged over truffled water” and “Double truffle” and “Here comes truffle” and “Looking for truffle” and “Truffle in paradise.”
  • Fun, do → Fondue: “I’m having fondue you think we can come again?”
  • Fond of → Fondue: “I’m quite fondue you.”
  • Fonder → Fondue: “Absence makes the heart grow fondue.”
  • *met* → *melt*: As in, “Mixed meltaphor” and “Heavy meltal.” Other words that could work: melticulous (meticulous), meltrics (metrics), paramelter (parameter) and geomeltry (geometry).
  • Melt: These phrases are general enough to double as puns in the right context: “In the melting pot” and “Melt into tears” and “Melting my heart.”
  • Byte → Bite: As in, “Megabite,” and “Gigabite.”
  • Bright → Bite: As in, “Always look on the bite side of life,” and “All things bite and beautiful,” and “Bite and early,” and “A bite idea,” and “Bite young thing,” and “A bite future.”
  • *bit → *bite: As in, “Exhi-bite,” and “Rab-bite,” and “Ha-bite,” and “Or-bite,” and “Inha-bite.”
  • Bite: These bite-related phrases are general enough to use as puns in the right context: As in, “A bite to eat,” and “Ankle biter,” and “Another one bites the dust,” and “Bite back,” and “Bite me,” and “Bite off more than you can chew,” and “Bite someone’s head off,” and “Bite the bullet,” and “Don’t bite the hand that feeds you,” and “Love bite.”  Notes: an ankle biter is a child, to bite the bullet is to go into a painful yet unavoidable situation, and to bite the hand that feeds you is to show ingratitude to someone you depend on.
  • Does it → Dessert: As in “It’s comfy, but dessert make my bum look big?” and “Dessert not worry you that society cares so much about appearance?”
  • Desert → Dessert: As in “The Sahara dessert.” and “Just desserts.” and “How could you dessert me at the moment I needed you the most?”
  • Dissertation → Dessertation: As in “I wrote my diploma dessertation on candy puns.”
  • Chip: Since chocolate can also come in the form of chocolate chips, we have some chip-related puns here:
    • Cheap → Chip: As in, “All over him like a chip suit” and “Chip as dirt” and “A chip imitation” and “Chip and cheerful” and “A chip date” and “Talk is chip.”
    • Ship → Chip: As in, “Abandon chip!” and “Go down with the chip” and “Loose lips sink chips” and “Run a tight chip” and “Shape up or chip out” and “Chips passing in the night.” Here are some other words that include “ship”: chipment (shipment), chipwreck (shipwreck), relationchip (relationship), worchip (worship), fellowchip (fellowship), leaderchip (leadership), scholarchip (scholarship), friendchip (friendship), flagchip (flagship) and partnerchip (partnership).
    • *hip → *chip: As in, “Chipster cafe.” Other words that could work: chippopotamus and chippocampus (hippocampus). Note: the hippocampus is a part of the brain.
    • Chap* → Chip*: As in, “Chipter and verse” and “Up to chipter five” and “Need a chiperone?”
  • Block: Chocolate commonly comes in blocks (that you can snap into even smaller blocks!) so we’ve got some block-related puns here:
    • Black → Block: As in, “Back to block” and “Block Friday” and “Block as thunder” and “It’s not all block and white” and “Block magic.”
    • Rock → Block: As in, “Hard as a block” and “Solid as a block” and “Between a block and a hard place” and “Don’t block the boat” and “Get your blocks off” and “Hit block bottom” and “I wanna block and roll all night.”
  • Meant → Mint: As in, “We were mint to be together!” and “I didn’t mean that, I mint this” and “What else could you have possibly mint?”
  • *ment* → *mint*: As in, “A studious mintor (mentor)” and “Not worth a mintion” and “Mintal effort” and “A positive mintality” and “Awarded a mintorship” and “Gainful employmint” and “No commint” and “Complemintary colours.” Other words you could use: commitmint (commitment), implemint (implement), environmint (environment), managemint (management), judgemint (judgement), movemint (movement) and judgemintal (judgemental).
  • *mant* → *mint*: As in, “A soothing mintra” and “Up on the mintel” and “Praying mintis” and “A dormint volcano.” Other words that could work: adamint (adamant), claimint (claimant), informint (informant), semintics (semantics), portminteau (portmanteau), romintic (romantic) and dismintle (dismantle).
  • Nuts: Chocolate is frequently nut-flavoured and/or will have some element of nuts in them (like a Snickers bar), so we’ve got some nut-related puns (we also have a full list of nut puns):
    • Not → Nut: As in, “As often as nut” and “Believe it or nut” and “Down, but nut out” and “Nut at all” and “Nut bad” and “Nut in the slightest” and “Nut on your life.”
    • Knot → Nut: As in, “Don’t get your knickers in a nut” and “Tie the nut” and “Tie yourself in nuts.”
    • Nought → Nut: As in, “Nuts and crosses” and “All for nut!”
    • Night → Nut: As in, “Burn the midnut oil” and “Good nut and good luck” and “In the air tonut” and “Morning, noon and nut.”
    • *net* → *nut*: As in, “Social nutwork” and “Nutworking event” and “Fast internut” and “A penutrating glare.” Other words you could use: Other wrods you could use: planut (planet), bonnut (bonnet) and cabinut (cabinut).
    • *nat* → *nut*: As in, “Well, nuturally” and “The nutional anthem” and “Any alternutives?” and “Need your signuture here” and “That resonuted with me.”
  • Fruit → Fruit and nut: As in, “Bear fruit and nuts” and “Forbidden fruit and nuts” and “The fruit and nuts of your labour.”
  • Road → Rocky Road: As in, “Built for the rocky road ahead” and “Get the show on the rocky road” and “Hit the rocky road” and “Keep the show on the rocky road” and “Middle of the rocky road” and “On the rocky road again” and “One for the rocky road.”
  • Smack → Snack: As in, “A snack on the wrist” and “Snack dab in the middle” and “Snacks of..” and “Snackdown.”
  • Snake → Snack: As in, “Snack eyes” and “Snack in the grass” and “Snacks and ladders.”
  • Knack → Snack: As in, “Knick snacks” and “There’s a bit of a snack to it.”
  • Sack → Snack: As in, “Get the snack” and “Hit the snack” and “A sad snack.”
  • Back → Snack: As in, “As soon as my snack is turned” and “Ass snackwards” and “Back in snack” and “Snack to the future” and “Won’t snack down.”
  • Shack → Snack: As in, “Love snack” and “Snack up with.”
  • Slack → Snack: As in, “Cut some snack” and “Take up the snack” and “Snack-jawed.”
  • Dipped: Chocolate is also used as a dipping sauce for fruits (like bananas and strawberries), other candies (like marshmallows), cookies or bread. Here are some dipping-related puns in honour of that:
    • Adept → Adipped: As in, “Adipped at piano playing” and “Not particularly adipped.”
    • Dripping → Dipping: As in, “Plant-based dipping” and “Dipping in gold.”
    • Flipped → Dipped: As in, “Dipped the switch” and “They just dipped out.”
    • *dap* → *dip*: As in, “A dipper suit” and “Adipt to the situation” and “Film adiptation” and “Highly adipped-able (adaptable).
    • *dep* → *dip*: As in, “The Great Dipression” and “Bank diposit” and “Dipartment store” and “Dipendent on” and “In dipth explanation” and “Diplorable behaviour.”
  • Bit → Bitter: As in, “A bitter much” and “A bitter missing” and “A bitter of alright” and “Just a little bitter” and “Bitter on the side.”
  • Battery → Bittery: As in, “Bittery recharge” and “Assault and bittery.”
  • Better → Bitter: As in, “I’ve got a bitter idea” and “Anything you can do, I can do bitter” and “Bitter by design” and “My bitter half” and “Bitter late than never.”
  • *bet → *bitter: As in, “Sing the alphabitter” and “Alphabitter soup” and “Sherbitter flavoured.”
  • *bit → *bitter: Inhibitter (inhibit), gambitter (gambit), exhibitter (exhibit), rabbitter (rabbit), habitter (habit), orbitter (orbit) and prohibitter (prohibit).
  • *bitor → *bitter: Inhibitter (inhibitor), exhibitter (exhibitor) and debitter (debitor).
  • Bitter → Bittersweet: As in, “A bittersweet pill to swallow” and “The bittersweet end” and “Sugarcoat a bittersweet pill” abd “Bittersweet medicine.”
  • Sweet → Bittersweet: As in, “America’s bittersweet-heart” and “Bittersweet as pie” and “Home, bittersweet home” and “How bittersweet to be loved by you” and “Parting is such bittersweet sorrow.”
  • *co → *cocoa: As in, “A messy fiasco-coa” and “Alfresco-coa dining” and “Tobacco-coa industry.”
  • Bean → Cocoa bean: As in, “Cocoa bean counter” and “Cool cocoa beans” and “Full of cocoa beans” and “Magic cocoa beans” and “Spill the cocoa beans.”
  • Butter → Cocoa butter: As in, “Bread always falls cocoa butter side down” and “Bread and cocoa butter” and “Cocoa butter fingers” and “Cocoa butter up” and “Cocoa butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth.”
  • Cow → Cacow: As in, “Don’t have a cacao, man” and “Holy cacao” and “Sacred cacao.”
  • Veg → Fudge: As in, “Fudge out” and “Eat your fudgetables.”
  • Budge* → Fudge*: As in, “Quarterly fudget” and “Out of our fudget” and “Won’t fudge.”
  • *fug* → *fudge*: As in, “Taking refudge” and “An escaped fudge-itive.
  • Easter: Since Easter is a holiday that is largely dependent on chocolate, we’ve got some Easter-related puns here that could double as chocolate puns in the right context:
    • Easier → Easter: As in, “Easter said than done” and “Making a tough job easter.”
    • Aster* → Easter*: Easterisk (asterisk) and easteroid (asteroid).
    • *ister → *easter: As in, “Don’t forget to regeaster” and “Admineaster the medication” and “A sineaster environment” and “Mineaster for health.”
    • Ast* → Easter*: Easteringent (astringent), Easteronomy (astronomy), Easterology (astrology) and Easteronaut (astronaut).
    • *est → *easter: As in, “Evil manifeaster” and “Out of intereaster” and “Deep in the foreaster” and “What do you suggeaster?” and “A modeaster proposal.”
  • Egg: Since chocolate eggs are a wildly popular (especially through Easter) treat, we’ve included egg-related puns here (we also have a full list of egg puns):
    • Beg → Egg: As in, “Egg a favour” and “Egg the question” and “I egg to differ” and “Egg, borrow or steal” and “I egg your pardon?” and “Sit up and egg.”
    • *ig* → *egg*: We can swap “ig” sounds for “egg” sounds, as in, “Keep on degging (digging)” and “Eggnorance is not bliss” and “You can’t eggnore it forever” and “Choosing to remain eggnorant” and “Eggnite your passion.”
    • *ec* → *egg*: As in, “New teggnology” and “Change the subjeggt” and “Be objeggtive” and “High seggurity” and “An effeggtive technique” and “Solar egglipse.” Other words you could use: seggular (secular), feggless (feckless), egglectic (eclectic), eggonomy (economy), eggo (echo), eggology (ecology) and eggstatic (ecstatic).
    • *eg* → *egg*: We can sneak the word “egg” into words that have similar sounds, like so: “Get a legg on” and “Neggative results” and “Had you pegged as…” and “I begg to differ” and “Where do I beggin?” Other words that could work: leggacy, eggocentric, nutmegg, bootlegg, dregg and integgrity.
  • Must → Mousse-t: As in, “All things mousse-t pass” and “All good things mousse-t come to an end” and “Everything mousse-t go!” and “Into every life a little rain mousse-t fall” and “A mousse-t have” and “The shoe mousse-t go on” and “What can’t be cured mousse-t be endured” and “What goes up mousse-t come down” and “You mousse-t be joking!” and “I mousse-t say…”
  • Most → Mousse-t: As in, “Mousse-t wanted” and “Make the mousse-t of it” and “The mousse-t trusted name in news” and “For the mousse-t part.”
  • Mass → Mousse: As in, “Body mousse index” and “Mousse hysteria” and “Weapons of mousse destruction” and “Consuming mousse quantities.”
  • Mouse → Mousse: As in, “Quiet as a mousse” and “A cat and mousse game.”
  • Moose → Mousse
  • For plenty of other mousse puns, see our cake pun list.
  • It’s a wrap → It’s syrup (this one is very specific and refers to chocolate syrup.)
  • Nib: Nibs are cocoa beans that have been roasted and then cracked into smaller pieces. Here are some related puns:
    • *nab* → *nib*: Amenible (amenable), untenible (untenable), sustainible (sustainable), reasonible (reasonable) and sustainibility (sustainability).
    • Inebriated → Inibriated
    • Nobility → Nibility
    • Anybody → Anibody
  • Sweet → Semisweet: As in, “Ain’t she semisweet?” and “America’s semisweetheart” and “Semisweet as a nut” and “Childhood semisweetheart” and “Home semisweet home” and “Revenge is semisweet” and “Short and semisweet” and “Semisweet dreams.” Note: semisweet is a category or type of chocolate.
  • Dark: These next few puns are about dark chocolate (and here’s a dark chocolate recipe to try!):
    • Duck → Dark: As in, “Dark the question” and “Darking and diving” and “Lord love a dark.”
    • Dakota → Darkota
    • *dec* → *dark*: As in, “Suffering a darkline (decline)” and “Royal darkree (decree)” and “Darkadent dessert” and “Dust and darkay” and “Follow social darkorum.”
    • *dic → *dark: Sporadark (sporadic), orthopedark (orthopedic), medark (medic), nomadark (nomadic), periodark (periodic), acidark (acidic), episodark (episodic), darktionary (dictionary), predarkament (predicament), indarkate (indicate), vindarkate (vindicate) and dedarkate (dedicate).
    • *doc* → *dark*: As in, “Is there a darktor in the building?” and “Political darktrine” and “A black and white darkument” and “Dominion is an important darkumentary.” Other words that could work: darkumentation (documentation) and edarkation (education).
  • White: These next few puns are in reference to white chocolate (and here’s a tasty looking white chocolate recipe to try):
    • What → White: As in, “And white not” and “Do white comes naturally” and “For white it’s worth” and “Guess white?” and “White’s going on here then?” and “I’ll have white she’s having” and “It’s not white you think” and “White a feeling” and “So white?” and “White are friends for?” and “White a wonderful world” and “White becomes of the broken-hearted?” and “White can’t be cured must be endured.”
    • Write → White: As in, “Nothing to white home about” and “A white off.”
    • Right → White: As in, “A move in the white direction” and “A woman’s white to choose” and “All the white moves” and “Animal whites” and “White as rain” and “Bang to whites” and “Barge white in” and “Bragging whites.”
    • Rite → White: As in, “Last whites” and “White of passage.”
    • *what* → *white*: Whitever (whatever), whitesoever (whatsoever), whitenot (whatnot) and somewhite (somewhat).
  • You be → Ruby: “Will ruby using this space?” and “Will ruby going to the shops later?” Ruby chocolate is a new type of chocolate that was released late 2017.
  • Almond: Almonds can be added to chocolate and chocolate can be made from almond milk, so we’ve got a few almond puns here:
    • *ommend* → *almond*: As in, “I highly recalmond (recommend)” and “Your work is calmondable.”
    • Amend* → Almond*: As in, “The 13th almondment is a lie” and “You’ll have to almond that document” and “They’re almonding it now.”
  • Aren’t you → Orange you: As in “Orange you glad to see me?” Note: this is a reference to orange flavoured chocolates.
  • Straw → Strawberry: As in, “The last strawberry” and “Clutching at strawberries.” (note: this is a reference to strawberry flavoured chocolates, or chocolate-dipped strawberries. )
  • Paste: Chocolate paste is used as a spread and a filling and is very popular, so we’ve got some paste- related puns here (and here’s a chocolate paste recipe!):
    • Past → Paste: As in, “Blast from the paste” and “Wouldn’t put it paste them” and “I’m paste caring” and “Paste its sell-by date” and “The distant paste” and “Ghost from your paste” and “Quarter paste four.”
    • Post → Paste: As in, “I’ll keep you pasted” and “Pipped at the paste” and “Paster boy.” Note: to be pipped at the post is to be overcome at the final moment or by a very small gap.
    • *past* → *paste*: As in, “A paste-oral scene” and “Flaky pastery” and “Out in the paste-ure.” Other words that could work: paste-or (pastor), paste-a (pasta) and paste-l (pastel).
    • *pest* → *paste*: As in, “Famine and paste-ilence” and “Stop paste-ering me!” and “Toxic paste-icide.” Other words that could work: tempaste (tempest), deepaste (deepest), cheapaste (cheapest) and tapaste-try (tapestry).
    • *pist* → *paste*: Philanthropaste (philanthropist), therapaste (therapist) and escapaste (escapist)
    • *post* → *paste*: As in, “For pasterity (posterity)” and “Pastepone a date” and “Hunched paste-ure (posture)” and “A pastehumous award.” Other words that could work: pasterior (posterior), compaste (compost), outpaste (outpost), signpaste (signpost), lamppaste (lamppost), goalpaste (goalpost) and prepasterous (preposterous).
  • Fondant: Fondant is a type of sugar dough that’s used as icing or decoration for desserts and is commonly either found in small chocolates or are chocolate flavoured. These puns are specific to fondant:
    • *ondent → *fondant: As in, “Feeling desfondant (despondent)” and “News corresfondant (correspondent).”
    • Fun → Fondant: As in, “All fondant and games until someone loses and eye” and “A bundle of fondant” and “Double the pleasure, double the fondant” and “Girls just want to have fondant” and “Good, clean fondant” and “Make fondant of” and “Time flies when you’re having fondant.”
  • Baking: Baking chocolate is a type of unsweetened chocolate that is made and used specifically for cooking. Here are some relevant puns:
    • Aching → Baking: As in, “My baking head” and “My heart is baking.”
    • Breaking → Baking: “Baking and entering” and “Baking news” and “You’re baking my heart” and “Ground-baking” and “Heart-baking.”
  • Cream: Chocolate can be filled with cream or used as a flavouring for cream, so we’ve included a few cream-related puns:
    • Crime → Cream: As in, “Cream and punishment” and “Cream against nature” and “Cream doesn’t pay” and “A cream of passion” and “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the cream” and “Partners in cream” and “The perfect cream” and “A victimless cream.”
    • Dream → Cream: As in, “I have a cream” and “Beyond my wildest creams” and “Broken creams” and “Cream on” and “Cream big” and “A cream come true” and “I wouldn’t cream of it” and “In your creams.”
    • *crim* → *cream*: As in, “Smooth creaminal” and “Blushing creamson” and “Don’t discreaminate against” and “Racial discreamination.”
    • *crem* → *cream*: creamation (cremation), creamate (cremate), increamental (incremental), increament (increment) and increamentally (incrementally).
  • Tamper → Temper: As in, “Tempering with evidence” and “Bad temper.” Note: to temper chocolate is to increase the shine and durability of it by heat treating it.

