Dolphin Puns

This Punpedia entry is all about dolphin puns! The most famous dolphin pun involves the play on “porpoise” to replace the word “purpose”. Technically, porpoises aren’t dolphins, but they are very closely related, so we’re grouping them in here. Being aquatic mammals, and specifically cetaceans, dolphins are also closely related to whales, so head over to the entry on whale puns if you’re looking for more cetacean-themed puns. Also, although technically orcas (killer whales) are part of the dolphin family, they’re included in both the whale puns entry and this entry. You might also like to check out the entries on beach puns, ocean puns and fish puns.

As with all entries on Punpedia, if you’ve got a great pun, you can post it in the comments and one of our curators will add it to this entry. And if you’re looking for visual puns, there’s a collection of visual dolphin puns towards the end of this entry.

Dolphin Puns List

Each item in this list of dolphin puns is either a simple word-swap (e.g. Purpose → Porpoise) or it may be a general rule from which multiple puns can be made. In the case of general rules, the asterisks sign (*) represents one or more letters.

  • Purpose → Porpoise: As in “I didn’t do it on porpoise!” and “They porpoisefully moved toward me.” and “I can tell you’re being porpoisely vague.” and “They are not to be used for illegal porpoises.” and “I love my new multi-porpoise cleaning spray!”
  • Something → Somefin: As in “There’s somefin about the way he walks” and “Is that a shark, or somefin else?”.
  • Nothing → Nofin: As in “Nofin is better than swimming with dolphins” and “I’ve got nofin left to give!”.
  • Fan* → Fin*: “fan” can sometimes be replaced with “fin” at the start of words to create fin puns: fintastic (fantastic), finciful (fanciful), finfare (fanfare), fintasy, findom, finciful.
  • Fine/Fin./Find/Fun → Fin: The word “fin” can be used to replace many small words than have both ‘f’ and ‘n’ like “fun” and “find”. The term “fin” also a French word meaning “finish”, and so is sometimes seen at the end of old films and books.
  • *fin*: If a word contains “fin”, it’s an easy dolphin pun: affinity, coffin, definitive, definitively, finch, finesse, finishfinished, finnish, finland, infinity, infinitesimal.
  • Poor person → Porpoise-on: As in “That porpoise-on, just can’t stop making dolphin puns.”
  • Defin* → Dolphin: As in “We dolphinitely need more time to finish the mission.” and “What is the dolphinition of this word?” and “Please dolphine this word.” and “It’s the dolphinitive source of Nordic history.”
  • In* → Fin*: A lovely and shameful pun can be made from any word starting with “in”. Simply replace “in” with “fin”: finformation, finfluence, finvolve, finternational, finvolved, fintroduce, findeed, finvestment, finto, finclude, finteresting, fintellectual, finjury, fintend, finterview, finsurance, finstrument, … Thousand more can be made with the help of a list like this.
  • *fici* → *fishi*: If a word contains “fici” it can often be replaced with “fishi”. Here are some examples: affishionado, artifishial, benefishial, coeffishient, defishiency, defishit, ineffishient, suffishient, ofishial, profishient, superfishial.
  • Issue → Fishue: As in “That’s not the fishue here though.” and “I was fishued a sign for parking without a ticket”.
  • Orchestra → Orcastra: As in “It was a small orcastra, but it was nice.” and of course conjugations like orcastratration, orcastrator and orcastrate can also be made. Remember, orcas are part of the dolphin family of aquatic mammals.
  • Accom* → Orcam*: If a word begins with “accom”, a terrible/amazing orca pun can be made: orcammadate (accomodate), orcampany (accompany), orcamplished (accomplished), orcamplice (accomplice), orcampaniments (accompaniments), orcamplice (accomplice).
  • Killer: Orca‘s are also known as killer whales (even though they’re dolphins), so you can slip “killer” into a sentence for a subtle pun: “These jokes are just killer!” and “Oh wow, that was a killer whale pun.”
  • Door salesperson → Dorsals person: As in “Door-to-dorsals people are really annoying.” and “Does anyone actually buy things from dorsalsmen?”
  • Mum will / Mum’ll → Mammal: As in “I’m working late, so mammal pick you up tonight.”
  • *tail: Dolphins have a “tail”, and it’s sort of takes up half their body, so if you’re stretching for an extra dolphin pun, words containing tail like entail, detail, retail and cocktail may just get you over the line.
  • Fluke: The two “lobes” which make up a dolphin’s tail are called “flukes”, and a “fluke” in regular usage is an unlikely and surprising occurrence of a good thing.
  • Flip her → Flipper: As in “Don’t you dare flipper off! That’s rude!” and “We’re going to need to flipper on her belly before the surgery.”
  • Calf: A young dolphin is called a “calf“, and this word can also refer to the calf muscle which can be used to make a pun.
  • Bull: A male dolphin is called a “bull”, and this word has several other meanings which can be used to make a pun. For example: “That’s a load of bull” and “Yeah, he’s a bit of a bully.”
  • Cow: A female dolphin is called a “cow“, and this word has several other meanings which can be used to make a pun (For example, it can mean “to intimidate”).
  • Spout: The blowhole from which dolphin breathe is often called a “spout“, and so with the right context we can make a pun of it using one of the other definitions: “Oh will you stop spouting your nonsense please.”
  • Bottle: The bottle-nosed dolphin may be famous enough to simple use “bottle” as a dolphin pun in the right context. “Bottle” has many definition, as in: “Can you please fill my bottle?” and “He tried to bottle me over the head!” and “We need to bottle all this juice by sundown.”
  • *cy → *sea: If a word ends in “cy” it’s an easy “sea” pun: polisea, agensea, democrasea, currensea, emergensea, efficiensea, tendensea, frequensea, fansea, constituensea, pregnansea, accurasea, redundansea, bureaucrasea, presidensea, legasea, conspirasea, mersea, privasea, bankruptsea, consistensea, literasea, urgensea, deficiensea, dependency, consultansea, tenacity, isea (icy), secrecy, intimasea. See ocean puns entry for more.
  • Se* → Sea*: Some words that start with just “se” also have a “sea”-ish sound: seacret, searious, seargeant, seacretion, seacure, seacurity, seacondary, seacretariat, seaconds, seacrete, searum, searenity, searvitude. See ocean puns entry for more.
  • Sea*: Most words starting with “sea” are easy sea puns: season, seasonal, seated, searingly, sealants, seam. See ocean puns entry for more.
  • See* → Sea*: If a word starts with “see” it can often be replaced with “sea” to create a simple sea pun: seaminly, seads, seaker, seathe, seap, seak, sean, sea (see). See ocean puns entry for more.
  • *ways → *waves: Words than end in “ways” can be made into bad wave puns: alwaves (always), railwaves (railways), sidewaves, pathwaves, lengthwaves, doorwaves.
  • Bubbly: “bubbly” has a “this water is bubbly” sense and a “he has a really bubbly personality” sense.
  • What an animal → Water animal: As in “Water animal you’ve become.”
  • Grampa’s → Grampus: A “grampus” refers to a cetacean (a group that includes whales, dolphins and porpoises) of the dolphin family, in particular, and especially to an orca or a “Risso’s dolphin”.
  • Dive: As in “The stock market took a dive today.” and “I tried to dive for the ball to intercept it.” and “This relationship has really taken a dive lately.”
  • Heard this → Herd fish: As in “I herd fish guy calling my name.” and “I over-herd fish really bad pun the other day.” For context, dolphins often hunt together in groups by “herding” fish into a ball and then taking turns to swim through the ball and get a mouth full.

