Cow Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on cow puns! 🐮🐄 The list contains bull puns, calf puns, udder puns, and quite a few others based around cow-related topics, but this entry is a work-in-progress, so please help us by submitting more puns in the comments at the bottom 🙂

As always, Punpedia does its best to be a cruelty-free site, so we won’t be including any jokes or puns about branding, slaughtering, or bull-fighting. While we do have lists on dairy products (see our cheese puns, chocolate puns and milk puns), we encourage everyone to learn about the dairy industry. Check out how cool cows are (it’s a video), and enjoy the puns!

Cow Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about cows that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page! Without further ado, here’s the list of cow puns:

  • Cow: There are several idioms/phrases which include the word “cow”, and so might be used as cow puns in the right context: “A cash cow” and “Don’t have a cow!” and “Holy cow” and “A sacred cow” and “How now, brown cow?” and “Until the cows come home” and “Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free?”
  • Bull: Likewise, there are several idioms/phrases that are easy bull puns: “A cock-and-bull story” and “Like a bull in a china shop” and “Bull-headed” and “Grab the bull by its horns” and “Full of bull” and “Bull’s-eye” and “Mess with the bull and you get the horns” and “Hung like a bull” and “Bull-headed” and “What a load of bull/BS” and “Bullish (aggressively confident)” and “Like a red flag to a bull
  • Camouflage → Cow-moo-flage: As in “We cow-moo-flaged well amongst the shrubs.” and “Put on your cow-moo gear – we’ll need to be sneaky.”
  • Cowabunga: “Cowabunga, dude!”
  • Mood: As in “I’m in a bad mood today.” and “I’m not in the mood for it.”
  • Coincidence → Cowincidence: As in “This wasn’t a cowincidence.”
  • *cow*: If a word contains the “cow” sound (or anything vaguely similar), it can obviously be turned into a silly cow pun: cowncil (council), cowntenance (countenance), cownteract (counteract), cownterfeit, cownterbalance, cownterpart, cownterproductive, cownt, cowntess, cowntless, cowardice, coward (or cow-herd), accowntability, accowntants, encowntered, knocowt (knockout), encowntering, scowting, unaccowntable, loocowt (lookout), discownted, scowl, miscowculation.
  • Co* → Cow*: If a word begins with the “co” sound, it can sometimes be turned into a silly cow pun: cowoperation (coooperation), cowagulation (coagulation), cowaxial (coaxial), cowefficient (coefficient), cowconut (coconut), cowcaine (cocaine), cowercive (coercive), cowexistence (coexistence), cowhabitation (cohabitation), cowherently, cowherence, cowld-blooded, cowhesive, cowhesion, cowordinates, cowordinator, cowvert (covert).
  • *kow*→ *cow*: As in, “Don’t cowtow to them.” Note: to kowtow is to bow deeply in a show of respect.
  • *kew*→ *cow*: As in, “Cowpie doll,” and “Cowpie mayonnaise.” Note: Kewpie is both a Japanese brand of mayonnaise and a type of doll.
  • *ka*→ *cow*: As in, Eurecow, vodcow, Alascow, papricow, remarcowble, remarkcowble, and lakcowdaisical.
  • *ca*→ *cow*: As in, “Americow can do better,” and “Circow 1999,” and “A loud advocowte (advocate).” Other suitable words: meccow (mecca), Africow (Africa), orcow (orca), alpacow (alpaca), broadcowst (broadcast), implicowtion (implication), occowsion (occasion), applicowtion (application), indicowtion (indication), and dedicowte (dedicate).
  • *cau*→ *cow*: As in, “Cowt between the devil and the deep blue sea,” and “Cowt with your pants down,” and ” Err on the side of cowtion,” and “A lost cowse,” and “Throw cowtion to the wind,” and “Wouldn’t be cowt dead.” Other suitable words: cowstic (caustic), cowtious (cautious), cowcasian (caucasian), cowldron (cauldron), becowse (because).
  • *bull*: If a word contains the “bull” sound (or similar), it can often be turned into a silly bull pun: bulldog, bulldozer, bulletins, bullies, bullied, bullion, bullocks, bullwark (bulwark), bullevard (boulevard).
