Pizza Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on pizza puns! 🍕 The most common pizza puns directly involve the word “pizza”, and this entry has its fair share of those, but it also includes a bunch of puns about pizza-related topics. The list is fairly short by Punpedia standards, so if you’ve got one that we’re missing, please post it in the comments at the end!

A quick side note before we begin: I feel obligated to remind readers that (most) pizza is generally a terribly unhealthy food. It’s delicious, but not something people should really be putting in their bodies regularly if they don’t want heart disease to kill them at 50. Healthier wholegrain pizzas with plant-based toppings are becoming more and more common at pizzerias. Go easy on the cheese! 🙂

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on food puns, pie puns, curry puns and cooking puns.

Pizza Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about pizza that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Piece of → Pizza: As in “You want a pizza me?” and “That’s a pizza cake.” and “They all want a pizza the action.” and “That’s a fine pizza ass.” and “That’s a pizza piss.” and “He’s a nasty pizza work.” and “How long is a pizza string?” and “I’ll give him a pizza my mind!” and “You’re a real pizza work.” and “Pizza the pie” and “Abbreviated pizza nothing”
  • Piece of my heart → Pizza my hut
  • Peace of mind → Pizza mind
  • Pete’s sake → Pizzake: As in “For pizzake! Will you two get a room?”
  • Beats are → Pizza: As in “I love your music! These pizza so good.”
  • Beats a → Pizza: As in “It pizza poke in the eye with a sharp stick.” and “It pizza slow and painful death.”
  • Beats around → Pizza-round: As in “He pizza-round the bush and never gets anything accomplished.”
  • Heart → Hut: (A play on Pizza Hut, the international pizzeria franchise) As in “A man after my own hut” and “Absence makes the hut grow fonder” and “Be still my beating hut” and “You broke my hut” and “Cross my hut and hope to die” and “Cry your hut out” and “Eat your hut out” and “Follow your hut” and “Has my best interests at hut” and “From the bottom of my hut” and “Hut and soul” and “Hut warming” and “In my hut of huts” and “I will wear my hut upon my sleeve.” and “Near to one’s hut” and “Steal someone’s hut” and “Take it to hut
  • Had → Hut: As in “I’ve hut it up to here with you!” and “It hut to be seen to be believed.” and “You hut to be there.” and “She hut us in stitches!”
  • Hurt → Hut: As in “Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hut me.” and “What you don’t know can’t hut you.”
  • Trust → Crust: As in “Crust me, I’m a doctor.” and “That was a breach of crust.” and “He’s a crustworthy young man.”
  • Christ → Crust: As in “Crust has fallen, crust has risen.” and “Crust is a main figurehead in western mythology.”
  • Crusty: This term can refer to someone (especially an older person) who is bad-tempered.
  • Rusty → Crusty: As in “My punning skills are a little crusty, sorry.”
  • Just → Crust: As in “It’s crust not my day today.” and “It’s crust around the corner.” and “Crust add water.” and “It’s crust a matter of time.”
  • Cust* → Crust*: If a word begins with “cust”, swap it with “crust”: crustodian, crustomer, crustom, crustomary, crustody, crustard, crustodial, crustomise, crustomarily.
  • *ust* → *crust*: If a word has the “ust”, it can sometimes be made into a pizza crust pun: crustice (justice), crustification (justification), crustachioed (mustachioed), crustainable (sustainable), crustainability (sustainability).