Dolphin-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to dolphins can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the dolphin themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • Going swimmingly
  • A drop in the ocean
  • A sea change
  • Swimming along nicely
  • Like a fish out of water
  • Plenty of fish in the sea
  • Something fishy about that
  • Bigger fish to fry
  • We’re short on phrases for this entry, please help improve Punpedia by posting suggestions in the comments! 🙂

Dolphin-Related Words

There are always more puns to be invented! Here’s a list of dolphin-related words to help you out. If you come up with any new dolphin puns, please share them in the comments!

porpoise, bottle-nose, river dolphin, cetacea, cetacean, mammal, saltwater, ocean, sea, beach, jump, jumped, blowhole, flipper, fin, echolocation, sonar, click, clicking, whistle, marine, grampus, calf, dive, splash, flip, bubble, bubbles, herd fish, spin, playful, aquatic, marine, dorsal, leaping, orca, killer whale, fish

Got more dolphin-related words? Please help improve Punpedia by posting them in the comments!

Dolphin Jokes

If you’re looking for extremely corny dolphin jokes, then you’ve come to the right place. All of these jokes rely on some sort of pun for their punchline. Tap or hover on the back rectangle to show the answer.

  • How does a group of dolphins decide on something? – They flipper coin!
  • How did they know the dolphin attack was no accident? – Because dolphins do everything on Porpoise.
  • What did the baby dolphin do when he didn’t get his way? – She whale-d
  • What is a dolphin’s favorite TV show? – Whale of fortune!
  • What birthday party game do dolphin like to play? – Salmon says!
  • Why don’t dolphin do well on school tests? – Because they work below C-Level.
  • What is the most important vitamin in a dolphin’s diet? – Vitamin Sea!
  • Where do dolphin races end? – At dolphinish line!
  • How do dolphin’s say the word “finish”? – Fin. (The french word for “finish”)
  • What’s a dolphin’s favourite sport? – Golphin’
  • What did the mommy dolphin do when her son was an hour late for dinner? – She flipped!

Dolphin Pun Images

We’ve scrummaged through the internet and managed to gather together all the visual dolphin puns (memes, comics, etc.) that we could. If you’ve made or found any more, please share a link to it in the comments!

Did this Punpedia article help you?

All stocked up on dolphin puns? Or maybe you’re looking for something more specific that wasn’t in this entry? More dolphin jokes? More visual puns? A bigger list of dolphin puns that you can use in conversation? Whatever the case, please let us know in the comments! One of our curators or a member of the Punpedia community will do their best to help you out. And as always, if you have any dolphin puns that we don’t, please share them with us in the comments! Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂

Whale Puns

This Punpedia entry is about whale puns! There are also entries on dolphin puns, ocean puns and beach puns if you’re interested in those. Word play around the topic of whales is quite common on the internet, partly due do the versatility of the word “whale” itself as a pun (while, well, will, …), but perhaps mostly because people just love whales. Also, note that orcas (killer whales) are part of the dolphin family, but they’re included in this entry too.

If you’re looking for visual whale puns (including meme-type images), scroll down towards the end of this article. And as usual, if you’ve got any whale puns that are missing from this entry, please share them in the comments at the end of the page!

Whale Puns List

Each of the items below is either a single word-swap type pun, a general rule for creating whale puns.