  • Pull→ Bull: As in, “Like bulling teeth,” and “Bulling away,” and “Bull a face,” and “Bull a fast one,” and “Bull up short,” and “Bulling the strings,” and “Bull the pin,” and “Bull your finger out,” and “Bull your socks up,” and “Bull yourself together.”
  • *bal*→ *bull*: As in, “Hanging in the bullance,” and “Bullance the books,” and “A bullpark estimate,” and “Go down like a lead bulloon,” and “Stop eyebulling (eyeballing) me,” and “Go bullistic,” and “What bulloney (baloney),” and “The hairy eyebull.” Other words that would work: bullk (balk), bullot (ballot), globull (global), verbull (verbal), tribull (tribal), cymbull (cymbal), herbull (herbal), and footbull. Notes: to balk is to stop suddenly and not continue.
  • *bel*→ *bull*: As in, “Bullieve it or not,” and “Bullieve you me,” and “Bullow the belt,” and “Hitting bullow your weight,” and “Seeing is bullieving,” and “Suspend your disbullief,” and “Opportunities are seldom labulled,” and “You don’t bullong in business.” Other words that would work: bulligerent (belligerent), bull (bell), bulloved (beloved), labull (label), rebull (rebel), decibull (decibel). Note: to hit below your weight is to perform under expectation.
  • *bil*→ *bull*: As in, “Cut the umbullical cord,” and “Eliminate the possibullities,” and “Take responsibullity.” Other words that would work: bullow (billow), bullboard (billboard), bullion (billion), gerbull (gerbil), liabullity (liability), mobull (mobile), accountabullity (accountability), abullity (ability), capabullity (capability), rehabullitation (rehabilitation), sustainabullity (sustainability).
  • *bol*→ *bull*: As in, “Bulldly go where no man has gone before,” and “Close the stable door after the horse has bullted,” and “Nuts and bullts,” and “Fortune favours the bull-d (bold).” Other words that would work: bullster (bolster), bullocks (bollocks), symbull, gambull (gambol), hyperbulle (hyperbole), abullish (abolish), metabullism. Note: to close the stable door after the horse has bolted is to look after a situation after things have gone badly.
  • *bul*/*bull*: As in, “Bully for you,” and “Buy it in bullk,” and “Bite the bullet,” and “A lightbullb moment.” Other words that can work: bullwark (bulwark), bullb (bulb), bullge (bulge), bullsh*t, nebullous (nebulous), fabullous (fabulous), nebulla (nebula), and vocabullary (vocabulary). Note: if something is nebulous, then it’s vague and without clear form.
  • *boul*→ *bull*: As in, “Over the shoulder bullder (boulder) holder,” and “The bullevard (boulevard) of broken dreams.” Note: “over the shoulder boulder holder” is a very cheeky and colloquial term for a bra.
  • *pal*→ *bull*: As in, “A princibull player.” Other “pal” containing words: bullindrome (palindrome), obull (opal), municibull (municipal), archetypebull (archetypal), bullpable (palpable), and bulltry (paltry). Notes: if something is paltry, then it’s a very small amount. A palindrome is a word that is the same forwards and backwards.
  • *pel*→ *bull*: As in, “The gosbull (gospel) truth,” and “Disbulling (dispelling) rumours,” and “My dobullganger (doppelganger).”
  • *pul*→ *bull*: As in, “Keep your finger on the bullse (pulse),” and “Beaten to a bullp,” and “I won’t be manibullated (manipulated) by you.” Other words that could work: bullchritude (pulchritude), bullpit (pulpit), bulley (pulley), bullmonary (pulmonary), bullverise (pulverise), stibullate (stipulate), imbullse (impulse), pobullist (populist), pobullar (popular), combullsory (compulsory), pobullation (population), obullent (opulent). Notes: if something is opulent, it’s luxurious.
  • *pool*→ *bull*: As in, bullside (poolside), sbull (spool), cessbull, whirlbull, and carbull. Notes: a cesspool is an underground reservoir for liquid waste.