  • Least→ Yeast: As in “Last, but not yeast.” and “Yeast common denominator.” and “It’s the yeast I could do.”
  • East→ Yeast: As in “I’m heading over yeast for a holiday.”
  • Need → Knead: As in “Only on a knead-to-know basis.” and “A friend in knead is a friend indeed.” and “You knead your head examined.”
  • Needy → Kneady: As in “He’s a bit kneady.”
  • Kneed → Knead: As in “He was knead in the chest during his rugby match.”
  • Leaving → Leaven: “Leaven” is another term for “rising agent”: the ingredient added to make pizza dough rise (usually yeast). Examples: “You’re leaven me here all by myself?” and “Oh, you’re leaven so early?!”
  • Money → Dough: The term “dough” is slang for money in some places.
  • Adore → Adough: “I adough you.”
  • Don’t → Doughn’t: As in “Doughn’t fall for it.”
  • Though → Dough: As in “You look as dough you’ve seen a ghost!”
  • *do*→ *dough*: Any word which contains the “dough” sound (or similar) can be made into an easy dough pun: abdoughmen (abdomen), Adoughbe (Adobe), adoughlescence, aficionadoughs, anecdoughtal, antidoughte, avacadough, bulldoughzer, commandough, condoughlences, crescendough (crescendo), doughmain, doughnation, doughnor, doughsage, doughze, Indoughnesian, innuendough, landoughners, Macedoughnian, overshadough, meadough, Orlandough, pseudough, shadough, taekwondough, tornadough, windough, widough, tuxedough, wierdough.
  • Do→ Dough: As in “I dough what I can.” and “What are you doughing right now?”
  • Slice: As in “It’s a lie no matter how you slice it.” and “Slice of the action”
  • Even → Oven: As in “I don’t care about profit, I’ll be happy if we break oven.” and “Keep an oven keel.” and “I’m going to get oven with him.”
  • Often → Oven: As in “Do you come here oven?” and “Every so oven.”
  • Make → Bake: As in “I can’t bake head or tail of it.” and “Enough to bake you sick.” and “Bake believe” and “It’ll bake a world of difference.” and “Just trying to bake ends meet.” and “Bake a name for yourself.”
  • Making → Baking: As in “A legend in the bakin’” and “This is history in the baking” and “You’re baking a fool of yourself.”
  • Great → Grate: As in “Oh grate! Another pizza pun.” and “Grate minds think alike.”
  • I love → Olive: As in “Olive you so much!” and “Olive silly food puns!”
  • Or live → Olive: As in “Live like a king olive on a shoe string.”.
  • All of → Olive: As in “Sending olive my love to your family.”
  • Much room → Mushroom: “It’s only a little elevator, there isn’t mushroom in here.”
  • To my toes → Tomatoes: As in “I got a shiver from my head tomatoes.”
  • Tomorrow → Tomato: As in “Here today, gone tomato.”
  • All up in your → Jalapeño: As in “Jalapeño business.” and “Jalapeño grill.”
  • Delivery: As in “Good pizza pun, great delivery. 10/10″
  • Delivery man: As in “Good pizza pun, great delivery, man. 10/10″
  • Take away → Take-away: As in “If you take-away my freedom to pun I will become a husk of a person.”
  • Take out → Takeout: As in “We need to takeout their trade routes and lay siege from the north.”
  • Topping: As in “She keeps topping me with better pizza puns whenever I think I’ve got a good one.”
  • Topped: As in “This pizza pun cannot be topped.”
  • Supreme: As in “Is there really such a thing as a magical supreme being?” and “Disco music reigned supreme in the 70s” and “That was supremely disappointing.”
  • Cheesy: As in “All of these pizza puns are so cheesy.”
  • Around → Round: As in “I’ll be there ’round 5pm.”