  • Well → Whale: As in “I hope you and your family are whale.” and “Whale, whale, whale, what do we have here.”
  • Wel* → Whale*: If a word begins with “wel” we can usually replace it with “whale”: whalecome (welcome), whalefare (welfare), whalesh (welsh), whaleding (welding), whaleterweight (welterweight), whaleness (wellness), whale-heeled (well-helled), whaled (weld), whalefarist (welfarist).
  • *wel → *whale: If “wel” occurs at the end of a word we can generally make a whale pun out of it (though some words work better than others): disembowhale (disembowel), towhale (towel), bowhale (bowel), jewhale (jewel), bejewhale (bejewel). Variations on these like disembowhalement, can of course be created.
  • While → Whale: As in “It’s been a whale since we last saw each other.” and “Strike whale the iron is hot.” and “All the whale, he just sat there.”
  • *while → *whale: If a word ends in “while” we can usually replace it with “whale”: meanwhale (meanwhile), worthwhale (worthwhile).
  •  Welp! → Whalep!: As in “Whalep! It’s time for me to go now.”
  • Wail → Whale: As in “The poor man is whaling over his dead husband.” and “He’s whaling because he’s scared.”.
  • Wile → Whale: As in “Don’t underestimate the whale of this person.” The word “wile” essentially means devious/cunning artfulness for manipulating others.
  • We’ll → Whale: As in “Don’t call us, whale call you” and “Sorry, I’ve got to go, whale have to catch up again soon.”
  • Now I’ll → Narwhal: As in “Narwal have to think of another one.” and “And narwhal finish by telling my best whale pun ever.”
  • Now we’ll → Narwhal: As in “And narwhal take a minute to thank our sponsors.”
  • *w I’ll → *w whale: As in “Tomorrow whale start on a plant-based diet.” and “Don’t test me, you know whale do it!” and here’s a big list: know whale (know I’ll), new whale (new I’ll), now whale (now I’ll), how whale (how I’ll), show whale (show I’ll), view whale, follow whale, low whale, allow whale, window whale, few whale, narrow whale, blow whale, throw whale. Here’s a list of words ending in ‘w’ so you can invent your own.
  • *ual → *uwhale: If “ual” occurs at the end of a word, then the “al” can often be replaced with “whale”: individuwhale (individual), annuwhale (annual), equwhale (equal), sexuwhale, actuwhale, usuwhale, intellectuwhale, usuwhale, manuwhale, casuwhale, visuwhale, rituwhale, spirituwhale, mutuwhale, homosexuwhale, duwhale (dual), graduwhale, eventuwhale, conceptuwhale, virtuwhale, contractuwhale, residuwhale, factuwhale, continuwhale, hetersexuwhale, perpetuwhale, contextuwhale, textuwhale, habituwhale, perceptuwhale, sensuwhale, bilinguwhale, consensuwhale, punctuwhale, instinctuwhale, transexsuwhale, menstruwhale, audiovisuwhale, bisexuwhale, asexuwhale.
  • *ual* → *uwhale*: If a word contains “ual”, we can often switch “al” it out for “whale”: actuwhaleity, disquwhaleification, equwhaleity, homosexuwhaleity, quwhalitative, spirituwhaleity.
  • Fuel → Fuwhale: As in “We’ve run out of fuwhale.”
  • Cruel → Cruwhale: As in “That’s a bit cruwhale.”
  • Whirl → Whale: As in “Start the engine and take it for a whale.”
  • Way I’ll → Whale:  As in “There’s no whale come with you.” and “If there’s a whale find it.”.
  • Way all → Whale: As in “There’s no whale this food is free?!”
  • Orchestra → Orcastra: As in “It was a small orcastra, but it was nice.” and of course conjugations like orcastratration, orcastrator and orcastrate can also be made.
  • Orwellian → Orwhaleian: As in “It’s like some sort of Orwhaleian distopia.”
  • Walden → Whaleden: As in “I just finished reading Moby Dick and Whaleden – both great books.”
  • *way → *whale: If a word ends in “way” we can usually create a terrible whale pun by replacing it with “whale”. For example: “It took my breath awhale.” and “We’re halfwhale there!” and here’s some more without example sentences: railwhale (railway), doorwhale (doorway), highwhale, airwhale, underwhale, waterwhale, subwhale, hideawhale, stairwhale.
  • Renewal → Renewhale: As in “Membership renewhale fees are due in January.”
  • Twelve → Twhaleve: As in “Oh gosh, look at the time, it’s twhaleve o’clock, I got to go.”
  • Wallace → Whaleace: As in “William Whaleace was a Scottish hero.”
  • Walrus → Whalerus: As in “In what context would the pun ‘whalerus‘ be useful?”
  • Walnuts → Whalenuts: As in “When will we be able to harvest the whalenuts?”
  • Whilst → Whalest: As in “Quit whalest you’re ahead.”
  • Wallpaper → Whalepaper: As in “What pattern should I choose for my bedroom whalepaper?”
  • Waltz → Whaletz: As in “Here’s my partner, just in time for the whaletz.”
  • Wilderness → Whalederness: As in “There’s something relaxing about the whalederness“.
  • Purpose → Porpoise: As in “I didn’t do it on porpoise!” and “They porpoisefully moved toward me.”
  • Killer: Orca‘s are also known as killer whales, so you can slip “killer” into a sentence for a subtle pun: “These jokes are just killer!” and “Oh wow, that was a killer whale pun.”
  • Killer → Kriller: As in “And that’s when the kriller whale attacked me.” and “The kriller premeditated the murder.”
  • Fan* → Fin*: “fan” can sometimes be replaced with “fin” at the start of words to create fin puns: fintastic (fantastic), finciful (fanciful), finfare (fanfare), fintasy, findom, finciful.
  • Fine/Fin./Find/Fun → Fin: The word “fin” can be used to replace many small words than have both ‘f’ and ‘n’ like “fun” and “find”. The term “fin” also a French word meaning “finish”, and so is sometimes seen at the end of old films and books.
  • *fin*: If a word contains “fin”, it’s an easy whale pun: affinity, coffin, definitive, definitively, finch, finesse, finishfinished, finnish, finland, infinity, infinitesimal.
  • Mum will / Mum’ll → Mammal: As in “I’m working late, so mammal pick you up tonight.”
  • While her → Whaler: As in “We quickly sneaked away whaler parents weren’t looking.”
  • Fluke: The two “lobes” which make up a dolphin’s tail are called “flukes”, and a “fluke” in regular usage is an unlikely and surprising occurrence of a good thing.
  • Flip her → Flipper: As in “Don’t you dare flip her off! That’s rude!” and “We’re going to need to flip her on her belly before the surgery.”
  • While I → Whaler: As in “See just watched whaler was taken away.”
  • Her man → Herman: A subtle pun for a literary audience. Herman Melville wrote a very famous whaling novel called “Moby Dick”. Example sentence: “Don’t talk to her like that, Herman will beat you up.”
  • Cry → Blubber: “blubber” can refer to either the fat of sea mammals, or to sob noisily and uncontrollably.
  • Right, well → Right whale: A “right whale” is a common member of the baleen whale family. Example sentence: “Right whale I’ve got to go now, but ti was nice to chat.”
  • Pilot: A “pilot whale” is a well known species of whale, and “pilot” can obviously refer to the person who controls an aircraft.
  • Grampa’s → Grampus: A “grampus” refers to a cetacean (a group that includes whales, dolphins and porpoises) of the dolphin family, in particular, and especially to a killer whale (which is a dolphin) or a “Risso’s dolphin”.
  • Dive: As in “The stock market took a dive today.” and “I tried to dive for the ball to intercept it.” and “This relationship has really taken a dive lately.”
  • Migratory: Many whale species are famous for their extremely long annual migrations. So “migration” and “migratory“, used in a non-whale fashion can be a subtle pun.
  • Hot-blooded → Warm-blooded: The term “hot-blooded” (of Shakespearean origin) means to have a passionate nature or be inclined to a quick temper. Whales are well known for being one of the very few species in the sea that are warm-blooded. Thus, if you use “warm-blooded” in place of “hot-blooded” when describing someone with a quick temper, then, in the right contexts, you’ve got yourself a subtle whale pun.
  • *s on our → Sonar: If a word ends in “s” and is followed by “on our” then we can play on the word “sonar” (some whales use echolocation, or sonar, to help them “see”). Examples: “I strongly condemn any attacks sonar people.” and “Yep, it’s sonar webpage.”
  • Breach: As in “Captain, the whale army has breached our security.” In case you didn’t know, when a whale jumps out of the water it’s called “breaching“.
  • Calf: A young whale is called a “calf“, and this word can also refer to the calf muscle which can be used to make a pun.
  • Bull: A male whale is called a “bull”, and this word has several other meanings which can be used to make a pun. For example: “That’s a load of bull” and “Yeah, he’s a bit of a bully.”
  • Cow: A female whale is called a “cow“, and this word has several other meanings which can be used to make a pun (For example, it can mean “to intimidate”).
  • Spout: The blowhole from which whales breathe is often called a “spout“, and so with the right context we can make a pun of it using one of the other definitions: “Oh will you stop spouting your nonsense please.”
  • Bubbly: “bubbly” has a “this water is bubbly” sense and a “he has a really bubbly personality” sense.
  • Way all → Whale: As in “It’s strange the whale these people are dressed the same.”