This section is dedicated to the different brands, names and manufacturers of chocolate:

  • Twix: Twix is a chocolate consisting of a biscuit base topped with caramel and then covered in chocolate sold in the UK, US and Australia. Here are related puns (and here’s a recipe for your own homemade Twix bars):
    • Tricks → Twix: As in, “Bag of twix” and “Dirty twix” and “That does the twix” and “Every twix in the book” and “How’s twix?” and “Never misses a twix” and “One twix pony” and “A twix of the light” and “Twix or treat” and “Twix of the trade” and “Up to your old twix” and “Teaching an old dog new twix.”
    • Ticks → Twix: As in, “Twix all the right boxes.”
    • Pixel → Twixel: As in, “Twixel perfect.”
  • Reese’s: This is a peanut butter and chocolate treat produced by Hershey. Here are related puns (and here’s a tasty-looking recipe for you to make your own peanut butter cups at home):
    • *res* → *reese*: As in, “Reese-search assistant” and “Steely reese‘olve” and “Give reese‘pects to” and “Hand in your reese‘ume” and “Reese‘ume your activities” and “A diplomatic reese‘ponse” and “Reese’ist arrest” and “At rees‘t.” Other words that could work: reese‘ilient (resilient), reese’olution (resolution), reese’cind (rescind), reese‘ilience (resilience), intereese‘t (interest), preese‘nt (present).
    • *ris* → *reese*: As in, “Social awareness is one the reese (rise)” and “Is it worth the reese’k?” and “Reese’que (risque) photos” and “Mushroom reese‘otto.” Other words that could work: hubreese (hubris), ireese (iris), debreese (debris), clitoreese (clitoris), Pareese (Paris), areese (arise) and heureesetic (heuristic). Note: hubris is pride or arrogance and a heuristic is an approach to solving a problem.
    • *rac* → *reese*: As in, “Stinking of reese’ism (racism)” and “Reese’ing heartbeat” and “Reese’y lingerie.”
    • *rec* → *reese*: As in, “Digital reese‘iept (receipt)” and “Break for reese‘ess” and “Gratefully reese‘ieved” and “Your contribution is appreese’iated.”
    • Capricious → Capreese‘ious: (note: if someone is capricious, they are impulsive and unpredictable)
    • *reas* → *reese*: As in, “Give me a good reese‘on” and “I can’t reese‘onably doubt that” and “Within a reese‘onable timeframe” and “Increese‘ing chances.” Other words that could work: pancreese (pancreas), creese (crease), treese‘on (treason), greese (grease), decreese (decrease).
  • Sneakers → Snickers (Note: Snickers bars are a popular chocolate that has peanuts and nougat in it. Here is an incredible looking Snickers recipe for you to try.)
  • Bury → Cadbury: As in, “Cadbury the hatchet” and “Cadbury your head in the sand” and “Cadbury yourself in work.” Note: Cadbury is a British confectionary best known for their chocolates (like Freddo Frogs and Caramello Koalas)
  • Mars: Mars bars are chocolate bars with a nougat base that’s topped with a caramel layer then coated in chocolate. Here are related puns (and here’s a Mars bar recipe for you to try):
    • Bars → Mars: As in, “Behind mars.”
    • *mas* → *mars*: As in, “Lord and marster” and “Behind a marsk” and “Ship’s marst” and “Marssive misunderstanding.”
    • *mas* → *mars*: As in, “Booked a marssage” and “Marsquerade ball” and “Night before Christmars” and “Fuzzy pyjamars.”
    • *maz* → *mars*: As in, “Amarsing job!” and “Ordered from Amarson.”
    • *mis* → *mars*: As in, “Optimars your life” and “Customars your purchase.” Other words that could work: epitomars (epitomise), optimarsation (optimisation), minimars (minimise), maximars (maximise) and atomars (atomise).
    • *mus* → *mars*: As in, “All marscle” and “As much as you can marster” and “Magic marshrooms” and “If you marst.” Other words that could work: marstard (mustard), marslin (muslin) and marseum (museum).
  • Bounty: This is bar of coconut covered in milk or dark chocolate, depending on the variety. Related puns abounty (abound. And here’s a Bounty recipe for you to have a go at):
  • Bound → Bounty: As in, “By leaps and bountys” and “Duty bounty” and “Honour bounty” and “Muscle bounty.” Note: Bounty is a bar of coconut covered in milk or dark chocolate, depending on the variety (here’s a Bounty recipe for you to have a go at)
  • Kitkat: Kitkats are a chocolate-covered wafer bar manufactured by Nestle that are available in different varieties (milk, dark, white, green tea. And here’s a Kitkat recipe you might like).
    • Kit → Kitkat: As in, “Get your kitkat off” and “Kitkat and caboodle” and “A serious bit of kitkat.” Note: to have “the whole kit and caboodle” is to have everything.
    • Cat → Kitkat: As in, “Kitkat on a hot tin roof” and “Kitkat got your tongue?” and “Kitkats have nine lives” and “A kitkat in hell’s chance” and “Cool kitkat” and “Curiousity killed the kitkat” and “Let the kitkat out of the bag.”
    • Kettle → Kitkattle: As in, “The pot calling the kitkattle black” and “A different kitkattle of fish” and “Put the kitkattle on.”
    • *cat* → *kitkat*: As in, “Nice kitkatch (catch)!” and “Not in this kitkategory” and “Kitkater to you” and “A major kitkatastrophe.”
  • Lindt: Lindt is a Swiss chocolate company best known for their chocolate truffles. Here are some lindt-related jokes for you to use:
    • *lit* → *lindt*: As in, “In the lindterature” and “Yes, lindterally” and “A lindtany of problems” and “Kitty lindter” and “A lindteral translation of” and “Lindtigation issues” and “Splindt both ways” and “A sunlindt room.” Other words that could work: moonlindt (moonlit), twilindt (twilit), facilindtate (facilitate), facilindty (facility), qualindty (quality), humilindty (humility), liabilindty (liability), polindtics (politics), realindty (reality) and accountabilindty (accountability).
    • *lant* → *lindt*: As in, “Petulindt tone” and “Remain vigilindt” and “A gallindt horse” and “Surgical implindt.” Other words that could work: transplindt (transplant), assailindt (assailant), philindthropy (philanthropy), nonchalindt (nonchalant) and lindtern (lantern).
    • *lent* → *lindt*: As in, “Malevolindt actions” and “Ambivalindt feelings.” Other words that could work: benevolindt (benevolent), prevalindt (prevalent), equivalindt (equivalent), talindt (talent), excellindt (excellent) and insolindt (insolent).
    • *lunt* → *lindt*: Volindteer (volunteer), volindtary (voluntary), involindtary (involuntary), volindtarily (voluntarily) and volindteering (volunteering).
  • Rolo: Rolos are small cylindrical chocolates with a caramel centre. We’ve got some rolo-related puns here (and a rolo recipe that you might enjoy):
    • Roll → Rolo: As in, “I wanna rock and rolo all night” and “Let the good times rolo” and “On a rolo” and “Ready to rolo” and “Rolo off the tongue” and “Rolo out the red carpet” and “Rolo up your sleeves” and “Rolo with the punches” and “Stop, drop and rolo.”
    • Roller → Rolo: As in, “Emotional rolo coaster” and “High rolo.”
    • Role → Rolo: As in, “A starring rolo” and “What’s your rolo in the company?”
    • *ral → *rolo: As in, “In generolo” and “Integrolo to the team” and “A viscerolo reaction.” Other words that could work: naturolo (natural), ephemerolo (ephemeral), morolo (moral), collaterolo (collateral), liberolo (liberal), peripherolo (peripheral) and temporolo (temporal). Notes: if something is visceral, then it’s to do with internal organs, or a bodily response. Ephemeral means to last for only a short while.
    • *rel → *rolo: Squirrolo (squirrel), barrolo (barrel), apparolo (apparel), quarrolo (quarrel), laurolo (laurel), scoundrolo (scoundrel) and mongrolo (mongrel).
    • *rol* → *rolo*: As in, “Losing controlo” and “On patrolo” and “Enrolo in your course” and “Christmas carolos” and “Low cholesterolo” and “Low on petrolo.”
    • *rela* → *rolo*: As in, “My rolotives are visiting” and “In rolotion to” and “A rocky rolotionship” and “Highly rolotable” and “Rolotively common” and “In corrolotion with” and “That doesn’t corrolote.”
    • *roll* → *rolo*: Trolo (troll), drolo (droll), strolo, enrolo, scrolo, payrolo, bankrolo and steamrolo. Note: if something is droll then it’s funny.
    • *role → *rolo: As in, “Up for parolo” and “The whole rigmarolo” and “Eggplant casserolo.” Note: a rigmarole is an unnecessarily complex procedure.
  • Picnic: Picnics are chocolate bars that consist of nougat, caramel, biscuit, puffed rice and peanuts covered in milk chocolate. Here are some related puns for you (and a picnic recipe you might like to try):
    • Pick → Picnic: As in, “I’ve got a bone to picnic with you” and “Cherry picnic” and “Easy picnic-ings” and “Hand picnic-ed” and “Picnic a card, any card” and “Picnic a fight” and “Picnic and choose” and “Picnic holes in” and “Picnic me up” and “Picnic of the bunch” and “Picnic off one by one.”
    • Picnic: These picnic-related phrases are general enough to work as chocolate puns in the right context: “A few sandwiches short of a picnic” and “It’s no picnic.”
    • *pic → *picnic: As in, “An epicnic tale” and “That’s off-topicnic” and “Philanthropicnic gestures.” A couple of other words that could work: myopicnic (myopic) and misanthropicnic (misanthropic)
    • Nic* → Pic-nic*: Pic-nickel (nickel), pic-nickname (nickname), pic-nickelback and pic-nickleodeon.
  • Haigh’s: Haigh’s is an Australian chocolate company, so we’ve included some related puns:
    • Hey → Haigh: As in, “Heigh big spender” and “Haigh good lookin'” and “Haigh presto!”
    • Hay → Haigh: As in, “Go haighwire” and “Like looking for a needle in a haighstack” and “Make haigh while the sun shines” and “Roll in the haigh.”
    • High → Haigh: As in, “Ain’t no mountain haigh enough” and “An all-time haigh” and “Haigh as a kite” and “Come hell or haigh water” and “Flying haigh” and “Get off your haigh horse” and “Haigh and dry” and “Haigh and mighty” and “Haigh five” and “Haigh maintenance” and “Haigh minded” and “It’s haigh time that…” and “Hold your head up haigh” and “Searching haigh and low.”
  • Nestle: Nestle is a food and drink company that manufactures popular chocolates like Milky Bars, Kitkats and Smarties, so we’ve included some related puns here:
    • Nest → Nestle: As in, “A nestle of vipers” and “Empty nestle syndrome” and “Feather your nestle” and “Leave the nestle” and “Love nestle” and “Nestle egg” and “Stir up a hornet’s nestle.”
    • *nest → *nestle: As in, “In earnestle (earnest)” and “To be completely honestle” and “A dishonestle salesperson” and “Bring me your finestle orange juice” and “The soonestle flight.”
  • Crunchie: Crunchies are a bar of honeycomb toffee coated in milk chocolate. Here are some related puns (and a Crunchie recipe for you to enjoy!):
    • Crunch → Crunchie: As in, “Crunchie time” and “Number crunchie” and “When it comes to the crunchie.”
    • Munchie → Crunchie: As in, “The midnight crunchies.”
    • Scrunch → Crunchie: As in, “Crunchie up your face in agony.”
  • Aero: Aero is a chocolate made by Nestle that has a bubbly, airy texture. Here are some related puns:
    • *aro* → *aero*: As in, “They’re not aeround anymore” and “Aerouse your interest” and “A tantalising aeroma.” Other words that could work: aerose (arose), aeromatic (aromatic), aeromatherapy (aromatherapy), aeromantic (aromantic), paerody (parody) and caerousel (carousel).
    • *ero* → *aero*: “Land aerosion” and “Aerotic show” and “Aeroded trust” and “Aerogenous zones” and “Don’t be a haero (hero).” Other words that could work: zaero (zero), onaerous (onerous), prepostaerous (preposterous), genaerous (generous), daerogatory (derogatory) and treachaerous (treacherous).
  • Kisses: Hershey’s kisses are small, bite-sized chocolates in a teardrop shape. We’ve got some related puns for you here (and a Kisses recipe too!):
    • Kisses: These kiss-related phrases are general enough to use as puns: “Air kisses” and “French kisses” and “Kisses of life” and “Save your kisses for me” and “Hugs and kisses.”
    • *cus → *kiss/es: As in, “Don’t lose fokiss (focus)” and “Lokiss of control (locus)” and “Filled with mukiss (mucus).” Other words you could use: caukiss (caucus), cirkiss/es (circus/es), abakiss (abacus), hibiskiss (hibiscus), hokiss (hocus).
  • Dove: This is known as a Galaxy bar in the UK, Ireland and India and is made by Mars. Here are related puns for you to play with:
    • Love → Dove: As in, “Addicted to dove” and “All you need it dove” and “All’s fair in dove and war” and “I dove her” and “Brotherly dove” and “Can you feel the dove tonight?” and “Crazy in dove” and “Fall in dove” and “For dove or money” and “Hungry for dove.”
    • Dive → Dove: As in, “Deep dove” and “Crash dove” and “Take a dove” and “Dove right in.”
    • Dave → Dove
    • *dav* → *dove*: Affidove-it (affidavit) and cadover (cadaver). Note: an affidavit is a signed document that contains a sworn statement.
    • *dev* → *dove*: As in, “In dovelopment” and “The best we’ve doveloped” and “The dove-il is in the details” and “A dove-iation from the norm.” Other words you could use are: dovelop (develop), dove-ise (devise), dove-oid (devoid), dove-olve (devolve), dove-ious (devious) and dove-iate (deviate).
    • *div* → *dove*: As in, “A doverse society” and “Value in doversity” and “To forgive is dove-ine” and “Controversial issues causing dove-ision” and “Up to each indove-idual.”
  • Joy → Almond Joy: As in, “Beside myself with almond joys” and “A bundle of almond joy” and “Almond joys to the world” and “Jump for almond joy” and “Pride and almond joy.” Note: Almond Joys are a bar similar to the Bounty bar – a little slab of coconut topped with two almonds and covered in milk chocolate. Here’s a recipe for you to make your own Almond Joys at home.
  • Boost: This is a round, milk chocolate bar that’s filled with caramel and biscuit. Here are related puns:
    • Best → Boost: As in, “All the boost” and “Your boost record” and “Be the boost you can be” and “Boost friend” and “Boost in class” and “Do your level boost” and “Doing what we do boost.”
    • Boost: These boost-related phrases are general enough to use as puns in the right context: “Booster shot” and “Ego boost” and “Give me a boost.”
    • Bust → Boost: As in, “Boost a move” and “Boost someone’s ass” and “Gone boost” and “Hustle and boostle.”
    • *bast* → *boost*: boostion (bastion), boostard (bastard), booste (baste), bomboostic (bombastic) and alabooster (alabaster).
    • Bestow → Boostow
    • Boston → Booston
    • *bust* → *boost*: As in, “A roboost relationship” and “Blockbooster sellout.” Other words that could work: comboost (combust) and comboostion (combustion).
  • Cherry Ripe: Cherry ripes are thin bars of cherry and coconut coated in dark chocolate. Here are some related puns to play with (and a recipe to try!):
    • Cherry → Cherry Ripe: As in, “A second bite of the cherry ripe” and “The cherry ripe on the cake” and “Life is just a bowl of cherry ripes” and “The cherry ripe on top.”
  • Chomp: Chomp bars are a mix of wafer and caramel that’s then coated in milk chocolate. We have a few chomp-related puns here for you:
    • Jump → Chomp: As in, “Bungee chomp“and “Get the chomp on” and “Hop, skip and chomp” and “Go chomp in a lake” and “Chomp at the chance” and “Don’t chomp down my throat” and “Chomp for joy” and “Chomp in with both feet” and “Chomp out of your skin” and “Chomp the gun” and “One chomp ahead of” and “Take a running chomp.”
    • Champ → Chomp: As in, “Chomp at the bit” and “The people’s chomp” and “The reigning chomp.”
    • Chump → Chomp: As in, “Chomp change” and “Like a chomp.”
    • Champ* → Chomp*: As in, “Reigning chompion” and “Expensive chompagne” and “In for the chompionship.”
    • *comp* → *chomp*: As in, “Two’s chompany, three’s a crowd” and “Chomplementing colours” and “Catcalling is not a chompliment” and “Chomplex issues” and “Learn to chompromise” and “Chompound problems.” Other words that could work: chomprehensive (comprehensive), chomprise (comprise), chomputer (computer) and chomplicit (complicit).
  • Daim: Daim bars are a Swedish candy with almond and caramel covered in milk chocolate. Here are some Daim-related puns for you to play with (and a recipe to try):
    • Damn → Daim: As in, “Daim straight” and “Daimed if you do, daimed if you don’t” and “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a daim” and “I’ll be daimed” and “One daim thing after another” and “Daim by association” and “Pretty daim quick.”
    • Them → Daim: As in, “Don’t encourage daim” and “How do you like daim apples?” and “I call daim as I see em” and “Let daim eat cake” and “Seen one, seen daim all” and “Us versus daim” and “You can’t win daim all.”
    • Dim → Daim: As in, “A daim view” and “Daim bulb” and “The daim and distant past.”
    • *dam* → *daim*: As in, “What’s the daimage?” and “Daimp, dark cave” and “Pay for the daimages” and “Daimpen their spirits”and “Fundaimental principles.” Other words that could work: adaimant (adamant), Amsterdaim (Amsterdam), Adaim (Adam), madaim (madam) and daimask (damask). Note: damask is a type of silk.
    • *dem* → *daim*: As in, “In daimand” and “The villain’s daimise” and “Sullen daimeanour” and “Let me daimonstrate.” Other words that could work: daimocracy (democracy), daimentia (dementia), daimographic (demographic), tandaim (tandem), diadaim (diadem) and condaimn (condemn).
    • *dim* → *daim*: “A whole new daimension” and “Daiminish your joy” and “Two daimensional” and “A daiminuitive person.” Other words you could try: impedaiment (impediment), rudaimentary (rudimentary), embodaiment (embodiment) and condaiment (condiment).
    • *dom* → *daim*: As in, “Not your daimain” and “Daimestic chores” and “Daiminion is an important documentary” and “Daiminant personalities” and “Falling like daiminoes.” Other words you could use: daiminance (dominance), wisdaim (wisdom), freedaim (freedom), randaim (random), kingdaim (kingdom), seldaim (seldom), boredaim (boredom) and condaim (condom).
  • Dream: Dream is a white chocolate bar manufactured by Cadbury. Here are some silly Dream-related puns you can use (and a recipe for white chocolate you can try):
    • Deem → Dream: As in, “Do you dream it sufficient?” and “Redream yourself.”
    • Team → Dream: As in, “Dream player” and “Take one for the dream” and “Dream spirit” and “Together we make a great dream.”
    • Cream → Dream: As in, “Dream always rises to the top” and “Dream of the crop” and “Dream puff” and “Dreamy, smooth, refreshing” and “Skin like peaches and dream.”
    • Seams → Dream: As in, “Bulging at the dreams” and “Bursting at the dreams” and “Fall apart at the dreams.”
    • Stream → Dream: As in, “Fresh as a mountain dream” and “Fast internet dreaming.”
    • *dem* → *dream*: As in, “List of dreamands” and “Met their dreamise” and “A sullen dreameanour” and “Onset of dreamentia” and “Let me dreamonstrate” and “Know your dreamographic.”
    • *dram* → *dream*: As in, “Being dreamatic” and “Dreamatically announced” and “Filled with melodreama.”
  • Flake: Flakes are a chocolate bar made of thinly folded and layered milk chocolate. We’ve included some related puns here for you:
    • Fake → Flake: As in, “Flake it till you make it” and “Flake friends” and “Flake branded goods.”
    • Fleck → Flake: As in, “A flake of dust” and “Small flakes of gold.”
    • *flec* → *flake*: As in, “Flaked with gold” and “Vocal inflake-tion” and “An honest reflake-tion” and “Deflake-t an argument” and “Reflake-tive of your actions.”
    • *flic* → *flake*: As in, “Global conflake-t” and “Mental afflake-tion” and “Inflake-t pain” and “Feeling conflake-ted.”
  • More → Moro: As in, “Bite off moro than you can chew” and “Come back for moro” and “Dare for moro” and “A few dollars moro” and “Couldn’t agree moro” and “Less is moro” and “One moro thing” and “Moro or less.” Note: A Moro bar is a caramel and nougat layered chocolate bar.
  • Writer → Ritter: As in, “Paperback ritter” and “Ritter’s cramp.” Note: Ritter Sport is a brand of chocolate.
  • S’mores: A s’more is a snack consisting of layers of graham cracker, chocolate and marshmallow and is typically heated slightly until the chocolate and marshmallow are melted slightly before eating. Hershey’s has a s’mores flavoured candy bar, so we’ve got s’more puns here for you to enjoy (and a recipe you might like):
    • More → S’more: As in, “Bite off s’more than you can chew” and “Come back for s’more” and “Dare for s’more” and “One s’more time” and “For a few dollars s’more” and “Couldn’t agree s’more” and “One s’more thing” and “Less is s’more” and “S’more money than sense.”
    • Score → S’more: As in, “Know the s’more” and “S’more a goal” and “A s’more to settle.”
    • Some more → S’more: “Would you like s’more?”
    • Mor* → S’more*: As in, “A s’more-ose expression” and “Paying the s’more-gage” and “Brick and s’moretar store” and “Stop, you s’more-on (moron).” Other words that could work: s’more-al (moral), s’more-phology (morphology), s’more-bid (morbid), s’more-ale (morale), s’more-over (moreover) and s’moreso (moreso).
  • Time → Time out: As in, “One more time out” and “A brief history of time out” and “A good time out was had by all” and “At time outs like this…” Note: a Time Out is a chocolate bar made by Cadbury.
  • Top Deck: Top Decks are a type of chocolate bar made of a milk chocolate base and white chocolate tops. Here are some related puns (and a top deck-related recipe for you to try):
    • Top → Top Deck: As in, “Blow your top deck” and “Come out on top deck” and “Cream always rises to the top deck” and “From top deck to toe” and “Go over the top deck.”
    • Deck → Top Deck: As in, “All hands on top deck” and “Clear the top decks” and “A top deck of cards” and “Hit the top deck.”
  • Smart → Smarties: As in, “Smartie thinking” and “Smartie enough” and “One smartie cookie” and “Quick smartie” and “Smartie arse” and “Street smartie” and “Smartie casual.”