Pizza-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of pizza-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

pizza, pizzeria, pizza hut, Papa John’s, Little Caesars, Domino’s, cheese, italy, pepperoni, tomato, mozzarella, dough, yeast, knead, spin dough, toss dough, tomato paste, gourmet, takeout, take-away, flatbread, masonry oven, anchovies, anchovy, delivery, deliveryman, pizza man, basil, calzone, crust, slice, pizzetta, margherita, topping, toppings, lahmacun, deep-dish, marinara, stone-baked, fast food, supreme, deluxe, cold pizza, olives, pineapple, bake, baked, stromboli, peel, cornicione, matzah, vegetariana, hawaiian, napolitana, capricciosa, mexicana, round

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Bread Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on bread puns! 🍞 Bread is one of the more popular topics for word play on the internet, probably because there are so many different types of breads, all with unusual foreign names that are great for making puns with. This entry covers all the well-known bread puns, plus quite a few more that haven’t been used-to-death yet. It also includes toast puns and until Punpedia gets big enough to warrant distinct entries for them, this is the entry for baking puns / bakery puns too.

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on food puns, donut puntspasta puns, potato puns, cooking puns, cake puns and pizza puns.

Bread Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about bread that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • She better → Ciabatta: The term “ciabatta” is pronounced like “shi-batta” and refers to a floury-crusted Italian bread. Examples: “Ciabatta study hard if she wants to pass the test.” and “Ciabatta be quick, we’re nearly sold out!”
  • None → Naan: As in “I don’t want naan of that.” and “A jack of all trades and a master of naan.” and “Naan the wiser.” and “Naan of your business!” and “Second to naan.”
  • No one → Naan: As in “Naan’s home at the moment, but you can leave a message after the tone.”
  • Nan → Naan: As in, “Meet my naan,” and “My naan’s a great cook.”
  • Grain: As in “I’m going to go against the grain here and say …” and “There’s a grain of truth in what he’s saying.” and “I’d take it with a grain of salt.”
  • Rain → Grain: As in, “Right as grain,” and “Chasing grainbows,” and “Come grain or shine,” and “Grain on my parade,” and “Make it grain,” and “Graindrops keep falling on my head,” and “Graining cats and dogs,” and “Singin’ in the grain,” and “Somewhere over the grainbow,” and “Spitting with grain.” Notes: to chase rainbows is to go after unrealistic things. To rain on someone’s parade is to ruin a happy moment for them.
  • Grey → Grain: As in, “Fifty shades of grain,” and “A grain area,” and “Grain is the new black,” and “Grain matter,” and “Shades of grain.” Note: shades of grey refers to the complexity of a situation.
  • Brain → Grain: As in, “All brawn and no grains,” and “Beat your grains out,” and “Grain dead,” and “Grain fart,” and “Grain teaser,” and “Grain wave,” and “Grainstorming session,” and “Got it on the grain,” and “Hare grained,” and “A no-grainer,” and “Pick your grains,” and “Rack your grains,” and “It’s not grain surgery.”
  • Grind → Grain-d: As in, “Bump and grain-d,” and “Daily grain-d,” and “Grain-d down,” and “Grain-d to a halt,” and “Nose to the grain-dstone,” and “Don’t like the bastards grain-d you down.” Note: to have your nose to the grindstone is to work hard.
  • Gain → Grain: As in, “Capital grains,” and “Grain an advantage,” and “Ill-gotten grains,” and “No pain, no grain,” and “Nothing ventured, nothing grained.” Note: a capital gain is a profit from the sale of a capital asset (like stock or real estate).
  • *gain* → *grain*: As in, “Agrainst all odds,” and “Agrainst the clock,” and “Bar-grain basement,” and “Come a-grain?” and “A fool’s bar-grain,” and “Here we go a-grain,” and “More than you bar-grained for,” and “Now and a-grain,” and “A race agrainst time,” and “You can say that a-grain,” and “Back agrainst the wall.”
  • *ray* → *grain*: Change the “ray” sound in some words to “grain”: grain-ciously (graciously), engrainve (engrave), grain-dation (gradation), grain-dient (gradient), immi-grain-tion (immigration), ingrain-dient (ingredient).
  • Serial → Cereal: As in “There’s a cereal killer on the loose.”
  • Surreal → Cereal: As in “The view from the summit was cereal.” and “I love impressionism and cereal art.”
  • Stone → Scone: As in “The philosopher’s scone.” and “Leave no scone unturned.” and “Sticks and scones may break my bones …”
  • Its/It’s going → ‘Scone: As in “Scone to be a lot of fun!” and “Scone swimmingly.”
  • Its/It’s gone → ‘Scone: As in “It’s not coming back son. Scone.” and “Scone worse than we expected.”
  • *s can’t → Scone’t: “This scone’t go on much longer.”