Whale-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to whales can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the whale themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • Lay there like a beached whale
  • A sea change
  • A whale of a time
  • As big as a whale
  • Between the devil and the deep blue sea
  • Happy slapping
  • A drop in the ocean
  • Don’t have a cow
  • Like a bull in a China shop
  • Holy cow
  • Blowing one’s own horn
  • Make like the wind and blow out of here
  • Mickey finn
  • Not able to make head or tail of it
  • Old blowhard
  • Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more
  • A sacred cow
  • Seize the bull by the horns
  • Until the cows come home

Whale-Related Words

Here’s a bunch of whale-related words that you can use to invent you own whale puns. If you come up with anything, please share it with us in the comments at the end of this entry!

porpoise, sperm whale, killer whale, orca, flipper, fin, free willy, blowhole, blow, blower, mammal, plankton, krill, humpback, cetacean, cetacea, cetaceous, blue whale, narwhal, baleen, whaler, whaling, harpoon, gray whale, beluga, beached, breaching, blubber, moby dick, herman melville, whale watching, pilot whale, dorsal fin, migratory, carcass, sea, ocean, saltwater, right whale, pelargic, warm blooded, marine, open water, pinniped, sonar, spermaceti, ambergris, cachalot, leviathan, bowhead, flense, calf, breach, spout, bull, fluke, minke whale, grampus, spout hole, tail fin, splash, razorback, slap, whale louse, whalebone, rorqual, spiracle, spray, blackfish, piked whale, blubber oil, dwarf minke whale, fail whale, beaked whale, cetology, cow, aquatic mammal, balaenidae, big, massive, huge, bubbles, pod, mysis, barnacle, equatorial, behemoth, bristles, buoyancy, cavort, cavorting, endangered, enormous, gulp, greenpeace, lunge feeding, ram feeding, milk, migration, rotting, slapping, tail, shamu, comb

Whale Jokes

If you’re looking for short, corny whale jokes with punchlines that are puns, then you’re at the right place. Have you got a cheesy whale joke that we don’t? Please share it with us in the comments!

  • Where do you calculate the mass of a cetacean? – At a whale-weigh station!
  • What is a whale’s favourite story? – The Humpback of Notre Dame
  • What is an orca’s favourite TV show? – Whale of fortune!
  • What do you call a 100 year old whale? – A hunchback whale.
  • What do whales like to chew? – Blubber gum!
  • What kind of whale flies? – A pilot whale!
  • Why are they called sperm whales? – Because seamen discovered them.
  • Why was the whale so sad? – Because she was a Blue whale.
  • Have you ever seen a fish cry? – No, but I have seen a whale blubber.
  • What do you call a pod of musical whales? – An Orcastra.
  • How does a group of whales make a decision? – Flipper coin!
  • What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film? – Licence to Krill
  • Where does a killer whale go for braces? – The orca-dontist

Whale Pun Images

Here’s a bunch of visual whale puns that we’ve managed to find. Have you found or made a good/terrible whale pun image? Please share a link to it in the comments! 🙂

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you get what you came for? If so, great! If not, please tell us what you’re looking for in the comments below! Are you looking for more visual whale puns, like memes and comics? Would you like to see more jokes about whales?  Or maybe you’d just like more puns that you can use in conversation? Whatever the case, please let us know in the comments and we’ll do out best to help you out. We’d also love to hear from you in the comments if you’ve made or found a whale pun (visual or text) that isn’t in this entry. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂

Boat Puns

This Punpedia entry is about boat puns! Whether you’re looking for a boat name, halfway through a pun battle, or just training your nautical wordplay muscles, we hope you find this entry useful! As usual, if you’re looking for visual puns (images, memes, etc.), scroll down to the bottom of this entry.

The boating and nautical area of  word play has a strong history, perhaps mostly because of the tradition of naming a boat or ship with a pun. On top of this, there are so many sub-categories of boat word play: sailing puns, anchor puns, rowing puns, naval puns, ship puns, fishing puns, and it even has a decent overlap with the infamous ocean puns category – one of the more popular categories of puns. So in this Punpedia entry we’ve done our best to create and collect as many examples of maritime word play as we could. If you’ve got a nautical pun that we’re missing, please submit it in the comments at the bottom of this page!

Also check out these related articles: fish puns, beach puns, whale puns, dolphin puns and shark puns.

Boat Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any boat related puns that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here is a big list of boat puns:

  • Encourage → Anchorage: As in “Stop anchoraging him!”.
  • Not → Knot: As in “Tell me this is knot happening.” and “Knot on my watch.”
  • Not → Naut: As in “Last but naut least” and “Fear naut!”
  • Boat → But: As in “Last boat not least” and “Close, boat no cigar.”
  • Saboteur → Saboateur : As in “Captain, I believe there’s a saboateur on our ship.”
  • Boat: As in, “Don’t rock the boat,” and “In the same boat,” and “Missed the boat,” and “Whatever floats your boat,” and “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.” Notes: to rock the boat is to say something that will upset the people around you. If you need a bigger boat, then you’ve underestimated the situation you’re in. 
  • Butt → Boat: As in, “Kick boat,” and “Kiss my boat,” and “Pain in the boat,” and “My boat is on the line,” and “Boat-terflies in my stomach.” 
  • Bowtie → Boat-tie: As in, “My boat-tie is too tight.” 
  • Beaut* → Boat*: As in, “Boat-iful people,” and “Boat-y mark,” and “I need my boat-y sleep,” and “Make boat-iful music together,” and “Boat-y is in the eye of the beholder,” and “Boat-y is only skin-deep.”
  • Reckon → Wrecken: As in “Do you wrecken we’ll make it through the storm?” and “I am a force to be wreckened with.”
  • Wreck: The word “wreck” has a few meanings other than shipwreck, including slang ones (like “Ohhh rekt!” and “He’s an emotional wreck.”) and the regular, formal ones (Like “My wedding was wrecked by the storm”).
  • Wife → Wharf: As in “My wharf likes our new boat.” and “What does your wharf think?”.
  • Very → Ferry: As in “That was a ferry impressive boat pun.”
  • *very* → *ferry*: If a word contains “very” it can be a boat pun: eferry (every), eferrything (everything), deliferry, discoferry, eferryday, eferrywhere, braferry, slaferry, thieferry.
  • Furry → Ferry: As in, “A ferry toy,” and “My legs are looking a bit ferry.”
  • Fairy → Ferry: As in, “Airy ferry,” and “A ferrytale ending,” and “Nobody loves a ferry when she’s forty.”
  • Vary → Ferry: As in, “Results may ferry,” and “Your mileage may ferry.” Note: Your mileage may vary is an expression indicating that something that works for one may not work for another. Is commonly shortened to YMMV. 
  • *fer → *ferry: As in, deferry (defer), conferry (confer), inferry (infer), referry (refer), offerry (offer), transferry (transfer), bufferry (buffer), preferry (prefer). 
  • Nefarious → Neferryous: As in, “A neferryous villain.”
  • Indecency → In decent sea: As in “The flagrant in decent sea of these images!”
  • Carved → Craft: As in “She’s craft out a nice little niche for herself.”
  • Of course → Off course: As in “Off course I like being the navigator!”
  • Wake: The “wake” is the trail of disturbed water left by a boat. Example sentences: “Wake up!” and “I’ve been awake for days.”
  • Shit → Ship: As in “Oh ship, we’re in trouble now.”
  • Boy → Buoy: As in “Oh buoy, I can’t wait.” and “Good morning, buoys and girls.”
  • Most → Mast: As in “This is mast amusing!” and “Mast boats have a sail.”
  • Must → Mast: As in “We mast sail towards that island!” and “We mastn’t get too confident”.
  • Mas* → Mast*: Sometimes a word that begins with “mas” can be made into a boat pun by a replacement of “mas” with “mast”: mastacre (massacre), mastculinity, mastonry, mastochistic, mastquerading, mastage (massage). Obviously we can also make puns when a word starts with “mast”: master, masterpiece, masterminding.
  • Grief → Greef: As in “Good greef!” and “He was overtaken by greef.”.
  • Naughty → Knotty: As in “He’s a very knotty boy!” and “Knotty or nice?”.
  • Scenic → Seanic: As in “Let’s take the seanic route.”
  • Sooner → Schooner: As in “Schooner or later.” and “I’ll call her schoon“. A “schooner” is a sailing ship with two or more masts.
  • Doc*→ Dock*: If a word begins with “doc”, it can often be switched with “dock”: docktor, dockument, dockumentation, docktrine, docktorate, dockumentary.
  • Clue → Crew: As in “I havn’t got a crew.”
  • Sel* → Sail*: If a word starts with “sel” a boat pun can often be made by replacing it with “sail”: sailection (selection), sailect (select), sailf (self), sailling (selling), sail (sell), saildom (seldom), sailfish (selfish), sailfless (selfless), sailective (selective).
  • Aphrodisiac → Aquadisiac: As in “I heard that water is actually an aquadisiac.”
  • Alchoholic → Aquaholic: As in “I’ve been an aquaholic for 5 years now.”
  • Sure → Shore: As in “Are you shore?” and “She shore is strong!”.
  • Barge: As in “You can’t just barge in here like that!”
  • How → Scow: A “scow” is a type of flat-bottomed sailing boat. As in “Scow could you do this to me?!”
  • Are c* → Ark: If a word starting with “c” follows the word “are”, then a play on “ark” can be created. For example: “Many ark called but few are chosen” and “Most people aren’t happy unless they ark complaining.”
  • *tag* → *tug*: If a word contains “tag” we can sometimes switch it with “tug” (short for tugboat): antugonistic (antagonistic), pentugon, stugnate, tugalong (tagalong).
  • Really → Reely: As in “This is a reely good boat pun” and “I’m having a reely good day on my boat!”.
  • Re* →Reel*: Most words starting with “re” can be made into fishing puns: reelationship, reelease, reelate, reelief, reeligion, reelative, reelevant, reelax, reeluctant, reeliable,, reeliability, reelieved, reeliance, reelay, reelapse, reelinquish, reeligation, reelive, reelentlessly.
  • What are → Water: “Water you doing out so late tonight?” and “Water you doing tomorrow?”
  • What are we → Watery: As in “Watery going to do?” and “Watery doing today, friends?”
  • Whatever → Waterever: As in “Waterever, I don’t care.” and “Do waterever you want”.
  • What her → Water: As in “I know water problem is.” and “Do you know water mother thinks about this?”.
  • What do → Water: As in “Water you think about this?”
  • What about → Water boat: As in “Water boat we have tofu curry for dinner tonight?” and “Water boat Ching? Does she want to come to the beach too?”
  • *pear → *peir: As in “Then all of a sudden she dissapiered!” and “After appiering to check his watch, he quickly ran away.” and “That is a sharp spier you’ve got there”.
  • Confiscate → Conch-fish-scate: As in “I’m going to have to conchfishcate your pun licence for that one.” See the entry on fish puns for more.
  • Row/Roe: “Row” as in “row your boat” and “roe” as in fish or shellfish eggs, are two words that can be inserted into many other words: roetine/rowtine (routine), rowmans/roemans (romans), rowtation/roetation (rotation), rowd/roed (rowed), rowse (rose), rowl (roll), rowp, rowmantic, rowbust, rowbot, rowgue, roest.
  • *row: If a word ends in “row” it’s an easy rowing pun: grow, throw, narrow, tomorrow, borrow, arrow, eyebrow, sorrow, overthrow, barrow, burrow, crow, harrow, marrow, sparrow, furrow, wheelbarrow, scarecrow, farrow, outgrow. Variations of these like growing, borrowing, sorrowful, etc. also work.
  • Kill → Keel: As in “We can be healthy with plants, keeling animals is not necessary.”
  • Skull → Scull: As in “If you could get it into your thick scull!” A scull is a small oar.
  • Flag: As in “We should flag that comment as inappropriate.”
  • Punned → Punt: A “punt” is a type of long, narrow, flat-bottomed boat, so this is a lovely self-referential boat pun about punning: “I’ve punt about boats for long enough.”
  • *kily → *keely: Words containing “kil” can often be turned into boat puns: luckeely, huskeely, shakeely, silkeely, cheekeely, jerkeely, sneakeely, spookeely, freakeely.
  • Kil* → Keel*: Words starting with “kil” can be made into boat puns: keelogram, keelolitres, keeln (kiln), keeling, keeler, keelt (kilt), keeljoy.
  • Something → Somefin: As in “There’s somefin about the way he walks” and “Is that a shark, or somefin else?”.
  • Nothing → Nofin: As in “Nofin is better than swimming with dolphins” and “I’ve got nofin left to give!”.
  • Debate → Debait: As in “I don’t want to debait you.” and “Well, that’s debaitable“.
  • Summon → Salmon: As in “He salmoned a spirit from the underworld.” and “Please salmon the duke, I have an urgent message!”.
  • Someone → Salmon: As in “Will salmon please help me?” and “Salmon’s at the door”.
  • Crea* → Cray*: Many words that begin with “crea” can be used to make shoddy crayfish puns. For example: crayture (creature), craytive (creative), crayte (create).
  • Crayon: The word “crayon” includes “cray” – the short version of “crayfish”, and so can be used as a pun.
  • Slope → sloop: A “sloop” is a type of sailboat with one mast. Example sentence: “Hold on! This is a steep sloop.”
  • *sk if → As skiff: If the word “if” follows a word that ends in “sk” then we can create a play on “skiff” (a type of shallow, flat-bottomed boat). Example sentences: “Before giving it to her, askiff she wants it.” and “We’ll be back by duskiff we can fix this motor.” Many more words fit this pattern: riskiff (risk if), deskiff (desk if), taskiff (task if), diskiff, maskiff, briskiff, flaskiff, kioskiff, baskiff, whiskif, muskiff.
  • *s if → As skiff: If the word “if” follows a word that ends in “s” then we can create a play on “skiff” (a type of shallow, flat-bottomed boat). Example sentences: “As skiff!” and “You sound as skiff you’re a bit sick?” and “Ask us skiff you need anything!” There are obviously thousands of words ending in “s” so you can create your own puns using this formula with the help of a list like this.
  • Y’all → Yawl: As in “How are yawl doing today?” A yawl is a type of sailboat.
  • *sib* → *ship*: If a word contains “sib” it can usually be replaced with “ship” to create a terrible pun. For example: posshiply (possibly), accesshipility (accessibility), incomprehenshiple, feashipble, irresponshipble, invishipble, ostenshipbly, revershipble, vishipble. An example sentence might be: “I am responshiple for my puns.”
  • Like → lake: As in “Swim lake a fish.” and “Lake a fish out of water.”
  • *sip* → *ship*: If a word contains “sip” it can usually be replaced with “ship”. For example: gosship (gossip), dishipate (dissipate), shipping (sipping), inshipid (insipid).