Note: if you’d like further information about the dairy industry or avoiding dairy in your diet and lifestyle, the documentary Dominion is a great place to start. For further information on other animal industries and support in starting your own vegan lifestyle, Earthling Ed’s videos are a great source of information, as are the vegan and animal rights subreddits. Vegan chocolate options are also just a quick google away (and you’ll find lots of “accidentally” vegan chocolate in any grocery store). There are also dairy-free alternatives to some of the most common/popular chocolate bars.

Chocolate-Related Words

To help you come up with your own chocolate puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

general: chocolate, choc, milk, dark, white, ruby, bar, dairy, candy, sweet, confectionary, family bar, belgium, bite, hot chocolate, chips, block, egg, truffle, couverture, fondue, mousse, syrup, fudge, mint, hazelnut, almond, coffee, orange, strawberry, caramel, peanut butter, nuts, ganache, praline, fruit and nut, rocky road, cocoa, cocoa bean, cocoa butter, cacao, nibs, semisweet, bitter, bittersweet, raw chocolate, compound, modeling, paste, fondant, easter, chocolatier, dipped, melt, valentine, dessert, fair trade, organic, snack, baking, cream, brownie, brown, theobroma, temper, tempering/tempered

names: twix, snickers, mars, bounty, milky way, kitkat, rolo, picnic, toblerone, guylian, lindt, cadbury, ferrero rocher, reese’s, haigh’s, koko black, nestle, crunchie, aero, hershey’s, m&m’s, crunch, malteser, kisses, dove, freddo frog, caramello koala, kinder surprise, almond joy, baby ruth, boost, cherry ripe, chokito, chomp, curly wurly, daim, dream, flake, kinder bueno, lindor, milky bar, moro, ritter, smores, tim tam, time out, top deck, twirl, wonka bar, smarties

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Pirate Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on pirate puns! 🏴 ☠ ⛵ 🌊

Pirates today are known as mischievous, swashbuckling characters – cheeky, rule-breaking treasure hunters. But their historical roots are much darker than that, with murder, theft, torture and disease all a common part of a pirate’s lifestyle. We’ve tried to cover all of the different, varied aspects of piracy in this list, from their lingo to their weaponry to famous fictional pirates. So no matter what you’re a fan of or what you’re looking for – whether it be some puns for Talk Like A Pirate Day, or to add some seafaring capers to your Halloween celebrations, we hope that you find the perfect pirate pun.

While this list is as thorough as possible, it is specifically about pirates. If you’re interested in related articles, have a look at our ocean puns, beer puns, boat puns and shark puns.

Pirate Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about pirates that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s our list of pirate puns:

  • Pie → Pie-rate: As in, “Apple pie-rate,” and “Easy as pie-rate,” and “Sweet as pie-rate,” and “Eat humble pie-rate,” and “A piece of the pie-rate,” and “Sweetie pie-rate.” 
  • Corporate → Cor-pirate: As in, “The cor-pirate ladder.” 
  • Irate → P-irate: As in, “This show makes me so p-irate!” 
  • Practical → Piratical: As in, “Piratical walking shoes,” and “A piratical character,” and “Bring some piratical hiking clothes.” Note: if someone is piratical, it means they commit acts of piracy.
  • *pira* → *pirate*: As in, “Res-pirate-ory,” and “Ins-pirate-ional,” and “Res-pirate-ion,” and “As-pirate,” and “Ins-pirate-ion,” and “Cons-pirate-cy.” 
  • Arr*: Emphasise words that have an “arr” sound in them to make some salty pirate puns: “We’ve arrr-ived,” and “A b-arrr-el of laughs,” and “C-arrry on,” and “No holds b-arrr-ed,” and “Arr-ogant,” and “Arrr-ay,” and “Arrrr-est,” and “Arrr-ange,” and “Biz-arrre.”
  • Are → Arrr: As in, “All bets arrr off,” and “Arrr you deaf?” and “Here you arrr,” and “How arrr you?” and “My lips arrr sealed,” and “What arrr the odds?” and “My hands arrr tied,” and “Two heads arrr better than one.”
  • *ore* → *arr*: As in, “Age befarr beauty,” and “Befarr it was cool,” and “Befarr your time,” and “Bite off marr than you can chew,” and “Marr money than god,” and “Marr than meets the eye.”
  • *or* → *arrr*: As in, “Apples and arrranges,” and “This arrr that?”
  • Air → Arrr: As in, “Breath of fresh arrr,” and “Clear the arrr,” and “Dancing on arrr,” and “Arrr guitar,” and “Melt into thin arrr,” and “Out of thin arrr,” and “Spring is in the arrr,” and “Arrrbnb.”
  • R → Arrr: As in, “Arrr2D2,” and “ArrrnB.”
  • Aye: As in, “Aye aye, sir,” and “The ayes have it.” Note: “the ayes have it” is a confirmation that majority of a group have voted in the affirmative. 
  • Eye → Aye: As in, “A wandering aye,” and “All fun and games until someone loses and aye,” and “An aye for an aye,” and “Avert one’s ayes,” and “Beauty is in the aye of the beholder,” and “Bedroom ayes,” and “Before your very ayes,” and “Bright ayes,” and “Aye to aye,” and “A fresh pair of ayes,” and “In the twinkling of an aye,” and “Ayes bigger than your stomach,” and “All ayes.” Note: a wandering eye is when someone is attracted to people other than their current romantic, monogamous partner. 
  • I → Aye: As in, “What can aye say?” and “Aye can help,” and “Aye think so.” 
  • Buy → B-aye: As in, “B-aye now, pay later,” and “B-aye and sell,” and “B-aye into,” and “B-aye some time,” and “Money can’t b-aye you love,” and “The best that money can b-aye,” and “Would you b-aye a used car from this man?”
  • By → B-aye: As in, “B-aye a landslide,” and “B-aye all accounts,” and “B-aye any means,” and “B-aye any stretch of the imagination,” and “B-aye hook or b-aye crook,” and “B-aye my own hand,” and “Cheaper b-aye the dozen,” and “Do b-aye halves,” and “Fall b-aye the wayside,” and “Lead b-aye the nose.” To do something by halves is to not put very much enthusiasm or energy into it. 
  • Bye → B-aye: As in, “Kiss goodb-aye to,” and “Can never say goodb-aye.”
  • I’ll → Aye’ll: As in, “Aye’ll say,” and “Well aye’ll be damned,” and “Ask me no questions, aye’ll tell you no lies,” and “Aye’ll be back,” and “You scratch my back and aye’ll scratch yours.”
  • Eye* → Aye*: As in, “Ayeball,” and “Ayebrow,” and “Ayesore,” and “Ayelash,” and “Bulls-aye.” Note: an eyesore is an unpleasant sight.
  • Ah* → Aye*: Words with an “ah” sound can be changed to “aye” – aye-balaone (abalone), aye-bbreviate (abbreviate), aye-bility (ability), aye-ble (able), aye-bnormal (abnormal), aye-bsolutely (absolutely), aye-ccommodation (accommodation), aye-dmire (admire), aye-mless (aimless), aye-lternative (alternative).
  • Ale → Aye’l: As in, “No more cakes and aye’l?”
  • Ahoy: As in, “Ahoy there,” and “Land ahoy.”
  • Mate → Matey: As in, “Billy no mateys,” and “Matey’s rates,” and “Seeking a soul matey.” Note: Billy no mates is a mocking term for someone with no friends. 
  • Might → Mate: As in, “Cheer up, it mate never happen,” and “Mate as well,” and “Pigs mate fly,” and “The pen is mate-ier than the sword,” and “Mate as well quit.” Note: “the pen is mightier than the sword” means that the media is more powerful than the military. 
  • Meet → Mate: As in, “Fancy mate-ing you here!” and “Make ends mate,” and “Mate and greet,” and “Mate in the middle,” and “More than mates the eye,” and “Please to mate you,” and “Mate your match.”
  • *mate*: Emphasise the “mate” in certain words – material, maternal, ultimate, intimate, consummate, legitimate, estimate, penultimate, decimate, approximate, climate, amateur, animate, automate, checkmate, classmate, cremate, playmate, primate, roommate, stalemate, teammate. Notes: consummate means perfect, or complete in every way. Penultimate means second last. To decimate something is to destroy or devastate it. 
  • *mat*: We can change words that have the “mate” sound to visually include it as well: Mate-riarch (matriarch), mate-rix (matrix), mate-ron (matron) and tomate-o (tomato). Notes: a matriarch is a woman who acts as the head of a group. A matrix is a set of conditions or boundaries in which a thing develops. 
  • I’ve asked → Avast: As in, “Avast her to marry me.”
  • My heart → Me hearty: As in, “A man after me own hearty,” and “Absence makes me hearty grow fonder,” and “Break me hearty,” and “Cross me hearty and hope to die,” and “Don’t go breaking me hearty,” and “Home is where me hearty is,” and “In me hearty of hearts,” and “Set me hearty on.” Notes: To speak of your heart of hearts is to reveal your innermost thoughts. 
  • There → Thar: As in, “Ahoy thar!” and “Are we thar yet?” and “As if thar were no tomorrow,” and “Be thar in spirit,” and “Be thar or be square,” and “Been thar, done that,” and “Don’t go thar,” and “Hang in thar,” and “Here and thar,” and “Here thar be beasts,” and “Here, thar, and everywhere,” and “Hold it right thar!” and “Let thar be light,” and “The truth is out thar,” and “Thar’s no place like home,” and “Thar’s no time like the present.”
  • Their → Thar: As in, “Children and thar toys,” and “Swept of thar feet,” and “Everybody and thar brother,” and “Forgive your enemies – but don’t forget thar names,” and “They learned thar lesson.”
  • They’re → Thar: As in, “Thar blowing in the wind,” and “Thar not okay.”
  • *yo → *yo ho ho: As in, “Tokyo-ho ho,” and “Embryo-ho ho,” and “Mayo-ho ho,” and “Yo yo-ho ho.”
  • Rum: As in, “Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum,” and “Where’s the rum?” 
  • *rum*: Emphasise the “rum” sound in certain words: “Fo-rum,”, “Inst-rum-ent,”, “St-rum,” and “Rum-ble,”, “Rum-inate,”, “Rum-p,”, “Rum-mage,”, “Spect-rum,”, “D-rum,”, “Deco-rum,”, “Tant-rum,”, “Sc-rum,”, “Se-rum,”, “Conund-rum.” 
  • Drum and bass → Rum and bass (Note: drum and bass is a music genre)
  • Boot → Booty: As in, “Tough as old bootys,” and “Bet your bootys,” and “Booty camp,” and “Give someone the booty,” and “Big bootys to fill,” and “My heart sank into my bootys,” and “I got the booty.” 
  • Booty: As in, “Shake your booty.” 
  • Beauty → Booty: As in, “Booty sleep,” and “Make booty-ful music,” and “Booty is in the eye of the beholder,” and “Booty is only skin-deep.” 
  • *boo → *booty: As in, “Tabooty,” and “Bambooty,” and “Peekabooty.” 
  • Treasure: As in, “Hidden treasure,” and “One man’s trash is another man’s treasure,” and “Treasure chest,”, “Treasure trove,” and “Buried treasure.” 
  • Land → Landlubber: As in, “The landlubber of the free,” and “The landlubber that time forgot,” and “The law of the landlubber,” and “The length and breadth of the landlubber,” and “This landlubber is your landlubber,” and “Far into the bowels of the landlubber,” and “See how the landlubber lies.” Notes: the land that time forgot is a fantasy film. The law of the land refers to all laws within a country or region. To see how the land lies is to determine as many facts as you can about a situation before making a decision or action. 
  • Encourage → Anchorage: As in “Stop anchoraging him!”.
  • Pieces → Pieces of eight: As in, “Dash to pieces of eight,” and “Bits and pieces of eight.” Notes: pieces of eight were large silver coins and is a famous pirate treasure due to its value. 
  • Double → Doubloon: As in, “Doubloon back,” and “Doubloon booked,” and “Doubloon over,” and “A doubloon-edged sword,” and “A doubloon date,” and “A doubloon whammy.” Note: a double-edged sword is something that could provide both benefits and disadvantages. 
  • Lot → Loot: As in, “A loot of fuss about nothing,” and “A loot on your plate,” and “Leaves a loot to be desired,” and “Not a loot.” 
  • *loot*: Make some swashbuckling pirate puns by emphasising the “loot” sound in certain words: “Solootion,” and “Resolootion,” and “Revolootion,” and “Evolootion,” and “Abso-loot,” and “Convolooted,” and “Floot (flute),” and “Di-loot (dilute),” and “Plooto,” and “Pollootant,” and “Saloot (salute).”
  • Late → Loot: As in, “Better loot than never,” and “Catch you loot-er,” and “Read any good books loot-ely?” and “It’s never too loot to learn,” and “A loot bloomer,” and “It’s loot in the day,” and “See you loot-er, alligator.” 
  • Let → Loot: As in, “Loot it be,” and “Loot it bleed,” and “Friends don’t loot friends drive drunk,” and “I won’t loot you down,” and “Loot nature take its course,” and “Loot off steam,” and “Loot your conscience be your guide,” and “Loot your hair down,” and “I never want to loot you go.” 
  • *let → *loot: As in, “A shrinking vio-loot,” and “Run the gaunt-loot,” and “A magic bul-loot,” and “Ske-loot-ons in the closet,” and “Bite the bul-loot.” 
  • Bound → Bounty: As in, “By leaps and bounties,” and “Homeward bounty,” and “On the rebounty,” and “Out of bounty.” 
  • Chest: As in, “Get it off your chest,” and “Hold your cards close to your chest,” and “That old chestnut,” and “Treasure chest.”
  • Chased → Chest: As in, “I chest after him.”
  • Grog: As in, “Where’s the grog?” and “I’m feeling groggy.” Note: Grog is a name for an alcoholic drink made of rum and water. 
  • God → Grog: As in, “An act of grog,” and “All things are possible with grog,” and “A child of grog,” and “For the love of grog,” and “Grog fearing,” and “A man of grog.” 
  • Hook: As in, “By  hook or by crook,” and “Get hooked on,” and “Hook, line and sinker,” and “Hook up with,” and “I’m hooked,” and “Let off the hook.” Notes: “By hook or by crook” means by any means necessary. To fall for something hook, line and sinker means you’ve accepted an idea or explanation entirely without critically examining what you’ve been told.
  • Peg → Pegleg: As in, “Square pegleg in a round hole,” and “Take down a pegleg or two.” Note: a square peg in a round hole describes something that doesn’t fit into its environment – the odd one out.  
  • Leg → Pegleg: As in, “Fast as his peglegs could carry him,” and “Break a pegleg,” and “Cost an arm and a pegleg,” and “Peglegs like tree trunks,” and “On his last peglegs,” and “Shake a pegleg,” and “Tail between your peglegs,” and “Without a pegleg to stand on,” and “You’re pulling my pegleg,” and “Stretch my peglegs.” Notes: if you’re on your last legs, then you’re near to exhaustion, death or giving up. To shake a leg is to hurry or begin something. If you don’t have a leg to stand on, you’re in a very rocky and disadvantageous position. 
  • Leg* → Pegleg*:  As in, “Peg-legacy,” and “What a peg-legend,” and “A peg-legitimate business,” and “Peg-legal,” and “Peg-legible,” and “Peg-legislation.”
  • Eyepatch → Aye-patch 
  • Eye → Eyepatch: As in, “All fun and games until somebody loses and eyepatch,” and “Avert one’s eyepatch,” and “Better than a poke in the eyepatch with a sharp stick,” and “More than meets the eyepatch,” and “Not a dry eyepatch in the house,” and “Turn a blind eyepatch,” and “Catch someone’s eyepatch.”