  • Wheat: As in, “Separate the wheat from the chaff.” Note: to separate the wheat from the chaff is to separate the valuable from the worthless.
  • White → Wheat: As in, “A wheater shade of pale,” and “A wheat knight,” and “Wheat as a ghost,” and “Wheat as a sheet,” and “Great wheat shark,” and “Like wheat on rice,” and “Little wheat lie,” and “Men in wheat coats,” and “Not everything is black and wheat,” and “Wheat water rafting.” Note: like white on rice refers to a very close situation.
  • Sweet → Swheat: As in, “Home swheat home,” and “Swheat dreams,” and “Swheat nothings,” and “A swheat tooth,” and “Swheaten the pot,” and “Swheaten the deal,” and “Swheatheart,” and “Take the bitter with the swheat,” and “Short but swheat.”
  • Sweat → Swheat: As in, “Blood, swheat and tears,” and “Beads of swheat,” and “Break out in a cold swheat,” and “Don’t swheat it,” and “Running with swheat,” and “My new swheater,” and “Swheating bullets,” and “Swheat it out.”
  • Weight → Wheat: As in, “Pull your wheat,” and “Punching above your wheat,” and “Throw your wheat around,” and “Watch your wheat,” and “A wheat off my mind,” and “Worth your wheat in gold,” and “A dead wheat.”
  • *ate* → *wheat*: As in, evacu-wheat (evacuate), fluctu-wheat (fluctuate), and gradu-wheat (graduate).
  • Wait → Wheat: As in “Wheat a second…” and “I am lying in wheat.” and “Wheat and see.”
  • We t* → Wheat: As in “Wheat talked about this last night.” and “Wheat took our time.”
  • We’d → Wheat: As in “Wheat love for you to join us!”
  • What → Wheat: As in “Wheatever, man.” and “Wheat are you up to today?”
  • Bred → Bread: As in “Perfect table manners! You’re well bread.” and “My dog is a pure bread.”
  • Brad → Bread: As in “When’s Bread Pitt’s next film coming out?”
  • Bread: As in: “Bread always falls butter side down,” and “Bread and butter,” and “Bread of life,” and “Break bread,” and “Half a loaf is better than no bread,” and “Have your bread buttered on both sides,” and “Put bread on the table,” and “Take bread out of someone’s mouth,” and “The greatest thing since sliced bread,” and “A hair’s breadth.”
  • Read → B-read: As in, “All I know is what I b-read in the papers,” and “Exceedingly well b-read,” and “A good b-read,” and “B-read any good books lately?” and “I can b-read you like a book,” and “A bit of light b-reading,” and “B-read ’em and weep,” and “B-read between the lines,” and “B-read my lips,” and “At the b-ready,” and “I can’t b-read minds.”
  • Bed → Bread: As in, “Bread and breakfast,” and “A bread of nails,” and “Between you, me and the breadpost,” and “Get into bread with,” and “Get out of the wrong side of the bread,” and “You’ve made your bread, now lie in it,” and “Don’t go to bread on an argument,” and “Breadtime,” and “In bread with,” and “Wet the bread,” and “Get out of bread!” Notes: if something is between you, me and the bedpost, then it’s a secret. 
  • Bled → Bread: As in, “My papercut bread all over the place.”
  • Bride → Bread: As in, “Always the breadsmaid, never a bread,” and “Blushing bread,” and “Bread to be,” and “Father of the bread,” and “Here comes the bread.” 
  • Roll: As in “We’re on a roll!” and “Ready to roll?” and “She’s a great roll model.” and “Traditional gender rolls are lame.” and “Did she make the honour roll?”
  • Loaf: As in “Stop loafing around! Get up and do something!” (To “loaf” is to waste time and laze about)
  • Laugh → Loaf: As in “Loafter is the best medicine.” and “And he loafed right in my face.” and “I’m loafing my head off.”
  • Love → Loaf: As in “I loaf you <3″ and “The world needs more loaf.”
  • Life → Loaf: As in “Loaf is like a box of chocolates.” and “All walks of loaf.” and “It was a loaf-changing experience.” and “As large as loaf.” and “Living the high loaf.” and “Hold on for dear loaf!” and “Loaf coach” and “Loaf in the fast lane.” and “Loaf support.” and “Loaf’s too short.” and “I had the time of my loaf!”
  • Rap → Wrap: As in “That was an epic wrap battle.” (Playing on the flat-bread sandwich alternative)
  • Rapper → Wrapper: “She hit it big and is now a world famous wrapper.”
  • Do not → Donut: As in “I donut want to get into a pun battle with you.” and “Donut tempt me.”
  • Bit of (Bit ‘a) → Pita: “Don’t make a blind pita difference.”
  • Why → Rye: “Rye do you ask?” and “Rye do bread puns make me giggle?” and “Rye hast thou forsaken me?” and “Rye are you doing this to me?”
  • Wry → Rye: “A rye smile.” and “With rye Scottish wit.” (Rye is a type of grain used to make bread)
  • Rye: Words that contain the “rye” sound can be made into terribly silly bread puns: alryete, bryete, Bryean (Bryan), circumscryebed, compryesed, contryeved, copyryete, cryesis, cryeterion, cryeme, dryevers, descryebe, enterpryese, depryeved, fryeday, fryed, fryetened, pryeceless, pryemarily, pryevacy, pryeority, pryez, ryenocerous, ryeteous, ryetfully, ryevalries, samurye, subscryebed, surpryesingly, tryeangle, ryeting, tryeumph, rye-fle.