  • Purpose → Porpoise: As in “I didn’t do it on porpoise!” and “She porpoisely ran the ship aground.”
  • Trolling → Trawling: As in “Haha, naa I’m just trawling.” and “Not sure if he’s an internet trawl.” Trawling is a method of fishing.
  • San* → Sand*: Replacing “san” with “sand” when it is at the start of a word give some nice corny puns: sanditary (sanitary), sandctioned (sanctioned), sandctuary (sanctuary), sandguine (sanguine), sandctions (sanctions). Note: sanguine has two meanings: being optimistic or positive in the face of a difficult situation, and a reddish-brown colour.
  • Bereft → Bereeft: “bereft of” means “deprived of” of “lacking”. So an example sentence might be: “The old, stark beach house of bereefed of colour”.
  • Or → Oar: As in “Let’s go oar we’ll be late!” and “Should we swim oar keep sunbaking?”.
  • Or* → Oar*: If a word starts with “or” it can be replaced with “oar” for a neat little boat pun. Some examples: oarganisation, oariginally, oarange, oarchestra, oargan, oarbit, oarnament, oarthodoxy, oariental, oarnaments, oarchid, oardering.
  • Awe → Oar: As in “It was truly oar-inspiring.”
  • Aw* → Oar*: If a word starts with “aw” it can sometimes be made into an oar pun: oarsome (awesome), oar-wareness (awareness), oarful (aweful), oar-waited (awaited), oarkward (awkward), oar-ware (aware), oar-wakened (awakened), oary (awry).
  • Sea*: Most words starting with “sea” are easy sea puns: season, seasonal, seated, searingly, sealants, seam, seatbelt.
  • Seizure → Seazure: As in “If I read one more ocean pun I’m going to have a seazure.”
  • See* → Sea*: If a word starts with “see” it can often be replaced with “sea” to create a simple sea pun: seaminly, seads, seaker, seathe, seap, seak, sean, sea (see).
  • Sealant / Sealing / Seal: Easy seal puns can be made with words starting with “seal” (e.g. sealant, seal) or “ceil” (e.g. sealing).
  • Se* → Sea*: Some words that start with just “se” also have a “sea”-ish sound: seacret, searious, seargeant, seacretion, seacure, seacurity, seacondary, seacretariat, seaconds, seacrete, searum, searenity, searvitude, seanile, seadation, seaclusion, seacretive, seaze, seaquential, sealection, seacretly, seaquences, seanior, seaniority, seagregate, seaping, seacession, seariousness, seaminars, seaveral, seaxual, seaparation, seantimental, seansational, seaquential, seacluded, seacularist, seathing, seaquin, seasame, seaclusion.
  • *cy → *sea: If a word ends in “cy” it’s an easy “sea” pun: polisea, agensea, democrasea, currensea, emergensea, efficiensea, tendensea, frequensea, fansea, constituensea, pregnansea, accurasea, redundansea, bureaucrasea, presidensea, legasea, conspirasea, mersea, privasea, bankruptsea, consistensea, literasea, urgensea, deficiensea, dependency, consultansea, tenacity, isea (icy), secresea, intimasea.
  • Se*cy/Ce*cy → Sea*sea: Most words that start with “se” or “ce” and end with “cy” can be double sea puns: seacresea (secrecy), sealibasea (celibacy).
  • Should* → Shoald*: A “shoal” can refer to a large group of fish, or an area of shallow water, or an underwater sand bank. We can use “shoal” be used to make puns like: shoald (should), shoalder (shoulder), shoaldering.
  • Show l* → Shoal: This is a subtle one because it involves a word break. Whenever you use the word “show”, and the following word starts with an “L”, then you can replace “show” with “shoal” (a shoal is a large school of fish). For example: “That’s cool! You should shoal Liam.” and “She laughs when we shoal little blue flowers to her.”.
  • *tual* → *shoal*: As mentioned above, A “shoal” can refer to a large group of fish, or an area of shallow water, or an underwater sand bank. If a word contains “tual” it can often be replaced with “shoal” for a cute little pun: actshoal (actual), actshoality (actuality), intellectshoal (intellectual), ritshoal (ritual), spiritshoal, mutshoally, eventshoal, eventshoally, conceptshoal, conceptshoalise, virtshoal, contractshoal, factshoal, factshoally, perpetshoal, textshoal, contextshoal, perceptshoal, punctshoal, instinctshoal, actshoally, habitshoally.
  • *sole → *shoal: As in “The shoal of my shoe is worn down.” and “Your new gaming conshoal is cool.” and “Yeah, he’s a bit of an asshoal.”
  • Defin* → Dolphin: As in “We dolphinitely need more time to finish the mission.” and “What is the dolphinition of this word?” and “Please dolphine this word.” and “It’s the dolphinitive source of Nordic history.”
  • Endorphines → Endolphins: As in “I love that rush of endolphins you get after a good hard swimming session.”
  • Bae → Bay: As in “Bay! Please stop with the beach puns, you’re embarrassing me.”
  • Combine → Combrine: As in “With our power combrined we should be able to defeat them.” and “It’s what you get when you combrine salt and water”. Similar puns can be made for most words ending in “bine”: turbrine (turbine), concubrine (concubine), columbrine (columbine).
  • Specific → Pacific: As in “You need to be more pacific.” and “Are you sure you have the pacifications for this?” and “Pacifically, there are two apples and three nectarines”.
  • Wish → Fish: As in “I just fish we had more time!” and “If you rub the lamp you get three fishes“. See the entry on fish puns for more.
  • Stark → Shark: As in “The shark contrast between his and his boyfriend’s attire was intriguing.” and “The old, shark house stood looming above us”.
  • *ways → *waves: Words than end in “ways” can be made into bad wave puns: alwaves (always), railwaves (railways), sidewaves, pathwaves, lengthwaves, doorwaves.
  • Title → Tidal: As in “I like it, but I’m not sure on the tidal” and “Use ‘Ms.’ as her tidal” and “The championship tidal match is tomorrow morning.”
  • Acquaintance → Aquaintance: As in “I don’t know her well, she’s just an aquaintance“.
  • Naughty → Nauty: As in “There’s that nauty sailor again”.
  • Tied → Tide: As in “I’m tide up at the moment, can someone else help?” and “Yep, they tide the knot!”
  • Tidy → Tidey: As in “After the party we need to tidey the beach.”
  • Gullible → Seagullible: As in “Kyani is so seagullible!”
  • Crazy → Cray-sea: As in “He is so craysea!” and “Enough of this crayseaness!”. Hyphen is, of course, optional.
  • Turn → Tern: A “tern” is a sea bird similar to a seagull, but smaller and with a forked tail.
  • About/Abode → Aboat: As in “What aboat the captain?” and “Welcome to my aboat!”
  • Big/Large/Massive → Titanic: Replace adjectives which mean “big” with “titanic“.
  • Fission → Fishin’: As in “Nuclear fishin’ is an exciting new technology.” See the entry on fish puns for more.
  • Birth → Berth: A “berth” is a ship’s allotted place at a dock or wharf. Examples: “Lucky I was using berth control!” and “Nothing but my berthday suit!”
  • Fathom: A “fathom” is a unit of length equal to 6 feet (~1.8m) and is most commonly used in reference to the depth of water. Example sentences: “I can’t fathom what she means.” and “It’s completely unfathomable!”
  • Strip → Ship: As in “A weird ship-tease” and “A thin blue ship of metal” and “I’m shipping you of your privileges.”
  • *anker → *anchor: most words ending in “anker” can be anchor puns: banchor (banker), tanchor (tanker), flanchor (flanker), hanchor (flanker), spanchor (flanker), danchor (danker).
  • Rudder →Utter: As in “I’m rudderly embarrassed!” and “Pure, rudder silence.”
  • Properly → Propellorly: As in “Propellorly lame, if you ask me.” and “Finish the job propellorly.”
  • Dinghy → Dingy: A “dinghy” is a small boat and it sounds a bit like the word “dingy” which has multiple slang definitions including “gloomy and drab”.
  • Admirably → Admiralably: As in “You handled that admiralably, son.”
  • Swell: “Swell” has several meanings: “the rolling movement of waves”, “become larger in size” and “excellent/wonderful/fashionable” to name a few. Example sentences: “Dude, that was swell.” and “I can sense his ego swelling as we speak.”
  • Assail: As in “We were assailed by pirates on our way here.” and “This ship is unassailable.”
  • Sale → Sail: As in “There’s a big sail down at the boat store.”
  • *sale* → *sail*: Words containing “sale” can be turned into sailing puns: presail, resail, sailsclerk, sailsperson, wholesail.
  • Exhale → Ex-sail: As in, “Inhale, ex-sail.”
  • *sil*→ *sail*: Words with a “sil” sound can be changed to “sail”: “Imbesail (imbecile),” and “Reconsail (reconcile),” and “Sailence (silence).”
  • Can you → Canoe: As in “I can’t think of any more boat puns. Canoe?”
  • I’m out of → Armada: An “armada” is a fleet of warships. Example sentences: “This is scary! Armada here!” and “Armada boat puns, do you have any?”.
  • You t* → Yacht*: If a word beginning with “t” follows the word “you”, a yacht pun can often be made. For example: “You’ll never know till yachtry.” and “I’m glad I bumped into yachtoday.”
  • Harbour: As in, “Harbour a grudge,” and “Safe harbour.” 
  • Pier: As in, “Take a long walk off a short pier.” 
  • Peer → Pier: As in, “Pier pressure,” and “Pier-ing through the curtains.”
  • Cog*: As in, “Cogito ergo sum,” and “Just another cog in the machine.” Notes: cogito ergo sum is a philosophical expression meaning “I think, therefore I am.” A cog is a type of ship. 
  • Clog → Cog: As in, “Clever cogs,” and “Cog up,” and “Pop your cogs.” Notes: Clever clogs is a disapproving way of saying that someone is clever, but in an irritating way. To pop your clogs is to die. 
  • *cog*: As in, “Cognitive,” and “Cognition,” and “Incognito,” and “Recognise,” and “Recognition.” 
  • Overboard: As in, “Man overboard!” and “This is going overboard.”
  • * port*: As in, “Any port in a storm,” and “Blow out of proportion,” and “The first port of call,” and “A golden opportunity,” and “Land of opportunity,” and “Moral support,” and “What’s more important here?” Note: a port is a commercial facility where ships dock to load and unload cargo. 
  • Maria → Marina: As in “Marina, could you please pass the pepper?”
  • Maureen/Mareen  → Marine: As in “Marine, your name works well as boat pun.”