  • Crew: As in, “Motley crew,” and “Skeleton crew.” Notes: a skeleton crew is the minimum number of workers needed to operate an undertaking. A motley crew is a band of seemingly mismatched individuals of different backgrounds, personalities and appearances. 
  • Roger → Jolly roger: As in, “Jolly roger that.” Note: Jolly roger is the traditional English name for pirate flags.   
  • *crew: As in, “Screw it,” and “Unscrew,” and “Screwdriver,” and “Corkscrew.” 
  • Chew → Crew: As in, “Bite off more than you can crew,” and “Crew it over.” Note: to chew something over is to consider something at length.
  • *cru* → *crew*: Change words that have the “cru” sound in them to “crew” to make pirate puns: “Ac-crew,” and “Crew-cial,”, “Crew-cifix,”and “Crew-de,”, “Crew-l,” and “Crew-lty,”, “Crew-se,”, “Crew-sade,”, “Ex-crew-ciating,”, “Ins-crew-table,”, “Re-crew-t,”, “S-crew-pulous,”, “S-crew-ples,”, “S-crew-tinise,” and “S-crew-tiny.” Notes: to accrue is to slowly increase the amount you have of something over time. To be scrupulous is to be very honest.
  • Gutless → Cutlass: As in, “The cutlass wonder.” Note: this is a derogotary term used to indicate if someone is lacking in bravery.
  • Tank → Tankard: As in, “Built like a tankard,” and “Empty the tankard,” and “Think tankard.” Note: a think tank is a research group. 
  • Wash → Swashbuckle: As in, “All swashbuckled up,” and “Lost in the swashbuckle.” 
  • Buckle → Swashbuckle: As in, “Swashbuckle down,” and “Swashbuckle under the strain.” 
  • Ship: As in, “Abandon ship,” and “Loose lips sink ships,” and “Run a tight ship,” and “Shape up or ship out,” and “Ships that pass in the night,” and “That ship has sailed,” and “The start of a beautiful friendship,” and “Worship the ground someone walks on,” and “A stormy relationship.” Notes: Loose lips sink ships is a warning against gossip or unguarded talk. Ships in the night is a descriptor for strangers who meet for a short and intense moment and never meet again. 
  • Shop → Ship: As in, “All over the ship,” and “Shipping cart.”
  • Shape → Ship: As in, “All ships and sizes,” and “Get into ship,” and “The ship of things to come.” 
  • *ship: As in, “Relationship,”, “Worship,”, “Fellowship,”, “Leadership,”, “Scholarship,”, Friendship,” and “Hardship.” 
  • *sip* → *ship*: If a word contains “sip” it can usually be replaced with “ship”. For example: gosship (gossip), dishipate (dissipate), shipping (sipping), inshipid (insipid). See the boat puns entry for more.
  • *sib* → *ship*: If a word contains “sib” it can usually be replaced with “ship” to create a terrible pun. For example: posshiply (possibly), accesshipility (accessibility), incomprehenshiple, feashipble, irresponshipble, invishipble, ostenshipbly, revershipble, vishipble. An example sentence might be: “I am responshiple for my puns.”  See the boat puns entry for more.
  • Dec* → Deck*: As in, “Deck-line,” and “Deckree,”, “Deckadent,”, “Deckay,” and “Deckorum,”, “Deckade,” and “Decklaration,” and “Decksterity (dexterity).”
  • Deck: As in, “All hands on deck,” and “Deal from the bottom of the deck,” and “All decked out,” and “A stacked deck,” and “Triple decker.” Notes: To deal from the bottom of the deck is to put someone at a disadvantage using dishonest methods. To stack the deck is to arrange a situation in an unfair way against someone or something.  
  • Duck → Deck: As in, “Deck the question,” and “Decking and diving,” and “Like a deck to water,” and “Like water of a deck’s back,” and “Nice weather for decks.” 
  • Shirk → Shark: As in “Stop sharking your responsibilities and get the job done.”
  • Shiver: When sharks travel in groups, they’re called “shivers”. Example sentence: “Shark puns give me the shivers,” and “Shiver me timbers!”
  • Wish → Fish: As in “I just fish we had more time!” and “If you rub the lamp you get three fishes“.
  • Confiscate → Conch-fish-scate: As in “I’m going to have to conchfishcate your pun licence for that one.”
  • *fici* → *fishi*: If a word contains “fici” it can often be replaced with “fishi”. Here are some examples: affishionado, artifishial, benefishial, coeffishient, defishiency, defishit, ineffishient, suffishient, ofishial, profishient, superfishial.
  • Issue → Fishue: As in “That’s not the fishue here though.” and “I was fishued a sign for parking without a ticket”.
  • Umbrage → Um-brig: As in, “She took um-brig at his oblivious comments.” Notes: umbrage is offence or annoyance. 
  • Bring → Brig: As in, ‘Brig it on,” and “Brig it up,” and “You brig out the best in me,” and “Brig tears to your eyes,” and “Brig the house down,” and “Brig to a head,” and “Brig to the boil,” and “Brig to the table,” and “Brig people closer together,” and “Brig-ging up the rear.” To bring something to a head is to intensify a situation to the point that action must be taken. 
  • Bridge → Brig: As in, “Brig the gap,” and “Water under the brig,” and “We’ll cross that brig when we get to it.” Note: water under the bridge refers to past problems that are no longer stressful or troublesome. We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it means to not worry or stress about a possible situation until it actually happens. 
  • But → Boat: As in “Last boat not least” and “Close, boat no cigar,” and “Everything boat the kitchen sink.”
  • Saboteur → Saboateur : As in “Captain, I believe there’s a saboateur on our ship.”
  • Boat: As in, “Don’t rock the boat,” and “In the same boat,” and “Missed the boat,” and “Whatever floats your boat,” and “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.” Notes: to rock the boat is to say something that will upset the people around you. If you need a bigger boat, then you’ve underestimated the situation you’re in. 
  • Butt → Boat: As in, “Kick boat,” and “Kiss my boat,” and “Pain in the boat,” and “My boat is on the line,” and “Boat-terflies in my stomach.” 
  • Bowtie → Boat-tie: As in, “My boat-tie is too tight.” 
  • Beaut* → Boat*: As in, “Boat-iful people,” and “Boat-y mark,” and “I need my boat-y sleep,” and “Make boat-iful music together,” and “Boat-y is in the eye of the beholder,” and “Boat-y is only skin-deep.”
  • About/Abode → Aboat: As in “What aboat the captain?” and “Welcome to my aboat!”
  • What about → Water boat: As in “Water boat we have tofu curry for dinner tonight?” and “Water boat Daisy? Does she want to come to the beach too?”
  • Captain: As in, “Captain Hook,” and “Only the best for the captain’s table,” and “The captain’s pick.” 
  • Sel* → Sail*: If a word starts with “sel” a boat pun can often be made by replacing it with “sail”: sailection (selection), sailect (select), sailf (self), sailling (selling), sail (sell), saildom (seldom), sailfish (selfish), sailfless (selfless), sailective (selective).
  • Assail: As in “We were assailed by pirates on our way here.” and “This ship is unassailable.”
  • Sale → Sail: As in “There’s a big sail down at the boat store.”
  • *sale* → *sail*: Words containing “sale” can be turned into sailing puns: presail, resail, sailsclerk, sailsperson, wholesail.
  • Sell → Sail: As in, “Buy and sail,” and “Past its sail-by date,” and “Sail your soul to the devil,” and “Sailing like hot cakes.”
  • Sail*: As in, “Hello, sailor,” and “Plain sailing,” and “Sail away,” and “Smooth sailing,” and “Take the wind from my sails,” and “That ship has sailed.” Notes: to take the wind from someone’s sails is to discourage or cause them to lose hope and momentum. If that ship has sailed, then an opportunity has been missed and cannot be returned to. 
  • Exhale → Ex-sail: As in, “Inhale, ex-sail.”
  • *sil*→ *sail*: Words with a “sil” sound can be changed to “sail”: “Imbesail (imbecile),” and “Reconsail (reconcile),” and “Sailence (silence).”
  • Reckon → Wrecken: As in “Do you wrecken we’ll make it through the storm?” and “I am a force to be wreckened with.”
  • *rec* → *wreck*: Use words that have a “rec” sound to make nautical pirate puns: “Di-wrecked (direct),” and “Di-wreck-tion (direction),”, “E-wrecked (erect),”, “Wreck-ognise (recognise),”, “Pre-wreck-quisite (prerequisite),”, “Wreckless (reckless),”, “Wreckommend (recommend),”, “Wreckord (record),”, “Wrecktangle,” and “Wrecktify (rectify).”
  • Wreck: The word “wreck” has a few meanings other than shipwreck, including slang ones (like “Ohhh rekt!” and “He’s an emotional wreck.”) and the regular, formal ones (Like “My wedding was wrecked by the storm”).
  • Sea: As in, “All at sea,” and “Between the devil and the deep blue sea,” and “Deeper than the deep blue sea,” and “A sea change,” and “Other fish in the sea,” and “Sea legs.” Note: to have to choose between the devil and the deep blue sea is to be in a dilemma where both outcomes are undesirable. Sea legs is the skill of keeping one’s balance when on a boat or ship. 
  • *Sea*: As in, “Backseat driver,” and “The best seat,” and “Break the seal,” and “My lips are sealed,” and “Strawberry season,” and “In search of,” and “Bursting at the seams,” and “Buckle your seatbelt,” and “I’m feeling nausea,” and “Guard against disease,” and “Do your research.”
  • See → Sea: As in, “As far as the eye can sea,” and “Be the change you wish to sea in the world,” and “Can’t sea beyond the end of your nose,” and “Can’t sea the wood for the trees,” and “Come and sea me,” and “Sea no evil,” and “I call ’em as I sea ’em,” and “Long time no sea,” and “Monkey sea, monkey do,” and “I’m not sea-ing anyone,” and “Nowhere to be sea-n,” and “Sea eye to eye (or sea aye to aye might be more appropriate),” and “Sea the bigger picture,” and “Sea what the future has in store,” and “Sea-ing is believing,” and “I’ve sea-n better days,” and “Plant a sea-d.” Notes: If you can’t see the wood for the trees, then you’re unable to see the bigger picture because you’re too focused on the smaller details of the situation. 
  • She → Sea: As in, “By George, I think sea’s got it!” and “Every little thing sea does is magic,” and “I’ll have what sea’s having,” and “Steady as sea goes,” and “Thar sea blows.”
  • *see/cy* → *sea*: If a word has the “see” sound in it, we can use it to make nautical (naughty) pirate puns: “Absorben-sea (absorbency),”, “Accura-sea (accuracy),”, “Accountan-sea (accountancy),”, “Adequa-sea (adequacy),”, “Advoca-sea (advocacy),”, “Agen-sea (agency),”, “Ant-sea (antsy),”, “Aristocra-sea (aristocracy),”, “Beseach (beseech),”, “Sea-ge (seige),”, “Sea-d (seed),”, “Boun-sea (bouncy),”, “Candida-sea (candidacy),”, “Sea-dar (cedar),”, “Sea-ling (ceiling),”, “Competen-sea (competency),”, “Conseal (conceal),”, “Conseat (conceit),”, “Conspira-sea (conspiracy),”, “Curren-sea (currency),” and “Diploma-sea (diplomacy).”
  • Se* → Sea*: Some words that start with just “se” also have a “sea”-ish sound, and the ones that don’t can usually be made into terrible puns anyway: seacret, searious, seargeant, seacretion, seacure, seacurity, seacondary, seacretariat, seaconds, seacrete, searum, searenity, searvitude, seanile, seadation, seaclusion, seacretive, seaze, seaquential, sealection, seacretly, seaquences, seanior, seaniority, seagregate, seaping, seacession, seariousness, seaminars, seaveral, seaxual, seaparation, seantimental, seansational, seaquential, seacluded, seacularist, seathing, seaquin, seasame, seaclusion.
  • Seizure → Seazure: As in “If I read one more ocean pun I’m going to have a seazure.”
  • Scenic → Seanic: As in “Let’s take the seanic route.”
  • Ocean: As in, “A life on the ocean waves,” and “A drop in the ocean,” and “The motion of the ocean.” Note: a drop in the ocean is a tiny amount compared to what is actually needed. 
  • *o-shun* → *ocean*: We can make pirate puns using words that have the “o-shun” sound in them: “M-ocean (motion),”, “Em-ocean (emotion),”, “N-ocean (notion),”, “L-ocean (lotion),”, “Expl-ocean (explosion),”, “P-ocean (potion),”, “Comm-ocean (commotion),”, “Dem-ocean (demotion),”, “Dev-ocean (devotion),” and “Prom-ocean (promotion).” 