  • Riled up→ Rye-led up: As in “Jeez, calm down. No need to get rye-led up!”
  • Least→ Yeast: As in “Last, but not yeast.” and “Yeast common denominator.” and “It’s the yeast I could do.”
  • East→ Yeast: As in “I’m heading over yeast for a holiday.”
  • Need → Knead: As in “Only on a knead-to-know basis.” and “A friend in knead is a friend indeed.” and “You knead your head examined.”
  • Needy → Kneady: As in “He’s a bit kneady.”
  • Kneed → Knead: As in “He was knead in the chest during his rugby match.”
  • Get → Baguette: As in “Buy one, baguette one free.” and “I think I can baguette away with it.” and “Baguette cracking!” and “I’m trying to baguette into the habit of it.” and “Baguette out of my hair!”
  • Forget → Baguette: As in “Ahh, baguette it – you wouldn’t understand.” and “Lest we baguette.” and “Don’t baguette your towel!”
  • Toast: Can refer to the raising of glasses at a gathering to honour something: “Let’s call a toast.” It also has a slang usage: “You are toast.” Meaning “I’m going to beat you” at some competition (or physically).
  • *oast*→ *toast*: If a word contains the “toast” sound, a toast pun can sometimes be made: toastcard (postcard), toastess (hostess), toastline (coastline), toastdoctoral (postdoctoral), toastmortem (postmortem), toastmodern (postmodern), toastpone (postpone), Toastbusters.
  • Come → Crumb: As in “Crumb to think of it…” and “Crumb to your senses” and “Crumb again?” and “Crumb hell or high water.” and “Crumb out of your shell” and “Crumb rain or shine” and “Do you crumb here often?” and “An idea whose time has crumb.” and “The best is yet to crumb.” and “What has crumb over you?” and “Oh crumb on.”
  • Ban me → Bánh mì: The term “bánh mì” refers to any kind of Vietnamese bread. Examples: “What are you going to do? Bánh mì from making bread puns?”
  • Trust → Crust: As in “Crust me, I’m a doctor.” and “That was a breach of crust.” and “He’s a crustworthy young man.”
  • Christ → Crust: As in “Crust has fallen, crust has risen.” and “Crust is a main figurehead in western mythology.”
  • Crusty: This term can refer to someone (especially an older person) who is bad-tempered.
  • Rusty → Crusty: As in “My punning skills are a little crusty, sorry.”
  • Just → Crust: As in “It’s crust not my day today.” and “It’s crust around the corner.” and “Crust add water.” and “It’s crust a matter of time.”
  • Cust* → Crust*: If a word begins with “cust”, swap it with “crust”: crustodian, crustomer, crustom, crustomary, crustody, crustard, crustodial, crustomise, crustomarily.
  • *ust* → *crust*: If a word has the “ust”, it can sometimes be made into a crust pun: crustice (justice), crustification (justification), crustachioed (mustachioed), crustainable (sustainable), crustainability (sustainability).
  • Leaving → Leaven: “Leaven” is another term for “rising agent”: the ingredient added to make bread rise (usually yeast). Examples: “You’re leaven me here all by myself?” and “Oh, you’re leaven so early?!”
  • Rise: This is a reference to bread “rising” during the yeast fermentation process Examples: “More bread puns? I will rise to that challenge.” and “Rise from the ashes.” and “Rise and shine.” and “The sun has risen.”
  • Wasting time → Loafing around: As in “Stop loafing around and do something useful!”
  • Grainy: Other than referring to grain (the crop food, of course), this can refer to a texture or to a low resolution photograph: “Your profile picture is a bit grainy.”
  • Hot cross buns → Hot cross puns: This one’s a sort of “meta” bread pun.
  • Crumby: This is slang for “dirty”, “poor quality” and related concepts.
  • Money → Dough: The term “dough” is slang for money in some places.
  • *do*→ *dough*: Any word which contains the “dough” sound (or similar) can be made into an easy dough pun: abdoughmen (abdomen), Adoughbe (Adobe), adoughlescence, aficionadoughs, anecdoughtal, antidoughte, avacadough, bulldoughzer, commandough, condoughlences, crescendough (crescendo), doughmain, doughnation, doughnor, doughsage, doughze, Indoughnesian, innuendough, landoughners, Macedoughnian, overshadough, meadough, Orlandough, pseudough, shadough, taekwondough, tornadough, windough, widough, tuxedough.
  • Do→ Dough: As in “I dough what I can.” and “What are you doughing right now?”
  • Ingrained: As in “It was ingrained in me from a young age.”
  • *bun*: Words that contain the “bun” sound, or a similar sound can be made into a bread bun pun: absorbunt, abundance, abundantly, bunal (banal), bunality, bunevolence, bunignly, bunocular, bunanza, bourbun, bunch, bundle, bunny, bunting, bunyan, cabunets, combunation, cubun, disturbunce, husbund, incumbunts, Lebunon, Robunson, urbun, urbunization.
  • Pun → Bun: As in “No bun intended.”