Boat-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to boats can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the boat themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • A stern talking to
  • Off the hook
  • Boy meets girl (Buoy meets gull)
  • Go to hell (hull)
  • They tied (tide) the knot
  • Batten down the hatches
  • Harboring strong feelings
  • Rock the boat
  • Pleasure craft
  • Hanging about (aboat)
  • All for naught (nautical)
  • Above board
  • As helpful as a screen door on a submarine
  • Throwing the baby out with the bathwater (bilge water)
  • Loose lips sink ships
  • Barge right in
  • Drown your sorrows
  • Drunk as a sailor
  • Fish out of water
  • He’s fishing for compliments
  • Hook, line and sinker,
  • A sea change
  • Knots in one’s stomach
  • Rats abandon a sinking ship
  • Plain sailing
  • She’s not the only fish in the sea
  • Strait and narrow
  • Still waters run deep
  • Take the wind out of his sails
  • Three sheets in the wind
  • Throw caution to the winds
  • To fish in troubled waters
  • Captain of one’s soul
  • Cast your bread upon the waters
  • Come hell or high water
  • Dead in the water
  • Devil and the deep blue sea
  • Different kettle of fish
  • A whale of a good time
  • Dock your pay
  • From sea to shining sea
  • Get your second wind
  • Anchors aweigh
  • Hold at bay
  • Any port in a storm
  • I didn’t come down the clyde in a banana boat
  • In hot water
  • Keep your head above water
  • Know which way the wind blows
  • Like a cork in the ocean
  • May the wind be at your back
  • A fine kettle of fish
  • Sleep with the fishes
  • Sink or swim
  • Something smells fishy
  • Tell that to the marines
  • That’s water under the bridge
  • Up shit creek without a paddle
  • Walk the plank
  • Wind swept hair
  • Water over the dam
  • Water, water everywhere, but not a drop to drink