  • *wobb* → *swab*: As in, “Throw a swab-bly,” and “The colly-swabbles.” Notes: A swab is another term for mops used in cleaning ship decks. Swabbing is another word for mopping, or cleaning ship decks, and a swabber is someone who performs this task.  
  • Parrot: As in, “Sick as a parrot,” and “Parrot-fashion.” Notes: to do something in parrot-fashion means automatically or mechanically, without thought or real understanding. To be sick as a parrot is to be extremely ill or disappointed. 
  • *part → *parrot: As in, “A fool and his money are soon parroted,” and “It was good in some parrots,” and “I’ve been sad since the day we parroted,” and “If you’re not a parrot of the solution, you’re parrot of the problem,” and “Drift a-parrot,” and “Fall a-parrot,” and “No-one in parrot-icular,” and “House-warming parrot-y,” and “Get the parrot-y started,” and “Life of the parrot-y,” and “Parrot-ing of the ways,” and “Worlds a-parrot,” and “What parrot of ‘no’ don’t you understand?” 
  • Prepared → Pre-parrot: As in, “Chance favours the pre-parrot mind,” and “Here’s one I pre-parrot earlier,” and “Be pre-parrot.” 
  • Paradise→ Parrot-ise: As in, “A taste of parrot-ise,” and “Fool’s parrot-ise,” and “Trouble in parrot-ise.”
  • Carrot → Parrot: As in, “Parrot and stick.” Note: the carrot and stick are metaphors for using a mixture of reward and punishment to teach certain behaviours. 
  • *rot → *parrot: As in, “Parrot in hell,” and “Spoiled parrot-ten,” and “One parrot-ten apple can spoil the barrel,” and “Parrot-ten to the core.” Note: a rotten apple spoiling the barrel is a metaphor for one single bad influence (whether it be a person, belief, or personality trait) wrecking the entire thing or group. 
  • Sea → Sea dog: As in, “Between the devil and the deep blue sea dog,” and “Sun, sea dog and sand.” Note: a sea dog is someone who is experienced at sea. 
  • Gallery → Galley: As in, “A new art galley.” Note: Galleys have two meanings: a kitchen in a ship, or a type of ship.
  • Alley → Galley: As in, “Galley cat,” and “Right up your galley.”
  • Cannon: As in, “Cannon fodder,” and “Loose cannon.” Notes: Cannon fodder is a  derogatory term for soldiers who are regarded by government as expendable. A loose cannon is a person who is likely to cause unintentional damage.
  • Cannibal → Cannonball: As in, “Corporate cannonballism.” Note: corporate cannibalism is where a company is seemingly “eating into” its own market of established products. 
  • Tears → Privateers: As in, “Blood, sweat and privateers,” and “Bathed in privateers,” and “Crocodile privateers,” and “Fighting back the privateers,” and “It will all end in privateers,” and “No more privateers.” Notes: a privateer is someone who is privately hired to engage in maritime warfare.
  • Wonder → Plunder: As in, “Gutless plunder,” and “It’s a plunder-ful life,” and “Nine days’ plunder,” and “A small plunder,” and “Where plunders never cease,” and “A one-hit plunder.” Note: to plunder is to loot and steal.
  • *anker → *anchor: most words ending in “anker” can be anchor puns: banchor (banker), tanchor (tanker), flanchor (flanker), hanchor (flanker), spanchor (flanker), danchor (danker).
  • Map: As in, “Mind map,” and “On the map,” and “All over the map.”
  • Mop → Map: As in, “Map the floor with.” Note: to mop the floor with someone is to thoroughly defeat them. 
  • Offer → Coffer: As in, “Open to coffers,” and “A coffer you can’t refuse.” Note: a coffer is a chest for treasure. 
  • Cover → Coffer: As in, “Blow your coffer,” and “Coffer to coffer,” and “Extra coffer,” and “We’ve got you coffered,” and “A startling dis-coffer-y!” 
  • Hold: As in, “Can’t hold a candle to,” and “Don’t hold your breath,” and “Got a hold on the wrong end of the stick,” and “Hold a grudge,” and “Hold a mirror up to society,” and “Hold a torch for,” and “Hold all the cards,” and “Hold at bay,” and “Hold back on,” and “Hold it right there!” and “No holds barred,” and “A sight to behold,” and “Lo and behold.” Notes: if you can’t hold a candle to something or someone, then you are very lowly in comparison to them. If there are no holds barred, that means that anything goes in a situation. Lo and behold is an exclamation demanding that one’s attention be directed to a certain thing. 
  • Cock → Coxswain: As in, “Coxswain and bull story.” Note: a coxswain is someone in charge of the navigation and steering of a boat. 
  • Board → Starboard: As in, “All above starboard,” and “Across the starboard.” Note: starboard refers to the right-side orientation on a boat. 
  • Plank: As in, “Take a long walk off a short plank,” and “Walk the plank.” Note: walking the plank was a method of execution used by pirates. Victims were bound so they were unable to swim, then made to walk off a wooden plank into the ocean. 
  • Blank → Plank: As in, “A plank slate,” and “Plank canvas,” and “A plank look,” and “Drawing a plank,” and “Point plank range,” and “I’m planking out,” and “Fill in the plank,” and “Wet plank-et.” Note: a wet blanket is someone that dampens enjoyment or excitement. 
  • Thank → Plank: As in, “Accept with planks,” and “Give planks,” and “Plank god it’s Friday,” and “Plank you for the music,” and “Planks for nothing,” and “Plank your lucky stars,” and “Be plankful.”
  • Sword: As in, “Cross swords with,” and “A double-edged sword,” and “Fall on your sword,” and “Put to the sword,” and “The pen is mightier than the sword.” Notes: a double-edged sword is a thing that provides both benefits and disadvantages. To put someone to the sword is to execute them. To say that the pen is mightier than the sword is to express that the the media is more powerful than the military.  
  • Sort → Sword: As in, “Last re-sword,” and “I’m out of swords,” and “Sword the wheat from the chaff,” and “Sword yourself out,” and “Sword of.” Note: to sort the wheat from the chaff is to sort valuable things or people from those that aren’t needed. 
  • Word → S-word: As in, “A picture paints a thousand s-words,” and “A s-word to the wise,” and “Actions speak louder than s-words,” and “As good as your s-word,” and “Don’t mince s-words,” and “Famous last s-words,” and “Get a s-word in edgeways,” and “The last s-word.” Note: to not mince your words is to not be gentle in your communications – to use blunt and direct language. 
  • Barely → Parley: As in, “Parley there,” and “Parley noticeable.” Note: to parley is to have negotiations with an opposing side. 
  • Sure → Shore: As in “Are you shore?” and “She shore is strong!” and “I shore will.”
  • Shore: As in, “Ship to shore,” and “Shore up.” Note: to shore up is to support something by placing something under or against it. 
  • Not → Knot: As in “Tell me this is knot happening.” and “Knot on my watch.”
  • Not → Naut: As in “I’m naut going to keep arguing with you,” and “Last but naut least,” and “Fear naut!”
  • Naughty → Nauty: As in “There’s that nauty sailor again”.
  • Specific → Pacific: As in “You need to be more pacific.” and “Are you sure you have the pacifications for this?” and “Pacifically, there are two apples and three nectarines.”
  • Passivist → Pascificist: As in “I’m a pascificst. Violence is never the answer.”
  • *ways → *waves: Words than end in “ways” can be made into bad wave puns: alwaves (always), railwaves (railways), sidewaves, pathwaves, lengthwaves, doorwaves.
  • Wave: “Wave goodbye” and “Mexican wave” and “Heat wave” and “Wave the white flag” and “Brain waves“.
  • Cog*: As in, “Cogito ergo sum,” and “Just another cog in the machine.” Notes: cogito ergo sum is a philosophical expression meaning “I think, therefore I am.” A cog is a type of ship. 
  • Clog → Cog: As in, “Clever cogs,” and “Cog up,” and “Pop your cogs.” Notes: Clever clogs is a disapproving way of saying that someone is clever, but in an irritating way. To pop your clogs is to die. 
  • *cog*: As in, “Cognitive,” and “Cognition,” and “Incognito,” and “Recognise,” and “Recognition.” 
  • Sooner → Schooner: As in “Schooner or later.” and “I’ll call her schoon“. A “schooner” is a sailing ship with two or more masts.
  • Slope → sloop: A “sloop” is a type of sailboat with one mast. Example sentence: “Hold on! This is a steep sloop.”
  • Fathom: A “fathom” is a unit of length equal to 6 feet (~1.8m) and is most commonly used in reference to the depth of water. Example sentences: “I can’t fathom what she means.” and “It’s completely unfathomable!”
  • Overboard: As in, “Man overboard!” and “This is going overboard.”
  • Tack → Hardtack: As in, “As sharp as a hardtack.” Note: hardtack is a type of hard biscuit/bread that was commonly eaten on voyages due to it being cheap and long-lasting. 
  • Kraken: As in, “Release the kraken!” Note: the kraken is a legendary sea monster that is popular in pirate stories and mythology. 
  • Cracking → Kraken: As in, “Get kraken!” 
  • Crack → Kraken: As in, “At the kraken of dawn,” and “Kraken a smile,” and “Have a kraken at it,” and “Snap, kraken, and pop.”
  • Afraid → Afeared: As in, “Afeared of your own shadow,” and “Afeared so,” and “Be afeared, be very afeared,” and “Everything you always wanted to know but were afeared to ask,”  and “I’m not afeared of death.” Note: “afeared” is a common bit of pirate lingo. 
  • Go out → Gout: As in, “Don’t gout of your way,” and “Gout on a limb,” and “Gout with a bang,” and “Gout like a light,” and “Good manners never gout of style,” and “I’d like to gout.” Notes: gout is a disease that commonly afflicted pirates due to their lifestyle. 
  • About → Agout: As in, “Agout time,” and “It’s not all agout you,” and “Beat agout the bush,” and “No two ways agout it,” and “Nothing to write home agout,” and “Out and agout.”
  • *goat* → *gout*: As in, “Scapegout,” and “Nice goutee.” Note: a scapegoat is a person who is blamed for the mistakes or wrongdoings of others. 
  • Got → Gout: As in, “I think you’ve gout it,” and “Cat gout your tongue?” and “Give it all you’ve gout,” and “She’s gout a flair for,” and “I’ve gout a soft spot for,” and “Gout it down to a fine art,” and “Hasn’t gout two cents to rub together,” and “Have I gout news for you,” and “The one that gout away.” 
  • Bulge → Bilge: As in, “Battle of the bilge.” Note: a bilge is the underwater part of a ship. Also used as a dismissive term for anything determined to be nonsense or rubbish.
  • Spot → Black spot: As in, “A leopard cannot change its black spots,” and “Got a soft black spot for,” and “Hit the black spot,” and “In a tight black spot,” and “X marks the black spot.” Note: a black spot is a marker of death in the pirating world. 
  • Dinghy → Dingy: A “dinghy” is a small boat and it sounds a bit like the word “dingy” which has multiple slang definitions including “gloomy and drab”.
  • Slope → sloop: A “sloop” is a type of sailboat with one mast. Example sentence: “Hold on! This is a steep sloop.”
  • *sk if → As skiff: If the word “if” follows a word that ends in “sk” then we can create a play on “skiff” (a type of shallow, flat-bottomed boat). Example sentences: “Before giving it to her, askiff she wants it.” and “We’ll be back by duskiff we can fix this motor.” Many more words fit this pattern: riskiff (risk if), deskiff (desk if), taskiff (task if), diskiff, maskiff, briskiff, flaskiff, kioskiff, baskiff, whiskif, muskiff.
  • *s if → As skiff: If the word “if” follows a word that ends in “s” then we can create a play on “skiff” (a type of shallow, flat-bottomed boat). Example sentences: “As skiff!” and “You sound as skiff you’re a bit sick?” and “Ask us skiff you need anything!” There are obviously thousands of words ending in “s” so you can create your own puns using this formula with the help of a list like this.
  • Y’all → Yawl: As in “How are yawl doing today?” A yawl is a type of sailboat.
  • Cuddle → S-cuttle: As in, “S-cuttle buddy,” and “Want to s-cuttle?” Note: to scuttle is to sink a ship. 