  • *pun* → *bun*: Some words containing the “pun” sound can be made into terrible bread puns: particibunts (participants), perbundicular (perpendicular), Jabunese, occubunts (occupants), combunsation, bundits, bunishment, weabunry, sbunge (sponge).
  • Spread: As in “Spread your wings.” and “It spread like wildfire.” and “Stop spreading rumours.”
  • Slice: As in “It’s a lie no matter how you slice it.” and “Slice of the action”.
  • Awry → A rye: As in “Many youthful romances go a rye” and “I got the impression that something was a rye.”
  • Inbred → Inbread: As in “Inbread dogs are more likely to be unhealthy.”
  • Loafers: As in “My new pair of loafers are so cosy!”
  • Bed → Bread: As in “Bread and breakfast” and “Don’t let the bread bugs bite!”
  • Self-loathing → Self-loaving: As in “Excessive punning can lead to self-loaving.”
  • Hybrid → High bread: As in “I’m going to buy a high bread because it’s cheaper and more environmentally friendly.”
  • Jam: As in “My sandwich is jam-packed.” and “All seven of us were jammed into the same car.”
  • PunpernickelPumpernickel is a type of bread.
  • Patriarchy → Pastryarchy: As in “Down with the pastryarchy!” and “We live in a pastryarchy.”
  • Pain: France is famous for its breads and “pain” means “bread” in French, so this is an easy, but subtle pun.
  • Better → Butter: As in, “I’ve got a butter idea” and “Anything you can do, I can do butter” and “Appealing to your butter judgement” and “My butter half” and “Butter late than never” and “Butter luck next time” and “Butter safe than sorry” and “Butter than sex” and “Butter than new” and “I’ve changed for the butter” and “I couldn’t have said it butter” and “For butter or worse” and “Get the butter of” and “I should have known butter.”
  • Barter → Butter: As in, “Trade and butter economy.”
  • But her → Butter: As in, “Butter suitcase! It’s been left behind!” (a very specific pun)
  • Patter → Butter: As in, “The pitter butter of little feet.”
  • But → Butter: As in, “Butter seriously” and “Butter heads” and “Butter out” and “Down, butter not out” and “Everything butter the kitchen sink” and “Kick butter” and “No butters” and “Last butter not least” and “Gone, butter not forgotten.”
  • Potter → Butter: As in, “Harry Butter” and “Buttering about.”
  • Better → Breader: As in “Breader off dead.” and “The sooner the breader.”
  • Sentences → Sandwiches: As in “It’s crazy! We always finish each others sandwiches.” (Made somewhat possible as a pun by the Disney movie “Frozen”)
  • Mild → Mould/Mold: As in “I had a mold distrust of this man.” and “I’m moldly annoyed.”
  • Old → Mould/Mold: As in “Out with the mold and in with the new.” and “Up to your mold tricks I see.” and “The good mold days.”
  • Call her → Challah: This is a special type of Jewish ceremonial bread that is pronounced like “ka-la”. Example: “You should challah tonight when she finishes work.”
  • All of → Challah: As in “Challah these bread puns are cracking me up!”
  • Glue ten → Gluten: As in “If we gluten of these together we’ll have a nice chain of them.”
  • Even → Oven: As in “I don’t care about profit, I’ll be happy if we break oven.” and “Keep an oven keel.” and “I’m going to get oven with him.” Note: to keep an even keel is to keep something steady and balanced.
  • Often → Oven: As in “Do you come here oven?” and “Every so oven.”
  • Glaze: As in “The prospect makes my eyes glaze over with boredom.”
  • Graze → Glaze: As in “It just glazed the surface.” and “I’ll be fine, it’s just a glaze.”
  • Barely → Barley: As in “I’m barley getting by.” Note: barley is a type of cereal grain.
  • Waffle: As in “He just kept waffling on and on.”
  • Nothin’ → Muffin: As in “All or muffin.” and “Here goes muffin!” and “I will stop at muffin to …” and “You ain’t seen muffin yet.” and “We’ve got muffin in common.”
  • Make → Bake: As in “I can’t bake head or tail of it.” and “Enough to bake you sick.” and “Bake believe” and “It’ll bake a world of difference.” and “Just trying to bake ends meet.” and “Bake a name for yourself.”
  • Making → Baking: As in “A legend in the bakin’” and “This is history in the baking” and “You’re baking a fool of yourself.”
  • Floor → Flour: As in “A bread pun battle? I’ll mop the flour with you.”
  • Crap → Crepe: As in “I don’t give a crepe.” and “What a load of crepe.” and “Cut the crepe.”
  • Creepy → Crepe-y: As in “This music is crepe-y
  • Crack a → Cracker: As in “These baking puns made me cracker smile.”
  • Pan → Pen: “Pan” means bread in Japanese and Spanish. Examples: “The pan is mightier than the sword.” and “Put pan to paper.”
  • Brought → Brot: “Brot” means loaf in German. Examples: “I brot you into this world.” and “It was later brot to light that …”
  • Penny → Pane: “Pane” (pronounced “pahn-eh”) means bread in Italian. Examples: “Pane for your thoughts” and “It cost me a pretty pane.”