  • *poul*→ *bull*: As in, bulltry (poultry), bulltice (poultice), and ambulle (ampoule). Notes: an ampoule is a small sealed container. A poultice is a medicated cloth used to treat aching and inflammation.
  • *ple*→ *bull*: As in, “Bullead (plead) guilty,” and “I bulledge (pledge) my allegiance,” and “What a bulleasure (pleasure).” Other words you could use: bullethora (plethora), bullea (plea), bulleasant (pleasant), bullease (please), and abbull (apple), princibull, peobull (people), simbull (simple), stabull (stable/staple), exambull (example), multibull (multiple), coubull (couple), ambull (ample), combullement (complement), combullex (complex), imbullement (implement), and combullete (complete).
  • Fool→Bull: As in, “A bull and his money are soon parted,” and “Act the bull,” and “Tom bullery (foolery).”
  • *bl* → *bull*terrabull (terrible), admirabull (admirable), assembull (assemble), audibull (audible), bullackmail (blackmail), bibull-iography (bibliography), bull-anket (blanket), bull-asphemy, bull-indfolded, bull-ister, bull-ockbuster, bubulling, Casabullanca, cold-bullooded (or cowld-bullooded), comfortabull, considerabull, concievabull, estabullish, dribull (dribble), fumbull (fumble), gambull, hobbull, grumbull, horribull, disabull (disable), impeccabull, imperceptibull, impossibull, improbabull, inescapabull, inexorabull, inextricabull, interchangabull, irresistabull, justifyabull, memorabull, mumbull, nobull (noble), miserabull, invariabull, irresistabull, interchangabull, predictabull, pro-bull-ems, pub-bull-ication, roadbullock (roadblock), suitabull, unreasonabull, unquestionabull, unavoidabull, understandabull, unbelievabull, tumbulling, trembulling, troubulling, inconcievabull.
  • *moo*: If a word contains the “moo” sound (or similar), it can often be turned into a silly cow pun: amoosed (amused), moovies, immoovable, Moohammad, moovement, remooval, Moostafa (Mustafa), Moossolini (Mussolini), remoovable, remooving, smooth, unmooved.
  • Utter → Udder: As in “Udderly ridiculous!”
  • Under → Udder: As in, “Udder no illusions” and “Born udder a lucky star” and “Buckle udder the strain” and “Pull the rug out from udder you” and “Don’t let the grass grow udder your feet” and “Down udder” and “Everything udder the sun” and “Get udder way” and “Get udder your skin” and “Keep udder wraps.”
  • *utter* → *udder*: As in, “I can’t believe it’s not budder!” and “All a-fludder (flutter)” and “A cluddered (cluttered) room” and “Mind in the gudder” and “Muddering under your breath” and “Did I studder?” and “Spuddering (sputtering) with indignation” and “Float like a budderfly, sting like a bee.”
  • Under* → Udder*: As in, “How do I make you udderstand?” and “A grand uddertaking” and “Uddermine your authority” and “Uddergoing a transformation” and “Compassion and udderstanding.” Other words: uddercut (undercut), udderway (underway) and udderscore (underscore).
  • A quick note that while we’re able to make cute udder puns, udder infections in dairy cows is painful, can cause death, and while it’s generally preventable, it’s the most common disease for dairy cows due to the unhygenic conditions they’re kept in and the neglectful attitudes towards the cow’s health. Any of us that’s ever gotten mastitis from breastfeeding will be able to sympathise with this!
  • Heard → Herd: As in “I overherd them speaking about …” and “The last I herd, …” and “Your herd it here first.” and “You could have herd a pin drop.” and “Stop me if you’ve herd this one”
  • Field: “I’m an expert in my field.”
  • Hey → Hay: As in “Hay, what’s up?” and “Hay there, friend.”
  • Who f* → Hoof*: As in “Hoofeels hungry right now?” and “Hoofinished the last bit of coconut icecream?”
  • Who’ve → Hoof: As in “Hoof you spoken to so far?”
  • Half → Hoof: As in “Is the glass hoof full or hoof empty?” and “My other/better hoof
  • Huff → Hoof: As in, “Hoofing paint,” and “A hoofy (huffy) attitude,” and “I belong in Hooflepuff (Hufflepuff),” and “Shoofling away,” and “Shoofling the deck,” and “Feeling choofed (chuffed).” Note: to feel chuffed is to feel very pleased.