The following puns are based on popular fictional pirates.

  • Pearl → Black pearl: As in, “A string of black pearls,” and “Black pearls of wisdom.” Note: The Black Pearl is the ship in the first movie of the Pirates of the Carribean series. 
  • Jack → Jack Sparrow: As in, “All work and no play makes Jack Sparrow a dull boy,” and “Every Jack Sparrow has his Jill.” Note: Jack Sparrow is a fictional pirate from the Pirates of the Caribbean series. 
  • Hook → Captain Hook: As in, “By Captain Hook or by crook,” and “Captain Hook, line, and sinker,” and “I’m Captain Hooked.”
  • One → One Piece:  As in, “All for One Piece and One Piece for all,” and “An army of One Piece,” and “And then there was One Piece,” and “Down it in One Piece.” Note: One Piece is a wildly popular manga about pirates. 
  • Fluffy → F-luffy: As in, “A f-luffy bunny.” Note: Luffy is the Captain of the Straw Hat pirates and the main protagonist from One Piece. 
  • Tsunami → Tsu-nami: As in, “Wreckage from the tsu-nami,” and “There’s a tsu-nami coming.” Note: Nami is the navigator for the Straw Hat pirates from One Piece. 
  • Gold → Gol D. Roger: As in, “After the Gol D rush,” and “All that glitters is not Gol D,” and “As good as Gol.D Roger,” and “Fool’s Gol D,” and “Get a Gol D star,” and “A heart of Gol D,” and “A Gol D mine.” Note: Gol.D Roger is the legendary Pirate King in One Piece. 
  • Straw → Straw Hat: As in, “A drowning man will clutch at a straw hat,” and “The last straw hat,” and “Draw the short straw hat.” 

Pirate-Related Words

To help you come up with your own pirate puns, here’s a list of related words to get you on your way. We’ve split these words up into categories to make it easier to read and use. If you come up with any new puns or related words, please feel free to share them in the comments!

General: pirate, crew, rum, booty, treasure, pieces of eight, doubloon, loot, bounty, grog, tankard, boatswain, swashbuckle/swashbuckler, hook, pegleg, eyepatch, skull and crossbones, jolly roger, buccaneer, cutlass, mutiny, ship, deck, brig, flog, sea, blunderbuss, davy jones’ locker, jack, black spot, gout, hardtack, privateer, plunder, pillage, coffer, swab/swabber, scallywag, rapscallion, scuttle, sea dog, captain, ocean, boat, first mate, swab, hold, map, telescope, parrot, anchor, poop deck, bilge, coxswain, starboard, plank, sail, wreck, chest, scurvy, galley, cannon, marooned, hornswaggle, parley, shore, harbour, pier, nautical, clipper, cog, galleon, long boat, schooner, sloop, fathom, port, overboard, kraken

Lingo: arr, aye aye, ahoy, matey, avast ye, hearty, me hearties, shiver me timbers, landlubber, thar she blows, yo ho ho, cap’n, afeared, lily-livered, bilge rat

Fictional: black pearl, pirates of the carribean, jack sparrow, elizabeth swann, bluebeard, captain hook, flying dutchman,  one piece, luffy, nami, sanji, zoro, usopp, gol.d roger, straw hat pirates, tony chopper, nico robin, franky, brook, jimbei, captain feathersword

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Candy Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on candy puns! 🍬 🍭 This entry covers general candy-related topics and also specific candy types and brands. Regarding candy brand names, I’ve tried to stick to international brands that most readers would recognise, but there may be a few brands in here which are specific to certain regions. Also, in some cases there is a fine line between candy and dessert, so you may find (what you may class as) dessert puns in this entry too.

Finally, the word “candy” is a North American thing, and so this article’s title might be translated to “sweets puns” or “lolly puns” depending on where you’re from 😉

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on food puns, chocolate punsice cream punsHalloween puns, Easter puns and fruit puns.