  • Flower → Flour: As in “Remember to stop and smell the flours.”
  • Adore → Adough: “I adough you.”
  • Don’t → Doughn’t: As in “Doughn’t fall for it.”
  • Though → Dough: As in “You look as dough you’ve seen a ghost!”
  • Hour → Flour: As in “We could go on for flours.” and “The plane leaves in one flour.” and “I’m on a flourly wage.”
  • Flair → Flour: As in, “A flour for the dramatic.”
  • Flir* → Flour*: As in, “Flourting with disaster” and “A real flourt.”
  • Flor* → Flour*: As in, “Floura and fauna” and “Floural arrangements.” Other words that could work: flourist (florist), Flourida (Florida), Flourence (Florence) and flourentine (florentine). Note: a florentine is a type of biscuit.)
  • Maze → Maize: As in “It’s a complicated maize to navigate.”
  • Amaze/amazing → Amaize/amaize-ing: As in, “What an amaize-ing effort!” and “You never cease to amaize me.”
  • *mise → *maize: As in, minimaize (minimise), surmaize (surmise), victimaize (victimise), compromaize (compromise), customaize (customise), maximaize (maximise).
  • Again → A grain: As in “Come a grain?” and “Never a grain.” and “Time and time a grain.” and “Now and a grain.”
  • Sour though → Sourdough: As in “The look he gave me was very sourdough.”
  • Puffy: As in “His eyes were puffy and full of tears.”
  • Red → Bread: As in “Walking down the bread carpet.” and “That was a bread herring.”
  • Ready → Bready: As in “Bready, get set, go!” and “Bready to roll.” and “Battle bready.” and “Get bready to rumble!” and “I was born bready.”
  • Readily → Breadily: As in “The island is breadily accessible by canoe.” and “I’ll breadily admit that I was wrong in that decision.”
  • Redhead → Breadhead: As in “Many of the greatest Scottish warriors were Breadheads.”
  • Head → Bread: As in “All the fame has gone to his bread.” and “You need to have your bread examined.” and “From bread to toe.” and “Keep your bread above water.” and “That went straight over my bread.” and “They both went bread to bread.” and “I couldn’t make bread or tail of it.”
  • Crumble: As in “Kingdoms will crumble.” and “The crumbling ruins.”
  • Rumble/Grumble → Crumble: As in “They hear the crumbling of the thunder. ” and “Talking about bread is making my stomach crumble.”
  • Its / It’s → Oats / Oat’s: As in “Oat’s just a matter of time.” and “Oat’s a shame.” and “Oat’s nothing personal” and “Oat’s worth oats weight in gold.” and “Takes oats toll.” and “A life of oats own.”
  • Ought → Oat: As in “You oat to say sorry.” and “Five minutes oat to be enough time.”
  • Sub: As in “That joke was sub-par.” and “It wasn’t terrible, just sub-optimal.”
  • Sub*: Words that start with “sub” (referencing the type of sandwich) are easy bread puns: sublime, submissive, subdivision, subcommittee, subconscious, subcontinent, subdue, subgroup, subjected, subject, subjectivity, submersible, submit, subscriber, subscription, subsequent, subliminal, subordinated, subsection, submarine, substance, substitution, subtract, subvert, suburbia, suburb, subtitles, subtraction, substrate, subsidy.
  • *sub*: If a word contains the “sub” sound, there could be a very forced bread pun opportunity: accessubility, admissuble, incomprehesuble, disubility, flexsubility, irresponsubility, possubility, enforsuble, taxsuble, unsubstantiated.
  • Stale: As in “All these bread memes are stale.”
  • Pun per nickel → Pumpernickel: As in “I could tell you more bread puns but it’ll be one punpernickel.”
  • Whole meal → Wholemeal: As in “Bread is great, but you should eat it with other foods, not as a wholemeal in itself.”
  • Homemade: Homemade bread may be impressed into people’s minds strongly enough to make a subtle use of “homemade” a bread pun.
  • Half-baked: This means “not completely planned or thought out”. For example: “Half-baked bread puns ought to be illegal.”
  • Rusty → Rusky: This refers to a hard “twice-baked” bread. Examples: “My bread pun skills are a little rusky.”
  • Pow → Pau: This is a type of Chinese steamed bun with filling. Words containing the “pow” sound can be simple pau puns: pauerpuff girls, pauerless, pauerful, pauder, pauerhouse, pauer, pauerboat.
  • Seedy: This is a describing word for someone or something that is morally questionable, foul, or dirty. Examples: “So many seedy people hanging around that place.”
  • Raise: As in “I’ve been working at the bakery for two years now and haven’t recieved a raise.” and “Raise the dead.”
  • Peace of mind → Pizza mind: Pizza puns can sometimes classify as bread puns, but it depends on the specific context.
  • Pit us → Pitas: As in “He’s trying to pitas against each other.”
  • Way back → Zweiback: This is a type of hard twice-baked bread. Its main pronunciation sounds like “swee-back” or “zwee-back” which sounds a bit like “way back”. Example: “Zweiback in the day, puns were cheap.”