  • Half → Hoof: As in, “Ain’t hoof bad,” and “My better hoof,” and “Cheap at hoof the price,” and “Getting there is hoof the fun,” and “Hoof awake.” Other half-related words: hoofway (halfway), hoof-baked, hooftime (halftime), hoofhearted, and behoof (behalf).
  • *hef* → *hoof*: As in, “A hoofty (hefty) promise,” and “Grand Thooft Auto,” and “Identity thooft.”
  • *hif* → *hoof*: As in, “Working in shoofts,” and “A whoof of perfume,” and “Makeshooft tent,” and “Shoofty glances.”
  • Have → Hoof/Hoove: As in, “As luck may hoove it,” and “Hoof your cake and eat it too,” and “Hoove a ball,” and “Hoof a bone to pick,” and “Hoof a go,” and “The walls hoove ears.”
  • *hav* → *hoove*: As in, hoove (have), hooveoc (havoc), behooveiour, aftershoove, and behoove (behave).
  • *hev* → *hoove*: As in, “Looking dishooveled (disheveled).”
  • *hiv* → *hoove*: As in, “In the archooves,” and “Shoovers down my spine,” and “Choovealry (chivalry) is not dead, we just don’t know the meaning of it,” and “A beehoove (beehive) hairstyle.”
  • *hov* → *hoove*: As in, hoover (hover), hoovel (hovel), hoovering (hovering), hoovercraft (hovercraft), shoovel and pushoover.
  • Bye son → Bison: As in “Bison! Your mum will pick you up tonight.”
  • Half → Calf: As in “I’m still calf asleep” and “I’ve got calf a mind to …” and “Calf measures”
  • Coff* → Calf*: As in, “Artisan calffee (coffee),” and “Added to the calffers (coffers),” and “Company calf-founders,” and “Back from the calffin (coffin).”
  • Caf* → Calf*: As in, calfe (cafe), calfeteria (cafeteria), calffeine (caffeine), decalf (decaf), scalffold (scaffold).
  • *cuff* → *calf*: As in, calflink (cufflink), calfed (cuffed), scalffle (scuffle), fisticalfs (fisticuffs), handcalfs (handcuffs).
  • Halves → Calves: As in, “Go calves,” and “Don’t do things by calves.”
  • Have her → Heifer: As in “Heifer parents found out yet?”
  • Forever → For heifer: As in “For heifer and heifer.”
  • Tail: Use these tail-related phrases: “Happy as a dog with two tails,” and “Nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs,” and “Bright eyed and busy tailed,” and “Can’t make head or tail of it,” and “Chase your own tail,” and “Two shakes of a lamb’s tail.” Note: two shakes of a lamb’s tail is a phrase used to indicated that something is very fast.
  • Tale → Tail: As in, “Dead men tell no tails,” and “Fairytail ending,” and “Live to tell the tail,” and “Never tell tails out of school,” and “An old wives’ tail,” and “Tattle tail,” and “Tell tail sign.”
  • Talent → Tailent: As in, “___’s got Tailent,” and “A tailented painter,” and “Where would you say your tailents lie?”
  • Toilet → Tailet: As in, “Down the tailet,” and “In the tailet.”
  • Style → Stail: As in, hairstail, freestail, lifestail, and stailus (stylus)
  • Tile → Tail: As in, fertail (fertile), percerntail (percentile), projectail (projectile), reptail (reptile), and versatail (versatile).
  • Her before → Herbivore: As in “I’ve never met herbivore.”
  • Passed/Past your → Pasture: As in “It’s just pasture house on the left.” and “I pasture stall at the fair today but you weren’t there.” and “It’s pasture bedtime.”
  • Could → Cud: As in “Cud you stop it please?” and “As fast as her legs cud carry her” and “I cud do it in my sleep.”
  • Man you’re → Manure: As in “Manure making some awful puns today.”
  • Remnant → Ruminant: As in “I haven’t a ruminant of pride left after making all these terrible cow puns.” (A “ruminant” is a family of hoofed mammals comprising cows, sheep, deer, giraffe and their relatives)
  • Prominent → Pruminant: As in “She’s a pruminant member of our group.”
  • Permanent → Pruminant: As in “I’ve accidentally used pruminant marker on the whiteboard.”
  • Walk → Hoof it: As in “We missed the bus and had to hoof it home.”
  • Go to sleep → Hit the hay: As in “It’s late. I better hit the hay.”