Boat-Related Words

There are likely hundred more boat puns to be made, and that aren’t included in this Punpedia entry, so here’s a list of boat-related words to help you in your pun authorship process. If you come up with a good one, please share it with us in the comments at the bottom of the page!

ship, canoe, yacht, fathom, wake, marina, pleasure craft, sail, sailboat, watercraft, motorboat, pontoon, barge, tugboat, kayak, lifeboat, scow, longboat, powerboat, rowboat, vessel, ferry, sculler, bumboat, steamboat, ark, gondola, navigation, propellor, tug, submarine, navy, sloop, skiff, dinghy, paddleboat, yawl, boating, boater, paddle, houseboat, schooner, formast, surfboat, boatyard, troller, sailing, freighter, trawler, fisherman, dock, hull, planing, felucca, trimaran, lake, ocean, sea, barque, galleon, trireme, sailor, mainsail, foresail, carrack, rudder, water, topsail, mast, pinnace, cutter, row, punt, mooring, oar, scull, oars, tack, mackinaw, hoy, galley, boatie, boatload, topmast, shipbuilder, jetboat, jibe, lateen, nautical, monohull, cruise ship, plank, deck, poop deck, bow, cannon, motor, fishing, fish, scuba, diving, ahoy, submersible, hovercraft, aboard, board, landing, headsail, aground, captain, flag, cruise, craft, crew, docked, sink, shipwreck, bilge, bilge pump, titanic, pirate, sank, drown, moored, float, buoy, buoyant, buoyancy, warship, deckhand, outboard motor, harpoon, fishing rod, fibreglass, fleet, steamer, stern, tanker, ice-breaker, catamaran, messmate, port, porthole, anchor, rig, knot, bowsprit, container ship, pirate ship, slave trade, naval, wind, wave, waves, battleship, corvette, supertanker, mayflower, stranded, mutiny, peg leg, windlass, flagship, bay, life jacket, Mediterranean, Pacific, quarterdeck, onboard, monsoon, sunken, boarded, coast guard, abandon ship, bail out, piracy, cargo hold, cargo, banana boat, seawater, ocean spray, reef, whale, ocean liner, super liner, seagulls, mainstay, grapnel, davit, cox, crossjack, reel, rod, net, haul, jigger, clip, knots, riding lamp, canal, fishery, sharpie, torpedo, adrift, pier, ballast, cuddy, seamen, dredge, ferrying, marine, coastal, oceanic, Atlantic, gulf, seagoing, seafaring, offshore, seaborne, strait, dhow, frigate, asea, mariner, seafloor, shipping, Carribean, harbor, coastline, cruiser, destroyer, seaworthy, voyage, sweep, square sail, balloon sail, bearing, pintoon, river, skipper, commodore, helmsman, admiral, colonel, shipmaster, circumnavigate, crow’s nest, hydro, hydroplane, anchoring, submerged, cabin, docks, jetski, fish finder, ketch, radar, starboard, port side, astern, inboard, abaft, bulkhead, armada

Boat Jokes

Only the most terrible jokes use puns in their punchline, and so it is with great pleasure that we bring you the most terrible boat jokes!

  • Which type of vegetable is banned on ships? – Leeks!
  • What’s a pirate’s favorite letter? – Aye, you may think it’s the RRRRR, but it’s the C that they’re in love with!
  • What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? – A nervous wreck!
  • When the bottom of a cargo ship got a hole, it had one hull of a problem.
  • The cost of a galvanized hull is enough to zinc a ship.
  • When the captain’s ship ran aground he couldn’t fathom why.
  • What did the ship’s captain say when he got stuck trying to navigate through a narrow channel? – We’re in dire straits!
  • Why is sailing like oil drilling? – They’re both a crewd business!
  • How much did the pirate pay for his piercings? – A buck-an-ear!
  • Why couldn’t the famous pirate sell his ship? – Because it was unassailable.
  • Why did the admiral decide against buying a new hat? – He was worried about cap sizing
  • What’s another name for the captain of a sail boat? – A sails manager!
  • Why is pirating addictive? – Once ye lose yer first hand, ye get hooked!
  • I used to have a fear of boats, but that ship has sailed.
  • Making a boat out of stone would be a hardship.
  • A pirate ship is assailing vessel.
  • I once saw a juggler juggling twenty paddles. It was oar inspiring.
  • Why were cruises cheaper before steam boats were invented?  – Because cruises were always on sail
  • Do you want to keep paddling in circles or not? It’s an either oar situation.
  • I’m not one for buoyancy, but whatever floats your boat.
  • Big sale on rowing paddles at my local shop. It’s quite an oar deal.
  • I refused to live in the same cabin as the captain. This didn’t boat dwell with him.
  • Old sailors never die, they just get a little dinghy.
  • I can’t think of any more boat puns. Canoe?
  • A tanker transporting blue paint collided into another tanker carrying red paint. Both crews were marooned.
  • Why did the admiral decide against buying a new hat? – He was afraid of cap sizing.

Boat Pun Images

Looking for visual boat puns? We’ve got you covered. Here’s some beautiful and terrible puns in image-form. If you find a good one that isn’t included here, or if you create you own, please share it with us by linking in the comments!

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