Bread-Related Phrases

Common phrases, idioms and cliches which are related to bread can be used for some subtle and witty word play. Here is a list of the bread themed phrases that we’ve found so far:

  • loaf about
  • bread winner
  • it’s my bread and butter
  • born and bred
  • break bread
  • butter face
  • butter fingers
  • cake walk
  • cast bread upon the waters
  • crumb of comfort
  • knuckle sandwich
  • piece of cake
  • takes the cake
  • as flat as a pancake
  • as nutty as a fruit cake
  • the cherry on the cake
  • you can’t have your cake and eat it too
  • bread always falls buttered side down
  • put bread on the table
  • the best thing since sliced bread
  • you are toast
  • the toast of the town
  • one slice short of a loaf
  • take it with a grain of salt
  • go against the grain
  • hasn’t a grain of sense
  • she/he knows what side his bread is buttered on
  • that’s the way the cookie crumbles
  • drive for show and putt for dough
  • she’s/he’s on a roll
  • melt like butter
  • raking in the dough
  • separate the wheat from the chaff
  • rock and roll
  • a few sandwiches short of a picnic
  • upper crust
  • a baker’s dozen
  • against the grain

Bread-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of bread-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

stale, bake, baked, toasted, unleavened, leaven, crusty, French, moldy, wholemeal, multigrain, homemade, whole-wheat, wheat, grain, barley, rye, naan, sub, crumble, oat, bread, puffy, maize, flour, dough, baking, muffin, waffle, glaze, challah, gluten-free, brot, roti, butter, spread, jam, sandwich, pastry, pumpernickel, slice, bun, loaf, hot-cross buns, crust, bánh mì toast, baguette, knead, yeast, pita, donut, scone, roll, ciabatta, sourdough, crepe, glaze, white, brown, rusk, toaster, breadbasket, matzo, corn bread, pone, wafer, bagel, tortilla, manchet, French toast, challah, zwieback, brioche, chapati, fruitbread, ramekin, pizza, pita, focaccia, bannock, raise, rise, rising, soggy, crumpet, crummy, soda bread, pretzel, cake, slice, bread bin, chapatti, bakehouse, paste, breadcrumbs, fairy bread, bread knife, sub, submarine sandwich, burrito, margarine, yeast extract, cereal, flatbread, crouton, breadstick, durum, bread machine, leavening agent, crispbread, bran, starch, quinoa, pumpkin bread.

Bread Jokes

If you’re looking for some very corny bread jokes, you’ve come to the right place. All of these one-liner-style bread jokes use puns in their punchline. Some are phonetic puns, others are based on a slang phrase or cliche related to bread.

  • What did the baker say to his assistant after he caught him stealing money from the till? – That was a breach of crust.
  • What did the Indian chef say to the nosey employee? – It’s naan of your business!
  • Why doesn’t bread like warm weather? – Things get toasty!
  • Why aren’t bread jokes funny? – Because they always get mould.
  • What did the baker get for her mother on Mother’s Day? – Flours
  • What is a baker’s favourite Beatles song? – “Loaf is all you need”
  • When does sourdough bread rise? – When you yeast expect it.
  • What did the butter say to the bread? – I’m on a roll!
  • Why does everyone need bread and water? – Loaf makes the world go round.
  • What did one slice of bread say to the other slice of bread when he saw some butter and jam on the table? – We’re toast!
  • Why was the baker in a panic? – He was in a loaf or death situation.
  • What did the baker say to the lazy assistant? – Stop loafing around and get over here!
  • What did the baker’s assistant say to her partner after her first day on the job?  – It’s a crumb-y place to work.
  • How was the bakers assistant paid? – On a flourly wage.
  • What type of car did the baker buy? – A high bread car
  • Where did the baker get her baking skills? – They were in grained in her from a young age.

Bread Pun Images

Below is a collection of bread-related visual puns and meme-type images. If you’ve created your own visual bread puns or found one that we’ve missed, please post us a link in the comments section 🙂

Did this Punpedia entry help you?

Did you find the bread-related pun that you were looking for? If so, great! Otherwise, please let us know what you were looking for in the comments, below! Are you looking for puns for text messages, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, or some other social media platform? Would you like to see more funny bread pun images? Or perhaps you just want more bread puns for your photo captions? Whatever the case, please let us know, and help us improve this Punpedia entry. If you’re got any bread puns (image or text) that aren’t included in this article, please submit them in the comments and one of our curators will add it as soon as possible. Thanks for visiting Punpedia 🙂