Cow-Related Words

Here are a few cow-related words to help you come up with your own cow puns:

moo, bovine, heifer, bison, manure, udder, ruminant, calf, calves, pasture, grass, oxen, bull, domesticated, buffalo, hoof, hooves, horns, herd, cloven hoof, herbivore, cow patty, hay, cud, manure

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Potato Puns

Welcome to the Punpedia entry on potato puns!   Whether you’re looking for a cute caption, a business name or trying to come up with some silly pickup lines, this entry should have you covered.

All potato-related topics are covered from potato chip puns to sweet potato puns to “peeling” puns and other topics surrounding the preparation of potatoes (baking, boiling, frying, etc.).

You might also like to visit the Punpedia entries on food puns, vegetable puns, curry puns, bread puns and cooking puns.

Potato Puns List

Each item in this list describes a pun, or a set of puns which can be made by applying a rule. If you know of any puns about potatoes that we’re missing, please let us know in the comments at the end of this page!

  • Sudden → Spudden: As in “All of a spudden” and “Spuddenly, out of the blue …”
  • Stud → Spud: As in “He’s a real spud.”
  • Teeter → Tater: As in “She tatered after her dog in her high-heeled shoes.” and “He tatered on the brink of destruction.”
  • Traitor → Tater: As in “He was a tater to his own class.”
  • Hater → Tater: As in “Taters gonna hate.” or “Taters gonna tate.”
  • Tighter → Tater: As in “Grandma’s hugs are tater than a boa constrictor.”
  • *tator* → *tater*: If a word ends with “tator” it can be turned into a silly potato pun: spectater, commentater, dictater, facilitater, imitater, agitater, annotater, resuscitater, rehabilitater, precipitater, decapitater, devistater, dictatership.
  • *tated → *tatered: If a word ends in “tated” you can change it to “tatered” for a silly tater pun: statered (stated), hesi-tater-ed, dictatered, devastatered, irritatered, agitatered, precipi-tater-ed, facilitatered, orientatered, necessitatered, reinstatered, mutatered, rotatered, incapacitatered, disorientatered, overstatered, imitatered, amputatered, rehabilitatered, understatered, regurgitatered, premeditatered, meditatered, decapitatered, commentatered, gravitatered.
  • Leg room → Legume: As in “I always pay a little extra for the aeroplane seats with more legume.”
  • Tube of → Tuber: As in “Can I please purchase a tuber hand cream?”
  • Too bad → Tuberd: As in “You want some? Tuberd, it’s all mine.” and “Tuberd the shoes don’t fit you.”
  • To burn → Tubern: As in “You need tuber-n your boats.” and “I’ve got so much energy tuber-n.” and “You’re going tuber-n your bridges.”
  • To be → Tuber: As in “Tuber or not tuber, that is the question.”
  • To buy → Tuber: As in “I want tuber a new pair of shoes.”
  • *uber*: Words that contain the “uber” sound (or similar) can sometimes be potato puns: extuberant (exuberant), tuberis (hubris), protuberances, tuberty (puberty), tuberculosis.
  • I am → I yam: As in “I yam who I yam.” and “I think, therefore I yam.” and “I yam what I eat.” Note: a yam is a vegetable similar to sweet potato (although they’re unrelated).
  • Yankee → Yamkee: As in “The New York Yamkees are up 3 points!”
  • *yam*: If a word contains the “yam” sound (or even vaguely similar) we can create silly yam puns: accyamulation (accumulation), argyament (argument), consortiyam, docyamentaries, doyamentationmonyaments, Yamaha.
  • Root: As in “I’m rooting for you!” and “Money is the root of all evil.” (The term “root” is also a synonym for sexual intercourse in some countries/regions)
  • Rude → Root: As in “A root awakening.” and “He has no manners – very root.”
  • Route → Root: As in “The road was closed but we found another root.”
  • *root*: If a word contains the “root” sound (or similar) we can make a root vegetable pun: “Please be brootally honest with your feedback.” and “The score was 77-1, a brootal victory by the new team.” and “Her poker face was completely insc-root-able.” and “We’re trying to recroot 2 more programmers.” and “My daily rootine involves a large variety of tasks.” and “Under close scrootiny.” and “We’ve uprooted all the old curriculum and replaced it with modern material.” and “This has been a frootful discussion.”
  • *r*t* → *root*: If you’re looking for some really terrible root puns you can replace any part of any word that even vagely sounds like root: authorootarian, arootstocrat (aristocrat), administrootor, calibrooted, celebrooted, carbohydrootes, concentroot, charooties, commemorootive, conspirootors, cooperootives, culproots, decorootive, demonstroot, culproots, elaboroot, disintegroot, electoroot, droot (drought), erootic (erotic / erratic), frootened (frightened), frustrooted, handwrooten, hypocrootical, illustroots, inferiorooty, integrooted, interproot, insecurooty, integrooty, interprootation, irrootation, irregularooties, laborootory, maturooty, minorooty, misinterprootation, narrootive, narrootor, obscurooty, orchestrooted, penetrooted, popularooty, prootentious, prootagonist, prosperooty, prootestors, regularooty, rootribution, rootaliatory, rootreat, rootrieval, rootrospective, rootorically, securooties, songwrooter, similarooties, terrootorial, throoteningly, strootforward, trootment, undemocrootic, vulgarooty.
  • Start → Starch: As in “I got off to a bad starch.” and “I’ll give you a head starch.” and “Throw it away and starch from scratch.” and “Drivers, starch your engines!” and “Make a fresh starch” and “Can you help me jump starch my car?”
  • Stark → Starch: As in “It stood in starch contrast to all of her previous films.” and “The starch, grey building loomed in the mist.”
  • Star → Starch: As in “Starch Trek” and “Bless my lucky starch.”
  • Thanks bud → Thank spud: As in “Oh, you got this for me? Thank spud :)”