Candy Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about candy that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Candy: As in “Eye candy” and “As easy as taking candy from a baby” and “Ear candy” and “He’s such a candy-ass (coward) when it comes to standing up for what he believes in.” and “Don’t try to candy-coat it – you lied, plain and simple.” and “They’re not actually dating – he’s just arm candy to make her parents happy.”
  • Uncanny → Uncandy: As in “He had an uncandy feeling that she was being watched.”
  • Ghandi → Candy: As in “Mahatma Candy was an exceptional human being.”
  • Can they → Candy: As in “How candy hear if they don’t have ears?”
  • Handy → Candy: As in “This will definitely come in candy.”
  • Scant → S-candy: As in “They worked long hours but received only s-candy wages.”
  • Can these → Candies: As in “How candies people live like this?” and “Candies desks be shifted over there?” and “Candies drafts – they’re no good.”
  • Sugar: As in “Oh sugar!” and “What’s wrong, sugar?” and “Gimme some sugar” and “Sugar daddy.”
  • Connection → Confection: As in “The police have interviewed several people in confection with the stolen sweets,” and “As soon as we met we had an instant confection.”
  • Confession → Confection: As in “I have a confection to make…” and “Confection is good for the soul,” and “The interrogators soon got a confection out of him.”
  • Conviction → Confection: As in “She had a previous confection for a similar offence,” and “She has strong political confections, and she’s not afraid to defend them.” and “She spoke powerfully and with confection.”
  • Sweet: As in “You’re so sweet!” and “Oh that’s soo sweet!” and “Revenge is sweet” and “Short and sweet” and “Lay some sweet lines on someone” and “Sweet dreams” and “Sweet Jesus!” and “You bet your sweet life!” and “That was a sweet trick, dude.” and “Sweet as, bro.” and “Whisper sweet nothings” and “Home sweet home” and “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet” and “Sweet smell/taste of success/victory” and “Sweetheart
  • Suite → Sweet: As in “She was renting a 2-bedroom sweet for the summer.”
  • Sweat → Sweet: As in “Blood, sweet and tears” and “Beads of sweet rolled down my forehead” and “Break out in a cold sweet” and “By the sweet of my brow” and “Don’t sweet it.” and “Don’t sweet the small stuff.” and “All hot and sweety
  • Sweater → Sweeter: As in “A close-knit woollen sweeter for cold days”
  • Switch → Sweet-ch: As in “Bait and sweet-ch” and “Asleep at the sweet-ch” and “Sweet-ch gears” and “You should sweet-ch out your old one with this one.”
  • Switzerland → Sweetzerland: As in “Zürich is a lovely city in Sweetzerland.”
  • Seat → Sweet: As in, “Backsweet driver” and “By the sweet of your pants” and “Hold on to your sweet” and “Not a dry sweet in the house” and “On the edge of my sweet” and “Please be sweeted” and “Take a back sweet” and “The best sweet in the house.”
  • Desert → Dessert: As in “The Sahara dessert.” and “Just desserts.” and “How could you dessert me at the moment I needed you the most?”
  • Dissertation → Dessertation: As in “I wrote my diploma dessertation on candy puns.”
  • Does it → Dessert: As in “It’s comfy, but dessert make my bum look big?” and “Dessert not worry you that society cares so much about appearance?”
  • Mellow → Mallow: As in “She took on a more mallow personality when she moved to the country.” and “Mallow out.” (This is a marshmallow pun in case you missed it)
  • Much → Marsh: This may not quite fit as a candy pun, but if your context is allows for subtle marshmallow puns, these might work:”Too marsh information” and “There’s not marsh to it” and “Too marsh of a good thing” and “Too marsh too soon” and “Marsh obliged” and “It doesn’t amount to marsh.” and “It’s not marsh to look at, but …” and “Thank you very marsh.” and “Without so marsh as a …” and “Nothing marsh.” and “It leaves marsh to be desired.”
  • Sugarcoat: As in “She’s very straightforward. She doesn’t sugarcoat the truth.” and “They tend to sugar-coat it to make it more appealing to the masses.”
  • Came → Cane: This could be a candy cane pun or a sugar cane pun. Examples: “There’s plenty more where that cane from.” and “His overseas trips cane into question after the costs were calculated.” and “We only just cane short of a gold medal.” and “And that’s where I cane in …” and “The whole thing cane crashing down.”
  • Can → Cane: As in “You cane do it!” and “Cane do.” and “You’re opening a cane of worms here.” and “Cane you imagine?” and “As best one cane.” and “I cane live with that.” and “Kick the cane down the road” and “No cane do!”
  • Gain → Cane: As in “We need to cane the upper hand.” and “We’ve caned entrance to the building.” and “We’re cane-ing ground against our competitors.” and “No pain, no cane.” and “One person’s loss is another person’s cane.” and “Nothing ventured, nothing caned.”
  • lol → lol-ly: As in “Lol-ly that  was a good candy pun.”
  • Daffy Duck → Taffy Duck
  • Gun → Gum: As in “A smoking gum” and “Son of a gum!” and “I’m under the gum at the moment.” and “Don’t jump the gum!”
  • Game → Gum: These can be chewing gum puns, gumdrop puns or puns for whatever gum-based candy you want: “A gum of musical chairs” and “This is a losing gum” and “She’s at the top of her gum today” and “It’s all just fun and gums” and “He was beaten at his own gum” and “Two can play at this gum.” and “Now we play the waiting gum” and “That’s the name of the gum” and “It’s a zero-sum gum.” and “What’s our gum plan?” and “Gum, set, match!”
  • Gung-ho → Gum-ho: In English usage, the term “gung-ho” means “unthinkingly enthusiastic and eager” – especially in relation to fighting and warfare.
  • com* → gum*: If a word begins with “com” (or similar) it can sometimes be turned into a terrible gum pun: gumbatant (combatant), gumbustion (combustion), gumfortably (comfortably), gummemoration (commemoration), gummercialisation, gummodities, gumpany (company), gummunication, gumparative, gumparisons, gumpetition, gumprised, gumpulsive, gumpulsion, gumputer, gumbersome.
  • Gamble → Gumball: As in “He gumballed all his money away.” and “I wouldn’t gumball on it. Its not likely to happen.”
  • Liquor is → Licorice: As in “Licorice a destructive force in many communities.” and “Like cannabis, licorice a drug that people use for entertainment.”
  • Jealous → Jelly: As in “Omg your puns are so much better than mine. I’m so jelly.”
  • Jealous … been → Jelly … bean: As in “I’m so jelly that I’ve bean saving up to buy what you’ve got.”
  • Bar: As in “We managed to find them all, bar one.” and “They barred the door.” and “It’s a small bar that’s only open on weekends.”
  • *bar*: If a word contains the “bar” sound it may be an easy candy/chocolate bar pun: barbarian, barbecue, barbie, barcelona, bargaining, bargain, barnacles, barn, bombarded, embark, crowbar, handlebars.
  • Mint: As in “It is in mint condition.” and “We mint 3000 new coins here each day.”
  • Meant → Mint: As in “We were mint to be.” and “He mint the world to me” and “No offence mint.”
  • Minute → Mint: As in “I’ll be down in just a mint!” and “Wait a mint…” and “I’ll be with you in a mint.” and “Any mint now…” and “Come here this very mint.” and “Last-mint flights are always expensive.”
  • *ment → *mint: If a word ends with “ment” it can usually be turned into a terrible mint pun. Sometimes mints are called “peppermints” or “spearmints”. You can emphasise the “mint” part if you want – I’ve used underlines here for the first few: governmint, developmint, momint, managemint, departmint, movemint, agreemint, environmint, treatmint, statemint, investmint, employmint, argumint, parliamint, equipmint, elemint, commint, documint, paymint, assessmint, commitmint, requiremint, arrangemint, improvemint, appointmint, settlemint, experimint, establishmint, involvemint, instrumint, achievemint, judgmint, retiremint, unemploymint, implemint, judgemint, replacemint, excitemint, announcemint, punishmint, measuremint, amendmint, supplemint, entertainmint, tournamint, adjustmint, fragmint, advertisemint, disappointmint, recruitmint, pavemint, apartmint, encouragemint, assignmint, imprisonmint, engagemint, embarrassmint, regimint, enforcemint, testamint, complemint, segmint, amusemint, resentmint, enjoymint, monumint, disagreemint, garmint, placemint, attainmint, repaymint, attachmint, sedimint, basemint, sentimint, entitlemint, cemint, compartmint, complimint, acknowledgemint, harassmint, astonishmint, temperamint, endowmint, detachmint, endorsemint, deploymint, amazemint, enhancemint, ornamint, enlightenmint, reinforcemint, advancemint, abandonmint, refreshmint, infringemint, instalmint, alignmint, refinemint, shipmint, tormint, accompanimint, displacemint, impairmint, redevelopmint, indictmint, refurbishmint, bereavemint, predicamint, consignmint, embankmint, augmint, allotmint, enrolmint, procuremint, postponemint, confinemint, lamint, containmint, assortmint, detrimint, pigmint, catchmint, enlargemint, enactmint, bombardmint, tenemint, enrichmint, parchmint, sacramint, ailmint, disarmamint, clemint, armamint, adjournmint, enchantmint, resettlemint, internmint, reimbursemint, bewildermint, realignmint, disillusionmint, inducemint, pronouncemint, disablemint, embodimint, puzzlemint, understatemint, incremint, reassessmint, rearrangemint, encroachmint, commandmint, commencemint, ligamint, filamint, impedimint, fermint, contentmint, accomplishmint, nourishmint, escapemint, escarpmint, estrangemint, entanglemint, figmint, mismanagemint, divestmint, ointmint, curtailmint, incitemint, encampmint, embellishmint, empowermint, impeachmint, prefermint, pedimint, discouragemint, embezzlemint, acknowledgmint, decremint, reinstatemint, apportionmint, concealmint, casemint, restatemint, retrenchmint, redeploymint, wondermint, abatemint, readjustmint, underdevelopmint, battlemint, excremint, underachievemint, merrimint, fomint, fitmint, easemint, appeasemint, endearmint, banishmint, atonemint, replenishmint, rudimint, emplacemint, emolumint, annulmint, bettermint, adornmint, vestmint, impoverishmint, disbursemint, discernmint, pretreatmint, disengagemintdisenchantmint, vehement. If that list isn’t big enough for you, you can find more words ending in “ment” here.
  • Kooky → Cookie: As in “Stop acting all cookie, you’re scaring the kids!”
  • So close → Sucrose: As in “Sucrose yet so far.”
  • Fudge: As in “Oh fudge!” and “These figures have obviously been fudged.” and “The authorities have fudged the issue”
  • Rock: If the context in which you’re punning is right, you may be able to make rock candy puns by slipping “rock” word play into your communications: “Don’t rock the boat” and “We’ve hit rock bottom” and “Between a rock and a hard place” and “Let’s rock and roll!” and “We rock!” and “Rock your world”
  • *roc* → *rock*: Some terrible rock candy puns can be made using words containing the “rock” sound. As explained above, these will likely only pass as candy puns if your context is weighted towards rock candy. Examples: app-rocks-imate, b-rock-oli, bu-rock-racy, frock, p-rock-lamation, p-rocks-imity.
  • Sourball: As well as referring to a round, sour piece of candy, this can informally refer to a person who has a tendency to be grumpy and/or pessimistic.
  • Life saver: As in “Thanks! You’re a life saver!”
  • Sucker: In North America this is another term for “lollipop”. Examples:  “So long, suckers!” and “I always was a sucker for a good fairy tale.” and “He’s one strong sucker!”
  • Brittle: This refers to a type of candy which is brittle (hence the name) and composed of hardened sugar and nuts. Examples: “Their marriage is very brittle.” and “I fear that the relations between the countries are very brittle.” and “His speech sounded inauthentic and brittle.”
  • Waste → Waist: Since high-sugar foods like candy are a major contributor to obesity, you might be able to make a “waist” pun depending on your context: “It’s a waist of breath/energy.” and “Don’t let it go to waist.” and “You’ll waist away.” and “They laid waist to the village.” and “Waist not, want not.” and “Toxic waist” and “Haste makes waist.”
  • Give me (Gimme) → Gummy / Gummi: As in “Oh gummy a break will you!” and “Oh lordy, gummy a sign.” and “Gummy liberty or gummy death.”

The following puns are mostly based around specific brands of candy, rather than general candy-related words:

  • Smarty: As in “Well you’re a bit of a smarty pants aren’t you!” and “I’m trying to learn from all the smarties in my math class.”
  • Could bury → Cadbury: As in “I cadbury myself in my work for hours without noticing.” and “You cadbury your head in the sand but it wouldn’t solve the issue.”
  • Kinder: The Kinder Surprise is a famous chocolate egg with a surprise toy inside. Although “Kinder” is pronounced “k-ih-nder”, we still might get away with using it in place of the word “kinder” as in “more kind”. Examples: “You wont find a Kinder soul on Earth.” and “Maybe if you were Kinder to others, then others would be Kinder to you.”
  • Kind of (Kinda) → Kinder: As in “I’m still Kinder disappointed that we missed the show.” and “I’m still Kinder Surprised about that.”
  • Kindest → Kinder-st: As in “Kinderst regards, …” and “He is the Kinder-st person I’ve ever met.”
  • Sour patch: As in “I’m going through a sour patch right now, but I’m determined to get through it.”
  • Extra: (A reference to the brand of chewing gum) As in “Extra, extra, read all about it!” and “Go the extra mile.” and “I could use an extra pair of hands.”
  • Nerds: (A reference to the Wonka candy) As in “I’m a bit of a nerd when it comes to tea.” and “Nerds now rule the world.”
  • Many →Good & Plenty: As in “Good & Plenty hands make light work” and “Good & Plenty a true word is spoken in jest.”
  • Snickers: As in “There were a few rude snickers from the audience as she left the stage.”
  • Laugh → Snickers: As in “I snickered all the way to the bank.” and “Snicker your head off.” and “The audience burst out snickering.” and “Rolling on the floor snickering.”
  • Pieces → Reese’s Pieces: As in “It got blown to Reese’s Pieces.” and “There were all sorts of bits and Reese’s Pieces at the garage sale.” and “After the accident they all needed some time to pick up the Reese’s Pieces.”
  • *pez*: If a word contains the “pez” sound (or similar) we can make some silly Pez puns: pezimistic, pezimism, pezant, pezantry, pezticide, pezter (pester), spezification, spezified, Budapezt, spezimen.
  • Her? She’s … → Her? Shey’s: As in “Who? Her? Shey’s been hanging around here for a while.”
  • Roll over → Rolo-ver: As in “Rolo-ver onto your belly and into pushup position.”
  • Tricks → Twix: As in “I’ve got a few twix up my sleeves.” and “I’ve had enough of your dirty twix!” and “Up to your old twix I see?” and “You can’t teach an old dog new twix.” and “Twix of the trade.” and “Bag of twix” and “How’s twix?”
  • Warheads: As in “There is increasing concern over the number of nuclear warheads in the world.”
  • Tomorrow → To-moro: As in “What are you up to tomoro?” and “To-moro is another day.” and “As if there were no to-moro” and “Here today, gone tomoro” and “Tomoro never comes”
  • Bounty: As in “He has a large bounty on his head.” and “One of the bounties of nature.”
  • Crunchy → Crunchie
  • Aero: As in “The small aeroplane was incredibly agile.”
  • Flake: As in “He so unreliable – total flake.” and “She’s a bit flaky.”
  • Picnic: As in “It’s no picnic!” and “One sandwich short of a picnic” and “A nice picnic in the park.”
  • Airhead: As in “He talks a lot, but doesn’t really think much – bit of an airhead.”
  • 100 Grand: As in “That think must be worth 100 grand!”
  • Eclipse: As in “The economy has eclipsed the environment as the main issue.”
  • Wriggly → Wrigley: As in “They’re so wrigley I can barely hold them!”
  • Payday: As in “I can’t afford it until payday.”
  • Zero: As in “Ground zero” and “We have a zero tolerance policy” and “It’s a zero-sum game” and “She went from zero to hero” and “We need to zero in on the cause.”
  • Mounds: As in “It’ll bring you mounds of joy.”
  • Score → Skor: As in “But who’s keeping skor?” and “Four skor and seven years ago” and “She know’s the skor” and “I’ve got a skor to settle.”
  • Race → Reese: As in “Reese you to the top?” and “It’s a reese against time” and “Off to the reese’s” and “I don’t have a horse in this reese.”

Candy-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of candy-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

candy, candies, sugar, chocolate, confection, confectionery, rock candy, sweet, dessert, caramel, marshmallow, candy cane, sugarcoat, hard candy, lollipop, taffy, gumdrop, licorice, liquorice, cotton candy, candyfloss, syrup, chewing gum, bonbon, nougat, sweeten, praline, butterscotch, toffee, turkish delight, jelly bean, candy corn, candy bar, chocolate bar, milk chocolate, sweets, mint, sweetener, cookies, cookie, gummy, lolly, sugary, saccharine, sucrose, fructose, glucose, sugarcane, fudge, rock, jelly, jawbreaker, gobstopper, peppermint, fondant, jujube, lozenge, sugarplum, nonpareil, horehound, easter egg, sweet tooth, lemon drop, sourball, chewy, dark chocolate, brittle, life savers, bar, suck, sucker, sweet tooth, spearmint, candy corn, diabetes, waist, blood sugar, obesity, cavities, tooth decay

smarties, cadbury, nestle, kinder surprise, kinder, pez, gummi bears, gummy worms, reese’s pieces, reese’s sticks, hershey bar, lindt, maltesers, kit kat, hershey’s kisses, milk duds, milky way, rolo, snickers, twix, whoppers, m&m’s, jelly tots, jolly rancher, twizzlers, chupa chups, sugar daddy, warheads, sour patch kids, milky way, extra, aero, bounty, crunchie, curly wurly, flake, moro, picnic, toblerone, twirl, wonka, nerds, zero, 3 musketeers, skor, cherry ripe, skittles, 100 grand, airheads, sour punch, runts, pop rocks, sweet eye, sugar baby, dove, hot tamale, eclipse, fishermen’s friend, fox’s glacier, wrigley, excel, mentos, minties, polo, tic tac, juicy fruit, hubba bubba, trident, milk duds, spree, starburst, werther’s originals, rolo, oreos, riesens

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