  • Humorous → Tuberous: As in “That was a very tuberous potato pun you just made.”
  • Chip: As in “A chip off the old block.” and “A chip on his shoulder” and “Why don’t we all chip in.” and “As cheap as chips.” and “Let the chips fall where they may.” and “(When) the chips are down.” and “All that and a bag of chips.” and “A bargaining chip.” and “To cash in one’s chips“. Note: “all that and a bag of chips” is used to indicate that something or someone is very special.
  • Cold → Crisp: As in “The air is crisp this morning!”
  • Crisp: As in “Burnt to a crisp“.
  • Fry: As in “Small fry” and “I’ve got bigger fish to fry.”
  • Try → Fry: As in “Fry and stop me!” and “Don’t fry this at home” and “Nice fry.” and “You’ve seen the rest, now fry the best.” and “Don’t fry to walk before you can crawl.” and “I fried my hand at …” and “You’re frying my patience.” and “Fry as I might” and “Fry and fry again.”
  • Fried: As in “I can’t think right now. My brain is fried.”
  • Potato: As in “We were playing hot potato.” and “Meh, small potatoes.” and “Couch potato“.
  • Boil: As in “Keep the pot boiling.” and “It all boils down to this: …”
  • Cheap → Chip: As in “Come now, that was a chip shot.” and “He’s a bit of a chip skate.” and “It’s dirt chip.” and “Talk is chip.” and “We’re doing it on the chip.”
  • Chap → Chip: As in “A young chip came asking for a job but I had to turn him away.”
  • Ship → Chip: As in “Abandon chip!” and “To go down with the chip” and “Mother chip” and “Shape up or chip out” and “That chip has sailed” and “Loose lips sink chips“.
  • Has → Hash: The term “hash brown” refers to a variety of foods which involve shredded potato. Thus, we can make some silly potato puns: “That ship hash sailed.” and “The die hash been cast.” and “Word hash it that …” and “What hash come over you?” and “My ship hash come in.” and “Every dog hash his day.” and “It hash come and gone.” and “She hash thick skin.” and “Once the dust hash settled.” and “One hash to draw the line somewhere.” and “It hash your name on it.” and “The time hash come.”
  • Hashtag: As in “#hashtag yolo”
  • Thought → Tot: As in, “Deep in tot,” and “Food for tot,” and “Hold that tot,” and “Impure tots,” and “It’s the tot that counts,” and “Just when you tot it was safe to go back in the water,” and “Lost in tot,” and “On second tots,” and “Penny for your tots,” and “Perish the tot,” and “School of tot,” and “Shower tots,” and “Let me collect my tots,” and “I don’t follow your train of tot.”
  • Taught → Tot: As in, “Has no-one tot you how to read the time?”
  • Taut → Tot: As in, “The rope is pulled tot,” and “Tot muscles.”
  • Tight → Tot: As in, “A tot corner,” and “Tot as a drum,” and “Goodnight, sleep tot,” and “In a tot spot,” and “Hold on tot!” and “On a tot leash,” and “Run a tot ship,” and “Sit tot,” and “Tot lipped,” and “Tot-en your belt.”
  • Trot → Tot: As in, “The foxtot,” and “Let him tot around a bit,” and “Globe totter,” and “Hot to tot.” Notes: the foxtrot is a type of ballroom dance, and if you’re hot to trot, then you’re eager to get going or started.
  • *tot*: As in: total, tote, totem, totter, totalitarian, totally, prototype, and aristotle.
  • *tit/tat* → *tot*: As in, altotude (altitude), argumentotive (argumentative), attotude (attitude), chastoty (chastity), competotive (competitive), constotute (constitute), destotute (destitute), dictotorial (dictatorial), entoty (entity), gratotude (gratitude), habitot (habitat), identoty (identity), latotude (latitude), quantoty (quantity), tottoo (tattoo), tentotive (tentative), tit for tot (tit for tat).
  • Wedge: As in “I don’t want this argument to drive a wedge between us.” and “I wedged it in there pretty tight.” and “She gave me a massive wedgie.” and “The thin end of a wedge.”
  • Mash: As in “Mashing all the buttons on the controller was my only chance at winning.” and “Don’t just mash the brake pedal!”
  • Match → Mash: As in “They are a mash made in heaven.” and “Game, set, mash” and “Mix and mash” and “We’re a perfect mash.” and “Your potato puns are no mash for my own.” and “Okay, this has just become a shouting mash.” and “That was the day I met my mash.”
  • Back → Bake: As in “At the bake of my mind” and “Bake from the dead” and “Bake to the Future” and “As soon as my bake is turned” and “We’re bake in business” and “Bake in the day …” and “Bake off!” and “Bake to school” and “Bake to nature” and “Cast your mind bake to …” and “Get bake on your feet” and “Go bake on a promise” and “Kick bake and enjoy” and “Money bake guarantee” and “I’ve never looked bake” and “It’s on the bake-burner” and “Take a bake seat” and “Right bake at ya” and “It was a bit of a stab in the bake.” and “You scratch my bake and I’ll scratch yours.” and “Two steps forward, one step bake” and “Some of these potato puns seems little half-baked.”
  • Feel → Peel: As in “You can peel it in your bones.” and “I like the look and peel of the product.” and “I’m trying to get the peel for it.” and “These potato puns are making me peel unwell.” and “I peel a bit put out.” and “I’m peeling my age.” and “Peel the burn”
  • Peel: This word is sometimes used in ways which don’t refer to removing an outer covering: “The aeroplane peeled off from the rest of the formation and did a trick.” In general “peel off/out” means to move away quickly (especially with screeching tires, if it refers to a car).
  • Appeal → Appeel / A peel: “He’s so appeeling!” and “The court allowed one final a peel.” and “You need to a peel to their sense of honour.” and “I’m trying to appeel to your better judgement” and “They have 48 hours to appeel the decision.”
  • Pillar → Peeler: As in “You are a peeler of strength in our community.”
  • Lot of (lot’a) → Latke: As in “That’s a latke potato puns!” Note: a latke is a famous Jewish potato dish, commonly eaten during Hanukkah.

Potato-Related Words

There are many more puns to be made than could be documented in this Punpedia entry, and so we’ve compiled a list of potato-related concepts for you to use when creating your own puns. If you come up with a new pun, please share it in the comments!

potato, spud, white potato, tuber, tuberous, solanum tuberosum, root vegetable, root, tater, murphy, starch, sweet potato, Irish potato, chips, chip, potato chip, mashed, mash, French fries, bake, baked, boiled, boil, roast, yam, crisp, jacket, batata, vichyssoise, shepherd’s pie, cottage pie, swamp potato, hash brown, tatties, gnocci, wedges, peel, skin, peeler, eye, russet, latka

Here are the names of come common potato varieties:

yukon gold, purple peruvian, idaho russet, katahdin, red bliss, adirondack blue, adirondack red, fingerling, carola, inca gold, rose gold, purple viking, russet burbank, kerr’s pink, opperdoezer ronde, kennebec, king edward, laura, doré, melody, parel, duke of york, atlantic, bellitá, bintje, bison, carisma, coliban, desiree, dutch cream, eureka, exton, golden delight, harmony, kennebec, kestrel, king edward, kipfler, lady christl, maranca, mondial, mozart, nadine, nicola, otway red, patrone, pink fir apple, pontiac, purple congo, red rascal, royal blue, savanna, sebago, sifra, toolangi selight, virginia rose, white lady, white star

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